LoveYouLongTime E-mails, 2013-2014

This page contains e-mails between Chris and the various Gal Pals played by Emily, from 2013-2014.

Madicon

Fri, Jan 4, 2013 at 10:18 AM Just checking in. Have y'all returned from your cruise yet? And a reminder to renew and inform me of your P.O. Box number, please. Other than that, it is same-old, same-old for me; the usual financial complaining from my mother; me feeling depressed, lonely, afraid and paranoid; etc. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Tue, Jan 8, 2013 at 5:41 PM We got back from our cruise and Magfest! :) Haven't renewed my P.O. Box since were still getting back into the swing of routine here. Also, we have a pile of work to accomplish since our absence. I'll let you know once I get that down. Why are you feeling paranoid? I thought that trolls have been leaving you alone. :( At least you have your mom, the dogs, and the cats. And you're BFF, me! Teehee.

Tue, Jan 8, 2013 at 5:42PM We should talk on the phone again soon. :) I enjoyed our conversation last time and it brought back good memories.

Thu, Jan 10, 2013 at 8:23 PM Actually, the Trolls still continuously call me and my mother on our respective cellphones. They continue talking ill about me on the Internet. Googling my name still results in over 2 million, 800 thousand negative pages, images, etc. Pranksters still come over and egg our home and vehicles. And what makes me feel most paranoid of people, in addition to not being able to separate the single women from those taken by the majority of the male population, but ANYONE, including and especially the "Police" around here, can be and are the Trolls who continue to haunt me and my dreams. So opening up to new people by myself is THAT much more difficult. I continue to feel lonely and depressed daily, and my heart aches as well. *sigh* Anyway, I will ship the figures to you as soon as I get your P.O. Box, plus I lost the zip code in my mess, so I need that as well, please. Sent from my iPhone

Sat, Jan 12, 2013 at 8:33 PM Hey Chris! That sucks about the google thing, but you know, most of those probably aren't you. For example, if I google "Christian Chandler", a lot of the links are going to give me things about the Christian religion, or about Chandler from Friends, not about you. Only a handful of those responses are about you. Also, Google customizes search results based on your internet cookies, so if you're searching your own name every day google will tailor your search to show more about you, but that doesn't mean other people would get as many results about you. So don't feel so down! :) But has someone been egging your house recently? When is the last time it happened? How many times has it happened?

Sun, Jan 13, 2013 at 10:54 AM Just a few days ago was the last time our house was egged, about the day I last emailed you. I regoogled my name with quotation marks; "Christian Chandler" found near 30,000; "Christian Weston Chandler" found near 640,000 results. I stand corrected, but it all still does not make me feel any better. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Mon, Jan 14, 2013 at 9:31 PM Oh wow, that sucks. It's probably neighborhood kids who egged your house. You know how kids are. Oh, and I saw that picture of your graduation on your facebook. Could I get a scan of that? A higher resolution version would be nice to have. :)

Tue, Jan 15, 2013 at 10:37AM I currently am unable to scan photos. Plus, I feel more sad from looking at it. ........... I continue to feel really down, and my heart aches. I am in a slump. I try to think of how in my position to attract women to approach me when I am out. But I continue to come up with repeated ideas, and ideas that take me back to my square one of sign use. It is impossible for the while and moments for me to get any to much confidence in self. I have damaged myself too much with all of the shit uploaded under troll influence within the past half decade. So everything is MY fault, and I find it difficult to make peace with myself on all that. I feel like an outcast and a failure, and I am unable to recover from it all. I wish I could travel back to 1999 and re-route my future for the better. ΤTYL. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Tue, Jan 15, 2013 at 4:26 PM Ah man that's really a bummer! What kinds of clubs and bars have you been going to to attract women? How are you strutting your stuff to attract women? Are you being as confident as Danny from Grease? Great movie, you should definitely check it out. :) Danny is such a cutie that all the gals want. Try to keep your chin up and stay positive. Only you can change your future. One day you'll find your Sandy. ;)

Wed, Jan 16, 2013 at 10:59 AM Ha. I have watched Grease twice, so I get your references. Actually, I have been feeling compelled to keep at my mother's side to help her. I do not go to bars much now, only relative place I would go to once in a while is TGI Fridays. I am most UNABLE to fake confidence, so referring some past leather jacket wearing, hair gelled, possibly Jewish and Italian 60s or 70s icon is not going to help me out much. Aaaaaayy. Answer: Arthur Fonzerellifrom "Happy Days". I feel like I have shut emotions out to most everyone. It would take a LOT, and only from a woman who was truthfully in love with me for the long haul, in person, for me to take down my emotional walls. It also hurts me, in the heart, when I feel a certain amount of happy or positive emotions. And I think I have mostly forgotten the happier person I was over the half decade ago. Why does my adult life have to be cursed with cruel people not only locally, but Around the Freaking World. I really wish I could go back to 1999 and reroute my future. And the heartaches come about more often, but still mildly, when I am outside of my house. To change the subject, I have recently downloaded and watched "Flatliners" (a 1990 movie starring Joe Schuemaker). I found it very interesting and well put on the theory of what a person may see after dying. It may not be the path towards a light, and not necessary hell, but trapped in a continuous looping of the event of what one has been subconsciously feeling guilty about from their life. It is a thriller that really makes you think more about your life. I recommend it; available on PSN and iTunes; maybe on DVD. TTYL Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Thu, Jan 17, 2013 at 7:50PM I sympathize with you about what you're going through with your mother. But one thing that comes to mind about that is that you're not really qualified to take care of her. Taking care of an elderly parent is a full time job, especially with her past health problems. Have you considered putting her in some sort of home or having an at home nurse? It would alleviate some of the stress caring for her and give you more time to socialize and get out into the World. Since you couldn't go to Magfest I'll be going to another convention in March. It's called Madicon and it's actually being held at JMU, so that's not far away at all! It's a small convention but it looks like fun. You could come down for a day. http://madicon.org/ Let me know what you think. :)

