Jackie E-mails 18

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This page lists e-mails exchanged between Chris and Jackie from 12 October to 22 October 2010.

They kick off with Chris apologizing for not being able to do a pull-up, followed by Jackie demanding for a bunch of new video content. Chris complies with some of them, but is unable to complete others because his computer (allegedly) constantly freezes. Jackie can see the Trophies tally up, with timestamps, on his PSN account, and calls him out on it, suggesting that Chris sell his PS3 games. Chris refuses to comply.

October 12, 2010 - 11:40pm

I'm sorry I wasn't on soon enough to read you being online tonight. I had all of the things to worry about today, including the pull-ups, which unfortunately and Strictly Confidential, flopped. I tried hard to do the pull-ups, but I couldn't even do one; I'm heavy. I've discreetly uploaded that embarrassing video for you to see for yourself. Keep that video confidential as well, please. I will delete it about this afternoon. As a consolation for YouTube, I made a lame imitation of Cleveland Brown purchasing crappy computers then building a stock car out of the parts after the eMachines and Dell crashed.

I misspoke on my physical ability on the pull-ups, and I am sorry for that. But at least I did try for you. Shit! Last time I checked, I was around 210 lbs. :( *sigh*

I will do the fake webcam for you tomorrow, and also, I have a fun new photo for you I created with a PSMove Demo that came from the Demo Disc. :)

I'll log on tomorrow night for an AIM with you; if you'll be unavailable, please let me know.

Stay Safe and Sweet.
I Love You, Jackie.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
Christian

October 13, 2010 - 9:45am

Hey Chris!

Thanks for sending me the video of your attempted pull-ups. If nothing else, at least I know you tried. And hey, it just shows that you need to work out some more, right?

I look forward to seeing the "webcam" video tonight. And I'll be on, so we can have a chat. Talk to you then!!

XO XO XO XO XO

Jackie

October 14, 2010 - 4:50pm

Chris, you didn't upload the video like you said you would last night. Where are you? Are you missing? Should I call the cops? What happened?

Jackie

October 14, 2010 - 7:09pm

I recorded the video of me being harry Potter last night. By the time I got to my PC, it froze up again. I tried like 25 more times, but it wouldn't get back to the desktop. Although it did go up to the farthest beforehand MS XP loading window. I decided to hold off on the upload until after I get the tower from downstairs up here. I am going to get it done tonight. I did get the Kaluah today, drank some, put on the bandana, cap and tough guy wrist straps I have, andrecorded the video. The kaluah isn't bad, but I feel the combination of coffee, chocolate and liqour isn't a swift flavor combination. I got a bottle for only 8 bucks.

I'll upload the two videos later.

TTYL
Stay Safe and Sweet.
XOXOXOXOOXOXOXOXO <3<3<3<3<3<3<3
Christian.

October 14, 2010 - 7:15pm

Oh, good Chris. I'm glad you're okay, I was a little worried. Thanks for checking in with me. I look forward to seeing the two videos!

Jackie

October 15, 2010 - 3:05pm

Hey Chris! Thanks for getting those videos up for me. Hey, I'd like you to do the pregnancy-theme video tonight. Here's the story: My aunt was telling me the other day of something really sweet her husband did for her years ago when she was pregnant with my cousin. My aunt was sore and in pain for a lot of her pregnancy, because carrying around a giant fetus in your womb is backbreaking work and what not, so her husband actually put on a false pregnancy weight that he wore around his stomach and wore it sometimes, to show that he shared her pain and that they were in this pregnancy together. It was just the sweetest gesture. I'd love it if you made a video where you strapped some pillows under your shirt, or some other kind of weight, and showed yourself enduring the stress of pregnancy. It would be such a romantic gesture! And after the baby was born, my aunt's husband wore this strap on his chest that he could attach milk bottles to, so he could actually "breast feed" the baby, so to speak. That way my aunt didn't have to do it all the time. Do you have like a doll or something that you could pretend to be a baby? I'd love to see you pretend that you were breastfeeding our baby. I think it's such a turn-on when a man wants to be domestic like that... :) (You don't need the milk-bottle strap or anything, just pretend you're breast-feeding.)

