Mailbag 45

Mailbag 45 was uploaded to the CWCipedia on 22 January 2010. Considering Chris's most recent actions, It will probably be answered early Saturday morning, thanks to his now totally screwed Biological Clock.

Awaiting Answers

From: Hamsty the Hamster <hamstythehamster@gmail.com> Seriously. Fans from 10 years ago have grown up. Maybe you should too.

From: Mike Hawke <fail2comply@live.co.uk> Hey Chris, Would you sell all of your games and toys, if it will guarantee you'll get a girlfriend?

Fuck yea Asperchu.

From: darkestfor@asia.com I'm writing because, after seeing the Asperchu "hardcore" ad, I have decided to give up your baby comic for Alec's mature book. Have fun coloring within the lines, Baby Chrissie. Don't shit your diapers too much.

From: Harold Man Dear Chris, I used to be a big fan of Sonichu for a long time because it seemed to have very subversive themes. You drew in a manner that seemed intentionally bad. Like you were parodying Republican views. But you're serious? That's amazing. No one would like your comic if you were actually being serious. I just told my friends that you're serious and we're are laughing our asses off. You're so naive. You're really serious. Like, the biggest Sonichu fan forum is full of threads about how hilarious your work is and how they'd write comic book companies to carry your work. Just wait 'til word gets out that you're serious. That you aren't kidding when you say Sonichu is straight. Everyone will leave. Your audience now is all college students who think you're being ironic and funny. Little kids aren't interested. Believe me, I tried to show my brother. He told me to get the crap out of his face because he was playing X-Box. Kids don't care about cartoons anymore. The only people who read it, read it because it has undertones of homosexuality. Seriously, I think you misunderstand why Asperchu is popular. Now, its drawing is average, but what hooks readers is the underlying themes. Because of your autism, you don't get it. It's like a big secret joke that you don't see. Maybe you should ask a non-autistic friend to explain it to you. That is, if you care about your fans. They'll all leave and you won't know why. You're saying Alec shot himself in the foot. Pfft, he made the smarter move by going more adult and serious. He knows his fanbase. Apparently you don't know yours. I know you won't reply to this because you're a coward. ~ A former fan

From: Mike Jackson <mikejackson113@hotmail.com> Chris, I need you now more than ever. I need you to do a shoutout in your video for my son Mike Junior. He has run away with the prostitute that I hired for him a week ago. He'd told my wife and I that it was a love match, but we didn't believe him. Now they are on the run to Vegas where they are going to get married- my son has a fake ID and is going to use that to pretend that he's 18. Can you ask him to come home? We promise that we won't run his girlfriend away as long as he comes back. Also, my wife is concerned about the language you are using to the writers of Asperchu. She says that it is way too harsh for our children and because the kids are already so upset, she has made me stop reading your comics to our children. Sincerely, Mike P.S.- MIKE JUNIOR COME HOME! ALL IS FORGIVEN!

From: Billy MC <billymcbigmac@gmail.com> Hello Chris, I am a big fan of you and Sonichu. I am writing to ask you if you ever worry about the Hamburglar stealing your McDonald's food. My mother takes me to McDonald's quite a lot and whenever I am there I am always sure to look around for the Hamburglar because you never know where he might be lurking, waiting to snatch away your Big Mac and fries! Speaking of McDonald's, you and the Grimace share many similarities. I believe he might be High-Functioning Autistic too! Love, Billy MC

From: Faye Dexter <ecksdeexter@gmail.com> Dear Chris, most of your fans that are still reading are ADULTS and we demand to be treated as such! You lost most of your underage fans with the sex storylines(even censored, most parents don't let that kind of thing fly) so I suggest that there be more MATURE storylines with gore and violence. Games rated M usually have gore in them and those are rated M for MATURE. TV-MA is for MATURE AUDIENCES and usually has gore and violence. So could you include those in the comic so your adult audience doesn't feel like they're reading a baby comic for babies?

From: Andrew Rinker <ffa_chewster@yahoo.com> I'm just wondering why you were so rude in your response to the final question in mailbag 43 (from Keith Keithson). All he did was present an in depth, well thought out argument. Is that how you respond to any argument you do not agree with? Wouldn't it be better to actually attempt to refute his claims? All you are doing with your response is showing that you have no evidence to refute his claims, and are therefore conceding that they are, in fact, the truth. No disrespect intended, I'm just curious why you don't simply take the time to present your own counterpoints to his, rather than just telling him to "go fuck yourself". That's very rude, and only serves to portray you in a negative light.

From: Bernardo Garcia <garciscinq@gmail.com> So let me get this straight, you are saying people who don't like your comic series are mentally underdeveloped and have poor taste?

From: Trap Master Dear Chris You've said you don't want to remove Simonla from the comics because it would be taking away Wild's girlfriend. It's wrong to put Wild's, a FICTIONAL character, feelings ahead of a real person. Leaving Simonla in your comics is hurting Evan, stop being a monster and do the right thing.

From: Manfred Eicher <m.eicher@gmail.com> Hey Chris, I am a volunteer with the German Red Cross and I am currently in Haiti helping to bring people's lives back to normal. It's grueling work. It's hot and some people still can't get clean water and food. Although your poster is nice, it won't get things done here. If you really want to help, it often makes a big difference when celebrities donate large sums of money which they encourage people to match. You may have already done this and if you have, you should announce it. Alternatively, if you were to volunteer to come to Haiti and put some elbow grease into the project, it might encourage others to do the same. It would go a lot further than a poster and we would really appreciate the help. Best regards, Manfred

From: Brianna Ricaud <bricaud75@gmail.com> Chris, in your reply to my mail you claimed that you always censor adult stuff from your comics and that images were "tricked from you". Let me remind you that it was YOU that took those pictures. It was YOU that drew a NASTY, PORNOGRAPHIC picture of you MOLESTING your best friend Megan. No one forced you. You have proved that you're a liar and a hypocrite and you have lost another fan. Alec has never lied and he doesn't do cowardly things and then deny them. Good riddance, Brianna

From: Cpt. Wyvern <masterwyvern@googlemail.com> Why do you always criticise the Asperchu comics for being poorly drawn? Your art style isn't too great too, y'know, you don't have much room to criticise others.

From: Gil Gerard <gilsemailaddy@yahoo.com> As a fan of your comic, recently I've been feeling insulted by the things you've been saying to us. In your mailbags, you've been calling us hypocrites and mentally devolved, and you've been slashing and ignoring a lot of good questions from your mailbags for no reason. This is no way to be treating your fans. You seem to want us to worship you like you're God or something, and you seem to not be able to maturely handle criticism. I noticed that other comic artists will actually answer the letters they get. I know you don't like that Leary guy, but at least he answers emails and treats his fans with respect. I hope you do the same before you lose all of your fans. --Gil

Caught in a lie. Again.

From: levelledcompany@bikerider.com I saw your "TheTailofRosechu.jpg" image and thought, "Hey, that's not what I remember." Then I looked back at the comics, and sure enough, the Raichu's tail is pointed and sharp, like that of a male's. What gives? Why lie to your fans like this? You can't just lie to your fans, and you can't just keep going back and changing stuff in your comics. I hated how you changed the "My love quest is finally over" page almost as much as I hate being lied to by a big fat liar like you. It's stuff like this, all the lies and retcons, that make me feel like I should stop reading the comic. If you want to make things right, apologize, admit your mistake, promise to never make the same mistake again, and (this is the most important part) NEVER DO IT AGAIN. Stop lying, even "small" lies, and quit changing your old stuff.

For Truth and Honesty, see the archived CWCipedia page on Mailbag 45