Bionic the Hedgehog

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Bionic, front row centre at an Elton John concert.
An early image of Bionic, circa 1996.
Autism Astuim conquered! Remarkable! Now he just needs to conquer cross-eyedness and his colors flowing outside of the lines!
Bionic the Hedgehog is Sonic the Hedgehog's long-lost brother. He is a professional basketball star and hand with tools in mechanics. He can score over 100 baskets in a single B-Ball game.
Bionic the Hedgehog Animal Crossing card

Bionic the Hedgehog (born 13 November 1986[1]) was Chris's first major creation. Brother of Sonic the Hedgehog. Loves to play basketball. He is paired up with punk enthusiast and blatant furfag (with emphasis on "fag") Megagi Skunk.

It is known that Chris created him way back in high school, November 13 1996. When he was standing in the middle of the hallway next to a basketball field staring into nothingness like a retard. He claims that he was daydreaming about the imaginary cock of another Sega-made furfag "Mighty the Armadillo".[2]

Anyway he's standing there like a tardie, next thing you know BLAM! Nigga gets hit on his face with a basketball. So CWC claims that "opened the lockers to his mind" and inspired him to create his first Sonic recolor. PUFF! We gots ourselves an original character. Don't steal it you guys he created it first!

Much like the other characters in his brilliant comic, Bionic is an image to some aspects of Chris, like Naitsirch being gay. On issue 8, he goes on claiming showing off to his autistic Daddy how his skunk girlfriend blew him on the second date, and that on the third they were gonna get some hot hedgehog yiffing action. Chris has gone on record saying that couples usually get it on on the third date.

Despite his name, Bionic is not a cyborg. So why did Chris decided to name him "Bionic"? Because, well, it's Chris.


Sauces