Imaginary family

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Chris Chan has numerous family members that exist only in C-197, while Chris has put some real-life counterparts into his imaginary world, this article covers those who have been made up entirely by Chris. This page will not cover Sonichu or the Chaotic combo since they already have their own pages and while Sonichu does refer to Chris as "father" or "mama", this is more along the lines of Chris being his benevolent creator rather than an actual family.

Like most, if not all of Chris's original characters; pretty much all of them exist purely to worship him or to give him extra powers in the comic.

Sonichu - Issue 12, Cover.jpg


Cherokee Clan leader

Main article: Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan
Native American Representation

The leader of the Cherokian Clan is a fictional ancestor of Chris, originating from Chris’s belief that he is part Cherokee, which was disproven in 2018 after Chris took a 23andme dna test.

The character is a Caucasian Aryan man wearing a Roman chest plate Halloween costume, showing how little Chris knew about the people he supposedly descended from. The character looks identical to Chris, who is meant to be his reincarnation.

He first makes an appearance in episode 7 of sonichu #2, introducing himself as Chris’s ancestor, tells him to kill Count Graduon, and gives him his sonichu powers.

Crystal Weston Chandler (twin)

Main article: Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)

Patti-Chan

He couldn't let her rest now, did he?
Main article: Patti-Chan

Patti Chandler (17 March 1988 - 27 June 2006) was Chris's childhood dog, a Beagle-spitz mix who was put down in 2006, then brought back as a character in CWCville. Patti grew up with Chris and was the closest thing he had to a sibling, since his half brother wanted nothing to do with his family. In a phone call with Clyde Cash, Chris compares the death of Clyde’s brother to the death of Patti, offending Clyde. Chris defended this by stating that Patti was like a sibling.

Chris brought Patti back to life in Sonichu 6 as Patti-Chan (a character created by Megan Schroeder to help Chris cope with the loss of his beloved pet), where she somehow gained the ability to walk, talk, and apply for welfare in CWCville.


Sonichus and Rosechus


Sonichu

I will! Thank you, Father!
Sonichu 0 cover art
Sonichu - Issue 0, Cover.jpg

Being Sonichu’s creator, Chris is established as a fatherly figure towards Sonichu and even has his creation call him “father” in the comics, despite there being no relation between the two nor an origin story for how they met. In real life, whenever Chris is “possessed” by Sonichu, he refers to himself as “mama” and when redrawing his cover art for Sonichu #0 HD, he made Sonichu call him "Mother" to match with his current female pronouns.

Unfortunately this relationship would become much more disturbing later down the line, with Chris performing several sexual acts on him due to the influence of the trolls, most notably, the Idea Guys.

Russel and Cynthia

Back in human form, she extracted some of her essence. Then in (female) Sonichu form, she shot her essence up herself ... After that, when she tried to transform back to human, she could not. She was stuck in her Chris Chan Sonichu form. Then between Magi-Chan and the examinations at the hospital, she was knocked up for sure.
Chris, on the beautiful act of conception.
The twins, ravenous for affection.

Russel Sonee and Cynthia Rosey are Chris's fictional Sonee and Rosey children. After Chris's Sonichu form became female to correspond with his newfound female identity, he got the notion to use his own semen to impregnate himself, thus conceiving Russel and Cynthia. Miraculously, neither of the twins emerged as hideous mutants, and Chris proudly insists that they're completely autism-free.

This little experiment behind him, Chris shoved them off on Heather Iglesias, claiming to visit them every now and again. They are first seen in Sonichu #12, attending the CWCville pride festival with their lesbian nanny. On catching sight of Chris, they immediately run up and cling to him, telling him they miss him. Chris gives them a dismissive "awww!" before coldly allowing Heather to take them away.

Chris described the conception again in 2020: "She did the thing from between her ol’ cock and moving the spunk into her vag, and had to stay stuck in Sonichu form until Russel and Cynthia were born for a few weeks. After that, she went back to her human form, and she had to go through the similar quick process that Roberta went through, but the Estrogen was coming in quicker with C-Chan, since her alt-form was now female."[1]

Reginald Chandler

Alternatively, if I have a boy as well, I would name him Reginald; that was not a dream-thing though. I've had a past internet gal-pal, who would have likely become my girlfriend after she got here from her native land of Australia after finishing College there with a Teacher Degree. We role-played a family day with the children, and she chose the name of Reginald for the boy-child.
Chris[2]
Chris and Baby Reginald Chandler (Reginald is the stupid little blue stud) from PlayingHouse

Reginald Chandler is Chris's imaginary son and brother to his fictitious daughter Crystal. He pees on the ceiling.[3] He is briefly mentioned in chats with Panda.

His origins seemingly begin with PandaHalo and her discussions with Chris about the married life they will have in the future (as for Chris, a single date will inevitably lead to a long and happy marriage).

Although Reginald has been mentioned several times in conversation, he is nothing in comparison to his younger sister in Chris's eyes. Reginald has no persona in the comics (except possibly as Reginald Sneasel) and has never appeared to Chris in a dream. Since the untimely death of PandaHalo, Reginald has not been mentioned outside of direct questioning and a recent video, although it is likely that Chris would still name his hypothetical first-born son Reginald all the same.

