Duck

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QUACK QUACK
Even in the comic, it's bent. (Maybe he traced it.)
He does not like the ducks.
Indeed a monster.
ChrisChanSonichu (12:20:19 AM): sorry, it is limp.
Chris, on his duck.[1]
MY DUCK HUNGERS FOR TOM-TOM TO POUND!!!!!
Chris, I Am The TRUE, Original Christopher Christian Weston Chandler; No Ifs, Ands or Buts

Duck is a CWC-ism for penis, usually in the context of Chris's own penis. (The genitalia of other males, and those of Rosechus, are pickles.) This neologism was originally thought to be a misspelling of "dick", since 'u' is next to 'i' on the qwerty keyboard, but Chris confirmed in a 17 February 2009 Mumble chat that it is an intentional euphemism.

Chris's chode is bent at a horrifying 45 degree angle. When asked why it is bent, he replied, "it's been that way." Some speculate that Chris has Peyronie's disease, or he did it to himself by mass debating improperly, what's known medically as a fractured penis. In any case, sex would be a painful experience for him.

Chris has used ExtenZe, a supplement advertised to enlarge penises, but he said it didn't work.[2] He proudly claims his penis is 6 inches long;[3] however, this appears highly unlikely (even if he measured both segments). From the looks of it, especially with the bend, Chris's cock is smaller than average.

Knowing that Chris is a pathological liar, he's probably just trying to impress "da ladiez," and is overcompensating. On the off-chance that Chris is indeed not lying, he still proves that having a big penis isn't everything.

Chris at least understands that his cock is of no more than average size, and apparently regrets this fact. In an e-mail to Evan during their feud over Simonla Rosechu, he took off on a peculiar tangent about penis length: "There ARE those with dicks longer than 7 inches; yes I am jealous of those individuals, not just you."

Many of his nude photos show that Chris shaves most of his pubic hair. While this sometimes has the effect of making the penis seem more prominent, in Chris's case it just exposes even more ghostly pale skin.

References by Chris

Anatomical analysis of the duck.

Sauces

See Also

The CWC-tionary

Relationships: Attraction Location | Boyfriend-free girl | Darling | Dating education | Friend Zone | Gal-pal | Heart Level | Homos | Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor | Love Quest | Noviophobia | SLGBTQ | Sweetheart | Sweetheart from the Ground-Up

Sex: China | Comeuppance | Duck | JULAY | Mass debating | Negligent | Pedofork | Pickle | Recycling | Soul Bonding | Virgin with rage | Virginia is for Virgins | Women's rights

Himself: Biological clock | Butt garments | Captain's Log | Christian Love Day | DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS | Fuzzy-Wuzzies & Prickly-Wicklies | Honest Content | I'LL BREAK YOU DEAD | Monthly tugboat | Muscle bra | Random-access humor | Saga | Scale of Respect | Tomgirl |

Stressors: 4-cent_garbage | GOPony | HEXBox | JERKS | Jerkops | Kick the Autistic | Manajerks | Naïve | Niggos | Pmurt | Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens | Slow-in-the-minds | Tobacky

Fantasies: Curse-ye-ha-me-ha | Dimension | Fangs | Godjesus | Iron Curtain | OC | Un-clit

Comics: Anchuent Prophecy | Da Update | Electric Hedgehog Pokemon | Nombie-zazis | Parody | Rosechu | Sonichu | Sub-Episodes | Sweetbolt


See also: Chris and English | List of phrases Chris copied from media