Show RESPECT to me, "C"CWC

Captain's Log, Stardate August 22nd, 2009 is a video where Chris sings Arethra Franklin's "Respect," demanding people not only respect him but also praise him.

Notably is that Chris fails at spelling "Respect" which is clearly spelled out in the song.

Video

Click to load content

“

R-E-S-T-E-D-C!

”

Transcript

Captain's Log, Stardate August 22nd, 2009.

Th' name is Christian Weston Chandler, birth name Christopher, Spanish nickname Ricardo, [shakes head] NO OTHER NAME.

[Begins drawing on a piece of paper, using the Gitar as an impromptu writing surface with some difficulty]

I am so sick of hearing that stupid name that somebody made up back when I had that IBAChandler account, and I be a Chandler. You know, "I" being myself, "B" standing for specifying who I am, and "Chandler" being my last name.

I tell you, I'm so sick of getting all this disrespect. You dis-- you continue dissing me, you're dissing Charlottesville, and everybody-- and all the indi-- and all the individual citizens, and als-- you also diss Ruckersville. I'm so sick of the disrespest. We do not need disrespect in this world, all it does is just...makes me feel bad. And do you want me to feel bad? Do you want me to stop drawing the comics? [Shakes head] And I am not going to stop drawing the comics, not as long as I [begins singing, with his usual level of talent] DARE! TO! SURVIIIIIVE! It's calling me on to victory! [Stops, to the relief of millions]

Anyway, all I'm-- anyway, I am definitely getting all th-- into the works. It's all in the papers...everything is in the papers.

[Chris begins to speak in the rhythm of the song he's about to sing (or tries to, anyway)]

So, all I'm askin', ya dern dummy
Cause guess what? I give ya all my workin'.
I'm castin', my pearls before swine.
But yet do I complain? Not really.
All I'm askin', in return dudes and dudettes
'sa lil' bit of respet.

'Cause ya you know me. I'm the artist.
I'm the original, there's no substitute.
If you don't like it, well y'all can go sommere else
like to Hell.

Eh, but the rest of you, give me my praises
I tell you what, you'll get my blessin's.
and I tell you what, trolls, you're so trollin' stupid
don't give a dare.

[Finishes drawing, then holds up the artistic abortion he has created]

Fresh sample, match it to any book. 'Cause you know, all I'm asking for...

[Jump cut to Chris cueing Aretha Franklin performing and Chris preparing to rape it with his mouth]

What you want, man I got it.
What you need, you know I got it.
All I'm askin'--PEOPLE!--is for a li'l respect.

Der be lel beh,
Just a little bit.
Just a little bit,
Just a little bit.

I ain't gonna do you wrong, where you goin', WOMAN?
[Mumbles incoherently through this entire line]
But all I'm askin', is for a little respect.

Der be lel beh, [dramatic glasses removal] baby,
Just a little bit.
Just a litle bit,
Just a little bit.

Uz give you all my workin'.
And all I'm askin' returndudesanddudettes,
Is to PRAISE me, und duh pluz smer git ho! [sic]

AY, SHOUT IT LOUD I'M TRUE!
PRAISE ME!
HAVE FAITH! Show me respect!
I'm so sick of that hazing and mislabelings!
You keep it up you're gonna continue to be cursed!
Otherwise withthetrue andthefaithful, y'all continue to get my blessin's!
Oooh, YA PRAISES!
Sweeter'n honey.
But guess what?
Salt is my money.
Oh, what you do for me ip-- dip-- is praise me when you get home!
Bleah, baby!
PRAISE ME WHEN YOU GET HOME!
LADIES! give it to me!
R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me!
R-E-S-T-E-D-C, drink it, TCB!
Suckittome, suckittome, suckittome, suckit--GIVE ME RESPECT!