Vivian Gee E-mails, 2010

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This page lists emails exchanged between Chris and Vivian Gee during 2010.

They mostly consist of Vivian trying to sort out Chris's finances, force him to release Sonichu comics on schedule, and generally act like a proper human being. Unsurprisingly, he doesn't, and Vivian gives up.


2 January

WHY are you going on with that stupid FAKE HEX-BOX GAME? Or, if you do wish to continue on, I wish for a COPY of that disc for myself, Please, so I can take it to a GameStop and check it out for myself on their

Console Station.

Also, in response to your recent letters I have received:

-I have no plans on selling my consoles, but I do have big plans on Saving. Plus, mostly when I eat out, it's with my mom and dad, and they foot those bills then. Just to let you know.
-And I had no idea about that with the Coca Cola company. And with that, I am addressing the issue that has the Cwcipedia down for the time by accepting the responsibility of the discussions with the Coca Cola Company, apologizing and all that. I have informed the SysOp of that, and I have uploaded my statement onto my YouTube. I am still awaiting the e-mail(s) about that.

Love and Peace,
Christian C.

You must have SOMETHING you don't use to sell. There's so much shit you have. Like old games, old consoles, old toys, old ANYTHING. Pay off your debt faster so interest doesn't rape you up the ass.

And I didn't make the game. Someone else did and I have no idea where they went. They told me to post the videos. So yeah, I dunno anything about the game at this point.

I agree with you. Anyway, can you still make a copy of that game disc for me, or can you at least tell me the name(s) of the person/people who put it together? I am intrigued with their "Beta" Disc and its contents.

Also, I still wait for a response from Coca Cola or the SysOp. I GET IT; I SCREWED UP, but I had good reasons behind it; I was SICK and TIRED of the MISLABELINGS, Jack's Ads, AND even the Letters of the gay men TALKING TO ME VERY STUPIDLY. >:(


I still accept full responsibility of my actions.

Stay Safe,
Christian C.

I broke off with them months ago. I don't even know their real names.

You know how many mixed signals you give off about your sexuality?

Let me list 10: 1. Dildos/vibrator, yes we know you got them as gifts, but WHY WOULD YOU GET THEM AS GIFTS IF YOU WEREN'T ORDERING GAY PRODUCTS. Think about it. Order straight products: get straight gifts. Order gay products: get gay gifts. Think about it.
2. My Little Ponies. For girls.
3. Drinking semen. Pretty gay.
4. Having random images of penises get into your head.[1] Pretty gay.
5. Watching Sailor Moon. For girls.
6. Axe. It doesn't work. That stuff fuckin' sucks. It's for men who want to pretend to be men.
7. Britney Spears. For girls and gay men.
8. You sang I Love the Nightlife, a gay/lesbian pride song.
9. Sex and the City[2]. For girls and gay men.
10. No male friends, just gal-pals who you never went any further 0th base.

there, 10 things I could think of. It's no fucking wonder other people get confused.

Anyway, when the Cwcipedia gets back up (hopefully), you better have like 10 pages done. And since I guess you don't have to do any mailbags during the interim, just do something. You said you could play the harmonica. Then do it.

also, you didn't comment about the selling of your old stuff. you should.

