The Captain

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LukasMedallion.jpeg Troll disclosure: Some events in this article take place from October through December 2018, when the Teen Troon Squad had access to Chris's CWCSonichu Twitter account and posted several tweets without his knowledge or consent. Tweets covered on this page may or may not be written by Chris.

For more information, see 2018 Twitter account compromise.

He now regularly speaks and is on friendly terms @Null, @Marvin and I as a result of all of this and we've been actively monitoring his accounts so that something like [The Idea Guys] doesn't (or is less likely) to happen again, as well as coaching Chris on how to better handle/protect his social media.
The Captain[1]
If I was mentally ill, then the Captain would be too, because he has personally met Magi-Chan, and a whole lot of other people have seen him with me as well. There is no mental illness amongst us; all this is real. ⚡️💙⚡️
Chris, showing the issues with validating his beliefs[2]

The Captain
Name Jack
Also known as Captain Jack
Gender Male
Saga Idea Guy, Guard Dog, TTS

The Captain, real name Jack[3] (last name omitted) is a former advisor and middleman for Chris following from some of the events that followed from Chris's influence from the Idea Guys. For quite some time, he had documented what was happening with Chris behind the scenes to Kiwi Farms.

Being one of three members in a group dubbed by observers as the "Guard Dogs," a group created to protect Chris from potential trolls and enablers, The Captain had also played a significant role in ending influence from the Idea Guys onto Chris.

Stopping the Idea Guys

Photoshop of the Amnyfest Ring

In April 2018, Chris would face the worst of the Idea Guys's manipulative tactics, with them threatening to kill characters in CWCville, unless Chris gave them large sums of money. This got to the point where Chris started to sell his belongings on eBay in order to keep up with their requests. One of these items was the Amnyfest Ring, which he put on sale on 14 April for $10,000[4]. For obvious reasons, no-one bought this.

On April 17, The Captain asked if he could buy the ring for $200, which Chris accepted. The Captain initially bought the ring for what seemed to be cosmetic reasons, with no ulterior motive. However, he was shortly after contacted by "some people close to Chris," who told him that Chris was being manipulated, but was refusing to give them any details about it. Captain's suspicions were also raised upon seeing Sonichu Special 5, where all the Sonichu characters were seen saddened by Chris giving the ring away, which tipped him off that the sale was involuntary.

Despite the transaction being over, The Captain continued talking to Chris, enabling his delusions in order to gain his trust. Eventually, Captain sent him a photoshopped image of the ring glowing, telling Chris that it was sending him Morse code messages. He followed this up by a note in his notepad that read, "The CPUs have been hacked. Don't trust the CPUs," and claimed that was the secret message.

Not even a few days later (the day after it came in the mail), I find out about Chris' odd behavior (see the Wise and Boyd post) and think to myself what could I do to help?

So it dawned on me - Chris is really big on shamanism and symbols (thanks @Marvin) so I simply told him that the ring was sending me morse code messages and that the idiots in Discord were lying to him. So I did a five minute photoshop of the ring glowing and sent it to Chris as well as a piece of notepaper where I wrote "The CPUs have been hacked. Don't trust the CPUs" claiming that was the morse code message.[5]

After this, he had a 20-minute phone call with Chris, where he told Chris that the ring was in fact the "Reality Stone," a magical object that could instantly transform CWCville into whatever he wanted it to be. Captain reasoned that while this was once again enabling, it was a necessary evil, as the existence of the "Reality Stone" blocked out all trolls who tried to mess with CWCville, as Chris could instantly undo the damage. Chris trusted the Captain, and gave him his Discord and all his other accounts passwords, so he could "scan for viruses."

