Christian Weston Chandler

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This article is about the TRUE and ORIGINAL Chris – it is his article and nothing less! For his self-insert "Sonichu" character, see Christian Weston Chandler (comic character). For other uses, see Christian Weston Chandler (disambiguation).
"Christian" redirects here. For our hero's view on Christianity, see Chris and religion.
Rsz transtemplate.jpg Gender disclosure: This person currently identifies as MTF transgender. Pronoun usage on this page may or may not reflect biological sex and/or gender identity.
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Note on Credibility:

Christian Weston Chandler has been deemed to be an unreliable narrator for the following reasons:
Chris is a habitual liar.
Chris will often exaggerate things that happened, often to make himself look better.
Chris is considerably naïve.
Chris's accounts on how a certain event went down will often vary with each time he recalls it.
Bear this in mind, and use healthy skepticism when taking statements from the subject being discussed.

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Note on Sockpuppets:

Christian Weston Chandler has been known to use sockpuppet accounts. Since it is difficult to discern their sock accounts, it is best to avoid speculating an account belongs to Christian Weston Chandler unless fully verified.

HonestContent.jpg
This article is rated M for Honest Content

It may contain content deemed not safe for work. Reader discretion is advised.


Christian Weston Chandler
Information
Name Christopher Weston Chandler (1982–1992)
Christian Weston Chandler (1992–2016)
Christine Weston Chandler (2016–present)
Also known as Chris-Chan
Chris Chan
CWC
Little C
Ricardo
RWC
Father
Pop
Papa
Ian Brandon Anderson
Solid Chris
Junior Jenkins
Little Cuz
Carlos Chantor
KookyDashy[1]
Kaka Apple Chrissy
Tini
paintingatree
Stephanie Bustcakes
Night Star
CPU Blue Heart
CWC Psychlight
LegendaryChristorian
OPL (Our Pet Lolcow)
Natalie Portman
Grandma Christine
Mother
Mama
Princess Fehuni Hitikara
Sonichu
Jesus Christ
Camera #000
Christine Chan Sonichu
Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu
Jesus Christ Chan
Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu
The Teflon Tard
Christ Chan Prime
The Second Coming
Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime
Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu Prime
Gender Male (1982–2016)
Transwoman (2016–present)
Religion Nondenominational Christianity[note 1] (1982-2017)
Neptunian Cult (2017-2021)
Neo Spiritual Christianity (2021-present)
Titles Sonichu Creator
Chronicler of Sonichu & Rosechu
CPU Goddess of the Nations of Cwcville, Comma, and the Commodore Consoles[2]
The Queen of Modern Laughter[3]
The Real Player One
Race White (1/8th "Cherokian")
Height 5'10" (1.778 m)[4]
Weight 215 lb (97.5 kg) [5]
Education Piedmont Virginia Community College (AAS, CADD)
Nationality American
Occupation Freelance comic book artist (self-published)
YouTube streamer
Video game designer (unpublished)
Wendy's employee (2001)
Cutco salesman (2003)
Musician (2003-2009)
Male escort (2010, unpaid)
Entrepreneur, Cwcville Shopping (20142016)
Prostitute (2016, unpaid)
Member of Praetor, artist (2020-present)
Spouse Cryzel Rosechu, Magi-Chan Sonichu (m. March 2018)
Sylvana Rosechu, Mewtwo (m. June 2018)
and Pickchu (m. May 2022)[6]
Mother Barbara Chandler (1941–present)
Father Robert Franklin Chandler Jr. (1927–2011)
Siblings Cole Smithey (half-brother)
David Alan Chandler (half-brother)
Carol Chandler (half-sister)
I am the high-functioning autistic person who was heavily emotionally damaged, artistic inspiration lost with paranoia, deception, blackmail and plain hurtful words from those bottom-feeding Trolls. I am the hand-drawing original creator of Sonichu, Rosechu and the city of Cwcville, Virginia, USA.
KookyDashy, AKA Chris.[7]
Behold, the Mistake of God!
Encyclopedia Dramatica on Chris.

Christine Weston Chandler, previously known as Christian Weston Chandler (born: Christopher Weston Chandler; 24 February 1982) is a 42-year-old autistic, mentally ill,[8] misandristic and misogynistic cartoonist, YouTuber, criminal, former virgin with rage, current self-proclaimed deity, and literal motherfucker. He is commonly referred to by his nickname Chris-Chan or Chris Chan, by his initials CWC, or simply the gender-neutral Chris. He looks kind of like a cartoon version of Benjamin Franklin come to life, and is considered to be one of the most well-known and well-documented lolcows in Internet culture – if not one of the most well-documented people in history.

Some would consider Chris to be a celebrity, but he hasn't sold a multi-platinum album, nor has he been awarded with an Oscar. Instead, he is the creator of the infamous webcomic Sonichu, which ostensibly tells the story of an Electric Hedgehog Pokémon Sonichu and his sweetheart Rosechu and their adventures with the Chaotic Combo. In practice, the webcomic really serves as wish fulfillment for Chris himself, allowing him to express his dissatisfaction with how the faculty at school and college didn't acknowledge what he saw as an exemplary academic performance when he graduated, along with his frustration over being unable to find a romantic partner; as such, the book let him redirect his anger toward the people who impeded his journey, casting them as villains and himself as a true Campbellian hero in his narrative. After completing his education, Chris was unemployed for most of his adult life, making a living off of welfare and donations from his webcomic's True and Loyal Fanbase.

In late 2007, he became Internet-famous when images of him at a tabletop gaming store leaked out to the Something Awful message boards. Upon discovery, Chris was mocked for his odd fashion sense and oafish appearance, and images of Chris at the store soon spread to places like 4chan and Encyclopedia Dramatica, and in the process, many trolls were exposed to his webcomic for the first time, propelling Chris to stardom. Initial fascination was spurred on by his childlike artwork, his signature homemade Sonichu medallion that he wore in public, and his history of loitering in public places while literally holding up a sign asking women to talk to him. His reaction to the ensuing mockery led to a cycle of Chris revealing more disturbing facts about himself and trolls going to greater and greater lengths to uncover more knowledge about this strange individual. Thus, Chris's life began to spiral out of control with the advent of organized trolling, armchair psychological analysis from bewildered onlookers, and some truly bizarre antics from Chris that continue to this day, which would influence the development of the webcomic whenever he got around to updating it.

Chris's most notable period of activity on the Internet occurred between 2007 and 2010 – a period now dubbed the "Classic Era" by modern Christorians – in which he was repeatedly catfished by trolls pretending to be romantic interests, and he lashed out against arch-enemy Clyde Cash, the leader of the most notable group of trolls in his life: The Miscreants. In this time, he was duped by a sadistic 13-year-old into stuffing his medallion up his ass, he had his identity stolen by a far more talented individual, and he saw Sonichu mercilessly spoofed by a webcomic team that designed a story to piss him off, among other misadventures. However, he eventually decided to sign off from the Internet at the end of this period, seemingly wising up to his dang dirty trolls. When he inevitably returned to the limelight a few months later in 2011, he was not the same. Chris began to experiment with crossdressing, calling himself a "Tomgirl", before eventually coming out as transgender in late 2014.

From here, Chris's Internet life stayed relatively normal (by his standards), despite his shift in gender identity, his father's death (which led to the retirement of the Miscreants), a hit-and-run case, the accident that caused his house to burn down, and an incident where he maced an employee at a GameStop store over the color of Sonic's arms. Things changed when two new sets of trolls – known as the Idea Guys and the Teen Troon Squadbrainwashed him with increasingly-insane beliefs (such as the idea that he and both of his parents are half-Sonichu or half-Rosechu), culminating in Chris's revelation that he was a goddess meant to bring about a convergence of dimensions between the world shown in his webcomic and our world, effectively starting a doomsday cult around what began as a silly, self-indulgent Sonic the Hedgehog and Pokémon crossover. Afterward, Chris used this delusion as an elaborate coping mechanism while he continued his self-destructive habits.

