Difference between revisions of "OkCupid"
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'''OkCupid''' | '''OkCupid''', one of the more popular [[dating]] websites, matches people based on how they respond to questions that they may answer at their leisure. Unlike sites such as [[Match.com]], OkCupid allows users to message and search each other for [[Chris and money|free]], only charging for perks like ad removal and unlimited inbox space. Like so many other [[dating profiles|dating websites]] before, [[Christian Weston Chandler]] joined this one with high hopes, and has renewed his profile many times, despite never successfully attracting anybody through it. | ||
{{TOC limit|2}} | {{TOC limit|2}} | ||
==CWCSONICHU profile== | ==CWCSONICHU profile== | ||
[[File:OkCupidProfile.jpg|thumb| | [[File:OkCupidProfile.jpg|thumb|Screencap of the profile.]] | ||
Chris created his first OkCupid profile in late [[February 2009]]. He gave up on it | Chris created his first OkCupid profile in late [[February 2009]]. He gave up on it quickly, and he never answered any of the questions or quizzes that the site uses to build a personality profile of each user. It's likely he quit using it after girls failed to flood his inbox with offers of [[True and Honest]] [[China|love]]. In the usual Chris style, the profile is woefully incomplete, featuring only a very brief personal summary, and a looking-for box in which he checked every available option, including "casual [[sex]]". | ||
While mildly entertaining, this profile | While mildly entertaining, this profile didn't last long; after a short time it was hacked by [[troll]]s. Fortunately, Chris would make more profiles in the future. | ||
{{collapsible|Profile text|I am [[Autistic]], Fun, and [[Plagiarism|Creative]]. | |||
I am [[Autistic]], Fun, and Creative. | |||
'''My Self-Summary''' | '''My Self-Summary''' | ||
I'm [[naive|young at heart]]. I'm currently writing a [[comic]] book, and I've written quite a few issues so far. I am a bit shy, but I would enjoy the company of a beautiful girl who likes some of the things I do. I also like to have fun when I can, and I don't really like to be alone. | I'm [[naive|young at heart]]. I'm currently writing a [[comic]] book, and I've written quite a few issues so far. I am a bit [[Autism|shy]], but I would enjoy the company of [[Boyfriend-free girl|a beautiful girl]] who likes some of the things I do. I also like to have fun when I can, and I don't really like to be alone. | ||
I graduated from [[Manchester High School|high school]] on the [[Honor Roll]], and I am doing very well at [[PVCC]]. A lot of [[ | I graduated from [[Manchester High School|high school]] on the [[Honor Roll]], and I am doing very well at [[PVCC]]. A lot of [[JERKS|men]] make false promises to their girlfriends, but [[List of Chris's lies|I am totally different.]] When it comes to what I can offer, I can seriously promise [[Monthly tugboat|care]], [[Women's rights|respect]], [[Chris and death|empathy]], and [[Chris and anger|love]]. I think that (most) girls deserve the world, and I would do my best to give it to them. | ||
I haven't had the best of luck with girlfriends in my past. There was a lot of lying and backstabbing [[Chris and Hypocrisy|done to me]], and I'm looking for someone who is honest and will love me for me. | I haven't had the best of luck with girlfriends in my past. There was a lot of lying and backstabbing [[Chris and Hypocrisy|done to me]], and I'm looking for someone who is honest and will love me for me. | ||
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Who I'd like to meet: | Who I'd like to meet: | ||
Someone with a happy, positive personality, young at heart, very pretty, 18-23-years old, lives in, or around, the [[Charlottesville]] or [[Ruckersville]] (both in the state of [[Virginia]]) areas, [[Tobacky|smoke]]-free, non-[[alcohol|alcholoic]], [[Racism|white]] and [[Boyfriend- | Someone with a happy, positive personality, young at heart, very pretty, 18-23-years old, lives in, or around, the [[Charlottesville]] or [[Ruckersville]] (both in the state of [[Virginia]]) areas, [[Tobacky|smoke]]-free, non-[[alcohol|alcholoic]], [[Racism|white]] and [[Boyfriend-free girl|does not already have a Boyfriend]]. | ||
'''My Details''' | |||
Looking for: [[gal pal|New friends]], Long-term dating, Short-term dating, Activity partners, [[PandaHalo|Long-distance penpals]], [[Hanky panky|Casual sex]]}} | |||
OKCupid has a variety of other fields such as religion, height, race | OKCupid has a variety of other fields such as religion, height, and race, all of which Chris left blank. | ||
==ChrisCSonichu profile== | ==ChrisCSonichu profile== | ||
[[File:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|Chris's profile image, recycled from his adventures as [[The Hook Cafe|direct2sex]].]] | [[File:Personalprofile.jpg|thumb|Chris's profile image, recycled from his adventures as [[The Hook Cafe|direct2sex]].]] | ||
Chris's return to OkCupid | Chris's return to OkCupid started on 4 [[April 2009]] under the name "ChrisCSonichu". This was a much more involved affair than his earlier profile, as Chris updated this profile frequently. These updates slowly changed the page from a badly written but largely benign profile into a violently insane, sex-obsessed manifesto about how awesome Chris is, and how hot girls should be having sex with him. This slow evolution from stupid and relatively innocent to stupid, filthy and deranged can be found in virtually every chronological thing Chris has ever made or done, but is perhaps most evident in his [[Sonichu (comic)|''Sonichu'' comics]]. | ||
In the subsections below, editor's notes and translations are marked in Italics. | |||
The earliest saved version we have of Chris's page is relatively harmless. Chris makes an ass of himself in two languages, and refers to himself as a creative genius, but on the whole there's nothing too outlandish. | ===First version=== | ||
The earliest saved version we have of Chris's page is relatively harmless. Chris makes an ass of himself in two languages, and refers to himself as a creative genius, but on the whole there's nothing too outlandish. Unfortunately, this simple, placid version of the profile was the calm before the storm. | |||
{{-}} | {{-}} | ||
{| | {{collapsible|Profile text of the first version| | ||
'''My Self-Summary''' | |||
| | |||
I'm [[Pedofork|young at heart]]. I have a [[Sonichu (comic)|comic book series]]. I would [[Sex|enjoy the company]] of a beautiful woman who likes some of the things I do. I also like to have fun when I am able to, and do acts of kindness when possible. | |||
I'm young at heart. I have a [[Sonichu (comic)|comic book series]]. I would enjoy the company of a beautiful woman who likes some of the things I do. I also like to have fun when I am able to, and do acts of kindness when possible. | |||
I graduated from high school on the [[Honor Roll]], and I have graduated from [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|Piedmong Virginia Community College]] with a Degree and a Certificate in [[CADD|Computer Aided Drafting and Design]]. When it comes to what I can offer, I can seriously promise care, respect, empathy, and love. I think that (most) women deserve the world, and I would do my best to give it to them. | I graduated from [[high school]] on the [[Honor Roll]], and I have graduated from [[Piedmont Virginia Community College|Piedmong Virginia Community College]] with a Degree and a Certificate in [[CADD|Computer Aided Drafting and Design]]. When it comes to what I can offer, I can seriously promise care, respect, empathy, and love. I think that (most) women deserve the world, and I would do my best to give it to them. | ||
I am looking for a woman who is [[honest]] and will love me for me; a woman with a happy, positive personality, young at heart, pretty, 21-28-years old, lives in, or around, the Charlottesville or Ruckersville (both in the state of Virginia) areas, [[Tobacky|smoke-free]], non-[[Niggos|black]] and single. | I am looking for a woman who is [[honest]] and will love me for me; a woman with a happy, positive personality, young at heart, pretty, 21-28-years old, lives in, or around, the Charlottesville or Ruckersville (both in the state of Virginia) areas, [[Tobacky|smoke-free]], non-[[Niggos|black]] and single. | ||
'''Now in Spanish''' | '''Now in [[Spanish]]''' | ||
Yo soy joven en mi corizon. Yo tengo un serie de libros comicos. Me gusta la compaña de una mujer bonita quién la gusta mas o menos de las cosas me gusta. Me gusta tener diversion cuando posible, y hago hechos de benevolencia cuando posible. | Yo soy joven en mi corizon. Yo tengo un serie de libros comicos. Me gusta la compaña de una mujer bonita quién la gusta mas o menos de las cosas me gusta. Me gusta tener diversion cuando posible, y hago hechos de benevolencia cuando posible. | ||
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Yo estoy buscando por una mujer honesta y va a amor mi por mi; una mujer con una personalidad feliz y positiva, joven en su corizon, bonita, tenga 21-28 anos, resida en, o cerca de, Charlottesville o Ruckersvlle, VA, Sin Fumar, no es negra y soltero. | Yo estoy buscando por una mujer honesta y va a amor mi por mi; una mujer con una personalidad feliz y positiva, joven en su corizon, bonita, tenga 21-28 anos, resida en, o cerca de, Charlottesville o Ruckersvlle, VA, Sin Fumar, no es negra y soltero. | ||
