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2017

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Ongoing

The things described in this article are still happening, so it may be subject to frequent change.

2017 is the ninth year of organized trolling. It will also mark the tenth anniversary of Chris' discovery by 4chan and the creation of the original Encyclopedia Dramatica article.

President Donald Trump took office on 20 January, in the midst of Chris' ongoing Financhu Crisis. Despite these obstacles, Chris overcame his stress to resume work on Sonichu in earnest and develop a slightly healthier social life. He began to recognize the gravity of his financial situation and tried to improve it by pawning off his most iconic possessions and shilling for his Patreon. On the other hand, he began harassing an online artist in an attempt to make a Sweetheart from the Ground-Up, only to incite a brief but intense period of old-fashioned trolling.

January

Main article: January 2017
Chris in January.

Pmurt was sworn in as the 45th President of the United States, over Chris's objections. Chris continued complaining about him on YouTube, Facebook and Twitter.

The Tomgirl saga continued, now in its sixth year and with no end in sight. Chris tried to donate blood but was told that he couldn't because he is transgender. A Breitbart News editor, Milo Yiannopoulos, briefly featured a photo of Chris, from his 2014 OKCupid profile, during a lecture. Chris's views on homos continued to evolve, as evidence by an open letter to President Trump's son, in which Chris commented about losing his homophobia while urging Barron not to become a "Super Stereotypical, Spiteful and Egotistical Male" like the elder Trump.

February

Main article: February 2017
Chris, in February. Pictured at top left, in the white jacket.

Chris was haunted by feelings of nostalgia for his past relationships with the gal pals from high school, Megan Schroeder and his late father. He also revisited an old playground from his childhood.

However, Chris continued to maintain an active social life. He saw The Lego Batman Movie with a friend and attended events at the University of Virginia.

Chris mentioned the world of CWCville again for the first time in years in the form of a text update; as a reaction to President Trump's policies, he declared CWCville to be a sanctuary city. He also revealed that several changes had occurred in his imaginary town since the last update. Namely, he had stepped down as mayor and Allison Amber had taken his place.

There were also bizarre new insights into his personal life. He theorized that he had a fetish for Sailor Moon music, posted that he was used to skunk odor (and compared it to perfume and cologne) and liked a Subliminal Frequency Hypnosis video purporting to transfer fat from his belly to his butt as part of a D.I.Y. gender transition treatment.

March

Main article: March 2017

Chris began March by listing stamps from his late father's collection on eBay. He repeatedly lied throughout the month that the money would go to bills and debtor payments - he had actually wasted the profit on toys and video games. Within a week, he had obliterated his profit and was in the red, leading him to beg on Facebook for more sales. White knights quickly bailed him out, raising $41.50 in a single day for him.

He briefly mentioned the world of CWCville again, as part of a business plan to advertise his stamp sales. On St. Patrick's Day, he posted a drawing of Son-Chu, leading to speculation about his reasons. A few days later, he set the record straight on his artistic inspiration for Son-Chu after reading the CWCki's article on it, posting a screenshot from the article onto his Facebook, in addition to two prototype designs of Son-Chu. A week later, on 27 March, he revealed a silhouette photo of a Son-Chu figure, as well as a picture of his Skylanders avatar and declared that those would be featured as prizes for a raffle to be held until 31 April. It led to another boost in sales, earning him $69.50 in revenue over the next five days.

Chris rediscovered Twitter, clocking in at 68 tweets throughout the month. His messages were generally directed to voice actresses from My Little Pony and DoopieDoOver (an animator and voice actress for the Planet Dolan YouTube series), and he also responded to a couple of trolls who had questioned his lesbian soul and asked his audience for opinions on a good 3D-scanning app for his phone.. Socially awkward as ever, his messages included:

  • a rant at Tara Strong and her friend about his half-brother Cole Smithey.
  • shitposting by discussing his pooping habit with Doopie.
  • asking a brony convention, based in California, for gas money to drive there from Virginia.
  • saying he was hypnotized by a gif of a furry.
  • hitting on Doopie by quoting a line from his "I'm Done Adulting" My Little Pony T-shirt.

April

Main article: April 2017
Return of The Classic.