I see. Well, let me address your signals accordingly,

1. The website is; they give you a Free Random Gift with a purchase of $17 or more; RANDOM. I have ordered ONLY Woman Love Dolls and DVDs from there. It doesn't really matter with them; when the Free Gift is of Their Choice, NOT MINE, it is a surprise.
2. I have tucked all but a select few and my Custom Creations in a box in another room a few months ago. I have grown out of that as well; mainly Decorative items anyway.
3. I was RECYCLING, until I had learned otherwise from my gal-pals, so I had stopped over a year ago.
4. I mostly have and Enjoy Images of Vaginas, Breasts and Women in my head. The images of the contrary ONLY started when I was being Mislabeled; it relatively forced the images onto me along with the stress. I REALLY TRULY DETEST THOSE STRESSED-INDUCED NIGHTMARE IMAGES.
5. Granted, but I have watched a LOT of Dude Shows as well in my lifetime., such as Transformers, Dragonball, DBZ and DBGT, Cowboy Bebob [sic], Outlaw Star and many others. And I am looking up more shows of the sort from the current decade, such as Jackass and Sports Shows and Movies.
6. That is your opinion, yet I partially agree with you on it not attracting women so well.
7. I enjoy HER BODY and HER VOICE; She is among my Top 3 Women Celebrities who I Would Love To Fuck; 1) Britney Spears 2) Pamela Anderson 3) Amy Jo Johnson (the original Pink Ranger from the Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers, and she starred in the movie Suzy Q [sic]).
8. When I sang that, I was singing it for me Enjoying the Nightlife with WOMEN. Again, that is your opinion of the song, and if it is true, I Never Knew That. I thought the Gay's Anthem was A*Teens' "Dancing Queen".
9. I DID NOT WATCH THE WHOLE SERIES, and I watched MAINLY to CHECK OUT the Hot Bods of the Women on the show.
10. Correction, I have had a few Male Friends in my lifetime. 1) I had FIVE to TEN from Kindergarten to 4th Grade. 2) Check Out the Slideshow of my Classmates from Providence Middle and Manchester High; THOSE Dudes and I were Bros. And to name just a few of them, Joseph Herring, Todd Holt, Damien Coy and Matthew Booty. 3) A few I am currently friends with within my church 4) Ex-Friend/Traitor, Joshua Martinez.

And the pages will be done as well. I'll play the Harmonica soon enough.

Love and Peace,
Christian C.

Go to — 9 January

UGH!!! Good Grief.

Well, to answer your first e-mail, the current status of my bank account continues to be untouched, with the past week's auto transfer of $10 to Savings, i currently has 68 in checking and 30 in savings.

And to answer the second thing, It bothers me as well, and it's been on for a short while now. To best answer your question, I refer you to the Cwcipedia's Mailbag and search for all letters from a mister Alec Benson Leary.

I am currently contemplating a counter-attack, because of the current wrong ad placements on the Cwcipedia.

Also, another current topic, of which I Confide into you with full trust. I am thinking of setting aside $100 for a lady of Escort Service, or an S.T.D.-free Prostitute in other words, to have sexual intercourse with on my upcoming Birthday, February 24. I await your swift reply with your thoughts on the topic.

Still thinking of the Counter-Attack against Alec.
Stay Safe with Love and Peace,
Christian C.

In my opinion, it would be better to put that 100 dollars to an actual girlfriend or to Sonichu (build it up to get tons of girlfriends) so you can get free sex.

In my opinion, if the claims are true and you are losing fans, you're goigg to have to step it up a lot. You're either going to have to diffuse him and find the source of his fans. Look at his wiki and find out more about him.

That is a good idea; I will see what dirt I can find on his...ugh...Asperpedia, and maybe expose something on that. I would spend it on a Real Girlfriend, but Obviously I have had no easy luck there in finding one. And the past few weeks, I have had a bunch of snow; it has melted considerably, yet there is still a yardful and a few vehichle-size patches. And my car's battery is old, so my family and I plan on jumping it and getting a new one this week.

On another note, though, if I recall, did you mention there were a few women in your area who like me?

Stay Safe,
Christian C.

13 January

Apparently, on the Asperpedia, there's this guy called Mao Ling apparently. he's their manager.

He's managing the shit out of them. He's got a fucking Wiki running in 6 days. He's a god compared to me.

And he has full control over the hardly respond to me...

I apologize for not getting back to you lately, but this is killing me too. I do respond to you. As a matter of fact, I finally have my car running again, and I still remember and am planning on making more on-the-town videos with interviews, flyers and such.

As for the Asperpedia, I understand it is editable by anyone, and I have an account created on there, but I am unsure on how to sabotage it; I mean like on Encyclopedia Dramatica, if I make an edit, IT CAN BE UNDONE EASILY, and I CAN BE BANNED WITH...UGH..."butthurt".

I have made announcements on my YouTube about my having NO alliance with Alec, that HE is ripping off of me and all that. I am doing the best I can on this; what else do you suggest I do against that Damned Asperpedia? ALEC has even put up the Offensive Porn Ads on MY Cwcipedia; EVEN I still lack the knowledge of the code to even put such Ads on HIS Sidebar, and I DO NOT WANT TO STOOP DOWN TO THEIR LEVEL with porn ads like that.

