Difference between revisions of "PlayStation consoles"

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[[Image:20160305081202.jpg|thumb|Chris using PS4 applications - the first bit of evidence that he had purchased one.]]
[[Image:20160305081202.jpg|thumb|Chris using PS4 applications - the first bit of evidence that he had purchased one.]]


However, despite all his whining, it transpired on 5 [[March 2016]] that he had, in fact, obtained a PS4. It was widely held that Chris had just bought it for himself, but Chris credited a "Miss Kagney Lynn Moore from Seattle, Washington" as the ludicrously magnanimous donor. A closer examination of his Facebook page and of the order details showed that, of course, Chris had just bought it himself. The name of the fictional donor could be derived from Kagney Lynn Karter and Kevin Moore, who have appeared in [[Sex toys|porn films]] together.
However, despite all his whining, it transpired on 5 [[March 2016]] that he had, in fact, obtained a PS4. It was widely held that Chris had just bought it for himself, but Chris credited a "Miss Kagney Lynn Moore from Seattle, Washington" as the ludicrously magnanimous donor. A closer examination of his Facebook page and of the order details showed that, of course, Chris had just bought it himself. The name of the fictional donor could be derived from Kagney Linn Karter and Kevin Moore, who have appeared in [[Sex toys|porn films]] together.


====Epilogue====
====Epilogue====
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Image:518-PaRappa-the-Rapper-Um-Jammer-Lammy-PSP-Wallpaper.jpg|[[PaRappa the Rapper]] fun
Image:518-PaRappa-the-Rapper-Um-Jammer-Lammy-PSP-Wallpaper.jpg|[[PaRappa the Rapper]] fun
</gallery></center>
</gallery></center>
{{Relics of Fail}}
[[Category:Relics of Fail]]


===Vita===
===Vita===

Latest revision as of 14:24, 25 February 2024

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The contents of this page have been bought with taxpayer money!
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Chris has owned multiple PlayStation consoles.

Home

PS2

The Sony PlayStation 2 is a video game console released in the second generation of Sony's PlayStation consoles. Chris had a PlayStation 2 "slimline" model and in comparison to his later PlayStation 3 very little is known about it. The "slimline" model released on 25 November 2004[1] in North America. The first appearance of Chris's PlayStation 2 is in the Pixelated PS3 video released on 28 November 2006; it is unknown when Chris bought it. The first issue of Sonichu's News Dash had Chris speaking about Sony and the PS2 in derogatory terms, suggesting that at some point between October 2004 (when the slim PS2 was first introduced) and November 2006 (when his PS2 was seen in the Pixelated PS3 video), Chris reversed his opinions on the company. While there is no footage of Chris playing on his PlayStation 2 considering he owned many games[2] on the system he likely played on it. After this video Chris's PlayStation 2 does not appear or is referenced again. It is unknown if it survived the 2014 house fire.

PS3

Main article: PlayStation 3

PS4

The PlayStation 4 is a video game console created by Sony, originally released in North America on 15 November 2013. It is the best-selling console of the eighth generation of gaming, alongside the HEXbox One (with the Wii U trailing behind in sales but never falling off the market share). At least 109.05 million consoles have been sold by April 2020.[3]

Despite his fanaticism for the system's predecessor (and his tendency to spend hundreds of dollars on games for it), for two years following its release Chris made no indication of wanting to buy the life upgrade upgrade. This was most likely due to his family's health problems (compounded by his run-in with the law) draining him of funds - as evidenced by him repeatedly begging people to give him money/buy him LEGO sets.[4] He did, however, show contempt for its competition - getting banned from his local Walmart for defacing an Xbox One standee[5] - but this was the only thing he had to say about the modern "console wars" (which have been intense enough to be dramatized in South Park, among other places). True to form, though, this would change in February 2016, around his 34th birthday. He also purchased a Wii U sometime later.

Chris stopped playing the PS4 by late 2019 along with the Xbox. The PS4's successor, PlayStation 5, was released in November 2020 at a starting price of $399 and has yet to be purchased by Chris.

