Evan E-mails

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“	Every Person is Doing it!! Aahhhhhhhh...Relief... :)	”
Chris during his editing sessions on ED.

These are emails between Chris and Evan Christopher George, including the infamous masturbatin' and squirtin' emails from November 2007 and emails about Asperchu from March 2010

November 2007


This is some fanart of Sonichu my friends and I have drawn. I hope you enjoy it! [schu girlfriend auditions.jpg - An image of a happy, cartoonish Chris sitting at a table with two signs, one saying "GIRLFRIEND AUDITIONS" and the other saying "NO DARKIES".] [sonichu rule 34.PNG - A comic in which Chris whines to Sonichu about not having a girlfriend. Sonichu feels sad for Chris, and gives Chris a peck on the cheek. Chris is shocked, but Sonichu hushes Chris and says, "We need this." In the last panel, Sonichu is fucking Chris in the ass, the latter excited beyond belief about finally losing his virginity and soon getting to brag about it on YouTube.] [sonichu rule 34 2.jpg - A picture of Sonichu masturbating while saying "NO DARKIES, JERKOP!". Credits are listed as 'Bui Anon, © Anon 2007'] [sonichu fanart.gif - Chris and another Sonic-Pikachu hybrid waving their fists and glaring at each other.]


CWCSonichu to [Evan] Thank you for your fanart contributions. In constructive criticism, I like the one with me and the "Girlfriend Auditions," as well as my glaring in the eyes of the blue guy. But I AM FEELING GREAT DETEST TOWARDS THE OTHER TWO; Sonichu and I are NOT of that nature at all!!!!! If you would like to make it up to me, though, please draw a strip of Rosechu stripping for Sonichu, and have him f* her, and draw Rosechu masturbating and squirtin'** [emphasis added]. I AM STRAIGHT, DAMN IT!!!! I WILL NOT BE VEERED IN ANY OTHER DISGUSTINGLY GROTESQUE DIRECTION!!!! Again, MOST Nasty Fanarts ARE NOT APPRECIATED AT ALL; please feel free to share that quote with the rest of the fans. Sincerely; Christian Weston Chandler. [Chris included a picture in the email of himself and Sonichu looking angry. Sonichu appears to be waving his hand awkwardly.] We're Keeping Track.


I'm very sorry I disappointed you, Chris-Chan. I drew what you wished. [Evan included a comic featuring Rosechu with a giant squirtin' penis.]


Oh, and here's more art from more of my friends. I didn't draw any of this stuff, though, so if you don't like it, I have no guilt! [Evan included four drawings, including depictions of more Rosechu penis and a naked Mary Lee Walsh].


Alright, I have one last batch of fanart! I'm sorry to send so many to you, but my friends are really eager to share it all. I hope you enjoy! [Evan appended five more drawings, with more dickgirl Rosechu and a parody of The Oversized Drinking Straw of Fail].


CWCSonichu to [Evan] Thank You Very MUCH!!! You just saved me a lot of trouble on sorting out the pics from the hellish embelishment of my person that I am certain you are in on. [Chris included a link to the "Chris-chan" page on ED]


[Evan] to CWCSonichu What! What a horrible page. I'm sorry! I must wonder how they got pictures of our e-mails! I hope no one's hacking my e-mail account...


"CWCSonichu@aol.com" to [Evan] Do me a favor, draw a VAGINA on my Rosechu; Rosechu IS A GIRL; SHE NEVER HAD A FREAKIN' PICKLE!!!! IF I SEE ONE MORE FREAKIN' PICKLE, AND YOU MAY SPREAD THIS QUOTE TO OTHER ADULT FAN ARTISTS, I WILL CREATE YOU IN SOUL CALIBUR III AND BEAT YOU UP LIKE THERE'S NO TOMORROW!!!


Uh oh. [This came with a drawing of Rosechu holding a pickle and saying, "I wish pickles could masturbate and squirt." Cartoon Evan replies, "Fudge, you're going to beat me up in SC now, aren't you? I shouldn't have let our souls get fiercely entangled."]


YOU DRILLED OUT MY DICK You have wronged me more than you have wronged Alec, and we both know it. You steal from me and still refuse to admit that Simonla is a ripoff. I am PLEASED with Simonla's death, but YOU DRILLED OUT MY DICK. Are you JEALOUS of my penis, and the fact that I have recieved VAGINAL RELATIONS with it? Why would you DRILL MY DICK OUT?? And have a FOURTH GRADER do it to me? Do you even realize how SICK that is? Making a little girl commit murder??


Firstly, I apologize for portraying your execution; the pages will be changed within a few days. Second, As I have made it clear in the past, I don't get along well with most male persons, and there ARE those with dicks longer than 7 inches; yes I am jealous of those individuals, not just you. Third, Accept it Face-Value; YOU GOT YOUR WISH, Simonla is dead. Let's agree that your wish has been satisfied and move on. Have a good day, Christian W. Chandler.


Thanks for cooperating and all, I'm just very weirded out by the fact that not only did you have to kill me, you had to castrate me. Like, isn't that a BIT overboard? Making a fourth grader drill out some dude's penis is a bit extreme. How do you think Sandy felt about it? I'm sorry for pressing you on the subject, I just find it really odd that you had to go to that sort of length. It's a little hypocritical too, you whine at Alec for having Metal Asperchu set you on fire but then it's okay for you to have Sandy drill out my genitals? I do appreciate that Simonla is dead and I'd like to move on, it's just frankly sort of disturbing that you castrated me. I wouldve been fine with just dying, you can leave in me getting executed if you want. But my penis? Really? Just because you're redoing it doesn't undo the past! And you seem to think it's fine that you made a fourth grader do it! I just want an answer, I'm not going to make you kill anyone else anymore. It's just weird to me. Sort of disturbing. Would you cut off the dicks of every other man in the world if you could?


To answer your question... no I would not. Again that was portrayed out of rage. And Sandy was enraged against you for killing her mother; would you not be that super angry towards the killer of your own mother, if that was the case, God forbid?