'''What I’m doing with my life''' | |||
I'm keeping it real; taking it one day at a time working on | |||
I'm keeping it real; taking it one day at a time working on [[PlayStation 3|my projects]] and helping my family. | |||
'''I’m really good at''' | |||
[[Chris and art|Drawing]], [[Chris and writing|writing]], [[Chris and art|crafting]], [[The MovingFoward videos|making well-thought decisions]], [[51 50|heavy lifting]] and other things. | |||
'''The first things people usually notice about me''' | |||
I would have to give it to [[The Creepy Stare|my face]], especially in in-person times. When I look at other people, I notice their faces first most often. | |||
I would have to give it to my face, especially in in-person times. When I look at other people, I notice their faces first most often. | |||
'''My favorite books, movies, music, and food''' | |||
Goosebumps or Fear Street Novels from R.L. Stein; "[[Mary Poppins]]" is my favorite movie of all time; I like most kinds of [[Chris and music|music]] (but my favorite singer is [[Britney Spears]]); Mac & Cheese, Grilled Chicken. | |||
Goosebumps or Fear Street Novels from [[R.L. Stine|R.L. Stein]]; "[[Mary Poppins]]" is my favorite movie of all time; I like most kinds of [[Chris and music|music]] (but my favorite singer is [[Britney Spears]]); Mac & Cheese, [[McDonald's|Grilled Chicken]]. | |||
'''The six things I could never do without''' | |||
-(After I've found the one) My [[Sweetheart|Girlfriend/Sweetheart]]. | -(After I've found the one) My [[Sweetheart|Girlfriend/Sweetheart]]. | ||
<br>-My [[video games|Video Games]] ([[PS3]], [[PSP]], [[Nintendo|DS and Wii]], and all of my older consoles). | <br>-My [[video games|Video Games]] ([[PlayStation 3|PS3]], [[PSP]], [[Nintendo|DS and Wii]], and all of my older consoles). | ||
<br>-My [[Chris and his | <br>-My [[Chris and his Ego|creative genius]]. | ||
<br>-My good [[Chris and health|health]]. | <br>-My good [[Chris and health|health]]. | ||
<br>(Not sure about the final two) | <br>(Not sure about the final two) | ||
'''I spend a lot of time thinking about''' | |||
How and where to socialize better. | How and where to socialize better. | ||
'''On a typical Friday night I am''' | |||
At home playing my "Sonichu's Adventures" on [[LittleBiGPlanet]], or [[Guitar Hero]] or the current video game I'm playing. | |||
At home playing my "[[Sonichu]]'s Adventures" on [[LittleBiGPlanet]], or [[Guitar Hero]] or the current video game I'm playing. | |||
'''The most private thing I’m willing to admit''' | |||
- | |||
'''Now in Spanish''' | '''Now in [[Spanish]]''' | ||
Yo soy [[Autism|autÃstico altamente funcionales]], y estoy un [[Virgin|virgen]] esperando por mi novia bonita. | Yo soy [[Autism|autÃstico altamente funcionales]], y estoy un [[Virgin with rage|virgen]] esperando por mi novia bonita. | ||
'' | ''English translation: I am an Autistic functioning at a high level, and I am a virgin searching for my pretty girlfriend.'' | ||
'''You should message me if''' | |||
You're A) 21-28 years old, B) not black (no personal offense), C) NOT a Smoker, D) Honest, Compassionate and Pretty, E) no taller than 5'10" and F) (the old expression) Boyfriend-Free. | You're A) 21-28 years old, B) not black (no personal offense), C) NOT a Smoker, D) Honest, Compassionate and Pretty, E) no taller than 5'10" and F) (the old expression) Boyfriend-Free. | ||
}} | |||
Over the course of several edits, Chris's profile eventually | |||
===Second version=== | |||
Over the course of several edits, Chris's profile eventually a distinct second form. All references to childish things, such as [[LittleBigPlanet]] and [[Sonichu]] had been removed, and replaced with things Chris thought of as "manly" like [[Guitar Hero]]. The sheer importance that women meet him "[[Rape|in person]]" became more and more emphasized with every edit, as well as constant references to how much he needs sex as soon as humanly possible. The legendary [[Third Date]] is completely foregone in favor of Chris getting precious [[China]] on his very first encounter with a woman, and requirements were added demanding that in-person contact must be had no later than two days after the first online contact. Despite his attempts to avoid embarrassing himself with his profile, Chris still misspelled the name of his alma mater, referring to it as "Piedmong Valley Community College". | |||
{{collapsible|Profile text of the second version| | |||
'''My Self-Summary''' | |||
I'm young at heart. I have a comic book series. I would enjoy the company of a beautiful woman who likes some of the things I do. I also like to have fun when I am able to, and do acts of kindness when possible. | I'm young at heart. I have a comic book series. I would enjoy the company of a beautiful woman who likes some of the things I do. I also like to have fun when I am able to, and do acts of kindness when possible. | ||
Line 112: | Line 124: | ||
Yo estoy buscando por una mujer honesta y va a amor mi por mi; una mujer con una personalidad feliz y positiva, joven en su corizon, bonita, tenga 21-28 anos, resida en, o cerca de, Charlottesville o Ruckersvlle, VA, Sin Fumar, no es negra y soltero. | Yo estoy buscando por una mujer honesta y va a amor mi por mi; una mujer con una personalidad feliz y positiva, joven en su corizon, bonita, tenga 21-28 anos, resida en, o cerca de, Charlottesville o Ruckersvlle, VA, Sin Fumar, no es negra y soltero. | ||
'''What I’m doing with my life''' | |||
I'm keeping it real; taking it one day at a time working on my projects and helping my family. I also work on my [[Sonichu (comic)|art projects]], get some [[Guitar Hero|exercise]] in; all that good stuff. | I'm keeping it real; taking it one day at a time working on my projects and helping my family. I also work on my [[Sonichu (comic)|art projects]], get some [[Guitar Hero|exercise]] in; all that good stuff. | ||
'''I’m really good at''' | |||
[[Chris and art|Drawing]], [[Chris and writing|writing]], crafting, making well-thought decisions, [[Father Call|heavy lifting]], holding a [[mumble|conversation]], showing a woman a good time (on a date with taking her to a restaurant and/or finding a fun event to check out and share). | |||
[[Chris and art|Drawing]], [[Chris and writing|writing]], crafting, [[Stardate,_August_27,_2010|making well-thought decisions]], [[Father Call|heavy lifting]], holding a [[mumble|conversation]], showing a woman a good time (on a date with taking her to a restaurant and/or finding a fun event to check out and share). | |||
'''The first things people usually notice about me''' | |||
I would have to give it to my [[The Creepy Stare|face]], especially in in-person times. When I look at other people, I notice their faces first most often. Aside from that, they notice my being friendly, kind and [[Speech impediment|easy to converse with]]. | I would have to give it to my [[The Creepy Stare|face]], especially in in-person times. When I look at other people, I notice their faces first most often. Aside from that, they notice my being friendly, kind and [[Speech impediment|easy to converse with]]. | ||
'''My favorite books, movies, music, and food''' | |||
Goosebumps or Fear Street Novels from R.L. Stein; "[[Mary Poppins]]" is my favorite movie of all time; I like most kinds of music (but my favorite singer is [[Britney Spears]]); Mac & Cheese, [[McDonalds|Grilled Chicken]]. | Goosebumps or Fear Street Novels from R.L. Stein; "[[Mary Poppins]]" is my favorite movie of all time; I like most kinds of music (but my favorite singer is [[Britney Spears]]); Mac & Cheese, [[McDonalds|Grilled Chicken]]. | ||
'''The six things I could never do without''' | |||
*(After I've found the one) My Girlfriend/[[Sweetheart]]. | |||
*Sex | |||
*My Video Games ([[PS3]], [[PSP]], DS and Wii, and [[List of Chris's games|all of my older consoles]]). | |||
*Sex | |||
*My [[Chris and his ego|creative genius]]. | |||
*[[Random Access Humor|Sex LOL]] | |||
*My good health. | |||
*My [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]]; I'm nearsighted. | |||
'' | '''I spend a lot of time thinking about''' | ||
How and where to socialize better. | How and where to socialize better. | ||
'''On a typical Friday night I am''' | |||
At home playing [[Guitar Hero]] or working on my current project. | At home playing [[Guitar Hero]] or working on my current project. | ||
I am Very Interested in livening up my Friday and Saturday Nights; I am open for suggestions. ;) | I am Very Interested in livening up my Friday and Saturday Nights; I am open for suggestions. ;) | ||
'''The most private thing I’m willing to admit''' | |||
I am very interested in sex as well as ALL of the True Love emotions, loyalty and honesty that go along with it. I am Compassionate And Passionate. | I am very interested in sex as well as ALL of the True Love emotions, loyalty and honesty that go along with it. I am Compassionate And Passionate. | ||
'''You should message me if''' | |||