The birthday saga

On 1 February 2016, Chris asked for a PS4 and PlayStation Camera on Facebook[6] alongside a slew of specifications - notably, he would later specify[7] a white Destiny bundle. Whomsoever saw fit to waste their hard-earned money on this gift would be "reimbursed" with a $500 voucher for Chris's Etsy shop - Chris naturally believing that his comics, medallions, and amiibo are worth hundreds of dollars. In fact, a $500 voucher would probably allow the donator to buy everything in the shop and still have around $50 in now-useless funds to spare. Having already given extremely specific demands for this "gift", Chris would further elaborate[8] that buying him anything less than the Destiny bundle and camera would reduce the value on the voucher.

On 12 February, Chris uploaded Apologies for offending people, a video that opens with a customarily insincere apology - though he openly states he doesn't understand why anyone would be offended - then reiterates his demands at the end of the video.

Incredibly, 24 February came and went without anyone sending him a PS4 - instead, weens sent Chris worthless gift cards and a losing lottery ticket. A day later, he would upload Update: 2/25/16, another video complaining about this. Bizarrely, Chris appeared to have been so confident that someone would send him an expensive video game console that he became somewhat depressed when they didn't.

Chris using PS4 applications - the first bit of evidence that he had purchased one.

However, despite all his whining, it transpired on 5 March 2016 that he had, in fact, obtained a PS4. It was widely held that Chris had just bought it for himself, but Chris credited a "Miss Kagney Lynn Moore from Seattle, Washington" as the ludicrously magnanimous donor. A closer examination of his Facebook page and of the order details showed that, of course, Chris had just bought it himself. The name of the fictional donor could be derived from Kagney Linn Karter and Kevin Moore, who have appeared in porn films together.

Epilogue

Having spent hundreds of dollars on a toy, Chris began to beg incessantly for donations he did nothing to earn shortly after in many videos.

By October 2019, Chris had ceased regularly playing the PS4 - his PSN account shows that the last trophy earned was in a Hyperdimension Neptunia game.[9] In August 2020, a fan asked about his PS4 activity, to which Chris answered that the "amount of stuff" in the room was a problem for setting up his consoles and that he was more focused on the Dimensional Merge instead.[10]

PS4 games Chris owns


PSN Activity tracker
Chris was last spotted playing Minecraft for the PS4.
Chris has spent over $8581.62 of YOUR money!

Chris's PSN is Sonichu. You can see his profile here.

Note: This table only covers games Chris has earned at least one trophy in. Another table is shown below covering games that are at 0% and he has evidently not touched. A full list can be seen on his PSN profile, here.

Game Trophies Progress Comments
LEGO DIMENSIONS 78 100% A "toys-to-life" game (ala Skylanders or amiibo) that is rather infamous for being much more expensive than its competitors.
Life is Strange 61 100%
My Name is Mayo 51 100%
Ratchet & Clank 47 100%
Life is Strange: Before the Storm 35 100%
The Order: 1886 22 100%
Level 22 21 100%
Sonic Mania 18 100%
Letter Quest Remastered 12 100%
Three Fourths Home: Extended Edition 7 100%
Crash Bandicoot 2: Cortex Strikes Back 22 87%
Sonic Forces 45 80% Chris purchased three copies of this game, each for different consoles.
Crash Bandicoot 21 80%
Yu-Gi-Oh! Legacy of the Duelist 17 80%
Back to Bed 13 80%
Gone Home 9 71%
Bubsy: The Woolies Strike Back 10 68%
Bendy and the Ink Machine 16 52%
PaRappa the Rapper Remastered 19 51%
Don't Die, Mr. Robot! 7 38%
Minecraft: PlayStation 4 Edition 38 31%
Burnout Paradise Remastered 25 31%
Giana Sisters: Twisted Dreams - Director's Cut 6 31%
LEGO Worlds 26 29%
Crash Bandicoot: Warped 10 23%
Little Big Planet 3 10 21%
Uncharted: Drakes' Fortune Remastered 15 20%
Roundabout 4 20%
PaRappa the Rapper 2 4 19%
THE BIT.TRIP 9 18%
Freedom Planet 3 15%
Pure Chess 3 14%
Minecraft: Story Mode 7 13%
The Disney Afternoon Collection 2 10%
Hyperdimension Neptunia 7 10%
Skylanders SuperChargers 5 9%
DC Universe Online 5 8%
Destiny 6 7% Star of a "Let's Play" (that was completely silent, thanks to Chris's cluelessness).
Sword Art Online: Lost Song 4 6%
THE PLAYROOM 2 6% A collection of AR minigames built into the system. Most notable for being banned from streaming after a man stripped and groped his unconscious wife live. [1]
Shovel Knight 4 5%
Tetris Ultimate 1 4%
ZOMBI 3 4%
Skylanders Trap Team 2 3%
Cyberdimension Neptunia: 4 Goddesses Online 2 2%
God of War 2 2%
Guitar Hero Live 2 2%
Mother Russia Bleeds 2 2%
Skylanders SWAP Force 2 2%
Mighty No. 9 1 1%
Transformers Devastation 1 1%
PAYDAY 2: Crimewave Edition 1 1% Bought and played under the influences of Idea Guys.

