Chris emails 2007

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This set of emails details Chris's interactions with Megan, the PaRappa contest adventure, and the moment his life began its tumble down a bottomless pit of failure--the discovery of the Encyclopedia Dramatica article.

February

−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: CWCSonichu@aol.com
To: Virginia_Sanford@ccpsnet.net
Sent: Wed, 21 Feb 2007 3:32:50 PM Eastern Standard Time
Subject: Re: Hello

Hey, Mrs. Sanford (or should I say Ginny or Virginia ), I am delighted to hear from you as well. And It is also good to know that you are still residing at that address. The DVD is under production, to be completed a few days after February 24, 2007 (my 25th Birthday...Yay).

You may be able to help me in a portion of it now; there will be a Slideshow (projected from my PlayStation Portable) featuring not only pics of me growing up, but the friends, teachers and relatives I've known and remembered (either from heart, like yourself, as well as yearbook signatures). Anyway, do you remember from the ol' class, Sarah and Micha (the blonde girl with glasses, and the slow-talking african american who Ms. Eckel told over and over to get his dad to teach him how to shave)? I remembered both of them from heart, but unfortunately I don't remember their last names, so it's harder to find them in the yearbooks; could you tell me their last names, please?

As for what had happened during PVCC, in a nutshell; about Mid-Summer, 2003, I've realize upon revolation that I needed a girl friend to make into a Sweetheart from the Ground-Up, so with a sign (which I've later realized that it made me look slow-minded; the "R" Word), I've started my Enduring Love Quest. The Dean of Student Serveces, Mary Lee Walsh came out and tore my sign up right in front of me, and said, "You're not gonna get a Girlfriend this way or any way." That *&^%$ SHATTERED MY HEART AND MURDERED MY SOUL. And it wasn't just her, the Policemen Imposters in Brown, White and Red, AKA The Jerkops (Blue and Black ARE the TRUE POLICE SOLDIERS) also seriously indented the impression that "Virgina is for Virgins, NOT Lovers".

But it has a happy ending; in Mid-2005, when I've started playing the Yu-Gi-Oh TCG, I met this girl who upon numerous conversations, art-sharing and secret confidence, I've grown fond of, and my Heart and Soul Recovered from the Serious Emotional and Physical Pain I've endured. Although she's not intrested in a serious relationship, I still am fond of her, and I'm hoping that she may have a change of heart.

You may learn more about what had happened to me from the Sub-Episodes in my "Sonichu" Comic Book, which I have the legable images uploaded onto my CWC's Sonichu Site!; those Sub-Episodes are based on my Real-Life Events. *sigh

Well, that's about it for now; I hope you do well as well. And I will make that DVD copy for you after I've finalized the master copy. Please tell the remaing faculty who are still working at Providence that I wish them the best as well. I still remember Mrs. Rogers (my ol' computer teacher) when she played as Woodstock in the 1996 "Snoopy" play; that was just fun and cute. :)

Take care;
Christian Weston Chandler, A.K.A. (nickname) Chris Chan.

July

−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: Susan Hannifan <SHANNIFAN@pvcc.edu>
To: cwcsonichu@aol.com
Sent: Mon, 23 Jul 2007 10:48 pm
Subject: RE: Hey, Susan, I have a small favor...

Wow! Congratulations Christian.

Yes I'll be sure to go to the web site to vote.

Best wishes.

Susan Hannifan
Disability Services Counselor
Piedmont Virginia Community College
501 College Drive
Charlottesville, Virginia 22902
434-961-5281
Fax: 434-961-5251


From: cwcsonichu@aol.com [1]

Sent: Friday, July 20, 2007 11:07 PM

To: Susan Hannifan

Subject: Hey, Susan, I have a small favor...

I hope you're doing well.

Anyhoo, I have previously submitted a video for Playstation's PaRappea the Rapper contest, and I am currently among the Top 10 Contestants. If I win the Grand Prize, I can take my Sweet Friend with me to the Penny Arcade Expo in Seattle, WA.

Please go to the (http://www.us.playstation.com/vote/parappatherapper/default.aspx) Playstation Website's Voting Page, and Vote for me; I'm the Lucky 7th Video (the one with the Blue Guitar).

Thank you, and I hope you all are still doing well. :)

Take care;

Christian W. Chandler.

August

−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: CWCSonichu@aol.com
To: community_support@directpartners.com
Sent: Fri, 3 Aug 2007 8:20:20 PM Eastern Daylight Time
Subject: To Nathen;

In addition to my message on your machine...