It was a way to quickly and easily shut the trolls out. The ring is sending me messages: the Discord fags are bad. Also, the ring is reallllly the reality stone, and you can use it to "undo" everything that they've done! It got me (and subsequently Marvin and Null) in, and the trolls out, all in a 20 minute phone call. Within an hour they were shut out of everything and we had full access to every aspect of his social media.[6]

When Captain logged on, he was completely appalled by the obvious manipulation and extortion by the Idea Guys. He quickly told Marvin about the situation, who started coaching Captain on how to talk like Chris, so he could communicate to the Idea Guys while Marvin formed a plan. Chris also coached The Captain, by giving him info on himself so Captain could imitate him better. The Idea Guys became skeptical of The Captain at one point, and told him to write a message on a dry erase board to prove he was really Chris. The Captain told Chris to write on the board, which Chris did, and Captain forwarded the images to the Idea Guys. Eventually, Marvin built a script to rip all the chat logs from the Discord, and The Captain went completely silent in the Discord, leading to the Idea Guys freaking out.

The Captain later sent the ring back to Chris, due to his need for money and the fact that its sale was involuntary.

The Chris-Chan Extortionists

Main article: The Chris-Chan Extortionists

On 11 July 2018, Null made a thread on Kiwi Farms titled "The Chris-Chan Extortionists," where he discussed the Idea Guys Saga. The Captain posted in the thread, adding his own info about the subject.

Basically, some people close to Chris contacted me in late April and told me that they thought Chris might be being manipulated and/or extorted, but he was being mum about things and wouldn't give them any information. I then contacted Chris and by playing into his delusion about the CPUs, ponys and other shit convinced him that I was trustworthy. He informed me about the top-secret Discord chat and after a little bit more discussion, gave me his new username and password. They had originally been talking to Chris using his CWCSonichu Discord, but sometime in late 2017/early 2018 convinced him to make a new account and to join a new private server in an attempt to avoid detection.

After Chris gave me access to his Discord, he then gave me access to every other account he owned in an attempt to scan for "viruses" - this would later prove instrumental towards building up the evidence that we have. When I logged onto the Discord I was appalled - the level of absurdity that these guys had gone to in order to take advantage of Chris was beyond belief. I saw the constant requests for money, threats, blackmail, etc. and Chris' responses and was simply floored. They were forcing Chris to post videos, Twitter statuses, etc. all in order to get their kicks in addition to the constant requests for money. They had also forced Chris to record a series of videos to his Google Drive in which he beats himself, called himself names, gives a tour of his house (complete with a sleeping Barb), and "other" videos in order to use them as leverage against him in the future. They even forced him record a two hour video of himself watching rather grotesque pornography as a "reaction" type video.

Essentially what went on for months was a series of "wash, rinse, repeat" in which Joshua Wise and Stephen Boyd threaten some random Sonichu/Pony/CPU character and Chris responds with videos, money, etc. in order to save them. At this point I have Chris messaging me multiple times a day and I'm very aware that I've witnessed a very serious crime and I did what anyone else would do in a situation like this that's over their head - I went to @Marvin with everything. He started coaching me on how to talk to Chris and had me stall (i.e. roleplay as Chris) in the Discord chat. He also recommended that I ask Chris to take a break from the internet for a week while we did this and he did. He started watching and catching up with all of the TV shows he was told he was "banned" from watching by Wise and Boyd.

During this time I continued talking with Wise and Boyd just enough so that they wouldn't get spooked. If they asked me something I didn't know, I would go to Marvin and/or Chris about it and reply accordingly. At one point they wanted Chris to post photographic evidence that he was indeed himself, writing a message on a dry erase board. I had Chris take said picture for me and then forwarded it to them, etc. Eventually, @Marvin built a script to rip the chat logs from Discord, which amounted to hundreds of pages of autistic debauchery in which these speds took advantage of Chris. When the script was finished and we had the chat logs and images we simply went silent on the Discord and a couple days later Wise and Boyd got freaked out and attempted to sanitize it, banning Chris from the channel and deleting every private message they had sent him one by one.