Despite the trolls in question being driven out by the effort of the Guard Dogs trying to keep Chris from going further down a path of ruination (and to keep him from embarrassing himself any more), he chose to keep clinging to these unhealthy and downright absurd beliefs. All the while, his physical and mental health withered away, and money became a serious issue for the Chandler household, while his mother wasn't long for the world, all of which led Chris to retreat even further into his fantasies. It got to the point where he pretended to be possessed by various fictional characters on a regular basis, with one nearly year-long period of "possession" by Sonichu serving as a way for Chris to cope with the fact that he wasn't able to attend two My Little Pony conventions cancelled during the COVID-19 pandemic.

The point of no return was finally crossed in 2021, after leaked audio revealed that he had several incestuous encounters with his mother, which forcibly evicted him from his own home and sent him to Central Virginia Regional Jail, which became his most publicized incident in years. During that time, letters from jail illustrate that he went even deeper into his own fantasies by believing himself to be Jesus Christ reincarnated. Chris was later transferred to the Western State Hospital mental institution for three months before returning to jail, until he was released in March 2023. After spending a few months in the group home in Chesterfield County, he was bought a house in Big Island, where he lives to this day. Chris remains active on Twitter and Youtube, and (un)fortunately, he shows no signs of stopping.

There has never been an Internet personality quite like Chris-Chan, thanks to the unique circumstances shaping his peculiar behavior and subsequently leading to his prominence online, and there may never be another quite like him – he is truly one of a kind. It is the dedicated mission of this very wiki to chronicle his life in ridiculous detail, and if you want to go down the seemingly bottomless rabbit hole with us, then you should probably start by reading this page. Buckle up, because this is going to be a long ride, and the end is nowhere in sight.

Overview

Protip.jpg
PROTIP:

The official CWCki policy is to use masculine pronouns to describe Chris, even after transitioning, for the sake of avoiding reader confusion. More details on this subject can be read here.
He seems intelligent enough to understand that he does not understand, and that is the hardest part of all.
An anonymous University of Virginia student making an observation about Chris.[9]
Chris in July 2018, posing with a fan cosplaying as Sonichu at BronyCon.

Chris is a cowardly, autistic, self-identified transwoman with delusional tendencies who has been allowed – by his parents, Barbara Chandler and the deceased Bob Chandler – to eternally live like a child, amassing toys and video games into a single room in his parents' house. Even into his forties, Chris remains so comfortable in his protected existence that he refuses to conform to societal norms, something that already doesn't come naturally to autistic folks. He has regularly demonstrated trouble displaying acceptable public behavior, recognizing when he needs to use the washroom, and using his time to contribute to society in any meaningful way. Although the public school system forced Chris to face reality, graduation has allowed him to stay indoors and avoid taking part in typical civilian activities, opting instead to stick to the comfort of living at home and subsisting off of taxpayer dollars. Due to this avoidance of the outside world, Chris hasn't held a steady job since 2001 (commissions and multi-level marketing aside, although it can be argued that his work for Praetor can be considered one), and he hasn't been employed for more than a few months in his whole life. It is likely Chris will never get a job again thanks to Patreon, the tugboat, the begging generous donations, and the fact he has flat out said his autism prevents him from getting a job (in spite of there being many social services available to help people with disabilities find work). Chris has had shockingly few meaningful relationships with people in a social setting outside of his parents, although he does manage to make friends with people who share his interests in nerd and LGBT culture.[10]

Chris is completely obsessed with his OC and the associated comic, to the point that he has hand-crafted several medallions in Sonichu's shape. Between February 2004 and March 2010, Chris was rarely seen or photographed without one of these totems, even wearing them in his driver's license photo and to his college graduation; the medallion disappeared for a time, but returned in September 2010. At the same time, he was completely convinced that everyone wants to learn about Sonichu, and that the only reason Nintendo, Sega, and Sony haven't approached him about making Sonichu games is that they're either tough negotiators, or that his chances are being ruined by trolls working for them. For a while, Chris had operated an eBay shop where he would make and sell these medallions, including Sonichu, Rosechu, Blake, and even custom character options. These were sold for $30 apiece. After the eBay shop became a mild success, he moved to Etsy, but his laziness got the best of him and he lost the shop after nine months in business, due to failing to fulfill orders.

A useful tool for predicting Christory.
An approximate graph which correlates knowledge about Chris to sympathy towards him.

Chris used to absolutely hate gay men, and communicated this with such intensity that observers were easily convinced he was simply terrified of becoming gay himself. He cannot bear to look at another man's penis, and he stared at a Sailor Moon poster to keep himself straight.[11] Chris's words do not always align with his actions; throughout his early Internet history, he appeared to be deeply insecure about his gender and sexuality. Even prior to his gender transition, he has swallowed his own semen, worn a bra, and only reined in his tendency to proudly crossdress because his elderly mother intensely disapproved. While these actions do not indicate homosexuality outright, they do question the validity of Chris's own judgments on his sexual orientation. Surprisingly, however, his homophobia seemed to have little basis in his religious beliefs, as he had not noticed Leviticus 18:22, which condemns homosexuality, until he saw it on a 2009 episode of Family Guy.[12] His homophobia did not extend to lesbians, whom he is aroused by. Over time, Chris dropped his homophobic tendencies, apologized in 2015 and supports what he calls the SLGBTQ spectrum. In 2018, the Idea Guys brainwashed Chris into identifying as bisexual, although it's likely that this just as much a matter of Chris coming to terms with his own sexuality as it was the result of manipulation.

His adult life has been largely defined by his goals of developing Sonichu into a hit media franchise to find financial success (or at least get his debts under control), his Love Quest to obtain a "boyfriend-free, 18-[his current age]-year old, caring, smoke-free, non-alcoholic white girl" to make into a "sweetheart from the ground-up," and, beginning from 2011, his gender identity as a tomgirl and later a lesbian transwoman. Later, Chris developed a Messiah complex, believing himself to be a reincarnation of Jesus Christ that is destined to facilitate a Dimensional Merge between fiction and reality.

In short, Chris's story is one that seems fated not to have a happy ending, with his life perhaps serving as a cautionary tale in the age of the Internet. A tale of bad parenting, social isolation, gullibility, narcissism, laziness, hypocrisy, sexual deviancy, and most importantly, a tale of the world witnessing in real-time the slow, painful degradation of another human being.

Aliases

Call me by the real name that God and the bear has given me throughout my whole life. The current full name of Christian Weston Chandler, my first name being Christopher and my Spanish nickname being Ricardo. But in the end, just call me the full name, Christian Weston Chandler.
Chris making demands of his impostor, years before legally changing his name to "Christine."
Chris's self-portrait, complete with The Classic and the Sonichu Medallion, circa 2007. "Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!"

Christian Weston Chandler has a wide array of names he has given himself. He was born Christopher Weston Chandler, but changed to "Christian" at the behest of the "mall conductor bear" that misheard his name, which he interpreted as a sign from God. During the mid-2000s, Chris adopted the nickname "Chris-Chan," a play on his surname and the Japanese honorific suffix -chan, which according to Wikipedia "is used for young children, close friends, babies, grandparents and sometimes female adolescents." Chris was exposed to this honorific through anime shows like Crayon Shin-chan and Super Milk Chan. The name "Chris-Chan" is often mistakenly spelled without a hyphen as "Chris Chan," as if Chris had named himself after Jackie Chan. Unusually, before his gender transition Chris would often refer to himself by his full name, or if he was feeling especially formal as "Christopher Christian Weston Chandler." He is unusually proud of his initials "CWC," and often incorporates them into his creations and various puns on the word "quick." Examples include CWCville, A CWC Audition and CWC Dare.

Shortly after declaring himself a transgender lesbian, Chris started introducing himself as "Christine." In May 2016, he successfully filed for another name change to "Christine Weston Chandler."[13] He then followed up by filing to alter the description for sex on his driver's license to female.[14] He now signs his name with "heart i's." Legal documents refer to him as Christine Chandler,[15] except for civil cases, in which he hadn't updated his name change information with plaintiffs.[16] This wiki, however, refers to him as Chris for consistency.