I REALLY WANTED THAT TRIP SO I COULD HAVE A CHANCE TO IMPRESS MY SWEETEST MEGAN AND POSSIBLY FULFILL MY DREAM OF GETTING MARRIED AND SOON HAVE A DAUGHTER NAMED CRYSTAL. YET NOW I, A FRUSTRATED HIGH-FUNCTIONALLY AUTISTIC 25-YEAR OLD VIRGIN, HAVE BEEN BALLZ-BROKEN LIKE I HAVE THROUGH A BIG CHUNK OF MY LIFE IN AMERICA'S FAVORITE GAME, "KICK THE AUTISTIC!" *sigh*

I had my fantasies of having fun with Megan, taking her to a really extravagent destination (I am not rich), taking a long-wanted tour of the Nintendo of America company tour, with her, playing Guitar Hero against the guy in the PaRappa costume, jamming with Megan in the hotel room and possibly our first time in the bed... *sigh*

Life can be soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo unfair and f***ing corrupt.

But I digress; TAKE THE A-CAPELLA RULE TO THE MAX on those THREE out of ten videos.

Take care;
Christian Weston Chandler. (:_(


−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: CWCSonichu@aol.com
To: community_support@directpartners.com
Sent: Sat, 4 Aug 2007 7:23:20 PM Eastern Daylight Time
Subject: To Nathen

Nathen, I have sent the following message to the community support at the Playstation Website, and the webmaster. I have also called Playstation support to directly input my complaint. So, I thought I would send it to you as well.

I DO NOT BELIEVE Adamstackhouse should be the winner of the PaRappa the Rapper Chop Chop Master Onion Contest, and there are a few others among the TOP TEN who all have VIOLATED THE POSTED OFFICIAL RULES. Please allow me to describe the violations as I rewatch the saved videos from my PSP, and I quote the Official Rules at http://www.us.playstation.com/EP/Promotions/283/Rules.html.

"The performance must be a cappella (meaning without music), and it must be one of the three (3) songs that are provided on the contest entry page. The lyrics must be the same lyrics used in the game. Changing the lyrics will result in disqualification. Please do not include other people in your video as this will also result in disqualification."

And if you Don't believe me, you should watch the TEN videos again for yourselves. *The bolded and underlined names are the names of the individuals who have violated the Officials Rules, and the BOLDED details are the obvious violations.

Video 1: adamstackhouse- IT HAS MUSIC - He has his SISTER IN THE VIDEO WITH HIM.
Video 2: ajbrewer- Nothing wrong here; no music, no lyric change, and he's all alone. :)
Video 3: aprelewsky- IT HAS MUSIC - He has a DUDE IN THE VIDEO WITH HIM.
Video 4: Billjones- This one is cool; no music, no lyric change, and although it looks like there are two guys in the video, upon closer inspection, they are both the same dude. :)
Video 5: brudell- He has his DUDEFRIEND IN THE VIDEO WITH HIM.
Video 6: chrisadams- Although it is high on volume and echoful, he is all alone in the video, no music, and he is quoting the lyrics from his printed sheet. :)
Video 7: CWCSonichu *My Video*- Granted, I did start and end the video with an introduction and Guitar Hero ending, and that was only a photo of me and my friend, Megan; the rules do not state anything about photos. I had the printed lyrics taped to the tripod holding the camera, and I did not change any of the lyrics of Chop Chop Master Onion; that was why I was leaning forward at times in the video. And, obviously, I had no music during the song. :)
Video 8: DSiferd- This is okay; no music, good lyric match, and like in Billjone's video; the leaf guy and driver are both the same guy. :)
Video 9: scotteichmer- Although it was too close to his face, there was no music, he matched the lyrics (with a "That's it" at the end), and a stuffed monkey does not qualify as a person. :)
Video 10: suryabuchwald- IT HAS MUSIC, and it sounds more like the theme to Super Mario Bros than Chop Chop Master Onion. And I will note that upon close inspection, the three guys are the same dude.

I understand that it's too late to hold another election, but I suggest that you award the Grand Prize to the highest voted among the SIX Qualified Videos.

Thank you for your time, and please personally reply to this E-Mail As Soon As Possible, or call me at my home phone at (434)-990-0198.

Sincerely,
Mr. Christian Weston Chandler - Ruckersville, Virginia.


−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: cwcsonichu@aol.com
To: community_support@directpartners.com
Sent: Wed, 8 Aug 2007 11:14 am
Subject: PS

I was solely depressed earlier when I called, because my Sweet Megan went AWOL. Justice will still be done, sworn on my Autism. I will still accept the prizes.


−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: webmaster@playstation.sony.com
To: Christian Chandler <CWCSonichu@aol.com>
Sent: Fri, 10 Aug 2007 2:48 am
Subject: Re: Website Questions or Issues: General Question

Hi Christian,

Thank you for writing us.

We value your input and appreciate you bringing this to our attention. Please rest assured that we will convey your feedback to Sony Computer Entertainment America's ("SCEA") appropriate management.

If you have further questions regarding this message, please refer to your email case number:4763303.

Jan
Multimedia Representative
Sony Computer Entertainment America
Consumer Services Department

Additional Support Resources
−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−
PlayStation.com Knowledge Base: Browse through hundreds of helpful FAQ articles at our Knowledge Base at PlayStation.com. To begin, please click on http://playstation.custhelp.com

PlayStation.com Support Page: You will find helpful content divided by our PlayStation(R) product lines. Please visit http://www.us.playstation.com/Support and select the PlayStation product of your choice to learn more.


