Naïve
“ | oh, BTW, YOUR NASAL VOICE IS MORE GRATING THAN THE WORD "NAIVE", and METAL NAILS ON THE CHALKBOARD.
But "Naive" is even WORSE than NAILS. |
” |
Chris on the dreaded word[1] |
“ | You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. | ” |
Inigo Montoya from The Princess Bride, giving his opinion on the matter |
Naïve is one of Chris's most-used insults; despite this, it is apparently his least favorite word.[2][3] According to Merriam-Webster's English dictionary, the word "naïve" means "deficient in worldly wisdom or informed judgment; especially: credulous"[4]; Chris, however, defines it in his July 10th Messages as merely "questioning one's intelligence", showing that he only understands the most overly simplified definition of the word. By the time of the Jackie e-mails, he had apparently corrected his definition outwardly, but unless he really cares about his non-existent experience, he probably still believes it simply means "stupid".[5] In the Wallflower E-mails, he finally uses the correct definition, confirming that "naive" is really just an unacceptable jab at his unwarranted self-importance.[6] He also refers to it as "the cruelest of words". He often pairs it with "retard", "slow in the mind", or one of his many other CWC-ism insults.
Chris has called others (largely trolls) "naïve" on many occasions. During the Liquid Saga, he remarked that the name Ian Brandon Anderson sounds "about as bad as the word naïve to me now". It has never occurred to Chris that assuming that other people find the word "naïve" as offensive as he does is — well — naïve.
The origins of Chris's disdain for this word likely come from occasions when it has been used against him in attempts to give him constructive criticism, such as the Vivian Gee E-mails. He seems to have twisted its original, relatively polite meaning into the worst insult he can muster. When Kacey's father called him naïve, Chris became enraged, almost to the point of threatening physical violence.
Ironically, back in the comics, he's accurately used it to describe himself in a non-condescending way, being "naive about dating during young adult years", suggesting that he once understood its definition properly. He seems to get seriously offended when other people call him that, but has used it several times to describe himself in the past tense.
Ways in which Chris is naïve
- He believes that Sonichu is a popular internet topic with millions of fans. Despite all of the evidence proving that Sonichu has no real fans (only 5,000 or so trolls), he continues to believe in this delusion on the grounds that he is an "optimist."
- He believes that swallowing his own semen will keep his sperm count high.
- He believes that everyone shares his bad habits.
- He is under the impression that Asperger's must be completely different from High Functioning Autism due to their different names, despite lacking any proof to back this belief, or the fact that people who study and research these disorders for a living prove that they are similar.
- He thinks that all gays are malicious perverts that want to have anal sex, the same beliefs as the Westboro Baptist Church.
- He believes that cartoon characters are real, living beings that exist in an alternate world.[7]
- He believes that registering "digital drawings" with the Library of Congress gives him complete control over anything done with Sonichu.[8]
- He believes that simply being alive counts as "experience", despite the fact that he never goes out to experience anything.
- He believes that correlation implies causation; or, that if he demands something happen (mostly via YouTube video or his now-abandoned website), and - by some miracle - it happens, then his demands must have caused the desired effect. These effects include death or extreme misfortune for people, and downtime or content removal for websites.
- He believes that marijuana is simply a more dangerous cigarette.
- He believed that people who had been insulting and playing tricks on him for years would actually fulfill their promise to give him $9,001 for smashing his PS3.
- He believed that Molvanîa existed.
- He seems to believe that trolls respect video titles.
Sauce
- ↑ From a YouTube comment to Liquid Chris on the REAL Protest against the FAKE video.
- ↑ From Mailbag 21.
- ↑ Autism Tutorial Extra - "...my first least favorite of all time is 'naive'."
- ↑ Merriam-Webster's online entry about "naïve"
- ↑ "Naive; it questions my mentality and experience."
- ↑ ibid. "My least favorite word of ALL time is "naive", NOT because of how it is spelt, but it questions and belittles ones intelligence and experience. I am well-experienced and knowledgeable in a lot of things." Note that the Wallflower did not ask him for this answer.
- ↑ From the second of the Alec Benson Leary calls.
- ↑ The subject of the video "Red Letter CWC Certified Day".