Anyway, look forward to seeing it!!

XO XO XO

Jackie

October 15, 2010 - 3:18pm

I was thinking of dong the pregnancy video tonight anyway. Also, you didn't answer my question the other night on the article for your school paper I was interviewed on; is the date set on the article's release yet? And I've put my zords on Craigslist last night; we'll see about scoring money from this deal soon enough. Out of them all, I've decided to hang on to the first most set of the original Megazord, Dragonzord and Titanus put together to make the Ultra Megazord. Out of them all, I felt they did their best job on the first time around compared to the future models. In any case, if I sell all of the rest, that wll still be over a hundred easy. And next month, it is all about you and me meeting up, dating and all that fun stuff from my income of the month, and future months beyond that.

I'll TTYL. Stay Safe and Sweet,
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
Christian

October 16, 2010 - 2:20am

I'm between PC towers right now, and things are here and there. I'm still working on it. But I did record the videos of me being pregnant for you. I wish the PS3 would recognize the format my digital camera records in; it would save me the having to go through the PC. I'll keep you updated and let you know when I'll be back in operation fully PC-wise.

To compensate for now, I'm attaching a photograph of me in my Big Fake Breasts; I was Jugnormous. I have one more in the following e-mail; please keep these photos only for yourself.

I'll bug ya later.
Stay Safe and Sweet with Lots of Love.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
Christian

October 16, 2010 - 7:10pm

Hey Chris, you know, you could check your email a little more frequently and respond when I ask if you'll be around, especially since you know by now that I email you questions like that during the day. I'd rather hear that you won't be available to chat, than not hear anything at all from you. A little effort on your part is all I'm asking.

Jackie

October 17, 2010 - 5:09pm

You are right, I should have checked earlier, but I have been busy with the computer swap, and my father got in the way; he took back the tower I brought up from downstairs. But I have made some progress. I may have found a way to make my console recognize .MOV format video files and allow me to directly copy, edit and upload them onto YouTube. I will be performing the final steps for this method shortly.

I will inform you when I will be able to AIM with you; until then, assume no. I am sorry, and I miss our text conversations. At least I am working hard and doing what I can for now. Also, I have not rrceived any solid offers for my zords yet, but I'm prayin' for the sells, so I can get further towards that new computer. I may go for a laptop, but do not quote me on that yet. I am also working on isolating and looking to fix the problem that is keeping my a345c from booting up. The other HP computer does work, but I have some difficulty getting it online, and it is slow on loading. It has Windows ME; obviously not compatible with Windows XP, so an HDD swap there would not work likely.[1]

BTW, for the Sat and Sun videos, I did one where I'm dressed up like Gilligan, and I sing his "To Be or Not To Be" song from "The Producer" episode. And the other, I made up a makeshift apron, paper hat, and imitated Lucille Ball doing the Vitameatavegamin commercial. I am doing my big part on keeping up with the videos.

Please help me back by finding anyone who would be interested in purchasing my zords; children who like Power Rangers, or any adult toy collectors, and informing him or her of what I have.

I'll check in again later.

Stay Safe and Sweet. I Love You, Jackie.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
Christian.

October 17, 2010 - 5:55pm

Considering what you have done these past few days - getting trophy after trophy on your PSN (I know how to check how much time you've been spending playing games online, baby…), I think you should make the videos I actually asked you to make in addition to these ideas. This will be considered your make up homework, and I will provide you with extra credit for these requirements. Yes, they are required. I'll re-list the ones I wanted to see here, along with some new ones:

bollywood video! my cousins and I loooove bollywood. It is soooo romantic and exotic. I want you dress up like the LEAD GIRL IN THE FILM. She is wearing a SARI. Clothes are just clothes, boys can wear dresses and girls can wear pants! Bras are for everyone! I want a red dot on your forehead, too. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1L7IOh2J0cs This is this film. SING along with the music (I want to hear it LOUD AND CLEAR in the background) and I want you to dance like the beautiful women. Seductive. Follow the main actress.
tee pee in your back yard. Like a fort, but it must be a tee pee. Smoke a peace pipe and offer it to the camera.
• I want a video of you playing House! As Daddy, Mommy (Jackie, me), and Reginald and Crystal. Dress up as each member of our family and state your roles to the camera while acting like the character. I want Reginald to be just a baby in it, too. A 2 year old. Please be accurate with your clothing, no cardboard or construction paper allowed.
• Dress up as Captain K’nuckles. Make a bubbie to sit on your shoulder instead of a parrot! Sing a sea shanty ABOUT ADVENTURE AND CANDY. EAT A LOT OF CANDY ON SCREEN.
Work out video! RICHARD SIMMONS style. Jumping jacks, twirling, kicking feet to the music of my favorite cardio soundtrack: ASS n TITTIES.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sM6KuBUeAKc
I want this music playing the background, loud and clear.
A day in the life of Chris video. I want you to give me a tour of Charlottesville and describe your favorite destinations. I would love if you could interview locals, too. Along the way, you can talk about how life has been this past year and what you've been up to.. At the end of the vide I want you to say "At least my head's not a FUCKING ORANGE". This is in reference to Clyde tanning to much and being judgmental and uggers. PLEASE SAY THAT EXACT SENTENCE. BUT DO NOT mention who it's reference too. Just say ""At least my head's not a FUCKING ORANGE". Then smile at the camera and say bye byes!! :)
Sonichu Babies - sock puppets of your Sonichu characters performing a play.
Presidential Campaign and Debate video - pitch your platform for fixing the country, and have a debate against an opponent, any troll opponent, whoever you like.

To be honest Chris, I was very very emotional this morning when I saw all the new trophies. But, in light of your new e-mail… I am filled with renewed feelings. I am optimistic that you will do your assignments and treat them like you did your finals in high school. Thanks for being sooooo driven, Chris. I am eager for your new stuff!

Jackie

P.S. You got the title of the Harry Potter video wrong. It was supposed to be "I put on my robe and wizard hat." Considering you had the text log right there in front of you, you could have wrote in on a post-it or something so you could remember it correctly.

October 18, 2010 - 4:24pm

I will do your suggested videos from today, and I will have them uploaded as soon as possible. You do understand what I have been doing to get back on with a PC, and I am trying to sync my console with divx, so it can recognize .MOV format video files. And the older PC doesn't want to run even the install program for divx, because of missing .dll files and outdated crap like that. Meanwhile, I'm also still trying and trying and trying to get the newer PC booted up, but now it seems impossible, because it is going on well over 200 turn ons and turn offs and I'm still getting as far as the Windows XP loading screen and then FREEZE.

After the long day of tedious computer work, I calm myself down and get my blood flowing a bit by playing the games on my console, yes, but I AM sitting in front of the computer screen for hours and hours between a Freezing Modern Tower, and a Tower that is soooooooooooooooo freakin' slow, it is unbearable.

*sigh*

So, at least cut me the slack, since I am doing my best to even get the .MOV videos recognized by my console and trying to make a PC work in my house. Also, the older PC does not have an Ethernet port, and when using it I have to into the slow Dial-Up Phone Line and Modem.

I'll check in again later.

Stay Safe and Sweet.
I Love You.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
Christian.

October 18, 2010 - 4:54pm

Have you gotten any decent responses for your zordon ranger toys yet? Why don't you just sell some of your PS3 games instead of continuing to buy more? If you really wanted to get that replacement motherboard quickly, you know you could get the $80 or whatever pretty fast just by selling a handful of games you don't play anymore, instead of age-old toys that no one but a few collectors here and there might be interested in buying.

I just really don't want to go the rest of the month without seeing any videos when you and I both know you have an easy and quick way to fix this problem.