You can MEET ME IN PERSON within TWO days of First Communication and that you are able to CALL ME and Accept CALLS FROM ME. As Well As If You are A) 21-28 years old, B) not [[Niggo|black]] ([[Chris and race|no personal offense]]), C) NOT a [[Tobacky|Smoker]], D) Honest, Compassionate and Pretty, E) no taller than 5'10" F) Single, G) Reside in or around Charlottesville or Ruckersville, VA and H) You'd Like to Get To Know Me Better In Person, share a pleasant conversation, etc. And if you are cool with getting to the bedroom as quickly as right after the First Date. | You can MEET ME IN PERSON within TWO days of First Communication and that you are able to CALL ME and Accept CALLS FROM ME. As Well As If You are A) 21-28 years old, B) not [[Niggo|black]] ([[Chris and race|no personal offense]]), C) NOT a [[Tobacky|Smoker]], D) Honest, Compassionate and Pretty, E) no taller than 5'10" F) Single, G) Reside in or around Charlottesville or Ruckersville, VA and H) You'd Like to Get To Know Me Better In Person, share a pleasant conversation, etc. And if you are cool with getting to the bedroom as quickly as right after the First Date. | ||
| | }} | ||
===Third version=== | |||
[[File:Dat-thinning.jpeg|thumb|Evidence of Chris' marked decline in health.]] | |||
The only interim change between the first and final versions of this page is Chris's most private thing, where he briefly stated in English that he was an autistic virgin. | The only interim change between the first and final versions of this page is Chris's most private thing, where he briefly stated in English that he was an autistic virgin. | ||
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{{-}} | {{-}} | ||
On or around June 12, Chris revisited his OKCupid entry and updated it briefly. Beyond an extra line, Chris added in a new section to the list. [[Chris and | On or around June 12, Chris revisited his OKCupid entry and updated it briefly. Beyond an extra line, Chris added in a new section to the list. Prior to doing this, he had claimed he was [[Chris and Hypocrisy|leaving the internet]]. | ||
{{collapsible|Profile text of the third version| | |||
'''My Self-Summary''' | |||
I'm young at heart. I have a comic book series. I would enjoy the company of a beautiful woman who likes some of the things I do. I also like to have fun when I am able to, and do acts of kindness when possible. | I'm young at heart. I have a comic book series. I would enjoy the company of a beautiful woman who likes some of the things I do. I also like to have fun when I am able to, and do acts of kindness when possible. | ||
Line 180: | Line 201: | ||
I am compassionate, reliable, and honest | I am compassionate, reliable, and honest | ||
'''What I’m doing with my life''' | |||
I'm keeping it real; taking it one day at a time working on my projects and helping my family. I also work on my [[Sonichu (comic)|art projects]], get some [[Guitar Hero|exercise]] in; all that good stuff. | I'm keeping it real; taking it one day at a time working on my projects and helping my family. I also work on my [[Sonichu (comic)|art projects]], get some [[Guitar Hero|exercise]] in; all that good stuff. | ||
'''I’m really good at''' | |||
[[Chris and art|Drawing]], [[Chris and writing|writing]], crafting, making well-thought decisions, [[Father Call|heavy lifting]], holding a [[mumble|conversation]], showing a woman a good time (on a date with taking her to a restaurant and/or finding a fun event to check out and share). | [[Chris and art|Drawing]], [[Chris and writing|writing]], crafting, making well-thought decisions, [[Father Call|heavy lifting]], holding a [[mumble|conversation]], showing a woman a good time (on a date with taking her to a restaurant and/or finding a fun event to check out and share). | ||
'''The first things people usually notice about me''' | |||
I would have to give it to my [[The Creepy Stare|face]], especially in in-person times. When I look at other people, I notice their faces first most often. Aside from that, they notice my being friendly, kind and easy to converse with. | I would have to give it to my [[The Creepy Stare|face]], especially in in-person times. When I look at other people, I notice their faces first most often. Aside from that, they notice my being friendly, kind and easy to converse with. | ||
'''My favorite books, movies, music, and food''' | |||
Goosebumps or Fear Street Novels from R.L. Stein; "[[Mary Poppins]]" is my favorite movie of all time; I like most kinds of music (but my favorite singer is [[Britney Spears]]); Mac & Cheese, [[McDonalds|Grilled Chicken]]. | Goosebumps or Fear Street Novels from R.L. Stein; "[[Mary Poppins]]" is my favorite movie of all time; I like most kinds of music (but my favorite singer is [[Britney Spears]]); Mac & Cheese, [[McDonalds|Grilled Chicken]]. | ||
'''The six things I could never do without''' | |||
*(After I've found the one) My Girlfriend/[[Sweetheart]]. | |||
*My Video Games ([[PS3]], [[PSP]], DS and Wii, and [[List of Chris's games|all of my older consoles]]). | |||
*My [[Chris and his ego|creative genius]]. | |||
*My [[Health|good health]]. | |||
*My [[Pedo-Glasses|glasses]]; I'm nearsighted. | |||
*[[McDonalds|Food]]/[[Coca-Cola|Water]] | |||
'''I spend a lot of time thinking about''' | |||
How and where to socialize better. | How and where to socialize better. | ||
'''On a typical Friday night I am''' | |||
At home playing [[Guitar Hero]] or working on my current project. | At home playing [[Guitar Hero]] or working on my current project. | ||
I am Very Interested in livening up my Friday and Saturday Nights; I am open for suggestions. ;) | I am Very Interested in livening up my Friday and Saturday Nights; I am open for suggestions. ;) | ||
'''The most private thing I’m willing to admit''' | |||
I am very interested in sex as well as ALL of the True Love emotions, loyalty and honesty that go along with it. I am Compassionate And Passionate. | I am very interested in sex as well as ALL of the True Love emotions, loyalty and honesty that go along with it. I am Compassionate And Passionate. | ||
'''I'm looking for''' | |||
*Girls who like guys | |||
*Ages 21-28 | |||
*Near me | |||
*Who are single | |||
*For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, activity partners, casual sex | |||
'''You should message me if''' | |||
You can MEET ME IN PERSON within TWO days of First Communication and that you are able to CALL ME and Accept CALLS FROM ME. As Well As If You are A) 21-28 years old, B) not [[Niggo|black]] ([[Chris and race|no personal offense]]), C) NOT a [[Tobacky|Smoker]], D) Honest, Compassionate and Pretty, E) no taller than 5'10" F) Single, G) Reside in or around Charlottesville or Ruckersville, VA and H) You'd Like to Get To Know Me Better In Person, share a pleasant conversation, etc. And if you are cool with getting to the bedroom as quickly as right after the First Date. | You can MEET ME IN PERSON within TWO days of First Communication and that you are able to CALL ME and Accept CALLS FROM ME. As Well As If You are A) 21-28 years old, B) not [[Niggo|black]] ([[Chris and race|no personal offense]]), C) NOT a [[Tobacky|Smoker]], D) Honest, Compassionate and Pretty, E) no taller than 5'10" F) Single, G) Reside in or around Charlottesville or Ruckersville, VA and H) You'd Like to Get To Know Me Better In Person, share a pleasant conversation, etc. And if you are cool with getting to the bedroom as quickly as right after the First Date. | ||
|} | }} | ||
===Fourth version=== | |||
As of February 2013, Chris's profile had been updated once again. The final version of this profile featured new references to [[tomgirl]]ism and a considerable de-emphasis on the importance of quick sex. Particularly notable about this update was the addition of a new photo, showing Chris to have a [[Chris and health|sickly blue complexion]], thinning and receding uncut [[hair]], and worsening [[obesity]]. This apparent decline in health is hardly surprising, considering Chris' sedentary lifestyle and gratuitous consumption of [[McDonald's]]. | |||
Also of note is Chris' insistence that all potential dates "IGNORE ALL GOOGLE RESULTS", a mantra he has repeated on his [[Facebook]] profile and even in personal correspondence, referring people who wish to know more about him to the [[CWCki]] while simultaneously instructing them to "IGNORE ALL DEROGATORY CONTENT". Obviously, Chris had failed to realize the paradoxical effect of preemptively instructing people to ignore anything bad they may read about him, only serving to further interest in his autistic antics. Also, in this version of the profile, Chris removes all of the existing Spanish text, perhaps having realized his [[Attraction Sign|list of demands]] to which his heartsweet must conform precludes Hispanic women. | |||
{{collapsible|Profile text of the fourth version| | |||
'''My self-summary''' | |||
I am an all-around, [[Toys|emotionally mature]], good natured, high-functioning [[Autism|autistic]], heterosexual [[tomgirl]] artist. I feel better being treated as a person than some sort of freak or something. I am a good listener, and sometimes I have to take my time thinking about a topic or issue. I am the Original Creator of [[Sonichu]], [[Rosechu]], and the city of [[Cwcville]], VA. ([[Chris and reality|IGNORE ALL GOOGLE RESULTS]]) | |||
I like making those close to me emotionally happy. Even though, I have been feeling seriously depressed, lonely and having constant [[Stress|heartaches]]. | |||