At the half-way point during all of this @Null had been brought into the picture and was being updated on our progress, what was being said, etc. He stuck his own neck out there and filed the reports with the FBI, Greene County Sheriff, called Boyd's mother, etc. Chris had also taken steps at this point towards assisting in any future investigation, including getting a new phone number, forwarding Null, Marvin and I ALL suspicious incoming messages, giving full access to his accounts, etc. He also collected all of the receipts from Food Lion, which he bought Amazon/GameStop gift cards with, and sent us screenshots of his GameStop order history in which he had sent PS Vitas, the Gwen statue, etc. to both Wise and Boyd's personal addresses.

And then everything just sort of settled down for several weeks. At one point Chris received some texts from either Boyd or Wise attempting to roleplay the Dark Tower with him, to which Chris replied, "I'll do it for $6,000!" and naturally, they didn't message again. Chris encountered some really serious monetary issues as a result of this, and at one point was two months behind on his mortgage payments with foreclosure looming. He now regularly speaks and is on friendly terms @Null, @Marvin and I as a result of all of this and we've been actively monitoring his accounts so that something like this doesn't (or is less likely) to happen again, as well as coaching Chris on how to better handle/protect his social media.

It's a shame that law enforcement hasn't done something with this as with everything we have it really is a slam dunk. At our insistence Chris did drop off things to the Greene County sheriff and sent us a copy of the report, but they didn't seem to do anything with it.

So, here we are today.. this should fill in some significant gaps that people have been scratching their head about as of late, i.e. Operation Kingsnake, the weird Twitter posts, videos, etc. earlier this year, the Null pony picture, blah blah blah.

Start of the Guard Dogs

A TSSSF card of The Captain.

Even after the Idea Guys were taken out of power, The Captain continued to be concerned for Chris's health. Fortunately, he was not alone in this, as Marvin and Null were also worried about Chris. He had accidentally formed a new group of people, The Guard Dogs, who protected Chris from people similiar to the Idea Guys. The Captain was one of the more active members of the group, calling and texting Chris daily to advise him on topics, along with monitoring his accounts.

While almost all of their interactions weren't publicized, it can be wagered that they are similiar to the Null DMs, where it mostly consists of Chris spewing CPU nonsense, with Null trying to steer the conversation back to a more desirable topic. The Captain has described some of his phone calls with Chris, including one where Chris covered the receiver to randomly start screaming[7], and another where Barb interrupted to scream at Chris[8]. He also had a phone call Bryanfrogboy, explaining the Idea Guys Saga to him and helping him better his relationship with Chris.

On 16 September 2018, The Captain wrote on Kiwi Farms that he had finally broke it to Chris that his delusions aren't real.

Chris reaches out to me every few days or so but stopped the daily communication when I straight up told him the a alt-dimension stuff was a bunch of nonsense and I only used the ring flashing signals thing to get him to trust me. Even then he kept reaching out and I finally just said "leave me alone until you're ready to help yourself and drop the dimensional delusional nonsense."

I did ask who gave him the Fanta idea and he simply didn't reply. He does still trust me but I refuse to get deeply involved at this point. If he just won't straight up tell me I'm not making up another story about CPUs and Magi-Chan sending coded messages to get him to spill it.

I helped catch Wise and Boyd, assisted Null and Marvin in combing through his social media, etc. My good deed is done.[9]

Despite seemingly retiring from protecting Chris, he returned only a few weeks later, after Chris made a tweet where he mentioned moving to Hawaii to attend a protest against Donald Trump. The Captain discouraged this in DMs[10].

Contact with Megan Schroeder

On 17 October 2018, Chris made a tweet saying that if he got enough donations, he would visit his former friend Megan Schroeder[11]. The Captain then DMed Megan, informing her of these tweets. Megan responded by telling Captain that she had guns, and asked him to relay that to Chris, which he did. Upon finding out that Megan had guns, Chris declared on Twitter that he would not be visiting her[12].

I spoke with Megan, told her about the tweets and she said she has guns and asked me to let him know.

So that's exactly what I did. I don't want Chris shot.[13]

After this, The Captain described receiving a "wall of text" about Megan.