Wed, Jan 23, 2013 at 12:35AM I would Never ever put my mother in one of those homes. And she is against having someone else coming in, because not only of the great amount of mess inside, but she is paranoid of most anyone coming in and thieving any of the (valuable?) stuff among the mess. *sigh* I have given the Madicon lots of thought since I read your email a few days ago. At first, it did spark a small interest in me, because it was local. But I feel my lack of presence, even for an extended amount of time greater than half a day would not be suitable and the what ifs are present. Also, we are considerably poor, mostly due to my impulsiveness on the credit cards, and I continue to pay her back from my SSI and all. I am sadly unable to afford the (shorter distance) trip, and mom is insistent on the gasoline costs as well as the temperature conditions. My great responsibilities here, constant mishaps upon myself, the lack of socializing, and my Great Depression, I feel is all among the greater Punishment upon me from God for ALL of the shit I had put onto the Internet under troll influence and my spending habits and whatever else only Emanuel knows. Even when I leave the house for the usual errands and coffee break, I feel the loneliness and depression within me worsen and my heart aches. I feel I am beyond help, and that saddens me more. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Wed, Jan 23, 2013 at 4:02 PM It's a bummer that you can't get the house cleaned up for an in care nurse. You'd definitely need to pick the right one to prevent thieving, but typically there's nothing to be worried about. I'm only worried about your health as well, because it seems the burden of caring for your mother is wearing you down, physically and emotionally. I apologize if this seems too brunt and honest, but at this point your mother is holding you back from having a social life (or any sort of life), let alone a girlfriend. I suggest asking Rocky about this, because I'm sure she has the resources to help you with this. Or at least some ideas to help you get back on your feet. I understand that you want to keep your mother happy, but sometimes it's okay to be selfish every once in a while to keep yourself happy. :) Which brings me back on the topic of Madicon. Since it's not that far from where you live, you can go down for a day instead of the entire weekend. Its only $15, plus gas money which shouldn't be THAT much. Geting to and from there would maybe cost me $25-30 in gas and I drive a truck. I'm sure your car gets better gas mileage than me. I didn't realize that you signed up for credit cards again. What kinds of stuff are you buying? Chris, I really want you to think about going to Madicon, even for a day. What kind of things are you worried about? I can try and alleviate some of your worries. It seems like you'll be afraid of being ignored or something, but you'll continue to remain invisible if you allow yourself to be. I know you're stronger than that! Just think of going to Madicon as a way to treat yourself for the hard work you've done to take care of your mom and the dogs!

Thu, Jan 24, 2013 at 1:41 PM I have talked with my mother about Madicon, she is allowing me to make the one day trip on the Saturday. I will preregister soon. I still have ill feelings about meeting people in a convention, which I will go into detail about in my next email to you. On another topic, did you get the Skylanders games? And if so, I am still able to ship the figures to you anytime, or I will bring them with me and deliver them to you personally at the convention. And let me know how you like the games so far. On that note, the few figures I am currently selling on eBay are Only the one remaining extra Cynder #2 I have, plus a few more I have acquired on the side towards completing my collection, including the limited time recent GameStop promotion of the Frito Lay Skylanders Sidekicks; got all four. At the least, to try to get back at least the 65 spent on the Wii U version of the Giants game. TTYL Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Sat, Jan 26, 2013 at 4:15 PM mostly paranoid and nervous when I am among groups of people. There is also the matter of wanting to stay out of trouble and dangers. After I had turned 21 in 2003, I ended up in the amounts of trouble from trying to meet people and make (female) friends. Starting from the start of my Sweetheart Search, where my Trying to Make Friends was constantly mistaken for Solicitation of the wrong variety. Mary Lee Walsh destroying my signs and cheap newsletters, making it Obvious True, Honest Love was Illegal in Virginia. The various Manajerks and Jerkops causing me grief with Handcuffs, Arrests and Shit. Me being constantly ignored and forced to feel Publically Invisible by the general public. The Trolls and Cyber-Bullies killing me deeply and emotionally for over five years. Most ANYONE in Public Anywhere can be any one of the Trolls I try to avoid. Michael Snyder Banning me and then worse. My autism has also caused me to react in a way greatly misunderstood by others even long before, scaring everyone around me at those times. There is A LOT going on in my head and subconscious that greatly keeps me from socializing as good as I was, at my best in High School. I feel really pathetic and weak. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Sat, Jan 26, 2013 at 9:29 PM There has to come a time in your life where you have to rise above your paranoia. Even if somebody at Madicon recognizes you, you can say either, you're cosplaying as Chris(you). Or take advantage of how well known you are and milk it for all it's worth (ie have people pay money to get a picture with you). If they make fun of you, just blow it off. If you care, then they will have more of a reason to go at it. Who knows, considering how well known you are you might find a girl who is impressed by you. I just think that Madicon would be good for you because it'll be getting you out in the public again to mingle with people who have similar interests as you. A few years ago you had more spirit and fight in you. I miss that part of you. .(

Sun, Jan 27, 2013 at 11:25AM Yes, I wondered where the me from before October, 2007 went off to. Oh, wait. He fell for all of the blackmail and influence of Trolls and Cyber-Bullies, made a bad name for himself with the shit he uploaded, became paranoid and afraid from all of the bad events and shame of it all, and became me of today. Anyway, I will be attending the Madicon on Saturday, and I am planning on going inconspicuously. Did you see the movie, "Eyes Wide Shut"? Spoiler Alert; I will be going in costume as the lead man did with a cloak, hood and gold mask. I will check the party store next week after I get some more funds. I would feel better remaining unrecognized and being known for the actual person inside and NOT based on the bad shit online. I spent nine dollars on that cake "Jackie" coerced me into sitting bare-assed and pretending to freaking fart on. :( Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe,

Tue, Jan 29, 2013 at 6:04 PM Hey [REDACTED], I had given a suggestion from one of my acquaintance church members of match.com some thought, and decided what the hay. I had found someone else used my email address and made up a fake account name and password on there (both of which were obscene and yuck), so I've changed both of them to better suit. There was no profile info inputed, so I filled in the blanks. I am thinking of waiting 'til the income to begin subscription at 15 a month. I went with "cwcvilleguardian" for my username (same as my Facebook, and linked, but all posts relative are set to Only Me). I still plan on going to Madicon on the Saturday, paying at the door at that time. I would like your thoughts on the match.com plan, and if you are able to read my profile on there, I would appreciate your input on the details as well. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Sat, Feb 9, 2013 You should definitely go for the match.com thing! :) Sorry it took me a while to get back to your email. Have you been using it yet? Found any lovely gals, teehee! Oh yeah, so OKCupid has this new app thing called Crazy Blind Date you can download on your iPad or iPhone and it basically sets you up on a blind date with somebody. Don't really know too much of the details. but you should check it out! But hey, I noticed you deleted that eyebrow picture. What's up with that? If you're embarrassed, don't be! Everyone makes mistakes sometimes. So, what's the update on your eyebrow situation? Have you drawn them on? I think that'd work pretty well. If I over pluck my eyebrows, sometimes I just fill in the sparse spots!

Sat, Feb 9, 2013 at 8:00 PM The eyebrow photo; I wanted to make sure you were the only one who saw that. And keep out of the wrong hands. I would believe Clover would lick the eyebrow pencil off; they are growing back fine. I will get back to you about end of the month on discussion of meeting up at Madicon. I will subscribe to Match.com next month when I am able to afford it easier. New topic: do you like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? I have enjoyed the original 1987 shows as they aired. And I am liking the new 2012 show. Only downer for me is April's current season age. In the 1987, she was a 28 year old news reporter; now she is a 16 year old high school student keen on science. From Twenty Eight to Sixteen in over a decade; that is just totally messed up. TTYL Sent from my iPhone

Sat, Feb 9, 2013 at 8:46 PM You can always use sharpie. Some girls use that to draw in eyebrows. But there's plenty of smudge proof eyebrow pencils out there. A lot of girls actually wax their entire eyebrows off and just draw them on everyday. Anyways, you should definitely check out that Crazy Blind Date app. I looked into it a little bit. All you do is pick days and times you're available, then you pick a location for where you want this blind date to happen. People (gals, in your case) can accept and voila, you have a date. It's also vice versa; you can look at a list of girls and where and when they want to meet up and you can accept their's. Apparently OKCupid will scramble your picture so it's like a mystery! :) Eh, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is okay. I watched it with friends when I was a kid. But you're right, they should have kept up with the timeline and made April like 40-some years old! That kind of stuff can be really confusing.