I am looking for a woman to be my friend/Sweetheart/[[Sweetheart from the ground up|Future Wife from the ground up]]. She should be true and honest in personality, all-around, compassionate, understanding and patient. | |||
ALL Women interested in me MUST be willing to meet in person/in real life IMMEDIATELY; I have had [[Julie|bad]] [[Ivy|online]] [[Jackie|experiences]] numerously from a lot of [[Trolls|fake people]]. Finding me in Person at my hangout is the best bet; I usually am Very cautious about any and all messages I receive online and I screen my phone calls. AND getting my attention must be direct with a pleasant greeting and introduction. | |||
Please forgive me if I respond coldly or timidly at first, I am very shy, and I am paranoid of most people and the kind of bad person they may be. | |||
'''What I'm doing with my life''' | |||
I'm keeping it real; taking it one day at a time working on my [[Sonichu (comic)|projects]] and helping my family. I also work on my art projects, get some exercise in; all that good stuff. | |||
'''I’m really good at''' | |||
Drawing, writing, crafting, [[28 October 2011|making well-thought decisions]], heavy lifting, holding a conversation, showing a woman a good time (on a date with taking her to a restaurant and/or finding a fun event to check out and share). | |||
'''The first things people usually notice about me''' | |||
I would have to give it to my face, especially in in-person times. When I look at other people, I notice their faces first most often. Aside from that, they notice my being friendly, kind and easy to converse with. | |||
'''Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food''' | |||
[[Goosebumps]] or Fear Street Novels from R.L. Stein; "Mary Poppins" is my favorite movie of all time; I like most kinds of music (but my favorite singer is Britney Spears); Mac & Cheese, Grilled Chicken. | |||
'''The six things I could never do without''' | |||
*(After I've found the one) My Girlfriend/Sweetheart. | |||
*My iPhone. | |||
*My creative genius. | |||
*My good health. | |||
*My glasses. | |||
*Food/Water. | |||
'''I spend a lot of time thinking about''' | |||
[[Attraction Sign|How]] and [[Fridays After Five|where]] to socialize better. | |||
'''On a typical Friday night I am''' | |||
I am Very Interested in pleasantly livening up my Friday and Saturday Nights. ;) | |||
'''The most private thing I’m willing to admit''' | |||
I am very interested in sex as well as ALL of the True Love emotions, loyalty and honesty that go along with it. I am [[CWC Update!!!!! 27 March 2009|Compassionate]] And Passionate. | |||
'''I’m looking for''' | |||
*Straight girls only | |||
*Ages 25–30 | |||
*Near me | |||
*Who are single | |||
*For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, activity partners, casual sex | |||
'''You should message me if''' | |||
You can MEET ME IN PERSON Right Now; Online Communications are OUT. As Well As If You are A) 25-30 years old, B) not [[Niggos|black]] (no personal offense), C) NOT a [[Tobacky|Smoker]], D) [[Honest Content|Honest]], Compassionate and Pretty, E) no taller than 5'10" F) Single, G) Reside in or around Charlottesville or Ruckersville, VA, H) financially stable ([[Monthly tugboat|I get along fair and surviving]]), and You'd Like to Get To Know Me Better In Person, share a pleasant conversation, etc. | |||
}} | |||
{{clear}} | |||
==LevelUpKing profile== | |||
[[File:LevelUpKing okcupid profile screenshot 8 jul 2014.jpg|thumb|Screencap of the profile.]] | |||
In July 2014, a [[CWCki Forums]] member found yet another OkCupid profile that Chris created.<ref>https://kiwifarms.net/threads/updated-okc-profile.4193/ (archive: https://archive.ph/rLTq9)</ref> A [[July 25, 2014 Leaks|chat with an anonymous friend]] indicates that it had been set up by a [[gal pal]] by 28 June, and that Chris was so shy and incompetent that he depended on other friends to find and screen potential dates. He asked one male acquaintance to actually begin "flirty" conversations with them. | |||
In this iteration of the profile, Chris at first comes off markedly saner than last time, having opted to substitute horrifying [[Honest Content]] with embellishments and outright lies about himself, such as claiming he enjoys recreational walking. However, despite the façade of the profile being less terrifying than in previous iterations, Chris's usual brand of aggressive insanity can be found if one scratches the surface. | |||
For instance, in this edition of the profile he makes no mention whatsoever of neither his habit of crossdressing nor his motivation for doing it (hinting at it through his "fashion", as if that were in any way indicative). This, at first, presents a saner picture than before, but a quick foray into the horrifying "Photos" section reveals his tomgirlish ways [[Tomgirl Pictures|ad nauseam]], something for which his "heterosexual male" profile provides no explanation whatsoever. This makes him look like a complete lunatic. | |||
The profile consists of many other embellishments and lies--Chris claiming that he is good at "anything art related", has a huge imagination, cares deeply for his family, etc. He implies he is the head of his household, claiming to be "looking after" Barb and the pets, the [[tugboat|reasoning]] for which is conspicuously absent. One thing which has carried over from previous profiles is his demand that women verify their identity to him, Chris proclaiming that an "immediate" real-life meeting with him is "Mandetory". | |||
There are other notable omissions - partial and total - besides Chris's tomgirlism. Chris's mentions of [[Legos]] is fairly sparse considering that when he wrote the profile he was slavishly addicted to them and spending literal thousands of dollars on sets (although unbeknownst to Chris, a 32-year-old man mentioning Legos at all would be fairly damning). Chris makes no mention whatsoever of his current [[Rental House|living situation]]. As in the fourth version of his previous profile, Chris does not attempt any Spanish in this edition, although he still claims dubiously to be "okay" at it (as well as [[Chris and English|"fluent" in English]]). His [[Attraction Sign|obligatory list of things his partner must be or have]] is partially omitted; it is truncated in his main profile in this version, but it can be pieced together in all its glory by perusing the [[List of OkCupid Answers|1,333 personality questions]] he answered. | |||
OkCupid generates a chart based on a user's answer to personality questions, in order to compare them to other users on the site. Chris was determined to be "more morally conventional", "[[Chris and religion|more spiritual]]", "[[Chris and art|more artsy]]", "more sloppy", "worse mannered", "[[Chris and sex|less sex driven]]", "[[Barbara Chandler|less independent]]", "[[Chris and remorse|less compassionate]]", "[[Love Quest|less experienced in love]]", "[[Chris and his Ego|less arrogant]]", "[[Chris and reality|less scientific]]", and "less experienced in life" than the average OkCupid user. | |||
The profile was mostly unused by September, for [[trolls|mysterious reasons]]. By this time, however, the account had already netted him [[Catherine]], so he wasn't too concerned. | |||
[[File:TrollsonOKCupid2014.png|thumb|Why Chris stopped using the account.]] | |||
{{collapsible|Profile text| | |||
'''My self-summary''' | |||
I'm an empathetic artistic individual with honest emotions. I'm [[List of Chris's lies|genuine]] about how I feel and [[Chris and hypocrisy|I stick to my beliefs]]. I care about those closest to me, especially [[Cole Smithey|my family]]. I have a [[Things Chris has ripped off|big imagination]] and love using it towards my creations. I graduated from PVCC with an associates in Computer Aided Drafting. I try to think outside the box. My sense of [[Chris and fashion|fashion]] matches my personality and how I emotionally feel. Sometimes I'm [[slow-in-the-minds|a little scatterbrained]], so please don't mind me if I jump topics. :) | |||
My hobbies/interests include creating, drawing/coloring, creating with Lego, video games, walking, music, and shopping. | |||
'''What I’m doing with my life''' | |||
Taking care of my mother and pets. | |||
'''I’m really good at''' | |||
Anything art related. I'm also pretty good at video games. | |||
'''The first things people usually notice about me''' | |||
[[Tomgirl Pictures|My fashion. ;)]] | |||
'''Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food''' | |||
Movies: tied for #1, Mary Poppins and My Little Pony - Equeatria Girls. #2: The Lego Movie. #3: Yellow Submarine. Meet Me In St. Louis, Singin' in the Rain, On the Town, and other musicals. | |||
TV Shows: My Little Pony (all generations), Sonic the Hedgehog, Transformers, Fraiser, Keeping Up Appearances, Daria, Sailor Moon and other anime. | |||
Music: I like most types of music, including Pop, Jazz, Rock and Classic. Artists: Britney Spears, Katy Perry, the Beatles and others. | |||
'''The six things I could never do without''' | |||
No particular order. My iPhone, Lego collection and creations, video games, my family of mother, 2 beagles and cat, my artworks, my future sweetheart and children (still yet to be determined). | |||
'''I spend a lot of time thinking about''' | |||
How I can improve my life and future. | |||
'''On a typical Friday night I am''' | |||
