Chris and his ego

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Of everything that makes Chris "Chris", his egotism is one of the most important and dangerous. His ego has gotten so big that he outright refuses to admit he is ever wrong (unless he thinks he can gain something by doing so), believe that potential sweethearts are actually trolls, or admit that his comics are actually shitty. It is this egotism that may one day lead to someone playing Kick the Autistic for real.

Origins of the ego

As pointed out in the Chris and Fame page, Chris's ego has been formed and tempered by many things: coddling by his mother, Barbara; his victory in the Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes; and the fact that he can successfully use his autism as a crutch. Because of his mother, he believes that everything bad that happens to him is the fault of someone else - be it Mary Lee Walsh and the villainous jerkops, slanderous trolls, the school board, or whoever else the Chandler parents were able to scapegoat. Because of his stroke of dumb luck in the Sonic contest, he feels that he is destined to win everything with a minimal amount of effort, because he has autism and deserves special treatment.

Additionally, he has taken his occasional mentions in the press, largely about his obsession with video games, to mean he has become famous.

Chris' ego has notoriously contributed to his warped perception of himself; he believes himself to be flawless, or almost flawless at the very least, since whatever few flaws he admits having, or is forced to admit he has, such as shitting himself, running out of breath extraordinarily fast while running, and not being able to get a girlfriend are assumed by him to happen "to the best of us" or being someone or something else's fault, leaving Chris to actually consider himself a normal person who happens to be autistic and famous.

His interactions with people have also formed his ego. After being kicked out of class at PVCC, he decided he needed a girlfriend, but because of women not liking a man that smells of shit, sweat and Axe, he ended up setting a ridiculously high goal for himself. In the process, he refused to interact with men of any type, because they're all JERKS who have taken all the girls and left none for him, with the underlying implication that if he could only find a bunch of single women, he could "have his pick" of them. He feels that security guards are nothing more than cock-blocking jerks because they interfere with his Love Quest, when they're actually doing their job, and that trolls have nothing better to do than to torture him and need to GET A LIFE, when Chris is the one staying at home, drawing shitty comics in an attempt to get china.

Firstly, YOU WISH YOU WERE ME...
Chris, addressing a true and honest fan while being completely deluded, Rejected Mailbag

War against the ego

One of the main forces opposing Chris's ego are the white knights. These misguided souls have attempted to get Chris to understand that what he's doing is ridiculous and that he needs to grow up. Instead, he brushed them all aside, assuring himself that he was TRUE and HONEST, and could do no wrong. One of the more popular white knights, Vivian Gee, became a troll when she couldn't get through to Chris.

When asked to get real, psychiatric help, Chris has said that his church counselor, Rocky Shoemaker, is enough for him, and that she could do so much more than someone with an actual degree in that field. He seems to believe that because her title includes the word "counselor," she is every bit as qualified as a real doctor (the fact that most pastoral counselors see people for free probably helps as well, since Chris would never spend part of his precious monthly tugboat on something useful when there are video games to buy).

Effects of Chris's egotism

Unsurprisingly, Chris's ego has lead to a number of undesirable personality traits, the most important of which are his simple-mindedness and his incredible gullibility. In terms of simple-mindedness, the man is like the Sith: he only deals in absolutes - either you're with him or you're a troll. This has been very obvious in his answers to the Mailbag, where he refuses to listen to any talk - even from professionals - about the similarities between Asperger Syndrome and autism, denies that there are any shortcomings in his work, and shrugs off any advice about how to improve his health or appearance, labelling anyone who suggests he has any kind of shortcoming a troll.

His gullibility is astounding. No matter how many times it's happened before, Chris is easily led around by the nose by trolls promising China or threatening Sonichu. The earlier trolling schemes, such as Blanca, PandaHalo and Jimmy Hill, got Chris to jump through hoops and exposed so much information about Chris and his personality that they had to start a wiki to keep track of it all.

Ego and the Real World

I'd say... I'd say I'm all around. You see, the problem is that I have too many skills that I am good at. You might say that I am a jack of all trades and a master of none.
Chris, Mumble 3

Chris's ego is one of amazement and wonder for the trolls. From one incident to the next, nothing seems to faze him. Even more amazing is that whenever he attempts to do something, he puts more focus on himself than the task at hand.