Reginald was featured in the PlayingHouse video, where Chris pretends Jackie is the mother of his children. This time he was depicted as the younger brother to Crystal. While Crystal can write in a diary despite being in preschool, Reginald was mitigated to speaking only in baby babble. The only interaction Chris has with him is complaining about cleaning up the mess he made in the bathroom, changing his diaper, mentioning that he threw up several times during dinner (never stopping to wipe him off), and demanding he stay quiet for the night so he can fuck his wife in peace. It's interesting to note that Chris mentions that Reginald sits in a booster seat, not a high chair. While it's likely Chris doesn't know the difference, it also implies Reginald is big enough to be a toddler. Being a toddler who can only speak in gibberish suggests he inherited a lot from his father.

In April 2019, Future message from Crystal W Chandler was uploaded to YouTube, purporting to depict a visit from a time-traveling Reginald.

Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)

Main article: Crystal Weston Chandler (daughter)

Could Chris actually have a child?

Maybe. Although it would probably require a fair bit of luck and the kid is likely to come out being retarded.

Prior to becoming transgender, Chris's chances of conceiving his God-given daughter were extremely slim, but not impossible – it was at least possible for him to impregnate a woman, however unlikely that would have been owing to obesity's effect on fertility and rather more pressingly actually finding a willing female. However, once Chris began using HRT in sessions, Chris destroyed what fertility he once possessed, rendering the odds of actually conceiving a child at near 0%. While he is on the medication, we can't be quite sure if he is taking it regularly or in the right amounts.

In November 2014, after being rejected by a sperm bank, he even went as far as asking a friend to be the vessel which will allow Crystal to enter our world,[4] but as addressed, he is no longer producing potent sperm. A later video showcased that he has difficulty getting an erection in spite of mass debating for three straight minutes, which just adds to his list of problems. In Chris's defense, however, he had just pissed all over the floor, and such an event usually makes it a bit harder to get it up, and he was under distress due to the manipulation of the Idea Guys, who convinced him that they would only stop torturing his imaginary wife if he made the sex tape. That being said, some later text-based details of ambiguous authenticity during Chris's "soul-bonding" with his mother in 2021 suggested that he used his penis to have sex with Barb. Although Barb was long since infertile at that point, Chris allegedly wore a condom anyway. It's probably for the better though, as the last thing we need in this world are Barb and Chris having zombie children.

In September 2020, Chris explained that he still has interest in getting a sexual reassignment operation in the hopes of being able to give birth,[5] although he seemingly dropped the idea in the following years, wishing to remain with his genitals for some unknown reason. Unfortunately for Chris, those who undergo a male-to-female sexual reassignment surgery are incapable of carrying children. Although some scientists are looking into the possibility of transplanting uteruses into transgender women, Chris would likely be too old or too unhealthy to bear children in the event of such a breakthrough – and that's all presuming that he could save up enough to pay for that in the first place, which seems like wishful thinking, considering that money seems to be the only thing that Chris can't hoard and he prefers buying Transformers anyway.

In short, Chris will die childless: as long as he avoids sinking his finances to the point of foreclosure, the toys that Chris claimed to hoard for his future children will go to the State of Virginia if there is no will, and none of his other family members step in.[6] Amen.

Should Chris actually have a child?

If you are genuinely asking this question, then you really don't know anything about Chris. Parenting is an enormous task that takes huge amounts of effort and competence to pull off correctly; as with Chris himself even if you have two of the most loving parents imaginable an unhealthy mix of stupidity, coddling and manipulation can easily turn any child into a monster.

First and foremost Chris is extremely negligent; which is a trait picked up from his own parents. Name a thing in his life that he was tasked with taking care of and you will quickly find that he has left them to rot and rust away; even with things that he cares about he doesn't take particularly good care of and regularly leaves to break because he can't be bothered to actually take care of anything. Children need attention and care, especially during their younger years when they simply cannot take care of themselves; for example, can Chris successfully potty train a child when he cannot do the same with his dogs or even himself? Obviously not.

This is exacerbated by the fact that paradoxically, despite Chris's obsessive desire to be a parent, he has no actual interest in parenting. In the comics where he is both mother and father to Russel and Cynthia; he has Heather Iglesias take care of them in lieu of showing them any attention himself (with the two children showing obvious signs of parental abandonment), in PlayingHouse Chris also makes it rather obvious that he actually intends to neglect his children with Reginald being allowed to wallow in his own filth and vomit (while having not being taught to speak) while Crystal is expected to take care of herself despite being 4 years old.

Children also cost money and lots of it. Unfortunately for Chris, Virginia is among the top ten most expensive states to raise a child in (around 8th place at an annual $23,029) [7] which means that even if Chris was responsible with his money, didn't have an ungodly amount of debt to pay off and didn't have a group of exploiters taking a giant chunk out of his monthly payment; his livestream money and his monthly tugboat simply wouldn't be able to cover it (and that's assuming he has no other expenses).

And finally while in the past it would be considered speculation or something an A-log would say (even regarding some worrying comments on Facebook), nowadays it's obvious that Chris is okay with questionably consensual incest, especially parental incest between a mother and her child. Regarding his previous comments on Facebook regarding incest with one's own child, he was not only accepting over the act but actually encouraged it claiming said act was good experience for the child only adding the condition that the sexual relationship should not be "abusive or hurtful" completely disregarding that not only is sex with a child by definition abusive (and by extension hurtful) because children are not able to consent to sex.

In short, if by some miracle Chris was actually capable of conceiving children and somehow being allowed to keep them, they would grow up sick, hungry, penniless, neglected, abused, and/or dead.

External links

References

See also