IF you can upload a VIRUS to delete everything on HIS Asperpedia WITHOUT them being able to UNDO it and the VIRUS Eats EVERYTHING on that website and DELETES THE WHOLE THING within hours, I would appreciate that, or if you can lead me to being able to do that, I would appreciate that as well.


I'll e-mail you again tomorrow.
Stay Safe,
Christian C.

15 January

I will be making the Interview Videos, and I will be designing, printing and distributing the flyers as Planned. I would say don't worry, but I'm too worried to even feel right saying that right now. I am more pissed off at those four than frightened. I would beat the crap out of each of them if I had the chance to.


I dare say this whole mess started with MY disagreement of there being ANY Link between Autism and Aspergers; I STILL disagree with the "Scientists", regardless of how long they may have studied those psychological topics. EVEN if I am living a lie, I'd rather live this lie than believe that truth ever. I AM RESISTANT TO THE CHANGE!

TTYL, Christian C.

Calling out — 15 January

I have just looked up the "Donations" page on the Cwcipedia; they say they have reached their goal and left no information that was there before. They listed YOUR name as one of the doners; don't YOU still have Advertisement control as well? If so, then I would appreciate you taking down the Asperchu ads; I would just be sincerely DELIGHTED and most appreciative not only NOT seeing the Asperpedia Ads, but to see YOUR Audiobook Ads again. In a complimentary way, I would love having your Audiobook CDs shoved in my face instead of that Asperpedia.

some quick financial questions — 16 January

how many credit cards do you have and how much debt is currently on each?

how much is in your checking and savings accounts?

just wondering how much capital you have

I'll send you the drawings for the flyer later, but I still would like your input on the text I wrote ASAP, please.

Currently, there is $40 in each of my Checking and Saving accounts. My father is taking care of my debts; I only have one credit card on me, and last time my father let me know, I have about $3500 or less to go. Plus I get some pocket money from my family for the small things, about $6 a day.

Christian C.

You might want to condense it down a bit. Correct the typos. It's a flier after all, people aren't going to want to read a 5 paragraph thing.

You need like a picture then strong title, subtitle and then a paragraph or two of info.

I see, can you be more specific on which I should remove or add? And I specifically said that I have less than $3500 in credit card debt.
I apologize for touching a nerve, but thank you for your input; it means a lot to me.

Stay safe,
Christian C.

You need to clear up your debts now. — 18 January

Well, currently and recently I have not been spending much, and my father is keeping track of the debt and paying it from what I give him each month. Plus, I was lack in updating, because I had to do the research on the content of the Asperchu pages for what I currently have on 10 pages. I have 12 pages to color today, and I will have them uploaded later today or tonight.

I'll TTYL,
Christian C.

Are you doing anything? — 21 January

I am doing a lot; I am drawing the pages, I am getting the videos, and I am informing my local public. Also, tonight, I have my first Young Adult Social Club Meeting to attend, so I will be getting good exposure there as well.

I'm just surprised to see Alec and his crew continuing to shoot themselves in the feet with Blood and Gore now; their fame will shortly be going down the toilet, just like the later season "Aqua Teen Hunger Force" and "12 oz Mouse" episodes.

I will also be making a new announcement video to upload to YouTube in a short while.

Thank you for your support, Vivian. And I apologize for not reading your book before, and telling you the truth of how my pastor and pastoral counselor felt about it. I was soo busy dealing with my own real life problems and the Sonichu Drawings and whatnot to find time, but I will make time to read your book very soon.

I'll TTYL,
Stay Safe and have a good day,
Christian C.

i noticed you made a donation to haiti — 27 January

I donated $20 to Haiti a few days ago; so that left me with over 20 in my checking. It's all good; I'll be getting the next one next Wednesday, and then we have this week's transfer putting my savings at 60. It's all cool.

Also, it actually was 3 or 4 days between Page Uploads. I had a lot to deal with in real life during those days, such as attending my first Young Adult Social Group Meeting last Friday, where I also met and hit it off well with a nice and pretty 23-year old woman. So give me a break. At least I am in the groove of things, Plus I have been falling asleep earlier lately, and that leaves me with rescheduling the update times.