Sun, Feb 10, 2013 at 4:00 PM I see. On the C.B.D. app: on one hand, I am about desperate for meeting new women, But on the other hand, "Jackie" and I met through OKCupid, and "she" turned out Troll/Cyber-Bully; everything that I uploaded for "her" was turned over to my enemy by "her". And as you and I are aware, True Love (online at least) does not consist of such grossly embarrassing acts being uploaded. I still have the mild $9 cake grudge every time I am reminded of that bitch. *deep breath* I will ponder more about the app, as well as shopping for smudge proof eyebrow pencil. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Mon, Feb 11, 2013 at 10:25 PM What's pretty neat about this app is even though you login with your OKCupid account (just so they match you appropriately), you can pick the name you want to go by plus they don't show either party's profiles. You're allowed to message the other person a few hours prior to the actual date time. Other than that, there's no way for the other person to know who you are. :)

Tue, Feb 12, 2013 at 6:02PM Yes. I have downloaded the app, reactivated my OKCupid account from frozen, updated my page with a more current photo and bio, logged in through the app, and I have found a couple of flaws in it. It lets me set the location to meet, but not the TIME. And it only looks up certain places, like for Sunday, I wanted to put in my church, but it would NOT highlight it for selection, even from typing its name. Best I can do with it is select the McD in Ruckersville on the days of the week I intend to make my usual tea/coffee break and walk around Wal-Mart. I hang out here at the McD for like an hour or two, solving the Sudoku puzzle in the Washington Post comics, reading a few of said comics and horoscope, checking my email, checking in with my "Simpsons Tapped Out" game app, and collecting/counting my thoughts. Speaking of which, I did note the one photograph on the damn Cwcki of me hanging here and fiddling one day last Summer, definitely will keep my back to the center wall's inside corner and tunnel my vision forward. Unfortunately, I do have Tunnel Vision, and I am often lost in thought facing downward at the paper or my iPhone. Currently, if I rated the app, I'd give it 2/5 stars. BTW, I have started using an eyebrow pencil, making sure it read on the package, "smudge proof". It does help, and I like the thinner eyebrows, but it does smudge if I end up putting a finger onto my forehead. And I seem to have trouble mirroring one drawn eyebrow on the other one. Madicon: I am thinking of leaving the house at 7 or 8 am, getting breakfast on the way, and estimating about two hours getting there, I am thinking of arriving there at about 10 or 11. I will meet you and [REDACTED] at the check-in desk at 11am. Have you watched the movie, "Eyes Wide Shut"? In reference to my planned costume, cloak/robe in midnight blue, hood will be grey, and my mask full face cover; white with gold around the eyes. Will subscribe to Match.com if Madicon meets doesn't work out. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Tue, Feb 12, 2013 at 8:14 PM Hiya Chris! Good luck with OKCUPID stuff! I'm sure you'll hit a real winner by sticking to your guns and staying with this new method. Since you've begun really taking care of your looks, I can happily say that any broad who bags you is in for a real treat!! Since you've decided to play with your style a bit more (i.e. shaving those wooly bully brows) I thought it'd be a good idea to send you some eyebrow inspiration!! Eyes, after all, are the windows to the soul and you wanna make sure those windows have some choice frames. I've always DREAMED of giving you make up tips. What better time to start then now, when you could use a little pick me up in making the best of an iffy situation? Let's start with some basics, babe! http://24.mediatumblr.com/tumblr/m4o3a3QSrR1r37oyzo1500.jpg Brooke Candy is a fierce, fine, free female that smolders with defined ARCHES in her brows! Check out that powerful stare. This bitch knows what she wants!) Meow. http://jeffbannow.com/film/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/Marlene-Dietrich43.jpg I know you love old Hollywood movies, and this lady had the best brows in the biz for years. Try them on for size sometime! http://images2.fanpop.com/image/polls/502000/502269 1280261841877 full.jpg Bigger CAN be better! Don't be afraid to mix it up a bit and go for the Labyrinth look. 80s beauty Connelly totally snagged Bowie on these fuzzy docks. Now, if you wanna go edgy (and let me tell ya, you SHOULD. you have the cheekbones and personality for it!), I totally recommend these looks: http://li2.listal.com/image14323508/600full-amanda-palmer.jpg This is my FAVORITE GIRLY ROCKER EVER!! Amanda Palmer is just the baddest bitch ever (thats good, okay) and your new Daria 'tude totally reminds me of this bodacious diva. Work it, baby! Feminista~ http://I3.bp.blogspot.com/-OmHA617OERUIT6plB037Oml/AAAAAAAAApc/qsz-O2HBFdc/s1600/behindthezine3.png Now, I don't know about you but Jem is totally my favorite cartoon lady and this look here is truly, truly outrageously AMAZING. Definitely mix up the colors and express yourself sometime! I'd love to see the battery blue on you. Okay, I hope these photos give you the inspiration you need to really get out there, and turn that mistake into a signature stare! You've got it, Chris! Not you just need to put on the finishing touches and flaunt it. 18trgator! PS: Don't forget to snap some glamor shots of you testing out these new looks! Don't be greedy, share with me. =D bffs!

Wed, Feb 13, 2013 at 6:22 PM I will further consider the eyebrow options you've shared with me, and I will look at other eyebrows on women as well. Britney Spears, Katy Perry, Vanessa Hudgens, Lucille Ball, even all of the featured women in "Eyes Wide Shut", including Nicole Kidman. Among the photos, I felt most shocked, and least attracted to, Amanda Palmer's eyebrows; too freaky eyebrow design, and her face was just scary. Wow. I would have never guessed you for a Jem fan. I have checked out a few episodes when they were aired on the Hub; it is a good show, but I had a busy schedule that kept me from really getting into it, and was more into MLP at the time too. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler image.jpeg 2316K

Wed, Feb 13, 2013 at 7:28PM They are looking good! :D Definitely look at other eyebrows to get some inspiration to give them some personality! Try different arches for them, different widths, designs, or whatever! Even colors. Eyebrows really define a person and their face. They're also a reflection to who a person is. Don't be afraid to experiment! How's your OKCupid thing coming along BTW.? I took a look at your profile and it definitely speaks volumes about your character. I bet you're beating the ladies off left and right. :)

