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Red Skelton

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I've also learned from Red Skelton of how to be a gentleman.
 

 

—Chris, in a post on Sonichu Girls

Luckily, he never lived to find out about his biggest fan.

Richard Bernard "Red" Skelton (1913-1997) was a popular American TV and movie comic of the mid-20th century. Originally a circus clown and vaudeville comedian, he parlayed his talents as a funnyman into a successful screen career spanning almost five decades.

In keeping with his often anachronistic taste in entertainment, Chris is an avowed fan of Skelton's comedy. (Coincidentally, Skelton's first TV show hit the airwaves in 1951, the same year as I Love Lucy, another Chandler family favorite.) He often claims to have used Skelton as a role model as far as learning how to effectively interact in social situations.

Exactly what he's learned from Skelton, though, is something of a mystery. On the Sonichu Girls forum, he talked about learning "how to be a gentleman," but didn't go into detail about what gentlemanly traits he picked up from Red. Likewise, on his DVD, he claims to have developed "a positive social behavior similar to Red Skelton" during high school, but doesn't offer any more details than that.

Some of Chris's comments from an IRC chat in December 2008 go into a bit more depth. There, Chris explains that Skelton taught him "how to be a more hospitable gentleman for one thing…how to speak with a softer tone of voice in pleasant conversation, and some fun jokes as well."

He also butchered a Skelton routine in Some Favored Comedians.

Whatever Chris learned from Skelton about how to relate to other people, in any event, it manifestly hasn't done him any good.

Skelton is apparently a regular attraction in the restaurant at Hotel Ricky Ricardo, despite having died in 1997.

List of males Chris doesn't hate, according to Chris

I. Chris II. Bob Chandler III. Santa Clause IV. Jesus V. God

VI. The President of the United States:
Barack Obama (as of 2009)

VII. All the World Leaders:
Kim Jong UnMahmoud AhmadinejadManuel Noriega

VIII. ALL male acquaintances and friends, past and present:
Cole SmitheyDr. David Alan ChandlerJonathan CareyUncle Raymond
Joshua MartinezJoseph HerringWes IseliLucasMimmsRobert Simmons V (as of 2009)

List of males Chris doesn't hate, corrected for accuracy

I. Chris II. Bob Chandler III. Santa Clause IV. Jesus V. God VI. The Bear

VII. The former Presidents of the United States:
George W. BushBarack Obama

VIII. Select male acquaintances and friends, past and present:
Robert Simmons VKenneth Erwin EnglehardtWilliam Elliott Waterman

IX. Celebrities:
Jack BlackJerry SeinfeldRed SkeltonR.L. StineSeth MacFarlaneVarious comedians

X. Robots:
MegatronOptimus Prime

XI. Hedgehogs:
Sonic the HedgehogBionic the Hedgehog

XII. Electric Hedgehog Pokémon:
Sonichu (Ultra SonichuMetonic)
Wild SonichuPunchy SonichuMagi-ChanBlakeDJ JamstaBlazeBob SonichuMitch SonichuDarkbind Sonichu

XIII. Pornstars:
Bailey Jay

List of males Chris does hate

JERKS