I'll TTYL, Stay Safe,
Christian C.

how are you doing finance wise — 31 January

i hope you haven't been putting much into video games...

i mean, more than one new game per month is way too much for your budget right now

I am doing well financially; after the transfer last week, I have 70 in savings now. I have been spending less on video games for your information. Have you been continuing to check the Cwcipedia lately? I've put up a bunch of posts from fans on a Sonichu Forum Site I've learned about, Sonichu Forums. The plan on re-situating the routine to match my bedtime change is simply draw 2 pages during the afternoon/evening of that day, then upload them the following morning. I have four pages I'm working on to upload tomorrow morning; I will be coloring them after I get offline.

I'll TTYL,
Stay Safe,
Christian C.

6 February

do you have any money?

i think it's time to try to go for broke

You know the nintendo store in new york? i think promoting sonichu there would be a major boost for fans and would get back some that you have lost from not updating

i honestly think this would be a good idea

let me see what your finances for february and see what we can do

Hey, Vivian. I'm currently having PC trouble; the fresh snow here caused a 40-minute power failure; knocked it quite a bit. I am currently unable to get it beyond its "HP Pavillion [sic]" intro screen. I can't even start up the system recovery. I'm typing this on my PS3.

Also, the bank update; the 800 came in on schedule; 630 went to my father and my credit card, I spent about 40 to 50 on a date with a lovely and sweet 23 year old woman that could not have been better. It was perfect. I'm going to take her out again in a couple of weeks, after the new 20 inches of snow melts.

I can't afford a New York trip now. I'll plan it out, and maybe make the trip in a month or two.

Stay safe.
Christian C.

9 February

I am getting those pages drawn and colored as quickly as possible. I had to deal with a LOT of snow shoveling; my right shoulder is bothering me right now. Also, I will have the financial updates for you after this is done.

Christian C.

define a lot

and when will it be done

Front yard; over 20 inches deep; do the math. this week.
still, everyone has to shovel snow

2 hours tops


Hey, Vivian — 11 February

Well, here's the situation on the bank currently; I still have 70 dollars in my Savings, yet no new transfers into it will occur for this whole month, because of *plans* listed below with the items that came out of the 800 for this month.

-$630 for my father, items included in this will be listed below.
-Room + Board 250
-Gas for Car 80
-DVR and Internet 70
-Auto Insurance 40
-Cell Phone 40
-Payment on Credit Card Debts he picked up as previously mentioned 150
-*$100 Pocketed for the plans on the hooker/prostitute to give me my first intercourse on my birthday, as previously mentioned.* (This may or may not happen, depending on how the woman I am dating, talking and hanging out with feels about possible intercourse before or on my birthday. If I can swing it, it would make me feel a lot better.)
-About $40 on the date I had with her Wednesday the 3rd; It could not have gone better. We both had a good time, and I held her hand for over a minute. :)
-The remaining $30, plus $20 from the end of last month, will remain in the checking safe and sound and untouched.
-And there is also the pocket money I get daily from my family; it is being used on food, and some of it is being saved.

Also, an update on the pages and the Cwcipedia; I am currently on Page 95 of the book (about 15 pages are still uncolored). I will be sending the promised Simonla Kill-Off and apologetic pages to Evan's E-mail before Saturday for his reference.

You can help at the moment by spreading the word about the resurrection and the special Message on the day I called, "Christian Love Day". ;)

I gtg, but I'll check in again another day.

Love and Peace and Stay Safe,
Christian C.
-The Weekly Transference into the Savings will resume on or after the 3rd of March.

12 February

God damn it Chris.

i thought you were gonna have the cwcipedia back up by like wednesday, seriously JUST HURRY UP GOD DAMN

you realize how hard it is to make money when you have ZERO FANS

I have realized that; I have just advised the SysOp to go ahead with the Resurrection of the Cwcipedia. Daily update will resume shortly.

Stay Safe,
Christian C.

it's been like 2 weeks without a single word for you (publicly) about the COMIC.

you really need to do something soon. seriously, asperpedia apparently hit 1 million views, how many do you have? last i checked it was around 1.7 million

they're catching up.

I am working on it very hard; Evan will have the pages later today.

so, are you doing anything? — 17 February

Yes, I have been doing a lot. Yesterday, I answered another mailbag; I have over 30 drawn new pages, most of which re yet to be colored in, but I am working diligently on that. I will be uploading page 75 tonight. Also, yesterday, I started the Character Bio Page with a gathered starting collection of images and links. I have drawn new Rosechu's Past memories with Kel for Rosechu's page wich [sic] I will type up tonight. I will upload all the rest of the pages, after one page a day, in a bunch on my birthday.