Thu, Feb 14, 2013 at 4:21 AM Meh, not really beating down my door. Let me change the topic, my mother and I are considering selling the thousands of records from my father's collection to make money to pay our debts. Do you know of any record collectors or dealers who would pay top dollar around here? Also, I would appreciate some advice towards getting started on selling them. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Sat, Mar 2, 2013 at 12:37 PM Just checking in. I am still on for the Saturday at Madicon. Just a reminder, I will meet you and [REDACTED] at the check-in desk area at about 10 or 11 am. Look for me in a whole face white mask with a gold eye mask on it, midnight blue robe and grey hood. Plus, one color update; I went back to being a brunette. Blonde was not working out as well as I had hoped months ago. My hair is still long and growing. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Sat, Mar 2, 2013 at 12:50 PM Yes, I understand it is in the convention center in James Madison University; I was referring to the check-in desk for the convention there as to where to meet. Blonde was not attracting any more attention than brunette was, so I feel more preference to resume my natural color and stay that way. Thank you for the compliment and suggestions. It is good to know that email will get to you nearly as fast as texting, which I am still having difficulties with. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Sun, Mar 3, 2013 at 7:17 PM Hey Chris! Wow, your new look is pretty kewl. I don't know how you manage to hang out in public without the ladies dogging you. Oh, one thing I was wondering... I've been looking at your facebook posts recently. They all seem to be from your phone or from twitter or something. Do you still have internet at home? Or do you rely on your phone for your internet connection? Just curious. You excited for madicon? It's gonna be a lot of fun~

Mon, Mar 4, 2013 at 12:07 PM The only answers I can give for "why don't I have women coming to me" I can think of are... -I am Publically Invisible. -My Trolled Internet (un)popularity gives me an unrequited smeared, horrible, crappy name. -Charlottesville, VA has become an ill-social/antisocial city occupied with paranoid people. -(Here's a new one) Charlottesville has become as or worse Autistic than me. -I do not know what it has been about me that is either repelling or frightening to other people, but they have been either or both of me. -Everyone is SOOOOOOOO busy with their lives to give a penny or a fuck to someone like me. -I have been constantly overlooked. I continue to maintain Internet Wi-Fi connection through my cable company at home. My phone is a convenient way to swiftly connect to Facebook for a brief update. I feel timidly nervous about Madicon, and I am keeping my expectations for what happens there low. I plan on bringing you the Skylander Figures I have been hanging onto for you since December. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Mon, Mar 4, 2013 at 9:39PM Hmm, well, unless something has changed since the last time I saw you, I'm pretty sure you're not invisible. :) No one I've talked to in Charlottesville knows anything about you, so I don't think your internet reputation is what's keeping the ladies away. As far as Charlottesville being autistic or anti-social, in my experience, while there are some autistics in Charlottesville, they're very rare. Doesn't seem like a related issue. I would imagine a lot of people in Charlottesville would give a penny to you. Have you been asking for pennies? Because if you haven't asked, they wouldn't know you need any. I'm not sure what you mean by a "fuck," but that would be worth a lot more, if what I'm thinking of is accurate. So, I don't blame them for not giving you "fucks" or whatever you're talking about. I don't think you're getting overlooked, because you get a lot of pictures taken of you. It's like you're famous among paparazzi! The only answer I can't figure out is the one about you being repelling or frightening. That's a tricky one. Maybe you could ask your stylist about it?

Fri, Mar 8, 2013 at 10:10 AM It's one day I before go to Madicon. I am still feeling nervous and timid. That's all; I will see y'all tomorrow.

Sat, Mar 9, 2013 at 6:40 PM I have learned and realized a lot in the online comic panel. I will email you again later. I am heading out and back home now. Tell your gals it was nice to meet them both. I remember them both, but I am having trouble remembering a name. Was her name [REDACTED], or please type it out for me? I like her. TTYL Stay Safe, Christian.

Sat, Mar 9, 2013 at 9:12 PM Sorry, my phone battery died, plus my signal kept cutting out. I tried finding you and saw you down one of the halls and called out to you but you didn't hear then I couldn't find you! :( Oh well, I hope you enjoyed yourselves. My friends spent the last bit of the time we were there playing hide and seek, lol! Anyways, the friend you're thinking of her name is [REDACTED], but she already has a boyfriend.

Sun, Mar 10, 2013 at 4:06 PM I did enjoy myself, and yesterday was a really good day; the best one I have had in a long time. :) During the webcomic panel, I learned thinking ahead in the comic pages tips and details that I seriously should have understood over a decade ago. I was not ready for the webcomic game then. I made a public post on my Facebook about it that I pray will reduce the online and telephone pestering. Thank you so much for inviting me to Madicon, [REDACTED]. On the flipside and current topic, I had just learned last night from a random check on the Troll forum about "Failosophy" and their highlighting a photo of myself that was Trolled from me by Jacklyn the years ago. *Spoiler Alert*. Jamie Lee would not date me, and she would jail me over the "ugly couch". The episode is online at MTV.com, and it is available for sale in SD and HD on iTunes. I am feeling really pissed off about this. I have alerted Rob Bell about it, and pray that Suing MTV or the "Failosophy" cast is a doable option. Nobody asked for my permission or made me sign a waiver. I am feeling in between the good of my day yesterday, and the bad of Failosophy, so I am off and on on feeling good and bad right now. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Mon, Mar 11, 2013 at 11:52 PM Well that really stinks that they used one of your photos for your show. I think it's rather flattering somebody said they would marry you! What has Rob Bell said to you about the situation yet? I'm under the impression that if a photo is found publicly on the internet then it's fair game. Who knows, but that's kind of tricky. Anyways, good luck with that! Beside that, how have you been? I'm really glad you had fun at Madicon! :) It makes me happy that you finally had a day to relax and be in a more social setting. Maybe next year you can aim for Magfest. The panels and people are 100% better and bet you would learn a lot from the panels Magfest has to offer. Either way, I'm glad you could make it to Madicon.