Games at 0%

Chris has 29 games that have been purchased but without trophies or progress which can be assumed to have not been booted up.

Game Release Date
Uncharted 2: Among Thieves Remastered 2015
Hitman GO: Definitive Edition 2016
Uncharted 3: Drake's Deception Remastered 2015
Toy Soldiers War Chest 2015
HELLDIVERS 2015
The Treasures of Montezuma 4 2015
PixelJunk Shooter Ultimate 2015
The Swapper 2014
Hohokum 2014
inFAMOUS Second Son 2014
Woah Dave! 2014
Retro City Rampage DX 2014
Race The Sun 2014
Grim Fandango Remastered 2015
Killzone Shadow Fall 2013
Call of Duty: Black Ops III 2015
Nova-111 2015
Thomas Was Alone 2014
Terraria 2014
Hotline Miami 2014
Invokers Tournament 2015
KNACK 2013
Lone Survivor 2013
Shütshimi 2015
DOOM 2016
Overwatch: Origins Edition 2016
Psycho-Pass: Mandatory Happiness 2016
Uncanny Valley 2017

PS5

On 31 August 2023, Chris was observed on the PlayStation Network playing a demo version of Street Fighter 6 (a PS5 game).[11][12]

Handheld

PSP

Chris's PSP, adorned in Sonichu imagery. Shocking, no?

Chris's PlayStation Portable, in true and honest CWC fashion, is covered with cut-out pictures of Sonichu, Rosechu, Chris himself, and the colors yellow and blue (to match the S-Chu Ball). It was revealed in Chris's Big Night Out (12 June 2009), when the cameraman cleverly revealed it from beneath the re-usable Target bag it was hidden under.

The "decals," if they can even be referred to as such, are not applied directly to the PSP, but rather to an outer protective case, quite possibly to allow for easy switching of collages. This relic is unique, because it is the first of Chris's projects to feature accurate representations of his appearance, rather than his slim n' trim, svelte alter-ego from the comics. Behind Chris there is another decal, part of an overhead view of CWCville. The Sonichu decal is somewhat out of the ordinary, being the original Sonichu from 2000, rather than his updated anime-styled appearance from the post-Sonichu #5 comics.

Chris later bought the PSP's successor, the PlayStation Vita. It's unknown whether either of the consoles survived the fire, though it's likely he bought new systems if that's the case.

Gallery

Vita

The PlayStation Vita is the successor to the PSP. Chris got one two days after its American release, on his 30th birthday, 24 February 2012. It also brought his biggest spending splurge for quite some time, as in the weeks after, seventeen new games appeared on his PSN account. This suggests that he spent $470.83 on games alone, and with Vita going for $299.99, Chris spent $770.82 (plus tax) at the very least, proving that, with Bob dead, the tugboat is Chris's to waste as he pleases.

Chris bought (all prices are estimates):

  • Army Corps of Hell: $39.99
  • Dungeon Hunter: Alliance: $35.99
  • Escape Plan: $14.99
  • Little Deviants: $29.99
  • Lumines Electronic Symphony: $35.99
  • ModNation Racers: Road Trip: $29.99
  • MotorStorm: RC: $9.99
  • Plants vs. Zombies: $14.99
  • Rayman Origins: $39.99
  • Reality Fighters: $29.99
  • Sumioni: $19.99
  • Super Stardust Delta: $9.99
  • Tales from Space: Mutant Blobs Attack: $7.99
  • Touch My Katamari: $29.99
  • Uncharted: Golden Abyss: $44.99
  • Unit 13: $35.99
  • WipEout 2048: $39.99

Of course, Chris may have availed of multibuy discounts, download-only discounts, and probably got one of these games free with the Vita. Against that, it's very likely that he also shelled out for memory card(s), a carry case, DLC, other games that we haven't seen on PSN yet, etc.

References