Chris Chan's Public Announcement
In the first YouTube video posted by Christian since the launch of his Encyclopedia Dramatica page, Christian assumes the ED contributors have simply misunderstood him and his work, and attempts to re-introduce himself so that things can start over on the right foot.
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Transcript
Hello. My name is Christian Weston Chandler… from Ruckersville, Virginia. [puts on glasses] It has come to my attention that I have a lot-- more fans of my electronic-- Electric Hedgehog Pokemon Sonichu that I had originally thought. And I thank each and every one of you for your support. And I will draw more comics, uh, when I get some positive inspiration, or, uh, when I feel like it. After all, everybody else-- everybody has a life; so do I. I have a life. [inhales sharply]
Anyway, it has also come to my attention that I have a lot of people who may have picked up on the wrong theories of my person. [inhales sharply] I will not quote any hate sites, but I would like to humbly apologize for appearing to be some kind of sleaze, troll, badass, or whatever adjectives, good or explicit, you may feel about me. [inhales sharply]
Please understand: I am a 25 year-old, high-functioning autistic male… with a simple, peaceful dream… of becoming a father… of a sweet, little, pretty girl, who I will dub…ly name “Crystal Weston Chandler”. “Crystal”: a name that sounds similar to mine, but it has a nice ring to it. And it’s also similar to the illustrious metal that is mined from the Earth’s ground. “Weston”: my mother’s maiden name and a proper English name from royal descent. As a matter of fact, among my, uh, mother’s side in the uh, ancestrial traits [inhales sharply] we have uh, we have been traced down to Daniel Weston, who was on the main Mayflower voyage. And, uh, beyond him, Anne Boleyn, who was the uh, one of H-- Henry VIII's… King Henry VIII's wives, who gave birth to, uh, Queen Elizabeth I. And “Chandler”: the, uh, name-- the family name my father had. And, uh, from his, uh, line, uh, we have uh, from his side of the family, we have the, uh, Cherokee blood. I'm one-sixteenth. [inhales sharply] And from among us Cherokees, there are very few of us left because we were big in number, but then came along the, uh, forced march on the Trail of Tears, where some of us went into hiding… Yeah, short line there: Cherokees. We're a respected tribe. We should be respected, anyway… even though we were forced onto the Trail of Tears. But that's another-- that's another-- whole 'nother story you can go read-- you can learn about in your local libraries.
Ahem. My mother and my father are both really nice, old-fashioned-type people who not only gave the birth-- gave me birth at their ages… which my mother is 66, currently, and my father is currently 80. They both just turned that way in the last couple of months. And, uh, I was born in 1982. They gave me the birth… then, and, uh, anyway, it was so nice of-- for them to give me the, uh, birth during the early 1980s.
I was diagnosed with high-functional autism, and I lived a, uh, somewhat rough life. I've had an abusive babysitter at one time, [inhales sharply] and some of the teachers and principals of Nathanael Greene Elementary School… that I was attending in later years: about, uh, late 1980s, early 1990s… [inhales sharply] They abused me-- they abused me by pinning me to the ground with, uh, their ha-- with, uh, holding my wrists and my ankles, pinning me down to the ground and-- and audiotaping my cries and shouts. But anyway, my mother and my father, they both fought the court system, the Greene County court system, which, uh, they were not a very nice bunch of people, very not. Hands down. But anyway, we eventually moved to Chesterfield County for a nice, better school system. And one teacher in particular, of Providence Middle School, who I would like to give much kudos to, who w-- who was-- who, uh, let-- who not-- who not only, uh, let me-- who was a good-- good, uh, person to go by dur-- uh, during my mainstreaming, and she was also the uh, also a good leader in my learning to cope. I wish to give kudos to Mrs. Virginia Jeanine Sanford, of Providence Middle School, in Chesterfield County, whose picture is, uh, in the trailer of my "CWC on TV" DVD, which is also on the-- the YouTube.
And after being on honor roll throughout, uh, Providence Middle and Manchester High, Sonichu was first thought up in my senior year at Ma-- [abrupt jump cut] …along with a nice bunch of teachers backing me up and my circle of gal pals. I mostly had gal-- mostly had that circle during my high school years. Anyway, after all that, I graduated. I graduated. Then, we moved back to, uh, our old home in Ruckersville, where I attended Piedmont Virginia Community College, and eventually I graduated from there, too, with a degree in Computer-Aided Drafting and Design, also known as "CAD/CAM".
And, uh, during my high school years, I was used to being surrounded by… girls… in my circle, and after having to, uh, leave them I felt ever so lonesome. And after the stress from some of the people-- people at PVCC, as well as my mental block [mimes punching himself in the head] of autism, it became hard from me to approach gir-- approach the girls like I used to. And I would like to point out right now, at this-- at, uh-- during my-- ever since I-- ever-- during the whole-- my whole Sweetheart Search has started, when I turned 21 on February 24, 2002. Anyway, beyond that date, I never have stalked anybody. Never have stalked. I'm telling you right-- I'm telling you right now. All I did was sit around, with a sign by my side, that said I was looking for a Boyfriend-Free Girl, 18-25, yadda yadda yadda, all tha-- [abrupt jump cut] …page. And I did all that, because I had feared rejection, and the Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor, because you cannot tell which ladies are paired up, and which are not, and wedding rings? That's just a whole different story, 'cause they're married, because y-- it's not like you give every women a ring who's already paired up. [long pause] Well, that's just one perspective. [inhales sharply] But anyway, uh, I did not move from my seat… at all, unless I needed to go use the restroom. That's it. Okay? I never moved from my seat while I'm sitting around waiting for the girl to come to me. ‘Cause that's all I'm doing there: I'm just waiting for a girl to come talk to me, 'cause... [inhales sharply] like I said, I'm afraid to approach them… at that point.
So please understand: I am not a violent person. I'm decent. I come from a caring, loving pair of parents. I'm kind, I'm considerate, I will respect your space [removes glasses] - and your feelings - ever so much. [puts glasses back on and inhales sharply] And… I apologize for my MySpace profile, if it appears to reflect anything on the contrary of all that. I apologize that I appear to be a [puts on a “slow” voice and sways with each word] slowww-miiinded perrrsonnn! [abrupt jump cut] I'm sorry for reflecting any negative feelings towards each of you that have felt them, including those who have had such feelings they have created, uh, demeaning web pages. All I ask-- all I ask are those people who are watching this right now, is just… take them down? Please? I'm asking as an innocent victim of misunderstanding, just take down your web pages, or edit them to positively better reflect my feelings as an individual, as a person… as a man who has suffered, like most everybody in this world that we all live in. [sighs]
Thank you very much for li-- for your time, and listening, and please remember: I'm a innocent person. Just like most every one of you, I've had my faults, I've had my share of… bad times, and I have my share of good times. Please understand that. Thank you again, [holds up hand in peace sign] and take care.
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