Tue, Mar 12, 2013 at 1:59 AM Yes, I agree the photo is definitely one of my better ones, among all of the rest similarly nude pics and videos. :( The White MALE was the one who used the word "marriage". UGH! And worse, the woman would not only Not Date me, but have me thrown in jail over a couch that my Aunt Harriet gave to me years ago. And not only is it a couch, but it is also a fold-out bed. I have not yet heard a reply from Rob, but I will call him later today, and let him know about the emails, since there is the chance he was too busy to check. And there is a small, possible light towards a resolution. I have found contact with the host of "Failosophy", Hasan Minhaj, on facebook, from the "Failosophy" page's about section. http://ww.facebook.com/pages/Hasan-Minhaj/41284651271 I have contacted Hasan with the following: Hello. I was just made aware of your show on MTV, "Failosophy", when I had heard that a photograph, that I had taken myself, for a woman, fell into the possession of Internet Trolls/Cyber-Bullies, was featured and mocked on your show in the fourth episode alongside two old men with bacon and plushies. I have already been trolled and bullied for over five difficult years. What you are doing on your show is Promoting Trolling, and Trolling is Bullying. Not a lot of people take kindly to Bullying, and I do not take kindly to Trolling. Tell your crew and crap-filled producers that for Promoting Trolling, you all will Pay unto everyone you have further emotionally damaged and embarrassed on television. I am not a fan of "Failosophy", and I despise your kind of people continuing to Troll for the LULZ. Sincerely, Christian Weston Chandler, Ruckersville, VA, USA. He swiftly replied: Thank for being in touch. That wasn't my intention at all. I agree that trolling is just a digital form of bullying. I was told that all the photos on the show have been signed off as ok to be used on air from the original owners/people who took the photos. I'm only ok with doing these jokes as long as the people who took them are in on the joke as well. If that didn't happen with your photo I am truly very sorry. Please accept my apology because that wasn't my intention at all. If there's anything I can do please let me know. Best, Hasan I then replied requesting his more direct contact info, offering my email address and iPhone number, and that I would think it over and consult with my people (Rob Bell). I sincerely think there is a chance of a legal lawsuit, with a settlement. But those details are being discussed between me and Rob at the moment. But according to Hassan's reply, the photos do need to be signed off as ok for airing, FROM the Original Owners/People who Took Them. I took the photo myself, and was not informed beforehand, so chances should be fair to good. I just have to wait and see what Rob says. TTYL Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler.

Wed, Aug 28, 2013 at 9:52 PM So there's going to be a convention in Charlottesville next month! It's called Omegacon. http://omegaconvention.com/ It looks like it's going to be pretty fun! Especially since you enjoyed Madicon, I figured you'd appreciate this. And it's in town too!

Sat, Aug 31, 2013 at 4:25 PM I have been considering the convention: I am not going to make any promises at the moment. Finances have been tough on me and mom the past month. I do appreciate that it is in town, and that it is an opportunity to meet people in person. I have been working hard and successfully the past month to renew and make new friends/acquaintances from my graduating class. I do feel better about myself and more self confident, and I have found past energy that has sparked my Sonichu inspiration, in finding the same energy of my past self who handed out compliments as often as greetings. I still feel intimidated when out in public to even speak much. I am feeling better at communicating through Facebook, especially with the friends Sub-list feature that successfully has stayed safe from Troll eyes. Not counting the digital flyer image; they found that through Brandi Cooper's page, set to "friends Only". Not her fault; a lot of my classmates are not as online cautious as have become. I feel it better for me to continue checking off the roster and looking up as many out of everyone as I am able on Facebook. I may end up hooking up with one who may still be single and closest to my age without going over. Now that's "The Price is Right". LOL I will let you know if I can afford to make the convention. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Sat, Aug 31, 2013 at 7:21 PM What does it really matter if a girl you like is over your age? Especially if you're talking about a girl from your graduating class; the age of everyone in your class is within a year, that's trivial. And you were born in late february, so you're probably within the younger 50% of your class. What if you meet the perfect girl for you, but it turns out she was born in January? Are you just going to say she's too old and forget about her? But I digress...I really hope you can go to the convention. I would just hate for you to miss an opportunity to go out and be social! It makes me sad that you're sad and lonely. :( You had so much fun at Madicon, lol!

Used Porn for Sale

Mon. Dec 16, 2013 at 5:58AM I am listing my lot of pronographic DVDs on Craigslist for sale (54 in all), for $1,000 cash; no special prices, bartering or haggling accepted. Anyway, I felt it good to offer you and Philip first crack at the bunch, for the obvious reasons. The lot includes the following titles: Hentai: Love Lessons 1 and 2, Love Doll 1 and 2, Anime Fiction 1 and 2, Sailor and the Seven Balls 1 and 2, Desperate Carnal Housewives 1. Vintage XXX Cartoons (featuring little Annie and the Phallum), Pure Love2, Fruits Cup From Adam & Eve: The Edge, Black Safari: Legend has it, XXX pleasure Seekers, Wicked Now and Wicked Classic, Titanium 5 star Video Collection, Rawhide (2 disc set), Jenna's Private Parts, The Best of Amateur Angels, Amateure Angels 5, The Perfect Secretary, Carmen & Friends, Build Your Own Collection, Extreme Behavior 2, Nina Hartley's Guide to Sex Toys Educational from Sinclair institute and Alexander Institute Spearmint Rhino: 101 Advanced Sexual Positions. Sexplorations Wols 1, 2, 3 DVD and Music CD Set, Creative Positions For Lowers: Beyond the Bedroom. Sexual Positions for lowers: Beyond the Missionary Position, Kama Sutra: Sensual Secrets to Amazing Sex 1, Sex: A Lifelong Pleasure: Satisfying Heil Him Wol 1 and 2. Erotic Seduction, More of What Women Want, New Erotic Seduction, The Art of Erotic Dancing, Sexual Satisfaction, Sexual Healing. Sexual Fitness Other: Playboy Girls of Reality TV, Playboy's Girlfriends, Sex Trivia, pleasure principle, Sweet Young Things 1.2 and 3. Latin Sinsations, Pamm & Tommy Lee: Hardcore and Uncerts ored. On Top of Of Woody, Teen Models 1, Just Vagina, Cal Wash Girls. Angelina Aimani Statlets. Kagney Linn Karter: Superhero Sex Therapist Please reply and let me know if y'all are interested. Stay Safe and well,

Thu, Dec 19, 2013 at 5:43 PM Lol, Chris. I have most of them got for free for downloading them.

Fri, Dec 20, 2013 at 2:49PM Of course, Why would I bother offering you something that in return can help turn my mother's financial troubles around. when you can get a online porn video site subscription and just pay per View. I am having rough emotional times that have steeled my heart. Ugh. Sert from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Fri, Dec 20, 2013 at 4:05 PM I would be careful about selling used porn because people are probably worried it's covered in your jizz.

Fri, Dec 20, 2013 at 7:41 PM They are not, and that is not funny. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Fri, Dec 20. 2013 at 10:29 pm I'm being serious. Porn and sex related things can be questionable used.

Sat. Dec 21, 2013 at 7:21 PM Hey Chris, I know you're having money troubles, but $1,000 is really a lot of money to ask for a box of used porn, and even if I thought it was a good deal I don't have that kind of money. Maybe it's time for you to talk to the people at Region 10, and of your probation officer, about getting job placement. they both have programs set up to get jobs for people like you, and they do it all the time for people who have worse autism than you or other disabilities they can find jobs where you don't have to deal with a lot of people that you don't know, and they won't care about google results on you because those jobs exist to help people just like you. I know you applied at McDonalds once like three years ago and didn't get it, but there isn't a single person who gets every job they apply for, You don't have a lot of options because even though your friends care about you, they simply can't take care of your problems for you. These people can help you not only get a job you can handle, but they can also help you deal with your spending addiction, Let me know how it turns out.