An interesting point Chris likes to make is that he thinks that he is a major celebrity, going so far as to add himself into the Wikipedia articles for Anne Boleyn, because of some (pretend) ancestry, and Vanessa Hudgens, because of a "hook up" between the two (troll). This was due to Chris somehow believing that he actually had a big fan base for his Sonichu comics, not realizing that, in actuality, they were all trolls. This was made worse when a horrible troll scheme backfired, causing Chris to win the GameStop Be A Star Sweepstakes without realizing what the actual prize was. Chris now believes he has an army of loyal fans at his beck and call, ready to get rid of annoying trolls or to get rid of videos.

Another thing that Chris enjoys doing is divulging every last detail about his life. Nothing is too candid for Chris - getting haircuts, drinking his own navy, even giving away his phone number! The only thing he hasn't done with wild abandon is give away his Social Security number and when that happens, look out!

Numerous times, Chris has shown that he believes he has powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal autistics. This line of thinking was caused by Chris's assumption that he had killed Ryan Cash just by withholding the comic and would worsen when he believed that his Curse-ye-ha-me-ha actually caused Liquid Chris to have some sort of horror befall him.

Examples of Chris's Ego in the Real World

  • Manchester High School - When Chris graduated from high school, he actually cried because he believed that he deserved a number of artistic awards for his very sub-par work. By his own admission, he also made a scene and ran out after getting his diploma, eventually having to be consoled by both his mother and gal-pal Tiffany Gowen.
  • Harvey Birdman Commercial - in an attempt to win a contest involving the animated avian lawyer, Chris went to great lengths to talk about himself, his rivalry with Mary Lee Walsh and Sonichu, but very, very little about Birdman himself.
  • Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown - After losing the contest to Adam Stackhouse, Chris would have a major hissy-fit over the loss, proclaiming even the slightest mistake as cheating, despite the fact that Chris himself had broken numerous rules in the process. Even worse, he attempted to fabricate the Playstation webpage to show that he himself had won and not Adam.
  • Robot Chicken's What Would You Do For A PS3 Contest - Chris, when talking about how far he would go to get a PS3, admitted he would throw away the cure for autism for it.
  • Wal-Mart - When asked to cease his solicitation, Chris refused to budge, rambled on in some stupid speech, and actually ran. He would do this again in a Target soon after, only to be arrested in the process.
  • The GAMe PLACe - Chris acted in this store as if he owned the place. He was rude with the patrons, abused the access to a flat-screen TV and was an all-around pain for the owner, Michael Snyder. After much antics, he was banned from the place. Chris filmed a half assed apology nine months later, not because he was sorry for his actions, but because the store was the only place that had Eye of Judgement cards.
  • Megan Schroeder - For the longest time, Chris actually believed that he and Megan were going out as boyfriend and girlfriend. He even attacked someone for getting near Megan. When the infamous ShecameforCWC.JPG picture was discovered, Chris actually thought that the reason she was upset was because she wasn't used to sexual things. He, then, tried to make Megan believe that the bullying from those amongst ED was MUCH worse than the fact that he did the picture because he was afraid of trying to rape her. He was also convinced that the main reason she was offended was that she hadn't been exposed to as much pornography as he had. Chris would later blame ED for the fact that he lost her friendship, not caring it was his fault in the first place.
  • PVCC - After being expelled for his appalling behavior by the Student's Dean, Chris felt the need to write to the Then-Standing President of the United-States, George W. Bush. The idea that a standing President would be willing to use his clout to reverse a local third-rate college's administrative decision is ludicrous at best.
  • CWC's Second Message - In what would be his opening attack on trying to get the trolls to remove his page following losing Megan, Chris's opening words, amazingly, were:
Y'all should know me by now, but if you don't, I am Christian Weston Chandler, the original creator of Sonichu, the Electric Hedgehog Pokemon, back on March 17th, 2000.
  • LittleBigPlanet - When Chris had shown up on LBP community and posted videos addressed to them, he once again said people "should know him by now". He immediately assumed people would praise him for his levels, especially the "Collector's Case", which he thought was the most original LBP level idea ever.
  • McIntire Park - During a newscast, Chris happened to pass by a cameraman who was videotaping someone being interviewed. As he did, he flashed his Sonichu medallion as if to say "Hey, look at me! I'm more important!" Sometime later, he appeared in a town hall meeting over the park itself. He flashed his shitty Sonichu and Rosechu drawing trying to save it, then tried to speak, only to be shot down.
  • Web Soup - When Chris learned that one of his videos was featured on an episode, he took it as a good thing, not realizing that the show made fun of people on the Internet.
  • 10 September 2009 - Chris, in his ever growing paranoia, automatically assumes that a possible interview from Veronica Belmont of Playstation Magazine Europe is a troll due to the fact that the person didn't leave a return number, demanding that if she truly wanted to interview him, she should come personally to his house… then starts trying to suck up to her just in case it wasn't a troll.
  • Rejected Mailbag - Chris hates being proven wrong, especially about Asperger's and Autism being part of the same spectrum. He also takes issue with letters that point out the flaws in his comic pages, which is interesting considering he has no problem telling fans about the flaws he finds in their fan art, calling it "constructive criticism". He's gone from simply ignoring people correcting his mistake to placing these "offending" letters in his rejected mailbag. Even more, when letters start talking about the fact that Autism and Asperger's are similiar, he's begun tossing them into his "Autism Mailbag" and whenever someone tries to mention anything else connected to his past, he automatically goes into a "mental block" and refuses to go any further. On December 5, 2009, Chris wrote a long essay that made little sense, which mainly consisted of him bawwing that he was a unique and special snowflake, and that Aspies are faking fakers that take away the specialness of his autism. Despite autism and Asperger's existing in the populace long before he was born, Chris also states that he "...Helped cultivate the First Generation of Autistic People".
  • The Sonichu promotional video - In the Part 2 of his video, Chris shows to the camera an elegant drawing of the two main heroes of the comic book made by a fan called Allie. Not only does he proceed to comment "Rosey's tail was wrong, but I'll forgive her," he present an actual, sub-par copy of the drawing made by himself as a better version.
  • Copyright claim against Vivian Gee - Chris issued Death threats against Vivian Gee due to the Audiobooks she made out of his comic. He excused himself a month later and ask for a quote of 25% out of the donations she received for her hard work. It is worth mentioning that the excuse AND the demand for a share of the profits were in the same e-mail, both separated by a single dot.
  • Mumble 3 - While talking to Max, Chris tells him that the reason why he doesn't have a job is because he has so many awesome skills, he just can't choose one.
  • Jimmy Hill and Liquid Chris - While Chris is more than willing to declare Sonichu as a parody so he can make his multimedia franchise, he blows his stack whenever someone actually parodies Sonichu and himself. He threatened "legal action" during the Jimmy Hill saga and went all out to prove himself the TRUE and HONEST Chris when Liquid showed up. During the Kacey and Liquid Call, when Liquid threatened to go to the police over the Gun Comic, Chris was certain that the police would be more concerned over the fact that someone was impersonating him than the fact that he threatened to murder him.
  • Father Call - When talking to Kacey's father, his ego clashed horribly against Matt's attempts to get through to his head, comparing losing a loved one to Chris losing his dog, declaring that mowing the lawn (a menial task at that) was tough work and utterly missing various cues to people's hardships, such as when Matt told him that his mother pulled weeds while inflicted with arthritis, Chris could only apologize for her having arthritis, not be impressed by the feat.
