Naïve
“ | oh, BTW, YOUR NASAL VOICE IS MORE GRATING THAN THE WORD "NAIVE", and METAL NAILS ON THE CHALKBOARD.
But "Naive" is even WORSE than NAILS. |
” |
Chris on the dreaded word[1] |
Naïve is one of Chris's most-used insults. According to Merriam-Webster's English dictionary, the word "naïve" means "deficient in worldly wisdom or informed judgment; especially: credulous"[2]; Chris, however, defines it in his July 10th Messages as merely "questioning one's intelligence", showing that he only understands the most overly simplified definition of the word. He also refers to it as "the cruelest of words". He often pairs it with "retard", "slow in the mind", or one of his many other CWC-ism insults. Despite this, it is apparently his least favorite word.[3]
Chris has called others (largely trolls) "naïve" on many occasions. During the Liquid Saga, he remarked that the name Ian Brandon Anderson sounds "about as bad as the word naïve to me now". It has never occurred to Chris that assuming that other people find the word "naïve" as offensive as he does is — well — naïve.
The origins of Chris's disdain for this word likely come from occasions when it has been used against him in attempts to give him constructive criticism, such as the Vivian Gee E-mails. He seems to have twisted its original, relatively polite meaning into the worst insult he can muster. When Kacey's father called him naïve, Chris became enraged, almost to the point of threatening physical violence.
Ironically, back in the comics, he's accurately used it to describe himself in a non-condescending way, being "naive about dating during young adult years", suggesting that he once understood its definition properly.
Ways in which Chris is naïve
- He believes that Sonichu is a popular internet topic with millions of fans. Despite all of the evidence proving that Sonichu has no real fans (only 5,000 or so trolls), he continues to believe in this delusion on the grounds that he is an "optimist."
- He believes that everyone shares his bad habits.
- He is under the impression that Asperger's must be completely different from High Functioning Autism due to their different names, despite lacking any proof to back this belief, or the fact that people who study and research these disorders for a living prove that they are similar.
- He thinks that all gays are malicious perverts that want to have anal sex, the same beliefs as the Westboro Baptist Church.
- He believes that cartoon characters are real, living beings that exist in an alternate world.[4]
- He believes that registering "digital drawings" with the Library of Congress gives him complete control over anything done with Sonichu.[5]
- He believes that simply being alive counts as "experience", despite the fact that he never goes out to experience anything.
- He believes that correlation implies causation; or, that if he demands something happen (mostly via YouTube video or his now-abandoned website), and - by some miracle - it happens, then his demands must have caused the desired effect. These effects include death or extreme misfortune for people, and downtime or content removal for websites.
- He believes that marijuana is simply a more dangerous cigarette.
Sauce
- ↑ From a YouTube comment to Liquid Chris on the REAL Protest against the FAKE video.
- ↑ Merriam-Webster's online entry about "naïve"
- ↑ From Mailbag 21.
- ↑ From the second of the Alec Benson Leary calls.
- ↑ The subject of the video "Red Letter CWC Certified Day."