Chris first identified by the name Christine in late 2014 before getting a legal name-change in 2016.

Chris's nickname in his high school Spanish classes was "Ricardo," and long after then he would still translate his own name to "Ricardo Weston Chandler" when writing or speaking in Spanish, likely due to his ignorance of the fact that you generally don't replace your own name with something completely different when speaking in another language. At times he would go so far as to announce himself as "Christopher Christian 'Ricardo' Weston Chandler," or variants thereof, to identify himself precisely. In recent times, Chris has forgone stating his middle name, former names, and Spanish nickname in videos (Chris has never come up with a feminine counterpart to his "Ricardo" nickname, or any other Spanish-sounding replacement.).

Occasionally, Chris would use the names of his characters to refer to himself, most notably his evil twin, Reldnahc Notsew Naitsirhc, and of course, Sonichu. In his comics, Chris has the ability to transform into an Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, named Chris-Chan Sonichu. As Chris grew even more unhinged in 2017 and fell under the Idea Guys' sway in 2018, he would conflate himself even further with his fantastic inventions to the point where he unofficially added "Sonichu" to the end of his name (although this is not recognized as a legal name change, unlike "Christian" or "Christine" in previous years), to account for his later belief that he is actually half-Sonichu in real life following several rounds of brainwashing. As of the Jail Saga, he calls himself "Jesus Christ-ine Weston Chandler Sonichu Prime", to account for him being the reincarnation of Jesus Christ, sometimes even saying Jesus as "Hayy-zeus", probably as a botched attempt to sound Spanish, and sometimes shortening the name to "Christ-ine". And yes, he actually introduces himself as Jesus Christ in public. Other modern names for himself include CPU Blue Heart and Night Star, his self-inserts for the Hyperdimension Neptunia and My Little Pony franchises respectively. In contexts when he wants to be especially grandiose, he might append his various fictional alter egos to his name, much as he would list his former names in the past.

Only a few of the names commonly used to refer to Chris were not invented by Chris himself. One of the most notable ones is "Chrissy," popularized by Arjen Van Dierten oddly enough, trying to mockingly feminize Chris's name seemed to predict his eventual interest in crossdressing and later interest in becoming transgender. Ian Brandon Anderson, which was derived from Chris's IBAChandler YouTube account, was popularized by Liquid Chris, much to Chris's angst. Less notably, there is also "Solid Chris," used by some to differentiate him from Liquid in the tradition of a certain video game series. Certain A-Loggers have been known to refer to Chris as "Satan's Agent on Earth." Users of Kiwi Farms have coined the term "Classic Chris" to refer to Chris before Bob's death and/or before the Tomgirl Saga, with "Modern Chris" being used to describe his more recent antics.

Foundational Era

Childhood and Adolescence

The most important parting words I can leave you with – well, are to always remember this. You show people where your weak points are located, then they will know how to push your button. If you never show them, they will never know.
Virginia Jeanine Sanford giving Chris valuable advice that he, unfortunately, did not follow.
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The evolution (or decay, depending upon how you see things) of Chris-chan... in a pog form (yes, those are homemade pogs). Top: Chris '94, '95, '96. Bottom: '97, '98', '99.

Christopher Weston Chandler was born on 24 February 1982 at Martha Jefferson Hospital in Charlottesville, Virginia.[17] His parents, Robert and Barbara, worked as an engineer at Western Electric (later General Electric) and an office worker at Virginia Power, respectively. Although little is known about Chris's toddler years, the Autism papers revealed that his linguistic abilities were subpar, which became his first sign of autism. Despite this, Chris claims his first word, "monkey," was spoken at just 6 weeks old,[18] and he remains proud of this feat into adulthood, regardless of how obviously unlikely and physically impossible it is to be true – the language centers in the human brain literally cannot grasp English at 6 weeks, disregarding infantile vocal chords.

An abusive babysitter, who was alone with Christopher every day for years,[19] allegedly locked him in a toy room at an early age after turning all the lights off, an event he described as being immensely traumatic for him.[18] (Chris apparently missed the irony of the fact that he regularly locked himself in a room, surrounded by toys, for much of his adult life.) He once identified this confinement as the source of his autism (which is wishful thinking on Chris's part, considering that autism is a genetic condition that isn't triggered by external trauma). Between the ages of 1 and 7, Chris did not speak at all, and had to visit James Madison University for speech therapy, where he met his first male friend Joshua Martinez. He was diagnosed with high-functioning autism, with the doctor projecting (at least according to Chris) that he would never make it to high school, much less be able to write his own name.[20] However, Chris was able to meet these cognitive milestones in time.

During the 1980s, Christopher was playmates with Sarah Nicole Hammer, one of his first friends. In one of the anecdotes that he's written about her (which are few and far between), Chris indicated that Sarah once convinced him that Casper the Friendly Ghost lived in the crawlspace under her house. When he crawled in there to look, she locked him in[21] in a stunning display of their friendship, beginning Chris's lifelong career of getting trolled. Apparently, he doesn't hold any hard feelings over it (possibly just because she's a pretty girl – if a guy or an ugly girl did that to him, Chris would swear vengeance).

Chris spent the 1990-1991 school year in the fourth grade at Nathanael Greene Elementary School, until his parents pulled him out of classes over a mysterious dispute. Chris claims that he was forcefully restrained by the school's faculty, who recorded his screams,[22] and that he was made to sit on the lap of the principal, an experience that supposedly inspired his homophobia. Chris later proclaimed that the abuse from the staff was the most traumatic experience of his life. It's possible that Chris's opinions about these events are colored more by his parents' attitudes than his own memories. The issue went to court, with Greene County seeking to have Chris sent to a "special school," which Bob and Barbara likely interpreted to mean a nut-house. Chris was homeschooled through the 5th grade during these proceedings. While being homeschooled, the animatronic bear Leonard Bearstein misheard Christopher's first name and called him "Christian," which inexplicably convinced Christopher to later have his name legally changed. When his family exhausted all legal recourse, Chris and his father relocated to Richmond so that Chris could continue his education in a different school system, starting with the sixth grade at Providence Middle School.[18] He described his time there as pleasant, although he was often bullied by his classmates. His teacher, Virginia Jeanine Sanford, helped him to develop social skills and cope with bullying, and Chris later called her the most influential person in his life.

At age 11, Chris entered and won the Sonic the Hedgehog Watch & Win Sweepstakes. On his 12th birthday, he enjoyed a $1,000 shopping spree as his prize. WVIR-TV's coverage of the event focused on Chris's autism, regarding the contest win as a worthy accomplishment due to his mental condition. Chris put footage from this newscast on YouTube long before he was known to the general public, and it remains the most solid evidence that he is not an elaborate troll. This incident is often cited as the beginning of Chris's tendency to use his autism as leverage for special treatment, as well as his fascination with toys and video games at the expense of more mature pursuits. It has also led Chris to constantly enter contests in hopes of winning big (or else becoming infuriated and belligerent to the winners when he loses).


More of young Christian


Christian Weston Chandler, the basketball team's water boy. Don't drink anything from one of Chris's cups.
Hard to believe, but this photo has not been airbrushed to perfection.

Chris spent much of his time in high school playing video games at home, reading Goosebumps novels, and hanging out with his "gal pals" and "friend" at school (though as it turned out, many of these gal-pals were arranged friendships). It was at this time that he first put his "creative talents" to use, with the inventions of Bionic the Hedgehog and Sonichu, the latter of which was created for a class project simply because he couldn't use copyrighted characters.[23] (The irony that Chris's own solution to that problem was to merge two copyrighted characters into a new character is somehow still lost on him, even to this day.) After inventing his magnum opus with the character of Sonichu, Chris began to incorporate his original character into everything that he could, although his passion for his character wouldn't truly surface until college.