  • Chris and exercise - Many times, Chris has shown his attempts at exercising or performing some sort of strenuous feat. He considered lifting up a chair to be a great feat of strength, thought that lifting two 12-pack boxes was akin to lifting two 50-pound weights and even showed his "amazing" Parkay skills.
  • Chris and famous people - Chris has compared himself to Leonardo DaVinci and Michaelangelo in artistic ability. He has also compared himself in ability or personality to President Barack Obama, Frank Sinatra, Bing Crosby, Red Skelton, Dick van Dyke, Ricky Ricardo, and Jaleel White (who voiced Sonic the Hedgehog). He has also compared himself to many fictional characters such as Optimus Prime, Sonic the Hedgehog, Chun-Li, Homer Simpson and Peter Griffin. Since free-riding on someone else's talents is nothing new for Chris, He saw no issue into incorporating known people in his family tree. This is how Anne Boleyn, Daniel Weston and an unknown Cherokian Clan appeared in his ancestry for no logical reason whatsoever. He pushed the audacity to edit many Wikipedia pages to validate his hubris. All entries have been redacted and he was banned from the site.
  • Chris E-Mails - Chris's massive ego manifests itself eagerly through his correspondence with other people. For example, he e-mailed the O'Reilly Factor, Dateline NBC, and NBC Nightly News at least twice, telling them about his Encyclopedia Dramatica page. Not only did he outright expect them to report on it and give it extensive television coverage, but he expected the FBI (which he also believed was apparently part of the crew for the news shows) to go after Jason Kendrick Howell. Other examples include that while he apologized to Megan for drawing shecameforcwc.jpg, he told her that she owed him money and that he tried to coax Anna McLerran and Megan into vandalizing his ED page for him. He also believed that people thought their ranking on his Scale of Respect was of the utmost importance, as illustrated by his correspondence with Mary Lee Walsh.
  • Chris and his ED Page - Since Chris is a known narcissistic loon, he never liked mirrors of any kind. When the nice folks of Encyclopedia Dramatica found him, they couldn't resist the urge to satirize his own existense. The said article turned into a circus in which he tried to retract, modify, erase and even supply the page with new material. In 17 December 2009, he went as far as copying the main article page out of ED and edited out at his convenience[1].
  • Chris and his own webpage - When Chris was given his own webpage, he found himself bombarded with gay ads, all paid for by Jack Thaddeus. After dealing with this for months on end, Chris has finally had enough and proclaimed that he wrote to currently-standing President Barack Obama in an attempt to make gay ads illegal, despite that that fact that kind of ad is still protected under free speech and even if he got the letter, there's a slim (read: zero) chance that Obama will actually listen to his whiny, fat ass. While addressing the matter, Chris proclaims himself the captain of this boat and says that without him, CWCipedia would not exist, implying that he does all the hard work on the website, ignoring all Sysop's effort. In fact, CWCipedia is a privilege given to Chris and not at all something that he came up with. Chris has taken this to an absolute extreme, going as far as to suggest that he is the "Captain" of CWCipedia.
  • Chris and Health - Chris hates to be called fat. Deep in his mind, he honestly thinks he's the same somewhat skinny child he was ten years ago, despite the fact that he has a gut and his hairline's retreating at an alarming rate. While he refuses to accept his baldness, he actually is claiming to be working on his gut. Beyond that, he refuses professional psychological help and honestly believes stuff such as autism and homosexuality are easily caught diseases.
  • Homosexuality - As mentioned above, Chris actually believes that homosexuality is a disease like AIDS or even the common cold. In his comics, he takes a page out of Family Guy and helps create the cure for homosexuality. Since it questions his own sexuality, he seeks to punish those who are in same-sex relations within CWCVille as well.
  • His Birthday - Chris feels that his birthdate (24 February) should be a national holiday; a "Second Day of Love" for no valid reason whatsoever.