During this month, Chris reached the one-year anniversary of the Financhu Crisis. Fittingly, he and Barb hit new levels of fiscal incompetence.

Barb failed to budget for payments to Seterus, Inc. (a company specializing in high-risk loans, acting as a middleman between her and the mortgage company, Sunstone). As a result, her bank account was left in the red by over $800. After Chris became aware of it, he noticed that his friends on Facebook (including a real-life, non-troll friend) were suggesting that he get a job, and he went on a tirade in response.

Hoping to raise money, Chris listed the infamous Sonic Totem relic on eBay, asking for $1,500. Ebay member ashuraglitch purchased it less than four hours later. However, Chris immediately wasted $1,150 from the sale on a $400 gold necklace for Barb and $750 worth of Skylanders products for a raffle contest he was holding. Over the next few days, he spent even more money on his own bills and could not afford to ship the Totem to ashuraglitch.

Halfway through the month, Barb begged on camera for the fourth time during the Financhu Crisis, claiming to need money for an overdue electrical bill, while wearing the newly-bought $400 gold necklace.

Eventually, Barb solved their problems by digging into their life insurance, after Chris's fans refused to bail him out of the financial hole and ashurasglitch opened an eBay dispute against him for failing to ship the Totem. Naïve to the how close they came to financial ruin, Chris continued frivolously spending money, ordering a Unicorn Frappuccino from Starbucks using the new supply of cash.

Looking for more stuff to sell, Chris found The Classic shirt, thought to have been lost in the Destruction of Chris's House, casually mentioning in his sales pitch that it had been found in a hoard of ruined clothing, which was still wet from firefighters' efforts to combat the house fire. Chris, naïve to the concept of mold, had gone digging anyway, and complained later of a sore throat from the "dirt" and "wall lining". He listed the shirt for $12,000 minimum, and trolls bid it to $25,100. April concluded with Chris making efforts to restore the damaged shirt.

May

Chris in May 2017, wearing $25,101 of clothes
Main article: May 2017

Chris repaired The Classic and hoped to sell it for thousands of dollars. He resumed work on Sonichu. Barb made a video appearance begging for cash.

June

Main article: June 2017
Yep, she's on TV - June 2017

Chris was spotted in the Mal-Wart Region by a fan. Chris was interviewed at a Pulse nightclub shooting memorial and finally finished Sonichu #11, then began work on Sonichu #12.

July

Main article: July 2017
Chris in July 2017

Chris continued with Sonichu #12 and hoped for a Crayola sponsorship. Later in the month, he began to interact more with DoopieDoOver, commissioning an idealized self-portrait from her which he began to use as his profile picture on Facebook and Twitter.

August

Main article: August 2017

The main events of the Doopie Saga took place in the first few days of August, as Chris drove Doopie away with creepy behavior, tried to win her back, and ultimately caused her to block him on Twitter and reveal details on their interactions to Kiwi Farms. In the midst of the saga, Chris also made a sockpuppet Twitter account which he initially denied any connection to, but soon confessed to operating.

Chris at BronyCon 2017

Chris went to BronyCon in Baltimore, where he had a mostly positive experience which helped restore his heart level after the Doopie Saga. He resumed work on Sonichu #12, discussed his plans to make more positive content, and watched the much-hyped transcontinental solar eclipse.

September

Main article: September 2017
The many faces of madness, September 2017

In September, Chris grew even closer to Jessica Quinn, finally declaring her the real-life Lovely Weather. He agreed to do an interview with the Internet Dream Lounge podcast to likely be released in October. After a few developments which trolls speculated might signal Chris's ongoing interest, the moribund Doopie Saga came to an end with Chris stating that he was over the incident. On what would be Bob's 90th birthday, Chris made an unusually personal video reading two previously private letters from his late father.

October

Main article: October 2017

Chris joined the Kiwi Farms for an Q&A with them. He also announced plans to meet Jessica Quinn in person on 6 October, only to have the relationship collapse the day before when Quinn shut down her Facebook account and broke up with him because of trolls reportedly hacking her Facebook account. This caused Chris to melt down in one of the most terrifying displays of tard rage since the start of the Tomgirl saga. The Internet Dream Lounge interview came out on 8 October.

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