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Johan

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You say yo- you say, from your video, you're like an acrobat, but I can do so much better sexually so, we each upload a video... And the person- and, the person that gets more votes from the community on the internet wins!
 

 

—Chris's impression of Johan in a poor English accent

Johan
Johnathan.png
Information
Name Johan
Gender Male
Nationality Possibly English
Race White
Occupation Ex-gay porn star
Sperm donor

First referenced by Chris-chan in CWC Responds to a bully named Johan, a former gay porn star who was forced to quit the industry after failing an STD test (which Chris insinuates is AIDS) he was a rival to Chris-chan in his quest to impregnate a lesbian couple.

Johan first met Chris-Chan in a chatroom Chris had joined in order to discuss plans with Sam and Ellen, the Lesbian couple who were considering Chris to father their children. After recognizing Chris-Chan as being the original true and honest creator of Sonichu and Rosechu, he informed this Lesbian couple of some of Chris's mishaps,[1] such as Megan Schroeder and the Cakefarts incident. After reacting as any sensible person would to this info, the Lesbian couple started to reconsider if Chris was a good enough choice as to be the father of their children. Johan quickly took this opportunity to nominate himself as the surrogate father for their new children.

Though it isn't clear who challenged who, by the end of the conversation Chris and Johan had agreed to have a sex-off wherein each would make videos proving their sexual prowess with the person with the most votes getting to impregnate the Lesbian Couple. Chris would go on to call Johan a bully with an STD and therefore, regardless of the videos' content, people should vote for him anyway.Johan has remained completely silent, however.

While Chris's video managed to shock and horrify the internet, Johan's video of him making love to an unnamed Asian slut only proved his sexual performance skills, better body and larger non-bent duck. This showed in the polls, putting Johan at an 16 point lead after almost 7,000 votes.[2]

Because of his ignominious defeat, Chris pulled the video soon after. Johan has yet to be heard of since, it can be assumed Sam and Ellen chose him to be the father of their child over Chris due to the results of the polls.

See also

External links

References

  1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBS17BueShQ
  2. http://www.strawpoll.me/10357607
Christian Weston Chandler's people

Chris himself: Chloe | Bill Riley | Junior Jenkins | Carlos Chantor | Stephanie Bustcakes | Night Star | TwiSparLicious


Family:

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Others: Cole Smithey | Aunt Corrina | Minor Family Members | Daniel Weston | Anne Boleyn

Future: Lovely Weather | Crystal Weston Chandler | Reginald Chandler


Friends:

Sweethearts: Blanca Weiss | PandaHalo | Julie | Ivy | Kacey | Jackie | Catherine

Minor sweethearts: Lori Lopez | Hanna | Sarah Jackson | Emily | Vanessa Hudgens | Faeryn | Jessica Quinn

Sweethearts-to-be: Megan Schroeder | The Wallflower | DoopieDoOver

Gal-pals: Sarah Nicole Hammer | Laura Dorazio | Kellie Andes | Tiffany Gowen | Anna McLerran | Kim Wilson | Clare Porter

White knights: Robert Simmons V | Kenneth Erwin Englehardt | William Elliott Waterman

Others: Female fanbase | MLP voice actresses | Pokémon club friends | Rocky Shoemaker | Sam and Ellen | Virginia Jeanine Sanford


Trolls:

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The Asperpedia Four: Alec Benson Leary | Evan Christopher George | Mao Ling | Sean August Watley

Famous people: BILLY MAYS | Jay Z | Jimmy Hill | Reggie Fils-Aimé | Shigeru Miyamoto | Takashi Tezuka

Others: Arthur Spatchcock | Jeff/Francine | Johan | LadyOfTheCosmo | Thorg


Other enemies:

PVCC: Kene Meniru | Mary Lee Walsh

Jerkops: Bagget | Jerkhief

Manajerks: B-Manajerk | Kirby | "Lady" Manajerk | Michael Snyder | ScotPalazzo | Turdijerk | W-M-Manajerk | Yellow-Shirted Foe

The GAMe PLACe: Daniel Mimms | Lucas

Jerks: Joseph Herring | Wes Iseli

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Miscellaneous:

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Inanimate objects: Kimmi | Naru | Officer Nasty