Currently receiving a wall-o-text about Megan.

Apparently her soul or something rests inside of a Nintendo console that was only released in Germany. All she has to do is state the name of said console and she will transform into a computer? Or the console? It really doesn't make much sense to me.

This REEKS of Idea Guy influence.[14]

A week later, Chris made a new video, Dimensional Merge Announcements, where he directly addressed Megan. He announced that she was "CPU Red Heart" and a goddess, along with more delusions he had about her. Chris texted The Captain, asking him to show the video to Megan, as Captain had previously communicated with her.

This video legitimately makes me sad.

He's very muted here.. totally not like him at all.

He did text me asking me to send it to Megan so I did.. I'm waiting for her response.

Edit: She's genuinely touched and really liked whoever is posting as Donald Trump. She feels bad for Chris but will not be meeting up with him under any circumstances.[15]

Liza, Patches and Sylvia

The Captain held the strong opinion that Chris wasn't abusing his cats, and wrote posts about the cats often on Kiwi Farms

He's not abusing the cats, end of story.[16]

However, his good will for Chris was challenge when he adopted three stray kittens who he named Liza, Patches and Sylvia. All three of them had pink eye, and he was clearly incapable of taking care of them. He later begged for money, claiming that he was unable to pay for their medicine, and had to use Patches's medicine for all of them.

The Captain was infuriated by this.

Why do you think I'm posting it? I'm furious.[17]

The Captain was contacted by a Kiwi Farms user who lived very close to Chris, and he offered to take them to a no-kill shelter. However, Chris refused:

Someone on the forum who knows Chris from a local card shop offered to go to his house tomorrow and take them to a no-kill shelter.

Chris said no and that Magi-Chan has stated in "his" infinite wisdom that the animals are safer with him than anywhere else.[18]

Chris started getting flamed from people online because of his irresponsibility.

I'm not sure what's going on. Chris isn't answering my messages this morning. But I'm glad he's getting all of this heat. From what I could tell last night he was having an autismo breakdown under all the pressure.

Caught him lying multiple times in the last few days.[19]

Eventually, The Captain was contacted by another Kiwi Farms user who offered to take care of Liza. She was an IRL nurse with a son who wanted an orange cat.

She's a good person, a registered nurse, and that's all that really needs to be known.[20]

The Captain also tried to get an adoptee for Sylvia, but Chris was strongly against it.

If anyone local to Charlottesville wants the black and white female, let me know. I think I can convince Chris to adopt her out.

Edit: he is staunchly against the shelter.[21]

Patches died shortly after, though The Captain reasoned that people weren't to be angry at his death.

Chris has informed me that Patches died in his arms late last night.

He had taken him to the vet just the day prior and truly did everything he could to help the cat.

I'm posting here before it makes it to Twitter to hopefully mitigate the obvious backlash that will come.. He did everything he could[22].

He took it to the vet multiple times. Blame the vet for not admitting it if you want to point fingers.

Chris did everything right in regards to their care. Sometimes things like this just happen.[23]

The Captain kept in contact with the nurse who adopted Liza, and gave updates to her situation on Kiwi Farms. It was also revealed that Liza was not a girl, but a boy.

Liza is actually doing well after getting a regimen of antibiotics and such. His new owner suspects they actually have pneumonia and the conjunctivitis is simply a symptom.[24]

Captain's final update revealed that he had renamed to Tingles[25].

I'd like everybody to meet "Tingles" - the first verified survivor in the history of the horde since the shitty legendary film critic Cole Smithey!


End of Involvement

After being asked why Chris was still communicating with him even after Captain stopped enabling him, The Captain made a post on Kiwi Farms mentioning "IRL friends" who enabled him. He's most likely referring to the Teen Troon Squad, judging by what he says.

Basically he did what he's done to others (@LoveYouLongTime, @Marvin) before.. he ignores you for a couple weeks and then comes skulking back.

Right now I'm trying to coax him into telling his therapist(s)/mother/other IRL friends about what's going on so that they can delegitimize said ideas.

