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Wes Iseli

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Wes is a magician and regretfully, Sarah's boyfriend. Because of this, Christian is very jealous and dislikes him much.
 

 

Wes Iseli Animal Crossing card


Wes Iseli: party magician, charity worker, married man, and evil hedgehog.

Wes Iseli (pronounced [wɛs ˈaɪzli])[1] (born 10 November 1977) briefly dated Sarah Hammer, Chris's long-time gal-pal. Wes is a magician in real life (available for birthdays, weddings, funerals and bar mitzvahs) and is currently married to another woman.

Although trolls have been trying to contact Wes ever since they found his various online accounts, he hasn't offered any official statements on Chris or his involvement in the Sonichu comics. Apparently, he doesn't feel the need to talk shit about some guy he barely knew just because he was jealous of Wes's relationship with an ex-girlfriend of his.

In real life

Wes Iseli was known to have dated Sarah Hammer at some point during Chris's High School years. Chris claims to have originally been provoked into his Love Quest after becoming enraged at seeing Sarah sitting on Wes's lap. Much like with Mary Lee Walsh, this lead to a one sided blood feud with him, and he began to see Wes as a romantic rival and an enemy, even though Sarah saw Chris as nothing more than a friend and Wes himself probably barely even knew Chris as anything other than "that autistic kid Sarah hangs out with".

The trio of Sonichu, Rosechu and Black Sonichu in Chris's early ideas before the comic started, existed to represent the "hero, lover and rival" triangle that Chris believed himself, Sarah and Wes to fulfill as well, with Chris obviously cast as the hero, and Wes as the villain. This is evident in the Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares story, in which he represented himself and Sarah as Sonichu and Rosechu, and when Wes was brought up in passing, Chris included a drawing of Blake holding a magic wand and magician's hat, complete with helpful annotation pointing out that he was evil. Chris would later come up with unique Sonichu forms for himself, Wes and Sarah instead of using Sonichu, Rosechu and Blake as stand-ins, and these new Sonichu forms would go on to be featured in the Sonichu comics.

Chris also included avatars of Wes in his homemade Animal Crossing and Yu-Gi-Oh! cards, for both his human form and his Sonichu form in each, (though in the Yu-Gi-Oh! cards the human Wes Iseli was just named as "A Jerk").

Wes (under comic alias Walter Grisby) was mentioned in the infamous Chris Loses It video. In that video, Chris, after performing a spectacular act of tard rage, pretends to call Walter Grisby, asking him "Who threw the frisbee?", before yelling at the telephone and throwing it at the PSEye.

In the comic

Wes-Li is pissed.

As the author of the comic, when Chris first made Sonichu #2 he was given the unique opportunity to revise his personal history with Wes at his leisure. Comic Wes differs from his real life counterpart in that whilst the real Wes Iseli broke up with Sarah, moved on, married another woman, probably forgot Chris ever existed and is now running a charity which helps fight Parkinson's Disease, Comic Wes appears to have held a grudge against Chris ever since he first met him while he was dating Sarah, in spite of Chris having nothing he wanted and Wes having no reason to care about Chris. Dialogue also indicates that he was still dating Sarah by the time the trio first gained their powers, as Sarah "breaks up" with him halfway through Episode 8.

Wesley Iseli/Walter Grisby

Wes Iseli (later retconned as "Walter Grisby") was one of the chosen three of the Anchuent Prophecy, alongside Christian Weston Chandler and Sarah Nicole Hammer. Wes learned that he was the descendant of the Wasabi Clan, and upon gaining his powers his own ancestor implored him to take vengeance upon the Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan, who was now Chris. Wes, knowing of Chris's jealousy towards him, accepts.

He later finds both Chris and Sonichu out on the "rough terrain" just outside CWCville, and the two fight, not only over their current feud, but also over the Cherokee/Wasabi war in the ancient past, over the Cherokian Crown. Wes grabs the crown out of thin air during the fight (implying he stole it from Chris, which was never depicted and eventually the fight ends when Sarah appears and pins Wes against a tree with a lightning arrow, just as he was about to defeat Chris. Sarah breaks up with him, he whines a bit, Chris tells him to suck it up and move on, and he then unites with Chris and Sarah to defeat the golem summoned by Mary Lee Walsh and Count Graduon.