Chris claims to have been on the honor roll, and during this time acquired the true source of his powers, his Amnyfest Ring. Because the art award he wanted was given to someone else, Chris became despondent and stormed out crying during his high school graduation. He honestly thought he deserved the award more than anyone else because he worked on it "so hard" despite his autism, ignoring the likelihood that the artistic achievements of his peers were simply better. Another reason for his sorrow was his fear that he might soon have to grow up and start acting like an adult, a phase of his life that his parents had not properly prepared him for.[24] Evidently, this fear was unfounded.

Since leaving high school and the happiest years of his life, Chris has been unwilling and unable to progress in any other aspect of his life, and has unfortunately even regressed in several key areas as he has gotten older. He remains trapped in a childish, Year 2000 time-stasis, as he believes that whatever he was doing at the time was what helped him attract female companions. That his high school gal-pals have moved on and married real adult men with careers is of little consequence to him. Chris still pines for "better days" in spite of his current belief system hypothetically leaving him in a better place than he ever was in high school. As you might imagine, this is precisely because things didn't get much better for Chris after finishing school.


Chris's award-winning artwork


Adult Chronicles

You should stay in school, learn as you much. And try before you praise and despise. Never smoke! Never drink! Never worry about how others think of you when you do things... Don't be afraid to approach those of your opposite gender. And MOST IMPORTANTLY! PLEASE... STAY STRAIGHT. I leave you with those words, as I have shared with you on this, my twenty-fifth birthday, February 24th, 2007. I am "Christopher" Christian Weston Chandler. Live long, and shine on, in your very own unique way. War is never the answer; peace is. Never fight. Compliments will get you fuzzy-wuzzies. War gets you prickly-wicklies... Thank you very much, and have a wonderful day.
Excerpts from Christian Weston Chandler's FUTURE MESSAGE, recorded shortly before his discovery by the Internet.
One of Chris's promotional images for his Love Quest.

Chris's entry into Piedmont Virginia Community College probably eased his inability to cope with life after high school. He took courses in Computer Aided Drafting and Design and began spending more time on Sonichu, launching a newsletter and circulating it on the PVCC campus. Over time, he began losing touch with his gal-pals from high school, and he presumably found the junior college crowd less willing to humor him and his personal idiosyncrasies. By his own admission, his social life at PVCC was lacking when compared to his high school years.[25][26] Chris says he decided he needed a sweetheart in February 2003. Possibly driven by his discovery that his old friend Sarah Hammer had begun dating Wes Iseli, Chris started his Love Quest in earnest that summer. However, he quickly found that every girl he talked to had a boyfriend (or so they claimed). Chris soon became neurotic about the "Infinitely-High Boyfriend-Factor" and began concocting and employing various bizarre methods to attract women without actually having to approach or speak to them.

Chris's most celebrated technique involved sitting in one place (or pacing back and forth) for hours, holding a sign that read "I am a (variable age)-Year Old, Single Male, seeking an 18-(Chris's age then)-Year Old, Single Female Companion." Amazingly, this strategy accomplished nothing beyond getting him into trouble with various authority figures who believed that he was loitering and/or soliciting sex, which was legally true. Chris was particularly affected by a series of confrontations with the PVCC dean Mary Lee Walsh over his attraction techniques, resulting in an ongoing, completely one-sided blood feud involving magic curses and slander. After a series of confrontations featuring increasingly bizarre and threatening behavior on Chris's part, Walsh expelled him for one year in 2004. He eventually returned, however, obtaining an associate's degree in May 2006.

He can smell fear.

After college and completing his education, Chris promptly dropped out of society, devoting his life to finding a boyfriend-free girl, drawing Sonichu, mass debating, and using his welfare money to buy video games and sex toys. He would not make any serious attempts to seek out a career from graduation onward, in spite of attaining a degree that could probably net him a decent-paying (and relatively undemanding) career that would likely grant him more opportunities than sitting at home playing video games ever could.

In 2005, Chris met Megan Schroeder at a local game and card shop. A social outcast like himself, Megan proved unusual in that she was willing to talk to Chris for more than 5 minutes. The two quickly became close friends, although Megan claimed to have recently endured a bad break-up and refused to entertain Chris's obvious romantic interest. Chris, seemingly basing his stance on studying women in porn and anime, believed that the key to turning Megan's platonic feelings romantic was to make inappropriate advances toward her until she had to tell him to stop touching her (a habit that got so bad that Megan later equated it to sexual harassment).

In the summer of 2007, Chris put it all on the line by entering a PaRappa the Rapper contest so that he could win prizes and a trip for two to Seattle, which formed the centerpiece of his plan to finally score with Megan. The contest ended in disaster for Chris, as he lost to the dreaded Adam Stackhouse and subsequently learned that Megan wouldn't have gone with him on the trip even if he had won.

It was during the Love Quest that Chris was inspired to launch Sonichu, a comic book series featuring his Electric Hedgehog Pokémon. Ostensibly, the comic was intended to focus on the life and times of Chris's unbelievably original character, but by halfway through the first issue, the focus of the story had become Chris and his myriad of romantic misadventures. Little would Chris know, however, that his life was about to permanently change as a result of writing and drawing his magnum opus.

Classic Era

Main articles: 2007, 2008, 2009, and 2010
You've wasted your life. You've wasted your life and you think you're good enough to date anyone, including me? I mean, you're frickin' weak-willed, you're not even good enough for society. You- I don't think you're ever gonna get anything, you can't fight for what you want... I'm gonna be happy and I'm gonna live my life and you know what, you're gonna be doing the same thing in five years. If you're not dead.
Kacey, accurately predicting how stagnant Chris's life would be after breaking up with him.
Chris in 2008. He was duped into wearing his mom's underwear by Blanca Weiss.
FUCK YEAH!!!

Chris's rare talent (and by talent we mean pathology) was discovered when someone posted an anonymous picture of Sonichu on 4chan. It only took a quick Google search of Chris's name to discover the picture's author. He was also discovered on 26 October 2007 by the website SomethingAwful, when a user derailed an unrelated conversation and wrote their personal account of Chris. A thread on Chris and Sonichu was created the next day.[27] Chris's miserable existence spilled over onto Encyclopedia Dramatica in November 2007. His life hasn't been the same since then, and shockingly enough, Chris himself shoulders some of the blame for why that is.

Upon learning of the "Chris-Chan" article on ED, Chris released a single YouTube video attempting to diplomatically convince the site to remove the page. Failing in this, he then spent the next several months vandalizing the article in the vain hope of overwhelming his enemies. This catastrophically backfired as Chris, in an attempt to prove himself as lurid as the trolls, revealed a great deal of embarrassing information, most notably a portrait of himself finger-banging Megan that ruined his most important relationship at the time, giving the trolls justification to continue their war against Chris in the process. By the spring of 2008, Chris would be banned from both his favorite hangout (temporarily, but he was banned permanently in August 2008) and his parents' church for reasons at least partially related to information brought to light by the ED article.

Hello, ladies! Chris in 2010.
Chris in 2009, making fetish videos for Ivy.

In August 2008, Chris declared war upon Encyclopedia Dramatica in a series of videos, threatening to withhold publication of the upcoming Sonichu #7 unless his vast True and Loyal Fanbase rallied to force ED to remove the "Chris-Chan" article. When ED suffered outages unrelated to this crusade, Chris took credit and declared victory, ironically guaranteeing that he would be under constant fire from trolls for years to come. This began an endless cycle in which Chris would produce videos, comics, and harebrained schemes to attack the trolls, which would, in turn, encourage more and more trolls to provoke him for his hilarious responses where he would reveal more information about himself.

The cycle was briefly disrupted in the fall of 2008 when Chris sent his various medallions to his fake Internet girlfriend, who immediately destroyed them and broke up with him. This emotional heartbreak and the release of LittleBigPlanet reduced Chris's output of videos and other sources of lulz. At the same time, Encyclopedia Dramatica began cracking down on trolls using Chris's ED page as a forum for discussing him, and in general, opinion was divided as to whether it was funny or obnoxious and tiring to continue harassing him. The resulting schism led to the creation of numerous websites (such as this one singularly devoted to documenting his life), which has only expanded the coverage of Chris's hijinks.

