9 October 2009

Captain's Log, Stardate October 9th, 2009 is a video in which Chris states that Barbara does not have AIDS, that he is straight, and that the trolls should GROW UP.

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Transcript

Captain's Log, Stardate October 9th, 2009. I have a, uh, couple of small updates that I wish to, uh, dispell the rumors about...such.

[Dramatic glasses removal]

Uh, number one, my mother WAS at a hospital recently, but SHE DOES NOT HAVE AIDS. Which is a dang [wipes his forehead with the side of his wrist], dan-uh-dang STD that di-dat-em-eh-dat [waves to the camera] makes your immune system go awry, makes it worse make it makes it worse [waves to the camera again] for colds to get in, but my mom does not have AIDS. She went to the hospital because we thought it was [waves to the camera a third time] food poisoning from bad Chinese food. But turned out dah, it turned out that it was colitis, TRIGGERED by s-the spicy food, so my mom can no long-can not eat spicy or sugary foods or drinks.

Colitis is an infection of the colon. You can look it up on the Wik...ipedia.

And also, I wish to reiterate ANOTHER TIME. I. AM. STRAIGHT. I am so sick of being mislabeled as such. Quit e-mailing me with those dang dirty stupid comments! I am NOT GAY, I am NOT BI-SEXUAL, I am STRAIGHT. Get through your damn dirty stupid idiotic immature skulls, and while you're at it [raises hand for illustrative emphasis] grow up! Grow up!

[long pause, grunt] Y'all being really immature in going on with these stupid rumor spreadings. Because you're 'cause-shh [pause] you don't know whe'er they're true or not, and if you don't know whe'er there if they're true or not, then don't say anything. I'll leave you with that, and I am still working on the comic pages, and [wipes the side of his head with the back of his wrist] the CWCipedia will be update-will have another update. This weekend.

[peace sign] Peace out, and have a safe day.