Mal-Wart
| “ | But I sat silent for a minute, then I said to him, “I do not speek [sic] to any Man other than myself, because they all have taken all the pretty girls leaving me with none.” Verbal Combat had started, and during the fight, I ran off, still giving verbal punishment, as well as da finger, and many “Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Has.” I nearly backed up onto him with my car, and I gave him another finger. Then I dashed off. | ” |
| CWC's Diary, 22 June 2005 | ||
The site of the new Ruckersville Wal-Mart
Mal-Wart is Chris's rather shitty (and mildly evocative of foot fungus) anagram for Wal-Mart in his comics.
Love Quest
In June 2005 the Charlottesville Wal-Mart served as an Attraction Location for Chris's never ending Love Quest. Chris would go to the in-store McDonald's, set up his stuff, and wait around for hours.
On 22 June 2005 Chris was confronted by the men he identified as B-Manajerk and Merried Seinor Comic, who took issue with his Attraction Sign and called the jerkops on him. Chris hid the sign and denied that he had it, but he was banned from entering the Wal-Mart anyway. However, Chris interpreted this to mean he was only banned from the McDonald's he was in at the time.
On 25 June, Chris attempted again to loiter and came into conflict with the B-Manajerk over his Pixelblock sculptures. The conflict drew the attention of the W-M-Manajerk. When the Wal-Mart manager attempted to reason with him, Chris ran away, almost hitting the manager with his car. He would later gloat about this.
Chris would return to Wal-Mart in October 2009, forcing one of the female employees to measure him for a sports bra.
Unfortunately, they decided to build a new store right next door to him in Ruckersville,[1] which opened on 18 August 2010.[2] In the Jackie e-mails Chris said he was looking to apply here. Look forward to many more overweight autistic loitering and soliciting, jerkop-related lulz and mishaps, and eventual bannings & restraining orders. Chris drove past the new Wal-Mart on his day out in October 2010.
References in the comic
Chris chronicles his expulsion from Wal-Mart in Sonichu #3, Sub-Episode 4. In Chris's fantasy world, instead of being asked to leave nicely, he is confronted by B-Manajerk and Merried Seinor Comic and instead of whatever verbal exchange that may have actually occurred Chris fights the Manajerks as Super Chris-Chan Sonichu alongside Darkbind. It's impossible to discern what actually happened, but because of Chris's refusal to leave, or stay away, the Wal-Mart Regional Manager appears on the scene as W-M-Manajerk.
These events are reprinted in Sonichu #4, Sub-Episode 4 part 2 were the fight between Chris and W-M-Manajerk continues. Chris's interpretation of the events take a huge departure from reality. To battle W-M-Manajerk Chris uses his pixel block Heart Torch to summon his identical twin sister Crystal Weston Chandler (not to be confused with his future daughter, doubly named Crystal Weston Chandler). After a bizarre display of super powers and some long, boring speeches, Chris wins and buys Crystal lunch.
B-Manajerk, Merried Seinor Comic and W-M-Manajerk all reappear in Sonichu #7 as part of the Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens.
Potential employee
At Jackie's prompting, Chris applied for work at Wal-Mart in October 2010.[3]
See also
Sauces
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