By late 2008, trolls controlled many aspects of Chris's life by posing as dedicated fans, sweethearts, cartoonish enemies, and prospective business partners. Chris's ego and naïvete readily embraced this brave new world in which every woman wanted to fuck him, every man was either trying to help him sell Sonichu products or steal the franchise for their own nefarious goals, and that any and all trolls were a vocal minority on his way to fame and fortune. Trolls would begin denoting major events in Chris's life as "sagas" such as the Miyamoto Saga, the Julie Saga, the Ivy Saga, the Liquid Saga, and the Asperchu Saga. All the while, the editors and administrators working at Encyclopedia Dramatica and the CWCki maintained a constant record of these events, ensuring that Chris could not get away with his highly selective and revisionary treatment of his history.

Following his disastrous failure to woo a real girl in March 2010, Chris began to realize what anyone else would have figured out a long time ago: that his Internet presence and the toxic cycle of exposing something about himself, getting exploited or otherwise made fun of by trolls, and reacting poorly to said trolling was having a detrimental effect upon his mental health and social life, with every new video that he created exacerbating the problem. This realization appears to have led him to reduce his online presence and to stop donning Sonichu medallions and clown shirts. For a time, it looked like Chris was learning from his experiences and was making an effort to improve his own lot in life.

In November 2010, around the same time another romantic saga involving another sweetheart ended in failure, Chris announced he will no longer socialize online or publish videos of himself. Subsequently, all videos save for the last one were removed from his YouTube channel. It initially appeared that Chris was making a positive lifestyle change, but alas, it was quickly discovered that his Internet activity had not completely ceased since he announced retirement from social media. Instead of investing his time into more productive activities or improving on his social skills, Chris spent much more time playing video games and otherwise doing what he had been doing when he did engage with trolls. In a predictable fashion, he ultimately forgot anything that he might have learned from his experiences of being one of the Internet's biggest punching bags, and he subsequently returned to making new videos starting on August 2011... Albeit with a pretty big change in how he presented himself online.

Crossdresser Era

Main articles: 2011, 2012, 2013, and 2014
I Seriously Have Been PUBLICALY INVISIBLE for YEARS! The DAMN Trolling-Stupids have manipulated me; smeared my once good name through the worst mud, muck, and bodily fluids; mentally and emotionally raped me continuously; made the worst imaginable reputation of me on the Internet, AND relayed THAT into OFFLINE LIFE in gossip, rumors, and presidentially grand Fucked-Up Campaigns!!!
Chris vents on Facebook after years of trolling take their toll.
Chris in 2011 in one of the first Tomgirl Pictures. This photo was also taken near the time of his father's death.
Chris in 2012.

Perhaps the most dramatic change in Chris's life was his open and enthusiastic embrace of crossdressing and femininity in general. In 2011, Chris was revealed to have become a full-blown crossdresser (or "tomgirl," as he calls it) and fully embraced his new identity both at home and in public. Chris seemed to have reconciled this behavior with his extreme homophobia, transphobia, and purported heterosexuality without any difficulty. Though treated as yet another saga at first, this behavior seems to be deeply entrenched and became more extreme in late 2014 and the years that followed. As mentioned previously, Chris would slowly but surely walk back his anti-LGBT stances.

Chris in 2013.

In September 2011, Chris's father died of heart failure. Chris lived with his widowed mother until 2021 (not that he willingly moved out), who along with the tugboat, was his only source of income during this time. Since his mother is in her 80s, it can be reasonably assumed that she has little time left on this earth, especially when her poor health and apparent cognitive decline are considered.

After Bob's death, Chris generally ceased interacting with trolls, seemingly no longer able to effortlessly bounce back from despair like he used to. Instead, Chris lapsed into a deep depression, already existing following the loss of the sanctity of his personal retreat but no doubt exacerbated by the later loss of his home to fire, and subsequent financial difficulties. In the aftermath of the family tragedy, many trolls began to question whether Chris deserved or indeed, could cope with any further trolling, given that he was no longer the bellicose, striped-shirted egocentric man-child that the world had come to know and love. For many, it became apparent that Chris's glory days of screaming into a camera like a madman and performing like a circus animal for trolls offering china were over, and several moved on. The Golden Age of Chris-Chan was over.

Chris in 2014, his long, lank, thin hair receding in earnest.
Chris in 2015, cosplaying as Vinyl Scratch, AKA DJ-PON3, after coming out as a transgender woman.

Nonetheless, the surviving Chandlers still managed to be drama magnets in their own neighborhood. In October 2011, Chris and Barb were arrested at The GAMe PLACe and charged on several counts including trespassing, assault, and failure to stop at an accident causing over $1,000 in damage after an altercation with Michael Snyder. (Chris had presumed that the store's new management meant that Snyder may no longer work there, thus giving Chris a chance to potentially revisit his old haunt. When this proved to not be the case, the both Chandlers hit Snyder with a car.) The trespassing and assault charges against Chris were dropped, but both still faced felony trials for the failure to stop, and Barb for assaulting a police officer. Much of the money that Bob left behind was used to pay for legal expenses.

While awaiting trial, Chris was worried that he may die a virgin if he were to go to prison, and so looked for ways to have at least one sexual encounter before a worst-case scenario could come to pass. April 2012, Chris declared that he finally lost his virginity. This was later confirmed to be true... at the hands of a prostitute. Chris reneged on the "true love" part of his Love Quest and skipped straight to the point, which seemed to satisfy him in the short run but otherwise wasn't a life-changing experience for him. 2012 was otherwise uneventful, probably because Chris was in trouble with the law and spent less time online than usual.

2013 saw Chris's online presence more or less confined to ranting on Facebook and Twitter, as well as making himself a pariah to people in real life through his actions. He began blaming people to their face for his own shortcomings which resulted in him leaving his church, getting chewed out by a voice actress from one of his favorite shows, upsetting the few friends he had left with his homophobia and getting thrown out of a Walmart for committing blatant vandalism. He has also complained about the "stress" taking its toll on his health (this, at least, is evident) and pined incessantly about being "lonely." Even the "gal-pals" Chris so fondly talked about in his high school days would end up betraying him – he found out around Halloween 2013 that they had only tolerated him out of pity and, having discovered his antics, were just as revolted by them as the next sane person. Of course, the miseries Chris was lamenting at this time were almost entirely products of his own behavior coming back to haunt him, something he clearly did not realize.

The year 2013 also saw the rise of quite a few new white knights as well (including actual friends he met in real life) all of whom tried to offer constructive advice to Chris, although their advice was unwelcome information and thus totally ignored, as tradition dictates. This year of Chris's life seemed to have been most characterized by his flagrant disrespect of people, things and ideas around him, resulting in his exile and loneliness which he idiotically (but predictably) did not connect with his appalling behavior.

At first, it seemed that 2014 would just be business as usual. That is, until January 10th when an extension cord leading from the bathroom to a coffee maker in the hallway – which was placed in such a location due to the nature of Barb's compulsive hoarding habits, and had become frayed due to the constant closing of the door – sparked and set the house on fire.[28] While no human was seriously harmed, one of the Chandler cats died in the fire. The resulting damages forced Chris and his mother to temporarily move out and trash a different house. Some of the Chandler possessions were destroyed in the fire, including most of Bob's huge record collection.

Chris and his mother ran into acute financial difficulties as a result of the house fire on top of their existing income issues, and Chris had spent most of the year alternating between begging for money and taking commissions to make more of his artwork on Facebook, and selling autographed photos of himself on eBay (with it being pretty clear who most of his patrons were). Despite the severity of the Chandler family's financial issues, Chris chose to blow literally thousands of dollars on children's toys instead of working to resolve his debts. Naturally, his "art" and photographs are only really of any value to fans, who purchased these items as a means to keep a roof over Chris's head.

In July, Chris was catfished once more by a new sweetheart named Catherine after meeting her through OKCupid. She met up with him in Ruckersville and surreptitiously recorded his conversations. The relationship lasted through the end of the year, and through this process, it was learned that Chris pierced his taint, with other media tied to Chris's life leaking as Catherine and cooperating trolls uncovered more details about his then-current life and mindset.