Chris fucks himself

Sat, Apr 19, 2014 at 11:04 PM A new feat I have just randomly done something that would normally be useless and trivial, and it would be something that would be more often done in a dream. But I actually did it, and I felt like I wanted to tell someone who would keep it confidential and possibly be interested. Right now, I am telling only you in confidence. Warning: it is obscene, and I mean no offense. I have reached from behind and under and pulled my penis and literally stretched it to being wedged between the middle of my butt crack; I could push the head into the hole. But it was really smelly there, and I have just bathed. And while stretched, the balls can remain tucked in. And I Can walk like this. IT IS THAT LONG. And to take a cocky opportunity: You, and a LOT of women around here and wherever, not counting the Cherokee woman, are really missing out. Thank you for listening and keeping it confidential... On second thought, I give you permission to only tell other Women about it, only if you feel it valid for the conversation. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Sat, Apr 19, 2014 at 11:40 PM Well if you think girls are missing out, that's all the more reason you should be asking some out on dates. Why would you want to walk around with your penis like that though? What is the point of doing this? But good for you. :)

Positives and Negatives about myself

Tue, May 6, 2014 at 7:49 AM Meh, whatever. In Between (don't know which column to put it under): Tomgirl Lesbian identified Male Was likely a Lesbian (Woman) in past life (and the ugly growth and the Autism are my punishment of that past life; I reasonably firmly believe that theory) Tranny Will wear dresses and pretty outfits Will wear makeup Looks good in dresses and skirts Wears sports bras Wears panties Offended easily by topless male nudity. Ugh. Positive: Genuinely empathetic and emotional and caring and compassionate Creative Imaginative Artistic Intelligent Graduated with good to high grades in High School and College Likes lesbians Cool with bisexuals Cool with trannies of all kinds (but would never date any who have had the gender change operation, as well as males) I believe rainbows are the symbol for Unity (REALLY hate the damn gay males for taking a rainbow and destroying its original beauty in the name of their ways. It pisses me off! UGH!!!) My dogs, cat and mother love and care about me Negative: Often blank in the mind Sometimes retarded Autism Lack of self-esteem Terrible internet reputation A LOT of things are MY fault (between what I was trolled into recording and uploading, shaming myself and my parents, other mistakes and errors). Eventually leading to my father shouting into my face, "GOD DAMMIT, CHRISTIAN!!!", which was recorded onto one of said uploaded videos. Mental Problems Bad choice impulses Paranoid Impervious to impressions of me I get from others My soul has been greatly damaged over and over (never said I lost it, in regards to your last email) My heart has been hurt nearly as much and has become more fragile I feel like I am losing my mind My self image is not good My face is wrong I am still very shy Nobody talks to me when I am out (not counting the cashiers, which their talk is company-regulated mandatory and considered mostly false or something) I come off as some sort of a scary person to other people My best gal-pals from my past have turned against me or left me for dead in ignoring Nobody will hire me for work Hates more than 99% of the male population Hates gay males (no personal disrespect to your relations) Can get pissed off Trash talk when really offended and stressed Often takes what is said literally (teasing me REALLY bothers me) Tend to get emotionally carried away on a hot topic of mine Past is past, and can't really get into the modern present Online socializing is Not one of my things I just Can Not associate well online. Fucking Facebook; Damn Trolls and Bullies. Freakin' Anons. All hiding and pretending to be good people when in reality will take your input and turn it all and everything else you put online against you in the name of their hate for hate's sake. Damn It All!!! Feel free to add onto the lists from your perspective. Stay Safe with Peace, Christian W. Chandler (sent from my iPod) P.S. By the way, your friend, [REDACTED], and her mother; yeah, they REALLY made a difference in my life... Downhill difference.

Tue, May 6, 2014 at 10:41 AM See! You have some wonderful traits! Now the next step is to destroy your negative traits in whatever fashion you deem appropriate. Those aren't who you truly are and shouldn't guide your life. While they'll still be there your positive traits should outshine them and help make you the best person you can possibly be. I seemed kind of offended about your "quirky hobbies" compliment. Trust me when I say that having different hobbies is a lot more interesting to other people than your typical "like to read" or "like to go for walks on the beach." Now that you have your positive list all you have to do is make sentences with them and that'll be the backbone and first step to your dating site. :) Oh yeah, please don't talk trash about [REDACTED]. She had a big fight with her mom a few months ago and ran away from home. I haven't heard from her since.

Tue, May 6, 2014 at 11:04 PM I can't get rid of my negative traits; the obvious truth is that there are more bad than good, as well as the middle/indifferent (although Tomgirl may be a positive trait, so would tranny if it wasn't opposed by some people). The items in the negative are those not only how I feel was such, but also from the perception of others. I have the rights to my own feelings, and I am going to feel however I am feeling at the moment. Additionally for the positives, strong (can you lift a heavy box of records for a distance with your own bare hands?), having my own opinions and honest can be added. Anyway, I will have some sentences with those things later. I fear uncovering a bad memory from recalling a positive, and it stung me some when I added onto the positive list earlier.

Tue, May 6, 2014 at 11:14 PM What bad memory came up? Remembering hurtful memories isn't necessarily bad. They help us understand why we feel and act a certain way, which makes it a lot easier to heal from the pain. If you bury and ignore them then we don't grow as a person. The reason I asked you to "destroy" the negative is to help you understand that your negative traits aren't who make you who you are. It's to also help throw away some of the pent up negative energy you've been feeling. I will say that for your sake, I suggest not bringing up your hatred of gays to others, especially girls you're interested in dating. They're going to think it's disrespectful and ugly that you consider the rainbow as a symbol of unity, despite completely disregarding an entire group of people. It's just going to make you look the same as the trolls that hate you. If you have ugly or mean thoughts, write those down then throw them away(this is actually an exercise that a lot of psychologists recommend going). You don't need to have any bad vibes or negativity from here on out. You're in charge of your life and your emotions. You're a grown man and you're not going to take anymore shit from life. :)

OkCupid and Impotent Rage

Mon, May 12, 2014 at 5:25 PM I have been getting "Technical Difficulties" responses to my trials today; have you tried anything since the last email? Should a password reset be advised, please go ahead and initiate it, and I will receive the link and make it happen. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Mon, May 12, 2014 at 11:16 PM Try resetting the password.

Mon, May 12, 2014 at 11:21 PM It won't let me reset; it gives me an "internal error" message upon clicking "submit" with the filled email address form.

Mon, May 12, 2014 at 11:21 PM Er, so I decided to do some research. Apparently the "technical difficulties" thing is a nice way of banning people. Did you send anything to anyone that could have scared them into flagging you? I would email OKCupid and try and resolve it with them.

Mon, May 12, 2014 at 11:23 PM I have not sent anything out; you have sent all of the messages from the account so far. Plus at this point, you have put in the security info in the setup. Please try to straighten it out.

