Sonichu 9 Official Videobook

On 19 September 2009, Chris started uploading the official videobooks from Sonichu 8.

Episode 19

Part 1

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Part 2

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Part 3

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Transcript

OK, we're going to start on book number 9, which is fine, hm. Anyway once again, all Sonichu material is copyright March 17th 2000 by me, Christian Weston Chandler. Any names or persons illustrated in any of the comics except for myself that may seem similar to anyone in real life or fiction are purely coincidental or otherwise parodic.

Anyway here's the cover for book number 9. It is a good piece of artwork isn't it? Ah. In the featured in the uhh... in the episode 20 will be redone version of timmy1984's Sonichu fan promos, which I thought were pretty good but rewording could have been... used greatly. Cause he used the wrong words. Anyway

Episode 19: Date Ed. Dating Education. Even though the idea sounds dated (laughs). April 3rd, 2008, at CWCVille University. (sings). Wild and Punchy are on their way into the university. And then Wild says:

"Ah, CWCVille U, when not in the classroom, it's a great social spring"

Punchy: "oh yeah. I'm gonna take every note possible and I'm gonna show Angie a great time by May or June. huh."

Pun- and Wild's nervous right now: "yeah Punchy, so ambitious. Huh. I wonder who my woman will be."

Nearby are Simonla and Zapina, hangin' out. hm. Well... oh, Wild goes on saying "don't pull my leg God, don't belabour it."

Anyway, Simonla's saying to Zapina "Well have a good day at [?] High, Zapina. Learn a lot. Find a good 16 year old boy and your mom and dad will pick you up later"

Zapina: "Thank you Simonla. Zmmm. [?]. They ought to pay you more for being the best friend ever, in addition to being the best babysitter ever! Well you enjoy your classes too! I'll see ya! ZIP!"

BZZZ! hm.

Simonla: "Maybe I'll- Maybe I'll get paired up with a great man, I have a dream of having a boy and nurturing him and loving my hubby. My ros- my son's name will be Reginald Sonee. hehe!"

Later in the classroom, Wild's sitting there nervous like (laughs). And... Simonla's not so nervous like

"Wow there are an equal number of genders in this class counting myself"

Wild's thinking "Oh I'm so nervous, my head is paralyzed. It won't turn at all!"

And Punchy's confident: "Hehe. I'm gonna ace this class and wow my christian angel! Hehehaha yeahh!"

Then enters their teacher, Ms Jackarass. Ms Jackarass: "Good morning class. Welcome to dating education. I am Ms Jackarass. I will now pass around the syllabus for the course. Please read over them at your own pace. We'll be cutting to the chase in this class even though it's only the first day. I will be pairing you all up as boy and girl couples secretly, and any remaining single or singles will be paired up with a non- with a friend or associate of mine. I myself am not available as it would be against school regulations, and I am already going out with a good cowboy! Yeehah!

Today, I will be lending out Barbara dolls for the men in this class, and Robert dolls for the women! After each of you have handed to me your written reasons for attending the class, and semester, for the first few weeks you each will practise what I teach you, and comm- and communicating with real people of your individual opposite genders! On your dolls I have loaned you, each of you, loaned each of you.

The first time is great- of great importance- the first item of great importance is to always remain calm and keep all flustered emotions off your mind when first approaching the member of your opposite gender. It will take practise to tweak your minds to hold your fears back, but I assure you, it will be well worth it in the end, with all your lucky nights! Ahaha! Just messing with ya! Ahaaa. Ahh you'll need to start- you will need to start any of all relationships by being friends first! That's most important!

Now. If you start off with beyond friend in mind, then the other person will feel nervous, and will-and will most likely walk away, ignore you or whatever. Let the romantic emotions grow between the two of you over a reasonable amount of time. A few weeks or even a few months with multiple meetings and dates with the person are well recommended. And as a gentleman, you should ask before even touching her, or ladies, you may ask him if it is cool for you to touch him, as a gesture respecting kindness.

And now [?], and now that I have established all of that, I will take roll call"

"Amy"

"Here!"

"Clem"

"Here!"

"Clyde"

"Eyyy"

"Emily"

"Here!"

"[?]"

"Here!"

"Fred"

"EHEHEY!"

"Geraldine"

"Here!"

"George"

"Hoho"

"Layla"

"Here!"

"Ivy"

"Here!"

"Punchy"

"Yo"

"Reginald"

"Here...here!"

"Simonla"

"Here, yo!"

"Wild"

"SNERGEN FLERGEN!!!"

[Chris laughs]

"What?"

"Oh i'm sorry, er... here! Here, here."

"O...KAY! Well let's st- let's start with the greetings. To quote a wise 9-year old, if you want to start a conversation with a girl, or a guy ladies, first you have to say something like "hi". If he or she says hi back, you are off to a good start.

.........

Reginald's thinking, looking at the lovely Layla, "wow, she is so cute! The class syllabus says the pairings will be made for the IM portion. I hope I get matched up with her!"

Layla (mumbles): "...if he doesn't like you, do not worry it happens. Another good way to..."

....

In the mean time Ivy is scribbling too.

............ping.

Something- and then suddenly, a thought-and then suddenly, a telepathic image occurs, doo doo doo between me and her. It turns out we are destined summoned by God and Jesus. hm.

God: " Children, I am God. I have summoned you two here because I am answering Christian's prayers. Chris this is Ivy, your sweetheart-to-be"

Jesus: "And I'm Jesus. 'Sup?"

Chris: "Uhhh hello Ivy

Ivy: "Hi Christian. Whats goin' on?"

Chris: "I'm livin' safe and well. What about you?"

Ivy: "I'm ok"

Chris: "Tell me about yourself"

Ivy: "well I'm living in blah blah blah blah my father is uhhh blah blah I shop often at blah blah blah"

Chris: "Hm. Well it all has checked out. You are true. Wow my biological clock is fixed. I trust you and I believe you. I love you Ivy, my heart is dedicated to you.

Ivy: "aww. I'm happy for you and I'm happy to help. I love you Chris"

God: "You will recognise her [?] as your sweetheart because from a fav- from a favor on her half, your internal clock will be restored fully, your enemies of 4-cent-garbage will be vanquished, so you both will live together in peace. Live freely."

hmmm

God: "this is a future. Occurrences may occur. I have spoken."

Jesus: "so have I. Hehe. I'm hanging with my pop."

God: "ah y'all take care"

...........

Then we warp out of that zone, back into the classroom.

Ivy: "woooow. wow."

And a lot of time has passed in the class since then but anyway, Ms Jackarass says: "OK class, as our f- time is almost up, i need to inform you that I have gone through the-my roster, and I have randomly matched eassstudent- each student male with female, and I have each of your screen names written on these slips along with the screen names of your matched partners. I will be handing out the slips now. No trades, swaps or changes are allowed. For any of the pairings, y'all each will be chatting with your partners in instant messages online sections in the computer lab in the next few classes. For your homework tonight, converse with your assigned GI Joes, ladies, and likewise your assigned Barbies, gentlemen, like you were conversing with that person of your opposite gender. Handwrite out your pretend conversations as it happens, or shortly after from memory. Then handwrite a minimum of 50 word essay on your thoughts about the conversation. Class dismissed".

For Truth and Honesty, see the archived CWCipedia page on Sonichu Book 9 Videobooks