At home, minding my small family, piddling with my Legos, watching a flick, playing a video game or whatever. And definitely Feeling lonely for an eligible woman to be my Sweetheart, closest friend and Future Wife. | |||
'''[[DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS|The most private thing I’m willing to admit]]''' | |||
I have been emotionally hurt a lot before, and I am reasonably paranoid of others, especially online. Which is WHY it is Mandetory for immediate in person meeting with me. | |||
'''I’m looking for''' | |||
*Girls who like guys | |||
*Ages 23–32 | |||
*Near me | |||
*Who are [[Boyfriend-free girl|single]] | |||
*For [[gal pal|new friends]], long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex | |||
'''You should message me if''' | |||
YOU Make the First Move and Ask ME Out, Please. | |||
And if you are single, caring, compassionate, confident, honest, smoke-free, and you MUST be willing to Meet In Person IMMEDIATELY or ASAP. :) | |||
'''My Details''' | |||
Orientation: [[Homos|Straight]] | |||
Ethnicity: [[Cherokian Clan|Native American]], [[Chris and race|White]] | |||
Height: 5'10"(1.78m) | |||
Body type: [[obesity|Average]] | |||
Diet: [[McDonald's|Mostly anything]] | |||
Smokes: No | |||
Drinks: Socially | |||
Drugs: Never | |||
Religion: [[Chris and religion|Christianity]], and somewhat serious about it | |||
Sign: Pisces, and it's fun to think about | |||
Education: Ggraduated from two-year college | |||
Job: Other | |||
Income: [[monthly tugboat|-]] | |||
Relationship status: Single | |||
Relationship type: [[Vanessa Hudgens|Strictly monogamous]] | |||
Offspring: [[Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)|Doesn't have kids, but wants them]] | |||
Pets: Has dogs and has cats | |||
Speaks: [[Chris and English|English]] (Fluently), [[Spanish]] (Okay) | |||
}} | |||
===Photos=== | |||
<center><gallery> | |||
File:Okcupid 8 jul 2014 1.jpg | A (comparatively) flattering photo showing his ponytail and smug expression. | |||
File:Okcupid 8 jul 2014 2.jpg | Though his [[fashion]] choices have become Tomgirl-themed, Chris still clashes primary colours and looks like a clown. | |||
File:Okcupid 8 jul 2014 3.jpg | The rapidly-balding artist in profile. | |||
File:Okcupid 8 jul 2014 4.jpg | A frightening photo where Chris looks like [[Barb]] when she was obese. Featuring the newest form of the [[Attraction Sign]]. | |||
File:Okcupid 8 jul 2014 5.jpg | Oh dear. | |||
File:Okcupid 8 jul 2014 6.jpg | Presumably candid; Chris appears to be [[Michael Snyder|paranoid]] about something. | |||
File:LevelUpKing okcupid personality screenshot 8 jul 2014.jpg | A graph of sorts which shows information about a user's personality. | |||
</gallery></center> | |||
==LevelUpQueen profile== | |||
[[File:Chris enema.jpg|thumb|A new photo added to those above. Look at the foreground.]] | |||
As Chris's "relationship" with [[Catherine]] came to an end, he renewed his online [[Love Quest]] in [[December 2014]] with a new profile which included changes to reflect his new gender identity. With his name changed to "LevelUpQueen" (which required a fee to OkCupid), he declared himself both a "Lesbian Transwoman" and a "man looking for women". Further muddying the waters, he claimed that he would "work best" for straight, bi, and lesbian women. He stressed he wanted an "open relationship" and was interested in a "menage a trois". He also seemed to have a more open attitude towards friendship; instead of looking for "girls who like guys", he was now looking for "everybody", and he also stated dubiously that he would be interested in meeting married women for "friendship". Other than these new features, the profile was very similar to the LevelUpKing incarnation. | |||
{{collapsible|Profile text| | |||
'''My Self-Summary''' | |||
<nowiki>**Looking to be in an open relationship**</nowiki> | |||
I'm an empathetic artistic individual with honest emotions. I'm genuine about how I feel and I stick to my beliefs. I care about those closest to me, especially my family. I have a big imagination and love using it towards my creations. I graduated from PVCC with an associates in Computer Aided Drafting. I try to think outside the box. My sense of fashion matches my personality and how I emotionally feel. Sometimes I'm a little scatterbrained, so please don't mind me if I jump topics. :) | |||
My hobbies/interests include creating, drawing/coloring, creating with Lego, video games, walking, music, and shopping. | |||
I am also a Female, Lesbian Soul in this Male Body; a Lesbian Transwoman (Very Interested in Women) (no operation). I would work best for any woman, her being straight, Bi or Lesbian. | |||
I am a very proud LGBTQ Rights supporter, and would be an activist if the event is local. I also like to attend local Pride Festivals and such events. | |||
'''I’m looking for''' | |||
Everybody | |||
Ages 23–32 | |||
Near me | |||
For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex | |||
'''What I’m doing with my life''' | |||
Taking care of my mother and pets. | |||
'''I’m really good at''' | |||
Anything art related. I'm also pretty good at video games. | |||
'''The first things people usually notice about me''' | |||
My fashion. ;) | |||
'''Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food''' | |||
Movies: tied for #1, Mary Poppins and My Little Pony - Equeatria Girls. #2: The Lego Movie. #3: Yellow Submarine. Meet Me In St. Louis, Singin' in the Rain, On the Town, and other musicals. | |||
TV Shows: My Little Pony (all generations), Sonic the Hedgehog, Transformers, Fraiser, Keeping Up Appearances, Daria, Sailor Moon and other anime. | |||
Music: I like most types of music, including Pop, Jazz, Rock and Classic. Artists: Britney Spears, Katy Perry, the Beatles and others. | |||
'''The six things I could never do without''' | |||
No particular order. My iPhone, Lego collection and creations, video games, my family of mother, 2 beagles and cat, my artworks, my future sweetheart and children (still yet to be determined). | |||
'''I spend a lot of time thinking about''' | |||
How I can improve my life and future. | |||
'''On a typical Friday night I am''' | |||
At home, minding my small family, piddling with my Legos, watching a flick, playing a video game or whatever. And definitely Feeling lonely for an eligible woman to be my Sweetheart, closest friend and Future Wife. | |||
'''The most private thing I’m willing to admit''' | |||
I have been emotionally hurt a lot before, and I am reasonably paranoid of others, especially online. Which is WHY it is Mandetory for it to be immediate in person, meeting with me. | |||
'''You should message me if''' | |||
YOU Make the First Move and Ask ME Out, Please. | |||
And if you are truly caring, compassionate and understanding, confident, honest, smoke-free, and you MUST be willing to Meet In Person IMMEDIATELY (most preferably) or ASAP. | |||
Also, if you are a married woman, I would consider meeting for pleasant, casual conversations and whatnot. | |||
And I would be involved in a menage a trois only consisting of two women. | |||
'''My Details''' | |||
Orientation: Straight | |||
Ethnicity: Native American, White | |||
Height: 5′ 10″ (1.78m) | |||
Body Type: Average | |||
Diet: Mostly anything | |||
Smokes: No | |||
Drinks: Socially | |||
Drugs: Never | |||
Religion: Christianity, and somewhat serious about it | |||
Sign: Pisces, and it’s fun to think about | |||
Education: Graduated from two-year college | |||
Job: Other | |||
Income: - | |||
Relationship Status: Single | |||
Relationship Type: Non-monogamous | |||
Offspring: Doesn’t have kids, but wants them | |||
Pets: Has dogs and has cats | |||
Speaks: English (Fluently), Spanish (Okay) | |||
}} | |||
==See also== | ==See also== | ||
*[[List of OkCupid Answers]] | *[[List of OkCupid Answers]] | ||
*[[The Hook Cafe]] | *[[The Hook Cafe|''The HooK'' Café]] | ||
*[[Match.com]] | *[[Match.com]] | ||
==References== | |||
<references/> | |||
==External links== | ==External links== | ||
*[http://www.okcupid.com/profile/CWCSONICHU Chris's first OkCupid profile] | *[https://web.archive.org/web/20090811174147/http://www.okcupid.com/profile/CWCSONICHU Chris's first OkCupid profile] | ||
*[http://www.okcupid.com/profile/ChrisCSonichu Chris's second OkCupid profile] | *[https://web.archive.org/web/20140726143539/http://www.okcupid.com/profile/ChrisCSonichu Chris's second OkCupid profile] | ||
*[http://www.okcupid.com/profile/LevelUpKing Chris's third OkCupid profile] [https://archive.is/pVsZ7 Archive] | |||
*[http://www.okcupid.com/profile/LevelUpQueen Chris's fourth OkCupid profile] | |||
{{The Internet}} | {{The Internet}} | ||
{{articleofthenow}} | |||
[[Category:Love Quest]] | |||
[[Category:Websites]] | [[Category:Websites]] |
Latest revision as of 09:33, 15 April 2023
OkCupid, one of the more popular dating websites, matches people based on how they respond to questions that they may answer at their leisure. Unlike sites such as Match.com, OkCupid allows users to message and search each other for free, only charging for perks like ad removal and unlimited inbox space. Like so many other dating websites before, Christian Weston Chandler joined this one with high hopes, and has renewed his profile many times, despite never successfully attracting anybody through it.