Jackie


October 19, 2010 - 3:34pm

Hey Chris! Thanks for the videos.[2] They were great! Although I think something got screwed up with the lighting in your pregnancy video, because all I can see of you is a silhouette. Will you please do that one again for me? I want to see that up tonight. Just redo it the same way you did it, but make sure the lights are all on so I can actually see you in full light the whole time.

So anyway, redo that, and then for tonight's official video I want you to do the Work out video! RICHARD SIMMONS style. Jumping jacks, twirling, kicking feet to the music of my favorite cardio soundtrack: ASS n TITTIES.
-For tomorrow's video (10/20), I want you to do the Sonichu Babies puppet show.
-For Thursday (10/21), I want a video of you playing House! As Daddy, Mommy (Jackie, me), and Reginald and Crystal. Dress up as each member of our family and state your roles to the camera while acting like the character. I want Reginald to be just a baby in it, too. A 2 year old. Please be accurate with your clothing, no cardboard or construction paper allowed.
-For Friday (10/22), I want you to do the tee pee video in your back yard. Like a fort, but it must be a tee pee. Smoke a peace pipe and offer it to the camera.
-For Saturday (10/23), I want the day in the life of Chris video. I want you to give me a tour of Charlottesville and describe your favorite destinations. I would love if you could interview locals, too. Along the way, you can talk about how life has been this past year and what you've been up to.. At the end of the vide I want you to say "At least my head's not a FUCKING ORANGE". This is in reference to Clyde tanning to much and being judgmental and uggers. PLEASE SAY THAT EXACT SENTENCE. BUT DO NOT mention who it's reference too. Just say ""At least my head's not a FUCKING ORANGE". Then smile at the camera and say bye byes!! :)

We'll talk more about what videos I want after that soon enough. Have you sold some of the PS3 games you don't play anymore yet? You could get rid of Modnation Racers (especially since you bought two copies of the exact same game!), and Little Big Planet, and that Flipnote game for your DS; I know you haven't touched any of those games in months. Because I really miss talking to you on IM, and I want to talk to you again soon - I hope you miss talking to me enough to get rid of some old games that are just sitting on your shelf. I mean, those Zordon Ranger toys probably won't get you any money. I'm just venturing a guess that you haven't received any worthwhile offers on them yet, right?

Well, I look forward to seeing the new videos!

Jackie

P.S. From now on, you really need to have the videos up by midnight each night. Close to half of the videos you've posted "on time" this month were well into the morning hours of the next day. (And that's not counting when you decided to get lax on the contest because you didn't want to replace your computer's motherboard.) So I look forward to seeing those videos before I go to bed tonight!!

October 19, 2010 - 3:44pm

The XP Tower finally gave in and booted up fully last night. I didn't want to jinx it last night; reaching you on AIM then the computer freezes up again, not to be booted up again until after triple-digit amount of ons and offs, so I decided to give it 24 hours; leave it on and see if it freezes up again. No Freeze. :) So, if you are available tonight, I will log in at about 8:30 and we can make up for lost time.

Plus, in case you haven't seen them yet, I've uploaded the bunch of videos last night.[2] I decided for in the meantime, the PC will serve to convert the files to .mp4, until when the console is capable of recognizing and playing .MOV files in an upgrade or something, and I will upload the videos from the console.

And just to inform you, I think I've told you about me winning a $50 GameStop gift card from a Guitar Hero Blood Drive Tournament a few months ago; I finally got the gift card yesterday, and with a 3-for-2 Preowned game coupon, I got three games and a $20 PSN card. I understand that what I am saying in this paragraph is not all that thrilling, but I tell you, because I am continuing my being direct and honest with you.

I have given it thought, and I will sell some more games and DVDs for cash. And I will do this through eBay. I will also move the zords from craigslist to eBay; I figure this way there will be less chance of anyone coming up with fake offers over the phone, and I can enforce Immediate Payment, so I will definitely get the money. And also, with the games, I can sell them for current price value, instead of getting considerable chump change at a pawn shop.