Chris began identifying as a lesbian in August 2014, and denied that there is no such thing as a male lesbian (citing Yahoo! Answers as proof). While he seemed to soften his stance on gay men (very reluctantly), he also indicated that he hated his own genitalia, in addition to his pre-existing hatred of pickles in general. Chris also took up attending LGBTQ events around Charlottesville, including attending a Halloween party at a gay bar dressed as a lesbian from the 70s. At such events, he obviously mingled with people infinitely more accepting and kind than himself. Naturally, it was only a matter of time before Chris would make a more serious commitment to his lifestyle change when he officially began to transition.

Transgender Era

Main articles: 2014, 2015, 2016, and 2017
The future shock... Me? Actually a woman? It is a lot to process. But as I recall my past, I remember in high school, my habits and nature were recognized as most feminine. And in comparing it to my experiences with the masculine, I find I actually don't like such brutish things. And looking deep in my heart and soul, I actually find I feel more woman than the male I was born as. And the more I open myself to that plausible... I truly feel more at peace with myself. I love me. I am woman! Roar!
Chris's fictionalized counterpart explaining his philosophy before becoming transgender in Sonichu #11.
Chris in 2016.

In early December 2014, Chris informed those closest to him to start referring him with female pronouns, indicating his desire to go from being a crossdresser to becoming transgender. This era started with a bang when, in December, Chris violated a ban and assaulted an employee in an outing to GameStop on Boxing Day. He assaulted the store's Assistant Manager, who was calling security, with mace; showing that, again, Chris has yet to learn anything from his mistakes, if he even regards them as mistakes to begin with. On top of this, Chris subsequently caused another ruckus at Walmart, just in case you started feeling bad for him after being duped by yet another fake girlfriend. Chris ultimately spent a night in the slammer, and following a lengthy legal process, got off with a $541 fine and a six-month suspended sentence.

More generally, 2015 saw Chris slowly shy away from his traditional bigotry towards men and homosexuals (while still keeping up his ludicrous crusade against Sega over the color scheme of a certain cartoon hedgehog and dramatizing his experience with trolls), and finally develop enough self-awareness to try and know himself. He indicated in several Facebook posts that he was still trying to gauge his own sexuality and sexual identity; for some time, he yo-yoed between wanting to remain a crossdresser and wanting to transition into womanhood.

Chris performed the sequels to some of his greatest hits in 2016:

Original Sequel
Recycling Chris's Specimen Sample
For Julie's Eyes Only Lesbian Sex Audition
Carlos Chantor Stephanie Bustcakes
Un-clit Self-inflicted taint wound
Chris in 2017, donning his unicorn cosplay at Cville Pride.

In addition, Barb was sued by two banks, due to failure to pay over $20,000 of debt, kicking off the Financhu Crisis, in which she and Chris both begged for money like jackasses, while their hoards of things that they could sell were clearly visible behind them. The Business saga was suspended when Chris was banned from Etsy for failing to send orders. He continued to duck responsibility for his inability to put down the PS4 controller long enough to slap together his preschool-level arts and crafts, choosing to blame Lulu for being "the bugger that bit my ass bad and killed my creative groove."

His Oedipal complex veered into disturbing new levels when he freely announced that he dreams about having sex with his mother. He also made multiple death threats against political figures Donald Trump and Mike Pence.

Chris with the Teen Troon Squad in 2018.

In 2017, the Financhu Crisis continued to stress the Chandlers. Chris offered pieces of his late father's stamp collection, the Sonic Totem and The Classic for sale in order to afford more toys, a $400 gold necklace for Barb, and the extremely costly expenses for his raffle prizes. He and Barb also continued begging. One of his friends from The End Games Pokémon Club grew concerned and gave him solid advice on how to apply for work through Virginia's DARS program – and in true Chris fashion, instead of following it, he went on an angry tirade. Later in the year, he was sued for failure to pay a debt to Mariner Finance.

Chris rediscovered Twitter in March. His frequent tweets to voice actresses lead to the Doopie saga – in which he was chastised for calling her darling, but doubled down on it and was subsequently blocked by her – and getting blocked by My Little Pony voice actress Tabitha St. Germain due to her getting constantly tagged by Chris and the weens orbiting him. He created sockpuppet accounts NightStar2891 to plead his case and TwiSparLicious to ban-evade, which failed.

He briefly joined the Kiwi Farms forum under the name LegendaryChristorian and held a Q&A session.

A high point for his social life was attending BronyCon, at which he enjoyed attention from fans. He also attended LGBT events such as UVA Remembers Pulse (where he was interviewed on TV), Cville Pride (where he was photographed by news in crowd shots), and Love is Love.

Chris resumed the Business saga halfway through the year by going back to work on the Sonichu #11 comic he had abandoned in 2015, by placing pages behind Patreon. He also again offered books for sale, self-published by Lulu, was paid to be interviewed by Merryweathery and CopperCab, and joined Redbubble. After eight years, he finally completed #11, and moved onto #12, which he completed after a few months. He began work on Sonichu #12-9 and Sonichu #15, but got distracted. His Patreon efforts also began to languish around October, when patrons complained that he hadn't been sending out books.

Another sweetheart saga took place in the fall. Jessica Quinn, a long-time white knight, suddenly turned troll by pretending she had fallen in love with him. She broke up with him twice, the first time he cried on camera for her to take him back, and the final time, he raged on video against the trolls he thought were to blame. He recovered quickly after drowning his sorrows at an ice cream shop.

Goddess Era

Main articles: 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, and 2021
I, Sonichu, have tried and kept on and continuing on until that day in the new Pandemic-Free version of this, the Omega Timeline – 'cause I'm going back in time with this body, after I get back to C-197 – finally return this body to mama in the new timeline at BABSCon. I tell you all, as overpowered a soul I am – in my own body that I was used to and accustomed with and everything – I, Sonichu, am unable to do Mama's job as good as only she, our OG Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu, of Earths 1218 and C-197, can do. This work, her body, her brain, her Goddess-level overpowers and abilities; they're all literally tailored and custom-made only for her... All praise, prayers, and power to our Goddess of 1218 and C-197: Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu!
Chris, pretending to be Sonichu, completely going off of the deep end while talking about the Dimensional Merge.
Chris in 2019 with a custom LEGO minifigure representing his godsona, CPU Blue Heart.

After having his heart shattered yet again, Chris began to be influenced by another troll, the Idea Guy, who role-played as his imaginary friends and convinced him that he was providing information from CWCville's dimension, which Chris accepted out of having his fantasy world validated; along the way, another Idea Guy joined with the first. Together, they used their influence over Chris's beliefs to brainwash Chris into believing several things about himself, such as the idea that he was bisexual and half-Sonichu, which ultimately culminated in Chris developing a Messiah complex derived from his own delusions about the nature of reality and the lore of Hyperdimension Neptunia.

Chris in 2020, moments before giving a sermon of the allegedly imminent Dimensional Merge.

When it was learned that the Idea Guys were extorting Chris, who was already facing financial difficulties, The Captain and Marvin intervened, forcing the Idea Guys out from Chris's life over the course of the subsequent months, however Chris retained much of the Idea Guys' brainwashing. The Captain, Marvin, and Null – a group called the Guard Dogs by onlookers from Kiwi Farms – attempted to protect Chris from further bad actors by screening his messages, however, the Teen Troon Squad managed to evade them by meeting with Chris in person. The Guard Dogs alleged them to have role-played as Chris's imaginary friend Magi-Chan and Chris's retreated more into his fantasy world while under their enabling influence, although they stopped contacting Chris when they saw what happened to the Idea Guys.