Mon, May 12, 2014 at 11:25 PM I didn't put any security info (it didn't ask for any). Plus, it's the email you linked with it that they'll probably want to email you through.

Mon, May 12, 2014 at 11:30 PM I've just found the feedback form through using the Safari browser on my phone; will let you know results.

Mon, May 12, 2014 at 11:42 PM I can't make it work; it wants a code to prove myself human, but the random code is not displayed nor is there a text field to type it in on the Mobile version of the OKCupid site. And I am getting bupkis on the Full Site version as well. I pasted what I typed into the message field on the Feedback form, as well as my yahoo address; please see if you are able to send the feedback on your end for me. volcanoinsuranceidiot@yahoo.com I have been having difficulties logging into my freshly created account lately. To my understanding, I may be unreasonably blocked out/banned. I have not sent any offensive messages, and I have not intentionally meant anything offensive. I would appreciate my account to be unbanned, as well as being able to log back in. Please reply.

Tue, May 13, 2014 at 10:32AM I've just found my way to sending the feedback through Safari. We should have a backup plan; another dating site or another OKCupid profile, I guess. And I believe we should take the introverted perception of "Being flagged for banning" as a response to ANYTHING under consideration. I also fear the Trolls finding the profile and getting the account banned again. Those damn fools just want to cause more trouble and devastation.

Wed, May 21, 2014 at 4:37 AM Have you started on the new account yet? And on further thought, please make up a temporary email account for the initial set up, unless you are able to go in and delete the account currently linked to my yahoo address somehow. Also, I feel I must admit that I am jealous of [REDACTED]; he was able to charm you into his arms and all. Yet, you and I have established a sort of fair back and forth between us, but I do understand your previously expressed feelings towards me (granted not in a positive light on my part). It is difficult for me to believe in myself being any positive sort of special after years of derogative input from in person from Megan, Snyder, Mimms, Walsh, the bunch of damn Jerkops, and online from all of the damn trolls. My autism and OCD does not help me much either. Everyone ignoring or overlooking me in public. Lack of Peer (Gal Pal and of better mental ability than I) Friends to hang out with on a regular basis. ..... Yeah.

Wed, May 21, 2014 at 4:13 PM I have not started working on your OKCupid profile again, because work has been busy. You shouldn't be jealous of [REDACTED], because let me be honest with you. Even if I was single, I wouldn't date you because we don't have enough in common for you to be my partner. You're pretty much not my type. Other than that, let me see if I can address all the emails you sent me. I suggest maybe practice not bringing up being autistic as much. 1) I can't help you with that. That's what therapists are for. 2) It's not who are you. It's something you have, but it doesn't make your entire being. Plus, girls will probably be put off by it if you keep mentioning you're autistic, because then they're going to think you're more retarded than you really are. People are ignoring you in public because you go to places like Target. I've already mentioned in a previous email that people are there to shop, not try and make friends. I certainly don't care about the people around me when I'm just trying to buy bleach. And if you reread my previous email, I even suggested a place like the Tea House and even that special people's group on Craigslist. I apologize if it's not ideal, but beggars can't be choosers. At this point, you're shooting yourself in the foot if you don't put forth the effort. And even if it doesn't work or fails, at least you can say you tried. It looks poorly on your part and just makes you look like a slacker. Now lets rewind a little bit. What did you do again that warranted getting banned from WalMart? Either way, why do you need to be unbanned from WalMart? And I didn't realize you got banned from the mall again...? I need some clarification on both those situations before I can try and help you with anything. You should also stop badmouthing cops and generalizing them. Yes, there are SOME bad cops, but they're ultimately good. Unfortunately, it's the few bad ones that make them all look corrupted. That would be like if say, an autistic person pushed me down the stairs and started saying all autistics are evil, corrupted scum. Also, it isn't cute to a girl if you start going on and badmouthing people. It's time to stop blaming everyone else around you. You're the only one in control with you life. P.S. Did you do the little activity I suggested? :)

Wed, May 21, 2014 at 7:16 PM Firstly, on the "fun activity", with putting my frustrations out on past item(s), I had thought about that: Just about everything that I received from Megan Schroeder either got lost in the fire or they are in box(es) somewhere, and I have less feelings towards her now anyway. And I already put a lot of frustrations against Snyder, Walsh and Mimms into my lego minifigure remakes of them with torture in a plastic canister shaking, spinning them around and around on a lego water wheel, stomping on them, and stuffing them into my sock and waking around with them to get a stink of feet. So the obvious next opposers were the damn Jerkops, so I defaced "POLICE" decals on the car and the Police Station rebuilt for my city-to-be-rebuilt. And to THINK I felt it a requirement for a Police/Jerkop Station back them; I used to crave for one, because I did not have one for years (I sooner got a Fire Station, which I have more respect towards the rescue people, and a Hospital). But now I hate all of those bastards, and spit on the ground they walk and drive on, as well as their vehicles. Second, to quote the damn Cwcki, "On 28 April, Chris released a Facebook message stating that, on the 25th of April, he had received the ban-hammer for getting angry in the" (Fashion Square) "mall when he answered some calls from the trolls." And, "Chris was banned from the Ruckersville Wal-Mart in September 2013 after vandalising an Xbox One sign to read "HEXbox One" with a permanent marker." And on both occasions, I was feeling deepest in emotional devastation and depression from the usual loneliness and all that. The OKCupid profile is back up; just forwarded the reply from my yahoo mailbox. And, I do recall you informing me about nothing in common, not being your type, etc. All past events and things under consideration, I feel like there were details that were left out that makes me feel like I did not get the chance from you to perform. Like a traditional date, or, yeah, and I mean no offense, sexual performance. I feel inadequate from not being able to prove myself a good person on a date and all that. Hell, how do you know for sure my personality type, minus the depression, would not work for you? Ugh, I gave myself a rise in blood pressure; not comfortable. I did not want to leave the email on the bad note. I still care, like and respect you as a woman, person and friend. Stay Safe with Peace, Christian W. Chandler (sent from my iPod)

Wed, May 21, 2014 at 8:45 PM Well, I hope you taking out your anger on inanimate objects has put aside your anger. Being angry does you no good, because whether you realize it or not, it reflects on your outer appearance as well (which may be why you think your face is scary looking). And like I mentioned previously, it's not going to be cute to a girl if you hold these huge grudges, especially the police since you're generalizing an entire group of people whom you do not know personally. Please refer to my last email to the example attached to it. Chris, despite loathing the CWCki, you've quoted them multiple times. You've even told people to go look at the page, but not to take it seriously. People, me included, would rather hear what you have to think and recall personally from you, not from a website that was made to defame you. Well, Chris, I know you pretty well. We've been friends for a while. You're not as ambitious as I am, you have polar opposite views on things that are important to me, your hobbies are vastly different from mine; you like to play with Legos and toys, I like going to the gym and working out. Being a little different is okay in a relationship, but it has been proven multiple times you're going to be more compatible with those that share the same values and views. Plus it would definitely be a no go for me to be with you because you don't have a job. I don't plan on footing the bills in a relationship. Don't get me wrong, it works with some people, but that's not what I want from a relationship. I hope I clarified everything for you. Just because I'm not interested doesn't mean there's nobody else out there is isn't. You can't expect to appeal to every single woman.