CWCSONICHU profile
Chris created his first OkCupid profile in late February 2009. He gave up on it quickly, and he never answered any of the questions or quizzes that the site uses to build a personality profile of each user. It's likely he quit using it after girls failed to flood his inbox with offers of True and Honest love. In the usual Chris style, the profile is woefully incomplete, featuring only a very brief personal summary, and a looking-for box in which he checked every available option, including "casual sex".
While mildly entertaining, this profile didn't last long; after a short time it was hacked by trolls. Fortunately, Chris would make more profiles in the future.
Profile text |
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I am Autistic, Fun, and Creative.
My Self-Summary I'm young at heart. I'm currently writing a comic book, and I've written quite a few issues so far. I am a bit shy, but I would enjoy the company of a beautiful girl who likes some of the things I do. I also like to have fun when I can, and I don't really like to be alone. I graduated from high school on the Honor Roll, and I am doing very well at PVCC. A lot of men make false promises to their girlfriends, but I am totally different. When it comes to what I can offer, I can seriously promise care, respect, empathy, and love. I think that (most) girls deserve the world, and I would do my best to give it to them. I haven't had the best of luck with girlfriends in my past. There was a lot of lying and backstabbing done to me, and I'm looking for someone who is honest and will love me for me. Who I'd like to meet: Someone with a happy, positive personality, young at heart, very pretty, 18-23-years old, lives in, or around, the Charlottesville or Ruckersville (both in the state of Virginia) areas, smoke-free, non-alcholoic, white and does not already have a Boyfriend. My Details Looking for: New friends, Long-term dating, Short-term dating, Activity partners, Long-distance penpals, Casual sex |
OKCupid has a variety of other fields such as religion, height, and race, all of which Chris left blank.
ChrisCSonichu profile
Chris's return to OkCupid started on 4 April 2009 under the name "ChrisCSonichu". This was a much more involved affair than his earlier profile, as Chris updated this profile frequently. These updates slowly changed the page from a badly written but largely benign profile into a violently insane, sex-obsessed manifesto about how awesome Chris is, and how hot girls should be having sex with him. This slow evolution from stupid and relatively innocent to stupid, filthy and deranged can be found in virtually every chronological thing Chris has ever made or done, but is perhaps most evident in his Sonichu comics.
In the subsections below, editor's notes and translations are marked in Italics.
First version
The earliest saved version we have of Chris's page is relatively harmless. Chris makes an ass of himself in two languages, and refers to himself as a creative genius, but on the whole there's nothing too outlandish. Unfortunately, this simple, placid version of the profile was the calm before the storm.
Profile text of the first version |
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My Self-Summary I'm young at heart. I have a comic book series. I would enjoy the company of a beautiful woman who likes some of the things I do. I also like to have fun when I am able to, and do acts of kindness when possible. I graduated from high school on the Honor Roll, and I have graduated from Piedmong Virginia Community College with a Degree and a Certificate in Computer Aided Drafting and Design. When it comes to what I can offer, I can seriously promise care, respect, empathy, and love. I think that (most) women deserve the world, and I would do my best to give it to them. I am looking for a woman who is honest and will love me for me; a woman with a happy, positive personality, young at heart, pretty, 21-28-years old, lives in, or around, the Charlottesville or Ruckersville (both in the state of Virginia) areas, smoke-free, non-black and single. Now in Spanish Yo soy joven en mi corizon. Yo tengo un serie de libros comicos. Me gusta la compaña de una mujer bonita quién la gusta mas o menos de las cosas me gusta. Me gusta tener diversion cuando posible, y hago hechos de benevolencia cuando posible. Yo gradue de me escuela secundarie con Honor Roll, y gradue desde Piedmont Virginia Community College con un tÃtulo y certificado en Computer Aided Drafting & Design. Yo prometo cuidar, respetar, empatÃa y amor. Yo penso que (muchas) mujers ameriten el mundo, ye yo querÃa hacer mi mejor para dar lo por ellas. Yo estoy buscando por una mujer honesta y va a amor mi por mi; una mujer con una personalidad feliz y positiva, joven en su corizon, bonita, tenga 21-28 anos, resida en, o cerca de, Charlottesville o Ruckersvlle, VA, Sin Fumar, no es negra y soltero. What I’m doing with my life I'm keeping it real; taking it one day at a time working on my projects and helping my family. I’m really good at Drawing, writing, crafting, making well-thought decisions, heavy lifting and other things. The first things people usually notice about me I would have to give it to my face, especially in in-person times. When I look at other people, I notice their faces first most often. My favorite books, movies, music, and food Goosebumps or Fear Street Novels from R.L. Stein; "Mary Poppins" is my favorite movie of all time; I like most kinds of music (but my favorite singer is Britney Spears); Mac & Cheese, Grilled Chicken. The six things I could never do without -(After I've found the one) My Girlfriend/Sweetheart.
I spend a lot of time thinking about How and where to socialize better. On a typical Friday night I am At home playing my "Sonichu's Adventures" on LittleBiGPlanet, or Guitar Hero or the current video game I'm playing. The most private thing I’m willing to admit - Now in Spanish Yo soy autÃstico altamente funcionales, y estoy un virgen esperando por mi novia bonita. English translation: I am an Autistic functioning at a high level, and I am a virgin searching for my pretty girlfriend. You should message me if You're A) 21-28 years old, B) not black (no personal offense), C) NOT a Smoker, D) Honest, Compassionate and Pretty, E) no taller than 5'10" and F) (the old expression) Boyfriend-Free. |
Second version
Over the course of several edits, Chris's profile eventually a distinct second form. All references to childish things, such as LittleBigPlanet and Sonichu had been removed, and replaced with things Chris thought of as "manly" like Guitar Hero. The sheer importance that women meet him "in person" became more and more emphasized with every edit, as well as constant references to how much he needs sex as soon as humanly possible. The legendary Third Date is completely foregone in favor of Chris getting precious China on his very first encounter with a woman, and requirements were added demanding that in-person contact must be had no later than two days after the first online contact. Despite his attempts to avoid embarrassing himself with his profile, Chris still misspelled the name of his alma mater, referring to it as "Piedmong Valley Community College".
Profile text of the second version |
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My Self-Summary I'm young at heart. I have a comic book series. I would enjoy the company of a beautiful woman who likes some of the things I do. I also like to have fun when I am able to, and do acts of kindness when possible. I graduated from high school on the Honor Roll, and I have graduated from Piedmong Virginia Community College with a Degree and a Certificate in Computer Aided Drafting and Design. When it comes to what I can offer, I can seriously promise care, respect, empathy, and love. I think that (most) women deserve the world, and I would do my best to give it to them. I am looking for a woman who is honest and will love me for me, and sex is an eventual must; a woman with a happy, positive personality, young at heart, pretty, 21-28-years old, lives in, or around, the Charlottesville or Ruckersville (both in the state of Virginia) areas, smoke-free, non-black and single. Now in Spanish Yo soy joven en mi corizon. Yo tengo un serie de libros comicos. Me gusta la compaña de una mujer bonita quién la gusta mas o menos de las cosas me gusta. Me gusta tener diversion cuando posible, y hago hechos de benevolencia cuando posible. Yo gradue de me escuela secundarie con Honor Roll, y gradue desde Piedmont Virginia Community College con un tÃtulo y certificado en Computer Aided Drafting & Design. Yo prometo cuidar, respetar, empatÃa y amor. Yo penso que (muchas) mujers ameriten el mundo, ye yo querÃa hacer mi mejor para dar lo por ellas. Yo estoy buscando por una mujer honesta y va a amor mi por mi; una mujer con una personalidad feliz y positiva, joven en su corizon, bonita, tenga 21-28 anos, resida en, o cerca de, Charlottesville o Ruckersvlle, VA, Sin Fumar, no es negra y soltero. What I’m doing with my life I'm keeping it real; taking it one day at a time working on my projects and helping my family. I also work on my art projects, get some exercise in; all that good stuff. I’m really good at Drawing, writing, crafting, making well-thought decisions, heavy lifting, holding a conversation, showing a woman a good time (on a date with taking her to a restaurant and/or finding a fun event to check out and share). The first things people usually notice about me I would have to give it to my face, especially in in-person times. When I look at other people, I notice their faces first most often. Aside from that, they notice my being friendly, kind and easy to converse with. My favorite books, movies, music, and food Goosebumps or Fear Street Novels from R.L. Stein; "Mary Poppins" is my favorite movie of all time; I like most kinds of music (but my favorite singer is Britney Spears); Mac & Cheese, Grilled Chicken. The six things I could never do without
I spend a lot of time thinking about How and where to socialize better. On a typical Friday night I am At home playing Guitar Hero or working on my current project. I am Very Interested in livening up my Friday and Saturday Nights; I am open for suggestions. ;) The most private thing I’m willing to admit I am very interested in sex as well as ALL of the True Love emotions, loyalty and honesty that go along with it. I am Compassionate And Passionate. You should message me if You can MEET ME IN PERSON within TWO days of First Communication and that you are able to CALL ME and Accept CALLS FROM ME. As Well As If You are A) 21-28 years old, B) not black (no personal offense), C) NOT a Smoker, D) Honest, Compassionate and Pretty, E) no taller than 5'10" F) Single, G) Reside in or around Charlottesville or Ruckersville, VA and H) You'd Like to Get To Know Me Better In Person, share a pleasant conversation, etc. And if you are cool with getting to the bedroom as quickly as right after the First Date. |
Third version
The only interim change between the first and final versions of this page is Chris's most private thing, where he briefly stated in English that he was an autistic virgin.
