Kiwi Farms

This article is about the Kiwi Farms message board. For the original forum it's based on, see CWCki Forums. For the Kiwi Farms splinter forum, see CWCki Club.

“	THANKS A LOT YOU GOD DAMNED BUNCH OF BASTARDOUS CHILDREN!!! Her Life Is Ruined!!! And It was My Fault for TRYING TO MAKE PEACE WITH YOU LOT!!! I Really Wish I Never Created THIS New Account and Tried to Reach Out!!!	”
Chris, posting on Kiwi Farms

“	Chris-Chan the author of Sonichu, a comic book, with an Internet history going back 10 years.	”
Description of Christian Weston Chandler board.

Chris's forum avatar.

Previously existing as a Chris-focused message board in various iterations, in February 2015 the CWCki Forums was consolidated into the Kiwi Farms, an extremely controversial site which focuses on lolcows (people and groups whose eccentric or foolish behavior can be "milked" for amusement and laughs) in general and not just CWC. (The new name came from the way several lolcows mispronounced "CWCki Forums".)

On 4 October 2017, a user going by the name "LegendaryChristorian" began a thread on the Christian Weston Chandler board on the forum. While a few speculated about it being a ween, Null, the head admin, quickly confirmed that it was indeed Chris. Under this account, Chris received questions to which he responded in a livestreamed Q&A video.

His motivation for joining and holding the Q&A was to reach out to trolls and try to satiate their curiosity about his life by answering their questions, in the hopes that they wouldn't bother Jessica Quinn. However, since Quinn was herself a troll, the interaction with the Farms instead proved instrumental in her breaking up with Chris on 5 October, after which he made a final, angry post on the forum before cursing it in another video.

Posts

Good Day, People! Pin This To The Top

by LegendaryChristorian, 4 October 2017, 1:22 pm Your combined dream is realized, for I Am The Miss Christine Weston Chandler, and I am here to address my followers (bad ones included, and forgiven (just Do Not talk more Mockery, Smack or anything I would not initially say, against me)). I come here today to begin in directly taking on any applicable, and acceptable questions about myself; No Personal Details, Mind You. But there Is a catch, a simple price for my attendance here to answer your LittleBigQuestions. Firstly, NONE of You, nor ANY of your associates, friends, allies, ecetera, will EVER contact, NOR mal-tweet, NOR mal-comment, ANY and ALL of My Friends, Family And Associates. This, Especially Includes my Sweetheart. I Understand you all have a common desire: My Happiness and Good Future; this goes appreciated very much. But the happiness of My Closest Ones are Most Important to me. As for face-to-face, Offline, should any of you catch me at such a moment, I ask that None of you Follow or Stalk me, UNLESS You are Courageous enough to greet me kindly and share a Pleasent moment. In the company of my Sweetie, such stalking is most questionable. I will have little to no discomfort upon anyone else in my presence. Consider My Personal Space and Person a SAFE SPACE I will personally NOT tolerate any mal-content within mine, or ANY of my friends, family or associate's Total Local Space. I will come onto here Once a Week, take down some Questions, and I will answer them on a live-streaming video soon after. I am in development of making this the limited-time routine. One FAQ I Will address Right Now, so it will NOT Be Repeated in My Single Thread On Here: "Why don't you get a job/why don't you take more responsibility/why don't you just grow up already?" Obviously, those who ask this and these questions likely are already employed themselves, or are spoiled in their own individual lives, and do not appreciate how tough it is to simply Get A Job. I Have a TON and S***-Load of Responsibilities and Worries here at home care-taking my mother, dogs, cats, and to my own passion of my Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon Family, my City of Cwcville, my own Only-Me Psychic Connection to my family and friends there, in that dimension. So, I'll be darned if I Do Not already have enough on my plate at most given times, as they are at those respective moments. And I Have Matured Emotionally and Mentally; More than you could ever imagine. And I do have a great empathy skill, so I am fully capable of putting myself into any of your individual shoes. ALSO, I would very much appreciate being addressed and referred to in the Female Pronouns, from Now On, not only in this Thread, but All Threads. And my Name is Christine; Chris or Chris Chan is also acceptable when addressing me. Mainly Remember, please, that I Am Woman. I will leave you all for the moment with these words. My Time and Presence on These Forums of yours are NOT to Troll any of you. I will Not Bully Anyone, and I certainly have not, nor will ever, Harass anyone. I can and will offer kindness and support on the safe online areas of my Twitter, Facebook, or similar Social Media pages where I do frequent in the Typing form of communication or sharing. I Am a person, Just like Each and Every One of You All, but I Am Better than to sink to a Trolling level, despite any and all past times I have felt need to. And Those will Not be brought up again, if you all will please. My information past and present shared May go towards making a better documentary or series of my characters. USE COMMON SENSE, and LOVE; my stories are Not Dark, and aside from my trial at saucy tidbits, The main targeted age rating is TV-Y7 And Above. Y7! I encourage fan creativity, stylish arts as individually possible, but also retro style and in younger skill levels for those who Are in that age range, or are mentally alone in that age range. Let us all make this a Brighter and Better Future not only for Me, but Everyone I Care for and About Very Much from my Heart and Soul. Love Is Love! I thank you all for your understanding, compassion, kindness and respect. To each and every one of you, with all due respect, I wish you a Great and Safe Day. Sincerely, Miss Christine Weston Chandler (formerly known as Christopher and Christian).

