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Jay Z

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What Chris thought his lawyer looked like...
I've got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one.


—Jay Z, explaining the situation.

James Zylberstien, aka Jay Z, was Chris's lawyer friend from Nintendo. Quit due to stress from project Sonichu Alpha and now works for Microsoft. His major achievement (or fail depending on which way you look at it) was to encourage Chris to change the names of his real-life characters so when the videogame was made they couldn't sue.

While there is certainly some humor in Chris' feeble attempts to rename the characters despite having the creative capabilities of an old sock, many trolls feel that one of the greatest sources of humor was seeing Chris's pathetic attempts to slander real people who he thinks had "wronged" him in the past. While Chris has largely kept changes made to characters' names due to Jay Z's influence, later enemies were still often referred to by their real names. This is most evident in Sonichu 10, where Jack Thaddeus, Evan George, Alec Benson Leary, Sean Wately, and Mao are all referred to by name. As well Jason Kendrick Howell is identified by name, but his sequence was part of an earlier preview where he was already called by name. In all likelihood, even though Chris remembers to call Mary Lee Walsh "Slaweel Ryam" he doesn't remember Jay Z's legal warnings, and is more interested in slandering his opponents than anything else.

---- Christian Weston Chandler's People ----

At home: Bob Chandler | Barbara Chandler | Patti Chandler | The Chandler Cats | Clover and Snoopy

Family: Minor Family Members | Cole Smithey | Aunt Corrina | Daniel Weston | Anne Boleyn | Reginald Chandler | Crystal Weston Chandler

Enemies: Michael Snyder | Adam Stackhouse | Wes Iseli | Mary Lee Walsh | CADD Chef | Bagget | ScotPalazzo | Manajerks | B-Manajerk | Jerkhief | W-M-Manajerk | Kirby McDerbie | "Lady" Manajerk | Yellow-Shirted Foe | Omar Woodley |'s executives | Pmurt

Jerks: Joseph Herring | Lucas | Joshua Martinez

Sweethearts: Blanca Weiss | PandaHalo | BlueSpike | Sarah Jackson | Emily | Ivy | Kacey | Jackie | Catherine

Gal-Pals: Laura Dorazio | Tiffany Gowen | Kellie Andes | Megan Schroeder | Anna McLerran | Sarah Nicole Hammer | The Wallflower | Kim Wilson

The Asperpedia Four: Alec Benson Leary | Evan | Sean August Watley | Mao

Trolls: Liquid Chris | Clyde Cash | Jack Thaddeus | Jason Kendrick Howell | Kathleen | Man in the Pickle Suit | BILLY MAYS | Vivian Gee | Sarah May | Robert Simmons V | Jimmy Hill | Shigeru Miyamoto | Reggie Fils-Aimé | Takashi Tezuka | Jay Z | Surfshack Tito | Jeff/Francine | Arthur Spatchcock | Johan

Other: Abusive babysitter | Hanna | Ryan Cash | Vanessa Hudgens | Bruce Johnson | Virginia Jeanine Sanford | Rocky Shoemaker | Rob Bell | William Elliott Waterman | Mia Hamm | Lori Lopez | Caitlin | Chloe | Officer Nasty | Kimmi | Kenneth Erwin Englehardt | DStecks