Chris repeatedly denounced the Idea Guys for financially exploiting him, but the damage was done to his psyche: Chris bought into the fantasy that he was a goddess as a new coping mechanism, and his already-shaky grasp on reality hit rock bottom. Chris's new beliefs led him to seek a hippie makeover befitting of his supposed psychic prowess, and he retreated further into his fantasies, generally refusing to engage with people who wouldn't entertain them. Chris eventually turned on Null, thanks to the influence of other trolls – chief among them, Jacob Sockness, who sought to sexually exploit Chris. The Guard Dogs realized that there was nothing that they could do for a Chris who refused to listen, and disbanded, but a new group, known as the Watchmen (who enabled some of Chris's fantasies out of pragmatism), sought to keep Chris from further embarrassing or endangering himself, successfully getting him away from Sockness before he could do any harm to Chris.

Throughout all of this, Chris's belief in the Dimensional Merge has not wavered. When it didn't arrive on the prophesied date of November 18, 2018, Chris did what all doomsday cultists and religious fundamentalists do whenever the apocalypse doesn't happen: he pushed it back again and again. Not helping matters was the advent of COVID-19, which Chris saw as a sign of the Dimensional Merge's progress alongside all the other insane crap that happened in the year 2020. For Chris, things really took a turn for the worse when BABSCon got canceled, and he began an elaborate coping scheme to live-action roleplay as Sonichu until he could attend My Little Pony conventions again. Chris spent nearly eleven months pretending to be his original character, with very few interruptions, before eventually reverting to being himself again on 25 February 2021, thanks to the intervention of an enabler, to personally oppose news about the My Little Pony G5 reboot.

During this time, Chris's appearance visibly aged significantly, with his hair turning grey. He's also seemingly lost a bit of weight, not due to improving his diet and leading a less sedentary lifestyle, but due to a decline in muscular mass. This is likely a result of the effects of the hormones that he has applied to treat his gender dysphoria, alongside his declining physical health due to his various poor life decisions. In addition to his existing health problems, he's also taken up drinking to excess and even smoking weed on occasion, which both do his so-called "overpowered" goddess body absolutely no favors. Compared to Megan Schroeder, who is four years younger than he is and currently looks pretty close to how she did in photographs with Chris about thirteen years ago, Chris now looks like he could pass for her aunt or uncle. Chris also continued to be influenced by enablers such as Larry Vaughn, KwaiiSandbag, and Praetor, the last of which is a group that seeks to exploit his infamy for sales revenue. The Watchmen, an enabler/white knight group, splintered following internal conflict among its members.[29]

Downfall Era

Main articles: 2021, 2022, 2023, Affair with Mother, and Jail Saga
So there you go, chat: the Dimensional Merge is happening right fucking now! Chris, our boy Chris, bravo! Bravo, brave young man! I guess you could say, uh, that he really, really came into his own. And in case it's not already fucking obvious, Chris is going to jail. So we'll see how that works out. Best of luck Chris! Don't drop the soap, buddy. The world you lived in was just a fantasyland, but reality... Reality is a motherfucker.
A deepfake of Mister Metokur, made prior to Chris spending two years behind bars and dealing with the legal system.[30]
Chris fought the law and the law won... Well, kinda.
Chris in 2021 after being arrested, naïvely anticipating a short stay in the slammer. "Why, she wouldn't even harm a fly!"

After nearly a decade of a slow downward spiral in nearly all aspects of Chris's life following Bob's death, his future did not look particularly bright. By 2021, Chris had largely reduced his online activities to posting long Twitter threads of faux-philosophical ramblings reflecting his New Age Retro Hippie mindset, which bordered on being incomprehensible or esoteric. At the same time, the Chandler family's debt steadily rose, largely due to Barb and her son's poor spending habits. For a while it was speculated that, in the extremely likely event that Chris outlived Barb, the situation would get worse for Chris with nobody to ground him in reality, along with the increased possibility that he could become homeless if he were to be evicted. Not to mention that Chris was virtually unemployable in any career after years of having every detail about his past leak out to the Internet, and he hadn't made a real effort to get a job since his attempt to win Kacey's heart, after his short-lived stints working at fast food joints or in multi-level marketing.

Chris in 2022, after being returned to Central Virginia Regional Jail. This is what nine months behind bars does to a motherfucker.

However, there was fleetingly a period in which there was a greater degree of hope for Chris. Chris successfully reconciled with Null, who eventually helped organize a trip for Chris so that he could attend Everfree Northwest, a My Little Pony convention, on the condition that Chris would complete commission work in exchange for his donations. Null believed this was a worthy effort to see if he could sustain himself as an adult through self-employment, particularly ahead of Barb's death. Chris actually kept up with these obligations, doing a considerable amount of work compared to previous months of less output, while appearing to get a good degree of satisfaction out of his work, on top of making it a semi-stable career out of it. All seemed relatively normal for Chris as far as the post-Idea Guys status quo went, and some fans anticipated the possibility that Chris, now upset about MLP G5, would do something amusing at the convention as he prepared for the trip, just like old times. Chris also informed Null, Don Lashomb, The WCT, several members of The Knights of CWC, and Isabella Loretta Janke that he was having a romantic relationship with an older woman, giving all of them various hints to her identity.

What happened next turned everything completely on its head. Chris would not, in fact, be going to Everfree Northwest. He would not be going to any future convention, for that matter, as the point of no return was finally passed after years of online infamy.

On the night of 27 July 2021, Chris initiated a video call with Bella. He bragged to her about sexual acts that he committed with his own mother – a felony – over the course of several weeks. Bella partially recorded the call when Chris began speaking of those actions. He also texted her with more details. Bella shared the files with her friends, and those circulated and were publicly leaked on 30 July.

While trolls joked about Chris potentially committing incest before, few actually believed that he was capable of acting on those impulses and taking advantage of an elderly (and possibly senile) woman. Once these details got out, nothing would ever be the same: he and Barb were separated by the authorities, he had to vacate his only home due to a week-long protective order, he was very quickly banned from the convention that he'd hoped to attend, and his Patreon account – one of his few real sources of income – was taken down. Null quickly washed his hands of Chris for good, not only after learning that the audio leak was legitimate, but also when he realized that Chris effectively stole approximately $750 from Barb to fund his stay at a hotel.

Chris in 2023, at the end of his stay in jail. Note the weight loss compared to his first mugshot and Chris's improved mood compared to his second.

Chris was arrested on 1 August 2021, an event which was live-streamed by multiple orbiters. The incest revelation and the ensuing drama resulted in several people associated with Chris cutting ties with him – such as Don Lashomb, The WCT, and Fiona. Other people continue to interact with Chris such as Kenneth Engelhardt, Caden Peck, Helena Fiorenza, and Eels and the Eggman. Chris's actions during this time trended on social media, leading less Internet-savvy netizens to either discover Chris for the first time or to rediscover him after years of fading into obscurity. The massive social media reaction to the news led to Chris's actions being covered by various news outlets – most notably, a dedicated segment on Fox News's Tucker Carlson Tonight, the most popular show on the network at the time, which in turn exposed him to millions of retired, right-wing baby boomers.

Chris spent the next several months in Central Virginia Regional Jail after being arrested by the Henrico County sheriff's department, awaiting a court hearing set for 28 July 2022, following three continuances. While waiting in jail, Chris's delusions of godhood spiraled out of control as he began believing himself to be Jesus of Nazareth reincarnated and the Dimensional Merge to be proceeding entirely as planned. During this time, Chris kept in touch with the outside world via a multitude of Jail Communications discussing a variety of subjects, from his jail conditions to his renewed interest in the Bible and ween attempts to convert him to Islam through reading the Qur'an. These letters and phone calls also revealed that Chris had been kept in protective custody for his own safety.

Early into March 2022, it was learned that Chris was transferred out of jail into the Western State Hospital mental institution. During this time, Chris was isolated from the outside world; what he was up to while there will most likely remain unknown unless Chris opens up about what happened (assuming that he says anything not affected by his own fantasies, which seems like wishful thinking). He returned to CVRJ on 3 May 2022, with a new mugshot taken upon his arrival, showing that Chris appeared much more gaunt than before and had lost a substantial amount of weight. Unfortunately, subsequent mail correspondence indicated that his time away from jail had not caused him to face reality, as he opted to double down on his fantasies.