Wes-Li Sonichu apparently grows to about 20 feet tall, does an Edward G. Robinson impression, and kidnaps Sarah Hammer in Sonichu #5

In Sonichu #5 he appeared again to use his magical powers to kidnap Sarah at her wedding to William Spicer. Despite ostensibly not wanting to be kidnapped, Sarah neglects to employ any of her Anchuent powers, and thus Chris must take him down. This being the early days of the Megan Saga, Chris drew heavily from anime themes in this issue, so Chris and Wes did battle via children's card games rather than an actual fight. Chris loses (again), proving for a second time that Wes was a superior fighter to him, but he and Sarah are saved by Sailor Megtune and Megagi La Skunk, and the wedding continues without issue.

Iseli was briefly seen in Sonichu #7, attending the conference of villains following Christian's disappearance into the Time Void. Given that the conference was run by Mary and Count Graduon, the evil that Wes was destined to defeat alongside Chris and Sarah, the prophecy seems to have gone horribly wrong. Chris, naturally, does not address this.

Wes was last seen in the comic in Sonichu #9, appearing on a grand total of two pages. First early in the issue, where he was seen scouting around the city in preparation for the PVCC attack, assisted by Reldnahc Ha-Taque and Silvana, and later on again, when he calls Mary and tells her that a magic dome was protecting the CWCville Shopping Center from attack, and that they needed Mary to come down there personally to get through. He is never seen fighting in this issue, and it is to date his final appearance.

Still to this day, Wes's final fate remains unknown. Whether he was counted among the brainwashing victims freed by Chris or not has never been stated, and depending on whether or not Wes was acting of his own free will in helping Mary and the PVCC, he may or may not be the last surviving villain other than Clawdorf and Metal Sonichu after the Sonichu #10 purge.

Wes-Li Sonichu

Wes-li's Flame Sniper (left) compared to Sailor Mars' Flame Sniper (right).

Wes-Li Sonichu (pronounced [wɛzlaɪ], "Wez-lie", according to Chris's videobooks, and as "Wesley" according to the Audiobooks) is the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon form of Wes Iseli when he is transformed by the Fireshock Pendant empowered by the Anchuent Prophecy. Although the prophecy foretold that Wes-Li, Chris-Chan, and Saramah would work together to defeat Count Graduon, Wes's spitefulness toward Chris and his bitterness at having been rejected by Sarah Hammer would lead him to use his powers for evil.

Prior to the retcon, Wes-Li was a passable pun. With the name change, it makes absolutely no sense that a person named "Walter Grisby" would have an alter ego that does not resemble his name in any way - unless one knows the background of this character.

As he is not featured much, Wes-Li Sonichu is not seen to possess anything like the absurdly vast array of powers that Chris-Chan Sonichu does. He is however, seen using the Pokémon moves Fire Blast, Flamethrower, Mega Kick and Sky Uppercut, as well as a move known as the Flame Sniper, in which he uses a bow and arrow made of fire to shoot at a target. The name and attack itself are another rip-off from Sailor Moon. With help from Chris-Chan and Saramah, Wes-Li can also use the "Team Blast: Blue Fireball Attack", but being the stupid Deus Ex Machina finishing move it is, the attack is used only once to destroy Graduon's golem and is never used again. It is also ripped off from Sonic Heroes.

Wasabi Rival

The Wasabi Rival or the Pope? YOU DECIDE!

The Wasabi Rival was the ancient alter ego of Wes Iseli in the Sonichu comics. According to Sonichu 2, the Wasabi Clan were contemporaries of the Ancient Cherokee. One of the Wasabi, presumably a leader figure of some sort, somehow determined that stealing the Cherokian Crown from his rival would allow him and his tribe to rule the world. This led to a bitter rivalry between the ambitious Wasabi man and the Cherokian Leader. Despite their differences, the Cherokian Leader and his Wasabi Rival were eventually able to forge a temporary alliance against the greater menace of Count Graduon. Together, the Wasabi and Cherokee defeated Graduon, imprisoning him within a magic scepter for centuries.

Years later, when the Anchuent Prophecy was at last fulfilled, the Wasabi Rival appeared in a vision to his reincarnation, Wes Iseli, in order to instruct him in use of the Fireshock Pendant. Exactly how and why the Wasabi Rival is able to communicate with Wes like this is not explained. He teaches Wes how to use all his powers and sends him off to his first battle.

Notably, even though the entire reason Wes had the powers at all was because Count Graduon had come back and needed to be stopped again, something the Wasabi Rival should have known was the priority at that moment, he still told Wes to go after Chris and steal the Cherokian Crown anyway. Either that crown is really, really important, or the Wasabi Rival just enjoys being a douche from beyond the grave.

Gallery

Sources

  1. Mumble 4, around 22 minutes in

External links