“ | I am high-functioning autistic, and I am a virgin; do not be afraid of me nor judge me. I've conquered most of my autistic traits (more of which can be learned on wikipedia or on autism.org) | ” |
Chris, before expunging it from the record entirely. |
On or around June 12, Chris revisited his OKCupid entry and updated it briefly. Beyond an extra line, Chris added in a new section to the list. Prior to doing this, he had claimed he was leaving the internet.
Profile text of the third version |
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My Self-Summary I'm young at heart. I have a comic book series. I would enjoy the company of a beautiful woman who likes some of the things I do. I also like to have fun when I am able to, and do acts of kindness when possible. I graduated from high school on the Honor Roll, and I have graduated from Piedmong Virginia Community College with a Degree and a Certificate in Computer Aided Drafting and Design. When it comes to what I can offer, I can seriously promise care, respect, empathy, and love. I think that (most) women deserve the world, and I would do my best to give it to them. I am looking for a woman who is honest and will love me for me, and sex is an eventual must; a woman with a happy, positive personality, young at heart, pretty, 21-28-years old, lives in, or around, the Charlottesville or Ruckersville (both in the state of Virginia) areas, smoke-free, non-black and single. Now in Spanish Yo soy joven en mi corizon. Yo tengo un serie de libros comicos. Me gusta la compaña de una mujer bonita quién la gusta mas o menos de las cosas me gusta. Me gusta tener diversion cuando posible, y hago hechos de benevolencia cuando posible. Yo gradue de me escuela secundarie con Honor Roll, y gradue desde Piedmont Virginia Community College con un tÃtulo y certificado en Computer Aided Drafting & Design. Yo prometo cuidar, respetar, empatÃa y amor. Yo penso que (muchas) mujers ameriten el mundo, ye yo querÃa hacer mi mejor para dar lo por ellas. Yo estoy buscando por una mujer honesta y va a amor mi por mi; una mujer con una personalidad feliz y positiva, joven en su corizon, bonita, tenga 21-28 anos, resida en, o cerca de, Charlottesville o Ruckersvlle, VA, Sin Fumar, no es negra y soltero. I am compassionate, reliable, and honest What I’m doing with my life I'm keeping it real; taking it one day at a time working on my projects and helping my family. I also work on my art projects, get some exercise in; all that good stuff. I’m really good at Drawing, writing, crafting, making well-thought decisions, heavy lifting, holding a conversation, showing a woman a good time (on a date with taking her to a restaurant and/or finding a fun event to check out and share). The first things people usually notice about me I would have to give it to my face, especially in in-person times. When I look at other people, I notice their faces first most often. Aside from that, they notice my being friendly, kind and easy to converse with. My favorite books, movies, music, and food Goosebumps or Fear Street Novels from R.L. Stein; "Mary Poppins" is my favorite movie of all time; I like most kinds of music (but my favorite singer is Britney Spears); Mac & Cheese, Grilled Chicken. The six things I could never do without
I spend a lot of time thinking about How and where to socialize better. On a typical Friday night I am At home playing Guitar Hero or working on my current project. I am Very Interested in livening up my Friday and Saturday Nights; I am open for suggestions. ;) The most private thing I’m willing to admit I am very interested in sex as well as ALL of the True Love emotions, loyalty and honesty that go along with it. I am Compassionate And Passionate. I'm looking for
You should message me if You can MEET ME IN PERSON within TWO days of First Communication and that you are able to CALL ME and Accept CALLS FROM ME. As Well As If You are A) 21-28 years old, B) not black (no personal offense), C) NOT a Smoker, D) Honest, Compassionate and Pretty, E) no taller than 5'10" F) Single, G) Reside in or around Charlottesville or Ruckersville, VA and H) You'd Like to Get To Know Me Better In Person, share a pleasant conversation, etc. And if you are cool with getting to the bedroom as quickly as right after the First Date. |
Fourth version
As of February 2013, Chris's profile had been updated once again. The final version of this profile featured new references to tomgirlism and a considerable de-emphasis on the importance of quick sex. Particularly notable about this update was the addition of a new photo, showing Chris to have a sickly blue complexion, thinning and receding uncut hair, and worsening obesity. This apparent decline in health is hardly surprising, considering Chris' sedentary lifestyle and gratuitous consumption of McDonald's.
Also of note is Chris' insistence that all potential dates "IGNORE ALL GOOGLE RESULTS", a mantra he has repeated on his Facebook profile and even in personal correspondence, referring people who wish to know more about him to the CWCki while simultaneously instructing them to "IGNORE ALL DEROGATORY CONTENT". Obviously, Chris had failed to realize the paradoxical effect of preemptively instructing people to ignore anything bad they may read about him, only serving to further interest in his autistic antics. Also, in this version of the profile, Chris removes all of the existing Spanish text, perhaps having realized his list of demands to which his heartsweet must conform precludes Hispanic women.
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My self-summary I am an all-around, emotionally mature, good natured, high-functioning autistic, heterosexual tomgirl artist. I feel better being treated as a person than some sort of freak or something. I am a good listener, and sometimes I have to take my time thinking about a topic or issue. I am the Original Creator of Sonichu, Rosechu, and the city of Cwcville, VA. (IGNORE ALL GOOGLE RESULTS) I like making those close to me emotionally happy. Even though, I have been feeling seriously depressed, lonely and having constant heartaches. I am looking for a woman to be my friend/Sweetheart/Future Wife from the ground up. She should be true and honest in personality, all-around, compassionate, understanding and patient. ALL Women interested in me MUST be willing to meet in person/in real life IMMEDIATELY; I have had bad online experiences numerously from a lot of fake people. Finding me in Person at my hangout is the best bet; I usually am Very cautious about any and all messages I receive online and I screen my phone calls. AND getting my attention must be direct with a pleasant greeting and introduction. Please forgive me if I respond coldly or timidly at first, I am very shy, and I am paranoid of most people and the kind of bad person they may be. What I'm doing with my life I'm keeping it real; taking it one day at a time working on my projects and helping my family. I also work on my art projects, get some exercise in; all that good stuff. I’m really good at Drawing, writing, crafting, making well-thought decisions, heavy lifting, holding a conversation, showing a woman a good time (on a date with taking her to a restaurant and/or finding a fun event to check out and share). The first things people usually notice about me I would have to give it to my face, especially in in-person times. When I look at other people, I notice their faces first most often. Aside from that, they notice my being friendly, kind and easy to converse with. Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food Goosebumps or Fear Street Novels from R.L. Stein; "Mary Poppins" is my favorite movie of all time; I like most kinds of music (but my favorite singer is Britney Spears); Mac & Cheese, Grilled Chicken. The six things I could never do without
I spend a lot of time thinking about How and where to socialize better. On a typical Friday night I am I am Very Interested in pleasantly livening up my Friday and Saturday Nights. ;) The most private thing I’m willing to admit I am very interested in sex as well as ALL of the True Love emotions, loyalty and honesty that go along with it. I am Compassionate And Passionate. I’m looking for
You should message me if You can MEET ME IN PERSON Right Now; Online Communications are OUT. As Well As If You are A) 25-30 years old, B) not black (no personal offense), C) NOT a Smoker, D) Honest, Compassionate and Pretty, E) no taller than 5'10" F) Single, G) Reside in or around Charlottesville or Ruckersville, VA, H) financially stable (I get along fair and surviving), and You'd Like to Get To Know Me Better In Person, share a pleasant conversation, etc. |
LevelUpKing profile
In July 2014, a CWCki Forums member found yet another OkCupid profile that Chris created.[1] A chat with an anonymous friend indicates that it had been set up by a gal pal by 28 June, and that Chris was so shy and incompetent that he depended on other friends to find and screen potential dates. He asked one male acquaintance to actually begin "flirty" conversations with them.