Unfortunately, he has three other IRL "friends" that are openly endorsing said ideations so it's become a thin line to walk.

If he were to go silent on me again it might very well be forever as he'd have said IRL "friends" to go back to that would continue this current mess.

On 20 November 2018, The Captain announced on Kiwi Farms that he was taking a break.[26] This was his last post on Kiwi Farms.

On 25 December 2018, someone hacked into Chris's Twitter account, and claimed to be Magi-Chan in Lukas's body, with Lukas being the most prominent member of the Teen Troon Squad. "Magi-Chan" then linked to a Pastebin, elaborately doxing Lukas, by posting his full name, home address, and phone number.[27]

I have really enjoyed my time in your universe. I want to give thanks to my host body in your world, Lukas Simpkins. (Legal name: Lillie Celeste Simpkins.) I want everyone to know what a gracious host they were. Lukas and Christine and I (and some of our friends) had lots of fun hanging out with Christine and smoking weed. We used to do it in their old house, but she just moved to a new house at [REDACTED]. I'm sad I won't be able to smoke weed there until after the merge. If you want to give Lukas a call to let her know how cool she is, she'd really appreciate it. Her number is [REDACTED].

To this day, the hacker has never been publicly determined. Lukas accused The Captain of the dox, and attempted to dox The Captain by posting his alleged age range and phone number on Twitter.

besides! chris chans new little friend, the Captian, is the lovely person that doxxed me. hes in his late 30s and heres his phone number

434 [REDACTED][28]

Lukas later deleted all of his tweets.

The Captain appeared on Kiwi Farms on 26 December 2018 to browse but did not post.

In a tweet from 3 January 2019, Chris referred to the influence The Captain had on him, unwittingly pointing out the issue with enabling his fantasy beliefs, as Chris seized on The Captain's role-playing, which he had done when counteracting the Idea Guys, to claim that he was not mentally ill.

If I was mentally ill, then the Captain would be too, because he has personally met Magi-Chan, and a whole lot of other people have seen him with me as well. There is no mental illness amongst us; all this is real. ⚡️💙⚡️[29]

See also


  1. The Chris-Chan Extortionists
  2. January 2019 social media posts#Accusing fan's OC of attempted assassination
  3. Null DMs#Personal space talk
  5. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Amnyfest Ring
  6. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Reality Stone
  7. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Identity Crisis
  8. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Barb
  9. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Dropping the act
  10. Captain DMs
  11. October 2018 social media posts#Donation drive to see Megan
  12. October 2018 social media posts#Megan's got dat stick
  13. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Megan's Guns
  14. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Megan is a Console
  15. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Captain texts Megan
  16. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Chandler Cats
  18. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Liza Updates
  21. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Liza Updates
  22. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Death of Patches
  24. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Liza Updates
  25. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Liza Updates
  26. Kiwi Farms posts (The Captain)#Taking a Break
  28. File:Twitter-26Dec2018 - Lukas accuses The Captain.jpeg
  29. January 2019 social media posts#Accusing fan's OC of attempted assassination
Idea guy saga.png Idea Guy Saga Idea guy saga.png
The Players

People: ChrisIdea Guys (Joshua WiseStephen BoydUnnamed Others) • Guard Dogs • (The CaptainNullMarvin) • Anna McLerranTings Tingz
Fictional Characters: John YamadaGwen MikotoGruppenfuhrer FegeleinMagi-chanCryzelKun T’NyugetMewtwoPitohuiBundychuAkan

The Concepts: The Chats: The Videos:
Coinciding Sagas: Guard Dog

Guard Dog.png Guard Dog Saga Guard Dog.png
The Players: The Games:
Coinciding Sagas: Idea Guy, TTS
Teen Troon Squad Saga.png Teen Troon Squad Saga Teen Troon Squad Saga.png
The Players: The Prizes:
Coinciding Sagas: Idea Guy, Guard Dog