Chris's ego in the Comic

See also: Sub-Episodes

While Issue 0 and Issue 1 do focus on Sonichu, Chris-Chan takes over as the main character throughout Issue 2, Issue 5, Issue 6 and Issue 7, with Sonichu as a supporting character, and even when he does appear, he's shouting some retarded praises about Chris. Issue 8 and Issue 9 sees Sonichu taking back his major role as the main character, but he's basically just a Mary-Sue analogy for Chris. He also portrays himself as skinny and handsome (although this doesn't happen till said Issue 2). and will pull powers out of his ass. He even makes several episodes that dramatize events he had in real-life, with the extreme self indulging fantasies that are described below:

Chris's ego is in full bloom in the comics. The name of the city in which he and his Electric Hedgehog Pokemon strive to protect is known as CWCVille. The city's major currency is C-Quarters and W-Quarters. One of the major drinks in this city is known as CWC Cola. The Sonichus and Rosechus he created proclaim him "father". No one in his city cares if he slacks off from his job as Mayor. He even goes so far as to proclaim that there are no elections when he proclaims BILLY MAYS is NOT the TRUE and HONEST mayor of CWCville.

Instances of Chris's ego in the comics

  • Sonichu 1: While this is the smallest amount of screen time he's ever had in the comics, he generally steals the scene to himself, Sonichu tries to make a point about how "creative" the comics are if that, and generally trying to make it seem like he deserves a girlfriend for drawing this retarded piece of fail.
  • Sonichu 2: His portrayal of Wes-Li counts, despite not really knowing Chris in real life he still gets portrayed as a villain. He also openly admitted he didn't want Sarah to see anyone else in a text-walling portion of the comic, yet still calls Wes-Li greedy for not wanting to be a part in CWC's retarded conversations. He also draws Sarah pinning Wes-Li to a tree & breaking up with him, just because she thought Chris being jealous of her was sweet. He is also drawn whining about how he lost Sarah, and essential tells Wes to "buck up", even though he's the first one to make a scream when he lost a one-time date. Mary Lee Walsh also appears as a villain.
  • Sonichu 3: This issue has a semi-fictionalized account of an incident Chris had with the managers of McDonald's. He was loitering and soliciting, and they threw him out. In his comic book, however, Chris exclaims that the Jerkops are conspiring against him, preventing him from finding true love. He turns into a furfag Chris-Chan Sonichu and defeats them with the help of Darkbind Sonichu, who admits he only helped because Chris was his creator.
An entire book of Chris hurting people he hates
  • Sonichu 4: It's all about Chris here. Sonichu and Rosechu are nowhere to be seen, except for one cameo each in separate sub-episodes. This issue was all about Chris's semi-fictionalized misadventures at Wal-Mart, Target and McDonald's, and pitted him constantly against the Jerkops and Mary Lee Walsh, for they dare to interfere with his Love Quest. Unlike IRL, Chris can (and does) pwn them in the fantasy world of his comics. This issue also includes the account of Chris's encounter with IRL troll Hannah, who raised his heart level to 100% just to smash it down to 15%.
  • Sonichu 5: This issue has Chris write Sarah Hammer out of the comic so he could focus exclusively on Megan Schroeder, the new object of his desire. While Sarah did marry a man named William Spicer, Chris was not present at her wedding, and had never met Spicer, as he was represented in the comic by a generic Yu-Gi-Oh character. The next episode has Chris fawning over Megan, and she over him. However, in reality, Megan saw Chris only as a friend, and was constantly rebuffing his advances. The episode features two different endings because Megan either did not like the original ending or objected to being featured in the comic at all.
  • Sonichu 6: The Patti Chandler Memorial Issue, where his dead dog becomes a member of CWCville. In the only other episode in this issue, Chris has Bionic ask him to create a sweetheart for him, but Chris, being a lazy fuck, hooks him up with Megan's character, Megagi. Chris would later claim Megan's character as his own.
Chris as he is vs. Chris as he sees himself.
  • Sonichu 7: Chris is envious of Bionic's ability to screw Megagi until Megan holds his hand, again implying romance where none exists. This issue contains the stupid time-travel plot where they go back in time to the the moment Chris created Bionic, and the scene randomly segues into a Family Guy style scene he gives Seth McFarlane full permission to use (Coincidentally, or not, the first few minutes of the Road to Germany episode of Family Guy bears a close resemblance to this "skitch"). After Chris gets trapped in the time void, he mixes both fake memories from the comic with real ones, like Megan "dumping" him and his denial of having drawn Shecameforcwc.jpg (he blames it on ED, even though he was the one that drew it and uploaded it onto that site), Mary Lee Walsh's invasion of CWCville and her defeat at the hands of the Sonichus and Rosechus, and Joshua Martinez hooking him up with Vanessa Hudgens. In the other episode, he introduces his Sweetheart-of-the-moment Blanca and her creation Jiggliami (who Chris would later claim as his own), as well as featuring an interview with anti-troll Robert Simmons V about how awesome Chris is.