In this iteration of the profile, Chris at first comes off markedly saner than last time, having opted to substitute horrifying Honest Content with embellishments and outright lies about himself, such as claiming he enjoys recreational walking. However, despite the façade of the profile being less terrifying than in previous iterations, Chris's usual brand of aggressive insanity can be found if one scratches the surface.
For instance, in this edition of the profile he makes no mention whatsoever of neither his habit of crossdressing nor his motivation for doing it (hinting at it through his "fashion", as if that were in any way indicative). This, at first, presents a saner picture than before, but a quick foray into the horrifying "Photos" section reveals his tomgirlish ways ad nauseam, something for which his "heterosexual male" profile provides no explanation whatsoever. This makes him look like a complete lunatic.
The profile consists of many other embellishments and lies--Chris claiming that he is good at "anything art related", has a huge imagination, cares deeply for his family, etc. He implies he is the head of his household, claiming to be "looking after" Barb and the pets, the reasoning for which is conspicuously absent. One thing which has carried over from previous profiles is his demand that women verify their identity to him, Chris proclaiming that an "immediate" real-life meeting with him is "Mandetory".
There are other notable omissions - partial and total - besides Chris's tomgirlism. Chris's mentions of Legos is fairly sparse considering that when he wrote the profile he was slavishly addicted to them and spending literal thousands of dollars on sets (although unbeknownst to Chris, a 32-year-old man mentioning Legos at all would be fairly damning). Chris makes no mention whatsoever of his current living situation. As in the fourth version of his previous profile, Chris does not attempt any Spanish in this edition, although he still claims dubiously to be "okay" at it (as well as "fluent" in English). His obligatory list of things his partner must be or have is partially omitted; it is truncated in his main profile in this version, but it can be pieced together in all its glory by perusing the 1,333 personality questions he answered.
OkCupid generates a chart based on a user's answer to personality questions, in order to compare them to other users on the site. Chris was determined to be "more morally conventional", "more spiritual", "more artsy", "more sloppy", "worse mannered", "less sex driven", "less independent", "less compassionate", "less experienced in love", "less arrogant", "less scientific", and "less experienced in life" than the average OkCupid user.
The profile was mostly unused by September, for mysterious reasons. By this time, however, the account had already netted him Catherine, so he wasn't too concerned.
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My self-summary I'm an empathetic artistic individual with honest emotions. I'm genuine about how I feel and I stick to my beliefs. I care about those closest to me, especially my family. I have a big imagination and love using it towards my creations. I graduated from PVCC with an associates in Computer Aided Drafting. I try to think outside the box. My sense of fashion matches my personality and how I emotionally feel. Sometimes I'm a little scatterbrained, so please don't mind me if I jump topics. :) My hobbies/interests include creating, drawing/coloring, creating with Lego, video games, walking, music, and shopping. What I’m doing with my life Taking care of my mother and pets. I’m really good at Anything art related. I'm also pretty good at video games. The first things people usually notice about me Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food Movies: tied for #1, Mary Poppins and My Little Pony - Equeatria Girls. #2: The Lego Movie. #3: Yellow Submarine. Meet Me In St. Louis, Singin' in the Rain, On the Town, and other musicals. TV Shows: My Little Pony (all generations), Sonic the Hedgehog, Transformers, Fraiser, Keeping Up Appearances, Daria, Sailor Moon and other anime. Music: I like most types of music, including Pop, Jazz, Rock and Classic. Artists: Britney Spears, Katy Perry, the Beatles and others. The six things I could never do without No particular order. My iPhone, Lego collection and creations, video games, my family of mother, 2 beagles and cat, my artworks, my future sweetheart and children (still yet to be determined). I spend a lot of time thinking about How I can improve my life and future. On a typical Friday night I am At home, minding my small family, piddling with my Legos, watching a flick, playing a video game or whatever. And definitely Feeling lonely for an eligible woman to be my Sweetheart, closest friend and Future Wife. The most private thing I’m willing to admit I have been emotionally hurt a lot before, and I am reasonably paranoid of others, especially online. Which is WHY it is Mandetory for immediate in person meeting with me. I’m looking for
You should message me if YOU Make the First Move and Ask ME Out, Please. And if you are single, caring, compassionate, confident, honest, smoke-free, and you MUST be willing to Meet In Person IMMEDIATELY or ASAP. :) My Details Orientation: Straight Ethnicity: Native American, White Height: 5'10"(1.78m) Body type: Average Diet: Mostly anything Smokes: No Drinks: Socially Drugs: Never Religion: Christianity, and somewhat serious about it Sign: Pisces, and it's fun to think about Education: Ggraduated from two-year college Job: Other Income: - Relationship status: Single Relationship type: Strictly monogamous Offspring: Doesn't have kids, but wants them Pets: Has dogs and has cats |
Photos
Though his fashion choices have become Tomgirl-themed, Chris still clashes primary colours and looks like a clown.
A frightening photo where Chris looks like Barb when she was obese. Featuring the newest form of the Attraction Sign.
Presumably candid; Chris appears to be paranoid about something.
LevelUpQueen profile
As Chris's "relationship" with Catherine came to an end, he renewed his online Love Quest in December 2014 with a new profile which included changes to reflect his new gender identity. With his name changed to "LevelUpQueen" (which required a fee to OkCupid), he declared himself both a "Lesbian Transwoman" and a "man looking for women". Further muddying the waters, he claimed that he would "work best" for straight, bi, and lesbian women. He stressed he wanted an "open relationship" and was interested in a "menage a trois". He also seemed to have a more open attitude towards friendship; instead of looking for "girls who like guys", he was now looking for "everybody", and he also stated dubiously that he would be interested in meeting married women for "friendship". Other than these new features, the profile was very similar to the LevelUpKing incarnation.
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My Self-Summary **Looking to be in an open relationship** I'm an empathetic artistic individual with honest emotions. I'm genuine about how I feel and I stick to my beliefs. I care about those closest to me, especially my family. I have a big imagination and love using it towards my creations. I graduated from PVCC with an associates in Computer Aided Drafting. I try to think outside the box. My sense of fashion matches my personality and how I emotionally feel. Sometimes I'm a little scatterbrained, so please don't mind me if I jump topics. :) My hobbies/interests include creating, drawing/coloring, creating with Lego, video games, walking, music, and shopping. I am also a Female, Lesbian Soul in this Male Body; a Lesbian Transwoman (Very Interested in Women) (no operation). I would work best for any woman, her being straight, Bi or Lesbian. I am a very proud LGBTQ Rights supporter, and would be an activist if the event is local. I also like to attend local Pride Festivals and such events. I’m looking for Everybody Ages 23–32 Near me For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex What I’m doing with my life Taking care of my mother and pets. I’m really good at Anything art related. I'm also pretty good at video games. The first things people usually notice about me My fashion. ;) Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food Movies: tied for #1, Mary Poppins and My Little Pony - Equeatria Girls. #2: The Lego Movie. #3: Yellow Submarine. Meet Me In St. Louis, Singin' in the Rain, On the Town, and other musicals. TV Shows: My Little Pony (all generations), Sonic the Hedgehog, Transformers, Fraiser, Keeping Up Appearances, Daria, Sailor Moon and other anime. Music: I like most types of music, including Pop, Jazz, Rock and Classic. Artists: Britney Spears, Katy Perry, the Beatles and others. The six things I could never do without No particular order. My iPhone, Lego collection and creations, video games, my family of mother, 2 beagles and cat, my artworks, my future sweetheart and children (still yet to be determined). I spend a lot of time thinking about How I can improve my life and future. On a typical Friday night I am At home, minding my small family, piddling with my Legos, watching a flick, playing a video game or whatever. And definitely Feeling lonely for an eligible woman to be my Sweetheart, closest friend and Future Wife. The most private thing I’m willing to admit I have been emotionally hurt a lot before, and I am reasonably paranoid of others, especially online. Which is WHY it is Mandetory for it to be immediate in person, meeting with me. You should message me if YOU Make the First Move and Ask ME Out, Please. And if you are truly caring, compassionate and understanding, confident, honest, smoke-free, and you MUST be willing to Meet In Person IMMEDIATELY (most preferably) or ASAP. Also, if you are a married woman, I would consider meeting for pleasant, casual conversations and whatnot. And I would be involved in a menage a trois only consisting of two women. My Details Orientation: Straight Ethnicity: Native American, White Height: 5′ 10″ (1.78m) Body Type: Average Diet: Mostly anything Smokes: No Drinks: Socially Drugs: Never Religion: Christianity, and somewhat serious about it Sign: Pisces, and it’s fun to think about Education: Graduated from two-year college Job: Other Income: - Relationship Status: Single Relationship Type: Non-monogamous Offspring: Doesn’t have kids, but wants them Pets: Has dogs and has cats Speaks: English (Fluently), Spanish (Okay) |
See also
References
External links
- Chris's first OkCupid profile
- Chris's second OkCupid profile
- Chris's third OkCupid profile Archive
- Chris's fourth OkCupid profile