Stay Safe,
Christian C.

well it's your birthday — 24 February

Yes, it is, but I won't officially be 28 until 5:30 AM, Eastern Standard Time. The pages will be upload this coming afternoon.

4 March

Honestly, it seems like you don't care, and that's fine. But you have to channel your energy into SOMETHING to get somewhere. I suggest you just make something completely original. You should make something more mature. Then you will probably get the inspiration to work on Sonichu again. Make a special comic book about something completely new to show that you have a lot of talents in art and storytelling and are capable of change.
Hey, Vivian. Firstly, I have been working on Sonichu, but I have been forced into trauma recently, because my father had to go to the hospital recently for congested heart failure. He came back home yesterday and is recovering well. Secondly, there is a project I've been working on the side as well,and I may draw comicpages for a preview on that; we'll see. And third, my financial update: my tugboat came in on time; I still have 70 in Savings. The weekly transfers has resumed. I gave my father his check for 630; 50 for a PSN card; 10 will be taken later this month for Netflix, and I'm thinkin' of getting a haircut and restyle to look like one of the guys from Celtic Thunder. The remainder will be saved for the transfers, and for any rainy day events.

That is all for now, and I will check in again later.

Stay Safe,
Christian C.

why celtic thunder lol don't they have 5 different haircuts or something? might as well wear a skirt or something...

tell your father to get well soon.

you should just post some stuff about your side-project on the cwcipedia. you can't leave fans hangin'. i know the trauma from your father may stress you out, but if he's doing okay, things will be alright.

To answer your question, my lady friend likes one of the dudes of Celtic Thunder. And I am thinking about the update for tonight on the Cwcipedia.

8 March

you can take a small plot

expand it out to 7 pages

ta-da comic

put together 4 of them (4 weeks = 1 month)

for a monthly sonichu comic

see that's a great idea that you should totally do

you know, chris, television shows have a schedule

seth mcfarlane has THREE shows to do weekly (barring any important coverage like winter olympics etc)

manga artists in japan do their mangas monthly

akira toriyama did 11~ chapter books every 2 months which had about 10 pages per chapter

that's around 100 pages per 2 months

you can easily do a page a day, you USED TO DO IT TOO

That is a good idea, Vivian. I still continue to work hard on the pages, and have been. The only excuse I have recently was takin' out and makin' progress, relationship-wise, with my sweet little lady friend. Speaking of which, I've uploaded a NEW LittleBiGPlanet Foretaste level for another project she and I are working on together. We have also shared a kiss recently. :) I feel at peace and happy with her, in person and in heart.

Currently, there is 80 in my Savings, and about 50-100 in my Checking; I'm going to let that set for a while with the weekly 10 transfers.

I will make a Cwcipedia update very soon.

Stay Safe.
Christian C.

Look, I'm through trying to help you with Sonichu. — 9 March

Obviously you don't give a shit anymore so there's no point in managing something you don't care about. I'll take it off your hands.
No, Vivian. I care a lot about Sonichu, and I d not want you to take anything off of my hand, capishce?
Okay seriously, you had weeks to update with ANYTHING. I already explained to you that not everyone in the world has a PS3. Not everyone can view your level or whatever. That's not updating, that's just playing video games and pretending you're actually putting effort into something.

As far as I can tell with Jack, he's sick of you just doing nothing. You have shown 0 intention of actually updating. A week ago you said you might update but then you do nothing. You told me like 2 days ago you would and you still haven't done anything.

How hard is it to do ANYTHING? He wouldn't be so crass with you if you were actually intending on doing something. You probably spend like 5 hours a day just watching TV and playing video games instead of actually doing anything productive.

I'm still offering to take Sonichu off your hands.

14 March

I hope you are well and safe. As you may have heard, I have had trouble the past few days. I still suffer lingering heartache from not knowing if [The Wallflower] has recovered from that chaos yet. All I can do is give her time and space. At least that page of her on that damn CWCki is gone.

BTW, I was listing the other pages, pertaining to all who I care about, of which I would like to see similar treatment in reference to [Wallflower]'s Page, YOU INCLUDED, Vivian, but more of an Upgrade in Status, instead of a total revamp. Anyway, I saw the page on the CWCki of you,, is the photograph on the top of the page really you?