Chris rends space time asunder to punch some guy.
  • Sonichu 8: While free of Chris the character, the comic was not free of Chris's warped psyche. He drew a sex scene between Sonichu and Rosechu for no other reason than to draw porn of his characters, and gave a detailed account of their reproductive systems. Remember, Sonichu is supposed to be a children's comic, as Chris has stated numerous times. After having his characters have sex for the fifty billionth time, he inserts the hideous Rule 34 he drew into the storyline by having Rosechu come across it while using the internet. In a blatant display of Mary Sueism, Chris uses Sonichu to comment on his hideous drawings by saying that they are "so lifelike", and he also has Sonichu gag and barf at the sight of fan drawings from Chris's ED page of Rosechu with a "pickle". Next there are multiple (traced) nude images of Rosechu, which the plot indicates is to prove that she doesn't have a "pickle". Later on, after Sonichu and Rosechu storm 4-cent_garbage.com (which is a thinly veiled portrayal of ED), she strips again and face-rapes Jason Kendrick Howell (the guy who created Chris's ED page), putting him into a state close to death. Even later, all the Rosechus in the comics decide to strip for "Women's Rights"...well, all except one underaged one, who can't strip because of the "dumb laws". It must be noted that this entire storyline was a result of Chris being trolled hard by the people over at ED, who drew fan art of Rosechu with a dick to make Chris RAGE...and RAGE he did. An epilogue has former sweetheart Sarah Jackson killed by Optimus Prime; another former sweetheart, Blanca, returned to Kentucky and her boyfriend (which makes no fucking sense storyline wise; truth is that she was a troll and Chris failed at writing her out); a two sentence memorial to Ryan Cash; and a dedication to Sweetheart-of-the-moment PandaHalo.
They're better off without him.
  • Sonichu 9: Lacking Sonichu to use as his mouthpiece, Chris invented Reginald Sneasel to use as his stand-in during the first episode, and Reginald even goes to retarded lengths to break up a romance between Punchy and Layla in a similar way that Chris meddled with Wes and Sarah. After Reginald's plan fails, Angelica Rosechu approaches him, and they quickly jump into the sack together, echoing Chris's own belief that the woman must make the first move (out of pity) and put out as soon as possible. This episode also introduces Chris's retarded Dating Education concept and applies it to his characters. Chris also inserts his Sweetheart-of-the-moment Ivy into the comics in a plotline that goes nowhere, and has a thinly-veiled version of former sweetheart Sarah Jackson as the Date Ed teacher. Chris then makes a callous reference to Sarah's death by Optimus Prime via a representation of her sister Rita. When Rita informs the class about her sister's death, the assorted characters appear to not give a fuck, nor do they make any attempt to console the poor grieving woman that is now stuck teaching their class. Also in Sonichu 9, Chris depicts PandaHalo dying in a fire. He seems to think this is a fitting tribute. He also shopped a caricature of himself onto a billboard in the background, with a caption begging him to return to the mayor's office. Recent additions have shown the addition of a Power Rangers team, the CWC-Power Rangers, as well as a gruesome description of Ivy dying by being hanged as well as BILLY MAYS falling to his death trying to save her.
  • Sonichu 10 With Chris back in the saddle, he proceed with his master plan to get rid of all of those who troubled him in real life. Even worse, he apparently was able to deceive his future wife into think he was his future self and did the nasty with her. On top of this, he proclaims that he helped create the cure for autism homosexuality and plans to bring about straightness by stealing all those vaccines, bringing them to the present and distributing them right there! Chris-Chan Sonichu defeats some "devil trolls", but can't resist imitating Zorro and spelling "CWC" in the air with his epic blows and kicks (this could be a trifecta: unoriginal, egoistic and physically implausible). As the comic continues on, he attacks the 4-cent_garbage HQ, he uses the characters Jason Kendrick Howell and Beel to condemn Clyde Cash and Jack Thaddeus for being homo trolls who "slander and tarnish an innocent man's good name", the proceeds to make the latter two jump to their deaths, just as he wishes. Even more, he destroys the building, kills about 200 trolls and proclaims that both ED and 4-cent_garbage's websites were lost forever, despite the fact that most websites nowadays have back ups waiting for just such an emergency. Soon after, Magi-Chan returns from the future, reporting that the gay vaccine has/will be proven to be a worldwide success and that February 24th, 2009, Christian's birthday, will be be proclaimed Christian Love Day in his honor. Yes, really.
  • Sonichu Special 4: Chris steals Kacey from Liquid for "not treating her right", bursts into the house (note that Kacey doesn't seem to be in any real danger), and friggin' shoots a disarmed Liquid with a gun, and draws Kacey's military family telling praises about Chris, and generally negative comments towards Liquid.

References


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