I CURSE EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU ALL!!! To Hell, Back, Hell, Back, and Hell Again!!!

by LegendaryChristorian, 5 October 2017, 2:40 pm THANKS A LOT YOU GOD DAMNED BUNCH OF BASTARDOUS CHILDREN!!! Her Life Is Ruined!!! And It was My Fault for TRYING TO MAKE PEACE WITH YOU LOT!!! I Really Wish I Never Created THIS New Account and Tried to Reach Out!!! Good Fucking Bye!!!

Lurking

“	Chris doesn't read your posts	”
A somewhat inaccurate line from the forum guidelines.

Much like with the CWCki Forums, Chris has occasionally been known to lurk on Kiwi Farms. In 2015, after posting some photos to Facebook showing what he believed to be progress on his gender transition, Chris viewed the forum thread on it and was elated when a user commented "he looks like a D cup now".

In August 2017, Chris, feeling refreshed after his trip to BronyCon, browsed the thread on it. On Facebook, he made a few posts responding to commentary and thanking users for featuring his photos. In the same month, he referred to the Random Chris Updates thread to help prove a ween was trying to impersonate Doopie.

In October 2017, Chris stated that he believed Jessica Quinn was not a troll because conversations between them hadn't been leaked, and he specified that he had not seen any such leaks on the Farms.

Forum ratings

Chris rated several of DoopieDoOver's posts from the end of the Jessica Quinn saga, the only ones he has rated so far.

• Like

at least that would be more interesting than this god damned shitfest

• Like

I know I said I wouldn't come back and post, but this whole saga is really upsetting me. While I don't agree with a lot of the trolling and fucking with him for the lulz, this is going too far. Even if it's supposed to be a "troll", this is pretty fucked up and it hurts to watch. I can't stand to see someone with a disability be emotionally abused and manipulated like this. She's not even a funny troll. She could have at least gone on the date they planned, but she dipped out because she's a pussy. I actually really feel bad for Chris.

• Optimistic

At this point, do you really think he's capable of growing and learning?

Christorical figures

A number of people associated with Christory have accounts on the forum.

Alec Benson Leary

Main article: Alec Benson Leary

BlueSpike

Main article: BlueSpike

BlueSpike's presence in Kiwi Farms is debated heavily on whether the account is True and Honest due to anecdotes claiming that site staff verified him as a joke.

LoveYouLongTime

Main article: Emily

Marvin

Main article: Man in the Pickle Suit

Null

Null (real name: Joshua Moon) is the owner and manager of the Kiwi Farms.

In 2014, after Chris accidentally burned down his house, Null sympathized, as he himself had suffered a house fire in his youth. He organized a fundraiser on the forum that resulted in several hundred dollars worth of supplies being sent as a care package for Chris to get on his feet again, with the remainder of the amount sent as a money order. Mistakenly thinking that the money order was signed incorrectly (and thus rendered useless), Chris insulted Null by calling him a "Dodo brain" on Facebook.

In 2017, Chris piled on by tweeting "Null is a dull lull; LOL."

During the spring of 2018, Chris' attitude toward Null improved as Null began acting as his volunteer advisor, helping him by filtering his email messages to weed out ween messages, from legitimate business dealings as well as offering advice, such as warning Chris not to invade people's personal space at other conventions after Chris' behavior had gotten him kicked out of TooManyGames. He had felt motivated to assist Chris after learning that malicious weens had scammed Chris out of enough money to put him at risk of losing his home. Chris drew an art piece to show appreciation for his efforts in May 2018, and followed Kiwi Farms's Twitter account a few days later.

Alongside fellow users Marvin and The Captain, Null has played an integral role in dismantling the schemes the Idea Guys had put in motion from June 2018 onwards, and leaked the Discord chat where the Idea Guys attempted to extort Chris for thousands of dollars in conjunction with threatening to falsely claim he was a pedophile to the FBI. Ironically, the forum who had followed and laughed at Chris for many years were the only ones who hung around and attempted to help him.

“	when Chris first started messaging me he said that Stan Smith from American Dad said I was somehow affiliated with the FBI/CIA, which I think is entirely his head canon. If you wonder why I'm a big softy with Chris, there's a good example.	”
Null

• 

  Pony Null

• 

  Chris follows KF

• 

  Pony Null appears in a bonus page for Sonichu #12-9

Summary of the Guard Dog Saga (and other commentaries)

During a YouTube livestream, Null recounts his attempt to advise Chris on how to protect himself following the events of the Idea Guy Saga. Unsurprisingly, he gave up this futile endeavor, as Chris apparently refused to converse with anyone who did not wish to indulge his fantasies. Jump to 1:29:33 in the link.

Summary of Guard Dog Saga (and other commentaries)
Click to load content
Search for video	YouTube, archive
Stardate	26 November 2018
Saga	Guard Dogs Guard Dogs
Other	Audio Audio

The Captain

During spring 2018, The Captain, Marvin and Null stopped the Idea Guys after learning the extent of their maliciousness. For some time since then, he would act as an adviser for Chris and as a middleman between what is happening with Chris behind the scenes and Kiwi Farms. Highlights include him personally intervening after learning of Chris scamming people for money and using three ill stray kittens he had adopted as a vehicle for this. Fortunately, The Captain managed to contact a local Kiwi in Charlottesville, who adopted Liza, one of the three. Another is implying that Chris has IRL friends who offered him marijuana and acting similarly to the Idea Guys. Like Null, he has ceased involvement with Chris.

Unfortunately, as much as they try to tard-wrangle Chris, there is one thing they can't protect Chris from: himself.

See also

• CWCki
• Tomboys and Tomgirls of Virginia
• Trollin' Train
• Sonichu Girls
• GameFAQs

External links

• The Chris subforum on Kiwi Farms