Thu, May 22, 2014 at 12:50AM Among the women you've picked and messaged on my behalf on OKCupid, I like one of them. I want to remessage her, but I am freezing up at the message typing screen. And I've read her profile info. And she won't initially respond to "how are you" and the :) emoticons. Would you take a moment and come up with a new message and send it to her, please? Also, no one else has replied, nor anyone else has messaged me.

OKcupid - She's overweight and unappealing

Sat, May 24, 2014 at 11:24 PM I have noticed your input to a woman in Rustburg. As much as it is appreciated, Rustburg is too far from here, she is only a 71% match, and she is quite overweight to the point of (no offense) being too much and unappealing. I will allow the communication with her be up to you in words you see fit. I have been answering more questions on the website for better matching. I am at 90% or so with more than two of the women contacted initially early on, including the GameStop employee who works on weekends; her I like some. I like her face. I am waiting her response to my invitation for being better acquainted over coffee and conversation. I am keeping my mind open for other women of great match up, until I hand fully made up my mind, and my meetings will be one at a time. I would not extend another invite for meet while the first is still pending. Also, in response to how others may initially think me as a sexual predator, I am as likely to think them as Internet Troll/Cyber-Bully who would record the conversation and upload it onto the damn Cwcki, but you did pick the women I sent a second message to recently after reading their profiles and answering the unanswered questions they had already answered, and I trust your judgment well over my own in the situation. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Sat, May 24, 2014 at 11:42 PM Chris, you shouldn't turn people down because of appearance, when you're not a skinny minnie yourself. Keep your mind open and a lot more doors will open for you. Chris, you're afraid of people from the internet. It's only fair that a woman would be wary as well. It doesn't mean she's a troll or anything. A woman doesn't owe you anything so don't expect that they HAVE to meet you on your terms. Keep that in mind and you'll be mute successful. :)

Sun, May 25, 2014 at 4:20 AM Firstly, minor detail: "mute successful"? Second, I took your first paragraph as an inclination towards the simplified, "You're Fat". I am NOT fat, and I am not attracted to fat people. So please do not pair me up with the obese, and please do not inkling towards calling me fat or overweight. I feel compelled to tell the short story I made up just now, based on the Lego Ice Cream Truck set; the Fitness Fanatic included is You. She says, "Ooh. I am a fitness fanatic. I insult everyone else who is even a millimeter wider than am. I came with an Ice Cream Truck, so I will stop and eat all the ice cream I want. Nom nom nom. Wow, I am soo trim like a beach ball." Scene: interior: her home. "Philip, I'm home", she says as she rolls in through the door. Phillip approaches and greets her. "Hey... WOAH! Wow." Then he thinks, "I could get easily crushed under that." Then he says to her, "Okay, bye now." Then he cartwheels out the door with a la-lala-lala-lala. Then she groans sadly. "Everyone else is fatter than me," she disillusions herself into believing at that moment. End. Point is: I am still losing weight; I am less than 200 lbs now; please do not associate me with being fat. I sincerely apologize if I have caused any stirs of emotion in you. But I felt I needed to make the point clear as I could, as well as relay how insulted I felt with the recent association.

Sun, May 25, 2014 at 8:42 Chris, I don't make fun of people who are "wider" than me and I'm certainly not a "fitness fanatic." I take care of how I look, simple as that. But you're not skinny or fit yourself, even if you're under 200 pounds. So I don't think it's fair to be turning down women you deem "too big." She's not even that big so I don't see the problem. It seems you're the one who's insulting people "wider" than you. All I'm saying is that considering you've been having issues with girls noticing you, you shouldn't be closed minded. You're only shooting yourself in the foot if you do that.

Sun, May 25, 2014 at 8:46 AM I've thought about it, and since you know how to get women better than me I'm going to let you do your own thing. You don't need my help anymore.

Sun, May 25, 2014 at 7:28 PM I highly disagree; I still feel I need your support; I do not know everything. And I still have my miserable, agonizing mental blank-outs and freezes. Please do not quit on me. I may have a closed mind upon a relationship with the really big women, but also she is located too far away from me. I have checked on Mapquest the distance relation. And I feel more beneficial with those closer to here like Charlottesville, Ruckersville or Standardsville to name a few closest areas. Also, look at the three I've message; clearly not the stereotypical thin, but they are close, and I see their body types as average, and well attractive. Sent from my iPhone Stay Safe, Christian W. Chandler

Sun, May 25, 2014 at 7:51 PM If her being too far away is the issue, that's one thing. But you're shooting her down because she's "too big." If you read her message and profile, she has been working out and going out for jogs to get healthier. I would not call her a "really big woman." Chris, you've just about shot down or criticized everything I've suggested to you. Either be open to what I'm doing or suggesting to you or you can fly solo. I'm not sure how I can put it, so I'll be blunt. You're a person who's not going to have his pick of the litter when it comes to women. If that was the case, you wouldn't need my help. It's not all about the appearance either. You don't have a job and much money. You have a hobby that can easily be seen as childish. Look, even guys who are bombshell sexy have a difficult time keeping a woman around if they don't have a job. You have to really sell what you have, which is going to be difficult for you. So that's why I keep saying you need to keep your options open, even to women who "are big." She could have a charming personality. And when I complimented her on her sunglasses and asked her about the weather, she was willing to respond. You don't even necessarily have to be romantically interested in her. You can just be friends, which can help with your self-esteem and shyness. Don't shoot yourself in the foot.

Sun, May 25, 2014 at 9:00 PM She can be a friend, and I will contemplate further about the topic. Also, please do not use the phrase "Shoot yourself in the foot"; you sound like my father who said the same phrase to me too a number of times. I am well aware of how many times in my life I have shot myself in the foot, including the uncountable numbers in everything that happened between late 07 and 11. I miss my father... every day. Joke time: I shot myself in the foot so many times, it not only has become numb, but I had to have it replaced with a steel foot. (Not for real, but may as well have). Stay Safe with Peace, Christian W. Chandler

Sun, May 25, 2014 at 9:12PM I only say that phrase because it seems like you don't take me seriously. It doesn't hurt to just make friends over OKCupid. A lot of women on there aren't only looking for somebody romantically. I also feel that you saying "contemplate further about the topic" is just an out to get me to stop pushing it. Like I said, if you're not going to take my suggestions (like all the other suggestions I've given you that you've failed to do anything with), then I'm just wasting my time. I can only help you if you accept the help that's given. I haven't demanded anything that requires an extraordinary amount of effort on your part or anything that is dangerous. Frankly, it just makes you look lazy and that frustrates me because you'll never get a woman with that kind of attitude.

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