With that, I will continue with the plans for saving up for the new computer.

I'll TTYTonight. Stay Safe and Sweet. I Love You.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO <3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
Christian.

October 19, 2010 - 3:54pm

Ooh, great!! I can't wait to talk to you tonight!!

XOXO

Jackie

October 20, 2010 - 7:19pm

Hey, Jackie. I have the Sonichu Abies puppet show recorded, but the computer froze up again last night after midnight. I'm still working on getting it booted up again; I took a break for some dinner, and I thought I'd send you the update. If I am unable to get it booted up again before tomorrow night, I will let you in an e-mail between 6 and 7'30 pm; if I do not send you an e=mail, that will signal that I got the computer booted up again, and I will be able to make the AIM tomorrow night.

I gtg turn on ad off some more. I'll TTYL.
Stay Safe and Sweet,
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO <3<3<3<3<3<3<3
Christian

October 20, 2010 - 7:27pm

Well, if you can't get it up, I guess you can't get it up. Put the video up as soon as you are able, though, I am really looking forward to seeing it!

Ooh, you know what you could do for me in the meantime? Why don't you send me the completed replacement pages for the end of Sonichu 10? It's been a few weeks since you said you would put those together, I bet they're really good! Send those to me tonight, okay sweetie??

XOXO

Jackie

October 21, 2010 - 5:41pm

The PC is still being stubborn with me now; more hours turning it on and off gone. I won't be able to make the chat tonight. I'm sorry, Sweetheart.

I'll let you know when I get it up again.

Stay Safe and Sweet.
I Love You, Jackie,
Christian.

October 21, 2010 - 6:50pm

Well, if you would just sell some of your PS3 games already, you could replace that computer and you could actually talk to each other. Or the PS3 itself. You said that buying it was just a spur-of-the-moment impulse, but that doesn't explain why you haven't gotten rid of it in the months since then.

What about the replacement pages for the end of Sonichu 10? I asked you to send them to me yesterday, why didn't you do so? At least then I'd have SOMETHING to do while you play your PS3.

Jackie

October 22, 2010 - 8:37pm

Chris, were you planning to respond to me any time soon?

Jackie

October 22, 10:13pm

I'm sorry for not typing you sooner, but I have been busy trying to get the PC booted up again this afternoon; three hours. And I have sorted put a number of games and DVDs to sell at Plan 9 tomorrow. And I hd to go in the opposite direction to my local Wal-Mart for tea and groceries. Also, I found a good HP C tower without a monitor, and With 640 GB HDD memory for 500. In addition to my selling and saving plan, I have informed my mom about the computer, and she agrees with me on getting it, and she has talked to pop about it. They will plan on their financial half as well, and we'll get the new computer as shortly soon as possible. I have continued to record the videos for you daily; after they're uploaded, esecially your requested ones from this week, I think you will be pleased. Also, please do not change my mnd on the planned video for Oct. 31; I'll dress up like a ghost and play the "Ghostbusters" song on Rock Band. I also have an idea for pretending to be jigsaw's dummy, and addressing myself in a scenario where I was put into one of his traps. Even imagining it, hearing my name spoken by Jigsaw's voice spooks me some. "Hello, Christian Chandler, I want to play a game." Can you imagine?

Seriously, though, i am doing my best to gather the money for the new computer as swiftly as possible. And I am doing the videos for you with full efforts.

I Love You, and I Care a Lot about you a Lot, Jacklyn Romy.

TTYL; Stay Safe and Sweet,
Christian.

References

  1. Replacing the hard drive from a Windows Me system with one from a Windows XP system would make it an XP system. They're not incompatible, they're mutually exclusive.
  2. 2.0 2.1 Chris had uploaded five videos since the last correspondence: Pregnant Act, Breast Cancer Awareness, Gilligan Be or Not, Vitameatavegamin, and A Public Announcement for Congress
Jackie E-mails 17 Jackie E-mails Jackie E-mails 19