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July was the seventh month of 2016.
Chris spent most of this month obsessed with money issues. He tried various hustles, even encouraging his mother to make a video request on YouTube. In the second half of the month, to the consternation of his fans, he drunkenly sliced open his taint and claimed the wound was a labia he had created through the magic of Subliminal Frequency Hypnosis. Alas, this proved not to be the case, and he remained trapped in his accursed male body into August.
- 1 July - Chris pays his court costs of $541, presumably with his tugboat, which arrives at the start of each month.
- 8 July - Chris uploads to YouTube his video Rainbows Unicorns and a Bluebird of Happiness Chapter 4, in which he reads another part of a story and asks for donations.
- 9 July - Chris uploads a video in which he complains about having to take care of Barb, his dogs, and his cats.
- 10 July - On Facebook, Chris asks for $20 or $50, whatever you can spare, really.
- 10 July - Chris posts three short videos in which he begs for cash and mugs for the camera: HELP, PLEASE!!!, Comic relief for money right now, and By random request; I still need money, please.
- 11 July - Chris releases another short video thanking his fans for the $20 he's received and, of course, asking for more.
- 12 July - Chris makes a short complaint on Facebook about how Knuckles is portrayed on Sonic Boom.
- 12 July - Chris leaves a review of Season 1 of Sonic Boom on Facebook.
- 13 July - Chris ropes Barb into performing a begging video.
- 13 July - Chris leaves two comments on Facebook saying that he is stressed, dizzy, and anxious.
- 13 July - Chris takes an online personality test which reveals that he is kind. He claims it makes him sexy.
- 13 July - Chris posts his Miitomo Friend code on Facebook.
- 13 July - Chris lists on eBay a promotional Pokemon card he won in a contest in 2000.
- 14 July - Chris puts two more old Pokemon cards up for sale on eBay for $100 each.
- 15 July - Chris lashes out on Facebook against those too cheap to give him free money. He adds that he is not on drugs.
- 17 July - On Facebook, Chris flatly states that he will not be responding to rumors about his personal life.
- 18 July - Chris posts a video shout-out for two fans. It marks the first appearance of the Captain's Log opening since 2010.
- 20 July - Chris is spotted at a gas station trying to pay for seven dollars worth of junk food with only five dollars. A field agent behind him gives him two ones to pay for the rest but Chris snatches it and marches right out of the store without paying the remainder.
- 20 July - Chris posts a paid video request in which he reads sarcastic comments that go over his head.
- 20 July - Chris uploads a video of himself reading copypasta.
- 21 July - Chris posts another paid video in which he wishes happy birthday to fan Nathan.
- 21 July - Fulfilling another request for a paid video, Chris posts Copypasta: Gorilla Warfare featuring another famous copypasta.
- 22 July - In a video, Chris sings The Beatles' "Yellow Submarine" in exchange for money.
- 22 July - Chris posts "Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Shake my boobies", a paid video request in which he shimmies around and grabs his tits.
- 22 July - Chris uploads another paid video in which he sings a song for fan Elisabeth.
- 22 July - Chris posts a paid video involving special messages for one Stephen.
- 23 July - Chris angrily claims on Facebook that he does not wear diapers, claiming that the accidental crotch shot in a recent video revealed only panties and pantyliner.
- 23 July - Chris is temporarily banned from Facebook for uploading an offensive video. Of course, he blames the individual who paid Chris to post it.
- 24 July - Chris cuts open his groin and thinks it means the hypnosis videos he's been watching have worked and that he's grown a "labia." He proudly announces the news on Facebook and encourages people to view the photos on Imgur.
- 24 July - Chris claims that he's had his "labia" examined and it is not infected.
- 24 July - On Facebook, Chris posts photos of his new driver's license and a "Woman Card" from Hillary Clinton's campaign. He hates on Trump.
- 24 July - In a Facebook post he would quickly remove, Chris lies that the Un-clit 2.0 photos were fakes.
- 26 July - Chris uploads a Paid Video Request Reminder announcing that his YouTube ban has been lifted, and that fans can request more paid videos.
- 27 July - Chris shares clickbait articles on body shaming and transgender issues.
- 28 July - Chris tells his Facebook followers that he likes Steven Universe.
- 28 July - Chris uploads Machine Romans, a paid video featuring himself reading a strange message.
- 29 July - Chris announces on Facebook that "household projects" will require him to postpone efforts to fulfill paid video requests.
- 30 July - Chris uploads a video in which he reads A Girl Who Brought Down the World.
- 30 July - Chris makes further complaints about A Girl Who Brought Down the World on Facebook.