Stay Safe, I'll TTYL,

lol no i'm way hotter

What the fuck did you do to this woman? — 22 April

God damn it Chris.

She now wants all women to not date you or some shit. What the hell.

Yeah, don't ask, Vivian; it was an internet relationship gone wrong. My fault, I led her to the Damn CWCki to back up my point of Trollsgetting to my dedicated videos on MegaUpload sites; apparently MediaFire is NO different. That relationship is dead now. :_(

Stay Safe,

No no Chris.

She left a message then left forever.

Hello, my name is Jackie. Jesus, I can't believe I'm doing this.
Long story short, I'm in the market for a boyfriend and I posted online, thinking I would give it a shot. I meet a guy named Christian Weston Chandler. Guess where this is going. I didn't know anything about this guy before I met him there. I talked back and forth with him for a bit on email, got to know him a little. I didn't know he was such an internet freak. But he told me all about this cwcki site, because I wanted to know more about him and I wanted him to make a video for me. He initially refused to make a video for me because he said it "got him in trouble before". I didn't know what he meant, so he sent me here to see videos of him talking to previous girlfriends and how the nasty trolls got him in trouble for it. Mind you, he was very careful to remind me that this website is full of lies and shouldn't be trusted, despite the fact he himself sent me here.
But I respected the fact he was at least being honest with me about this online shit. Or so it seemed. I watched a bunch of his videos, got more and more disturbed by them. I questioned him on some things, like how he apparently cheated on one of his ex-girlfriends with some other girl online. As was quite insulting (but not at all surprising now that I've familiarized myself with this site), he lied to me and said it never happened. Even though he himself admitted to cheating on her in a video HE MADE.
And a bunch of other shit he lied about too. Like professing his love for me every five minutes, even though he COULDN'T REMEMBER MY FUCKING NAME. Check this video out: [] I asked him to make me a video showing me his female-pleasuring skills (this was before I started to realize what a disgusting piece of shit he is), and he CALLS ME BY HIS EX-GIRLFRIEND'S NAME.
So there you go, have at it. He calls this website full of liars, but as far as I can tell he's a worthless piece of shit and this site is pretty frank about it. I'm fucking done dealing with him but I thought I'd contribute my experience as a warning to all the other women in Virginia.

Well, I am not finding that paragraph quote on the CWCki; please tell me where you found it. And in case you haven't found it yet, you can learn in a nutshell what happened from the e-mail transcripts they have trolled together on the CWCki.


Well, I never asked for a reputation. - 16 May

This WHOLE WORLD is becoming autistic by gluing ALL of their attention to computers, internet and all that. I am a REAL LIFE MAN, and while I do not appreciate or care much of the "reputation" that has been made against me on the crappy internet, the TRUE Reputation I would call my own is in REAL LIFE and from ACTUALLY HANGING OUT WITH ME IN PERSON.

Feel Free to Spread this Quote from me, "If you REALLY want to make a Reputation Of Me, then Hang Out With Me In Real Life. Quit hiding behind your F***ing Computers and "Anonymous" Bu**S***."

Nobody is Perfect. But I AM a Good Person, and I do not have to be recorded to prove it.


Yeah, tell that to everyone else. You're the one who's autistic by not adapting to the world that's changing. This isn't the 1950's, son.

Why would someone want to interact with you if all they see is a manchild who refuses to grow up? That's what you are no matter if you are in real life or on the internet.

It doesn't matter if you want a reputation or not. You have earned one and that's what girls know of you.

30 May

Do you not remember that you're 28 years old? Seriously, you should really seek some mental help if that's the case.

Also, I created an account for you on the CWCipedia. Username: ChrisCSonichu, Pass: pikachu

You should add some stuff, don't vandalize! Thankies!

Firstly, in case you did not read the added memo on my YouTube video, I have relinquished the Cwcipedia after it became the Worst Hacked and Beyond Recoverable Mess Ever.

Second, I have been and am spacing myself away from the internet, I became tired of dealing with those clowns.

And I have never refered [sic] myself as a teenager lately; obviously this is another lousy rumor they came up with to try to make me give them attention. Ain't Gonna Happen.

I am not theirs to control; I'm keeping it Real Life.


Look at your video during your Seinfeld bit.

Do you not even pay attention to what you talk about?