On 28 July 2022, only a day before the first anniversary of the leaking of the infamous incest call, Chris finally had his court hearing after three delays. In the process, it was determined that the case would be going before a grand jury for at least one felony incest charge. However, Chris's lawyer filed a motion for autism disorder deferred disposition. Following months of excessive online interest in the case, Chris's lawyer eventually managed to convince the court to seal the case on 11 August 2022, with "waive right to indictment" and "transportation order" added to his case file. The exact meaning of these legal maneuvers remains unknown.

Second Coming Era

Main articles: 2023, 2024, Post-jail sightings (2023), Sightings (2024), and Second Coming
BEWARE ALL TOXIC HATERS, SINNERS, AND DARKEST DEMONICS, FOR I AM Jesus Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu, the Goddess Blue Heart, and your lord and god. AND I BRING, PERSONALLY, THE SECOND COMING.
From "Holy Jesus Christ Chan Sonichu Prime", posted on DeviantART in August 2023.
Free as fuck.

The Jail Saga seemed to fit very nicely as the culmination to Chris's story before he faded into obscurity, conveniently coinciding with Chris's foreshadowing that his entire timeline would be thrown in chaos, and bookending his story with a period where he had to sit alone in a dark room all day – this time behind a cell instead of a room full of toys. Surely after 14 years of lolcow adventures, Chris spending much of the rest of his life incarcerated was a fitting end. In the event that he got released, he would find his life absolutely ruined, with him destined to remain off the Internet forever, perhaps even homeless, until the day he dies.

Though every good story needs a sequel, right?

After spending around two years in jail, the Internet was shocked when it was announced that Chris was suddenly released on 27 March 2023. VineLink initially reported that he was bonded out[31] before updating their files to say he was released by court order.[32] Chris was able to avoid another round of Kick the Autistic thanks to his lawyer David Heilberg successfully filing for a motion for an autism disorder deferred disposition.

Chris was temporarily moved to Gateway Homes, a group home, as part of conditions imposed by the deferred disposition.[33] Silence ensued for the entire month of April 2023. In the months after May 2023, Chris started getting spotted around Chesterfield County, Virginia doing random activities, such as shopping and playing card games. In a few sightings, Chris was seen with a new Sonichu Medallion, waning away some hope that Chris had actually improved. Any remaining hope disappeared when Chris signed a receipt as "J. Christ Chan Sonichu."

In June 2023, Caden Peck and an LLC purchased a property in Big Island, VA, and at some point, Chris moved into the house. Through out the entire month of August 2023, after Chris's incest case being set to "Resolved Order Pending,"[34] Chris started rapidly becoming active in random places of the Internet, progressively setting new milestones, and receiving a surprisingly warm Enabler/White-Knight-filled welcome back.

On 23 August 2023, Chris made his first post-jail social media posts on DeviantART as he mass-posted unseen art made during his period of inactivity, new work on Sonichu comics, and custom Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipfic Folder cards.

Chris, having a normal one in a 2024 livestream, where he swears he hasn't been watching hentai.

Just two days later, Chris's incest case was entirely dismissed, officially making Chris a free man.[35] While some people were upset that Chris had once again gotten off with a mere slap on the wrist while also feeling cheated by the justice system, many would watch with anticipation what Chris would do next. He was later spotted at 14 Branchland Court, with it being unclear if Barb was present at the time of his visit. The house was seen empty a few days later, but Barb was since seen living there with all of her animals, being taken care off by a caretaker. That day also marked the first of many sightings of a mysterious girl, dubbed "Food Lion Lady", "Meryl", "Egg", or even "Cabbage Patch".

By 16 October 2023, Chris would make his full return to the Internet by uploading a bizarre video of himself singing two parodies of songs from the Pokémon 2.B.A. Master album in front of a green screen with clips of Chris dancing overlaid on top of the video throughout. It is likely that Praetor was behind the editing of the video. The next day, Chris would upload another video “Setting the record straight,” giving his side of the story in which he denied ever having sex with Barb, faked the story in order to troll Isabella Loretta Janke, incorrectly claimed the court found him innocent (the incest charge was dismissed following Chris's lawyer's request for an autism disorder deferred disposition; he was not acquitted by a jury), rambled on about his newfound delusions of being the reincarnation of Jesus Christ, and revealed the identity of the mysterious woman he'd been seen with in recent months, introducing her as Flutter.

In the following weeks, Chris would livestream himself playing games while weens would send him donations and text messages with old outdated memes, in order to get a rise out of him. Ironically, this has allowed Chris to earn upwards of $600 per stream from the pockets of the very weens that mess with him. Surprisingly, Chris has been keeping information about himself rather vague when answering questions in his Q&A livestreams. In January 2024, Chris was able to attend his first convention since his release from jail, though he was escorted out by security on the second day after his infamous reputation caught up to him and the weens reported him to the convention staff.

At least twice, Chris traveled to Finland with Flutter.

As of right now, Chris remains at large, but is mostly keeping to himself as outsiders continue peering into his strange life.

Featured Fan Videos

I really don't think you will ever get it. It's probably too late now anyways.
Null realizes Chris is beyond help.


CWC ~ A Sad Story
Direct link Youtube, archive
Stardate 20 November 2009
Made By IBAClydeCash
TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos


Chris Chan ~ Ruler of Everything
Direct link Youtube, archive
Stardate 4 March 2021
Made By First Son
TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos


I Miss The Old Chris Chan
Direct link Youtube, archive
Stardate 16 August 2021
Made By Fdawg9097
TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos

See also

CWCipedia logo.png
For Truth and Honesty, see the archived CWCipedia page on Christian Weston Chandler
Pickles.jpg
Tired of "Good Fan Art"? Visit our constantly expanding Gallery of Evil Fan Art! There's even a whole section dedicated to Chris!

Notes

  1. Chris attended Presbyterian, Baptist, and Methodist churches at various points in his life.

References

  1. File:Kookydash.png
  2. https://archive.fo/v5aVW
  3. Internet Dream Lounge#Outro .281:12:27-1:16:25.29
  4. Jail Letter - 16 November 2021
  5. Keffals_videos#The_Chris_Chan_Interview
  6. File:Miss Cherry asks Chris about his marriages.png
  7. Tomboys And Tomgirls of Virginia#We've been found AND mocked horribly! :(
  8. Confirmed by placement in the Therapeutic Docket.
  9. "glass house", a post from LiveJournal user thereisbeautyin.
  10. Kiwi Farms posts (Marvin)#Perspective on Chris's social life
  11. Chris Destroys His Vibrator
  12. CWC with Bible - Leviticus
  13. File:Court Record - 2016 Name Change from Christian to Christine (Chris, CL16000067-00).png
  14. File:Christine license.jpg
  15. File:Trespass case 2018.png
  16. Image:Court Record - 2019 Midland Funding Debt Case, Garnishment (Chris, GV18000451-01).png
  17. Chris's Wikipedia profile
  18. 18.0 18.1 18.2 User:ChrisChanSonichu profile#His Early Years - Birth to 1992
  19. 6 March 2007 email from Cole to Chris, page 3
  20. Aspergers (CWCipedia article)
  21. Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares, page 4
  22. Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007
  23. Sonichu #7, [1]
  24. DVD, graduation note 2
  25. Story of My Current Days#Story of My Current Days
  26. Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares, page 10.
  27. http://web.archive.org/web/20071107074539/http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2667671&userid=0&perpage=40&pagenumber=1
  28. BraveryJerk Interviews
  29. The Lainchu Manifesto
  30. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=saeC2T4Be8k
  31. File:VineLink Out of Custody 27 March 2023.png
  32. File:VineLink Out of Custody 27 March 2023 - 1 49 pm update.png
  33. Medallion Moulding Q&A
  34. File:Court Record - Greene Circuit Court - Incest - (Chris, CR22000141-00) - 8 August 2023.png
  35. File:Court Record - Greene Circuit Court - Incest - (Chris, CR22000141-00) - 25 August 2023.png

External links

Christian Weston Chandler at the Internet Movie Database

    People