Original Message Follows:
−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−

Consumer Name: Christian Chandler
Consumer Email: CWCSonichu@aol.com

Message from Consumer:
I DO NOT BELIEVE Adamstackhouse should be the winner of the PaRappa the Rapper Chop Chop Master Onion Contest, and there are a few others among the TOP TEN who all have VIOLATED THE POSTED OFFICIAL RULES. Please allow me to describe the violations as I rewatch the saved videos from my PSP, and I quote the Official Rules at http://www.us.playstation.com/EP/Promotions/283/Rules.html.

"The performance must be a cappella (meaning without music), and it must be one of the three (3) songs that are provided on the contest entry page. The lyrics must be the same lyrics used in the game. Changing the lyrics will result in disqualification. Please do not include other people in your video as this will also result in disqualification."

And if you Don't believe me, you should watch the TEN videos again for yourselves. *The bolded and underlined names are the names of the individuals who have violated the Officials Rules, and the BOLDED details are the obvious violations.

Video 1: adamstackhouse- IT HAS MUSIC - He has his SISTER IN THE VIDEO WITH HIM.
Video 2: ajbrewer- Nothing wrong here; no music, no lyric change, and he's all alone. :)
Video 3: aprelewsky- IT HAS MUSIC - He has a DUDE IN THE VIDEO WITH HIM.
Video 4: Billjones- This one is cool; no music, no lyric change, and although it looks like there
are two guys in the video, upon closer inspection, they are both the same dude. :)
Video 5: brudell- He has his DUDEFRIEND IN THE VIDEO WITH HIM.
Video 6: chrisadams- Although it is high on volume and echoful, he is all alone in the video, no music, and he is quoting the lyrics from his printed sheet. :)
Video 7: CWCSonichu *My Video*- Granted, I did start and end the video with an introduction and Guitar Hero ending, and that was only a photo of me and my friend, Megan; the rules do not state anything about photos. I had the printed lyrics taped to the tripod holding the camera, and I did not change any of the lyrics of Chop Chop Master Onion; that was why I was leaning forward at times in the video. And, obviously, I had no music during the song. :)
Video 8: DSiferd- This is okay; no music, good lyric match, and like in Billjone's video; the leaf guy and driver are both the same guy. :)
Video 9: scotteichmer- Although it was too close to his face, there was no music, he matched the lyrics (with a "That's it" at the end), and a stuffed monkey does not qualify as a person. :)
Video 10: suryabuchwald- IT HAS MUSIC, and it sounds more like the theme to Super Mario Bros than Chop Chop Master Onion. And I will note that upon close inspection, the three guys are the same dude.

I understand that it's too late to hold another election, but I suggest that you award the Grand Prize to the highest voted among the SIX Qualified Videos.

Thank you for your time, and please personally reply to this E-Mail As Soon As Possible, or call me at my home phone at (434)-990-0198.

Sincerely,
Mr. Christian Weston Chandler - Ruckersville, Virginia.


November

The fanart in question (with Chris's classic reply))

−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: Samuel Birrell <el_birrell2@yahoo.co.uk>
To: CWCSonichu@aol.com
Sent: Mon, 5 Nov 2007 7:28 am
Subject: I have a warning for you dude.

Normally I don't care for what my peers at 4chan.org do. but I bring you some news the people over at /v/ (aka the video game board) are making fun of you and made the http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/Chris-chan site, which you already know, but I left them to it as I couldn't care less what they did but now they have hit a new low and one is planning of pretending to be girl in hopes of getting you to send nude pictures to them. As I said normally I dont care what Anon does but I find this sad and immature and so I feel I must give you a heads up on anonymous's plans to ridicule you on the interwebs..

also if you are going to quote any of this I'd much appreciate you hide my Identity (email address etc)


From: Anna McLerran <forgotwhatiknew@gmail.com>
To: CWCSonichu@aol.com <CWCSonichu@aol.com>
Subject: Re: Hey, Anna
Date: Mon, 5 Nov 2007 3:54 pm

Christian,
I am so sorry. That website is the most cruel, inhuman attempt at "humor" I have ever seen. It makes me sick to my stomach, what they have written about you. If you can find out who they are, sue them for defamation of character. I intend to take action against them as well. Please keep me posted on your progress. I am heartsick for the pain they've caused you.
Anna


−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: CWCSonichu@aol.com
To: forgotwhatiknew@gmail.com
Sent: Mon, 5 Nov 2007 2:21:23 PM Eastern Standard Time
Subject: Hey, Anna

I have been recovering from the worst weekend of my life. In a nutshell, explicit fan art freaked me out, then someone else put a copyright symbol on their fan art (giving the impression of Sonichu being theirs), I responded to both offenses appropriately, then I Googled "Sonichu", and I found a page that deficated on my person and character. And the second photo-jpg on there was actually taken at The Game Place last Friday, with me thinkin' the dude was taking a pic of the child I was playing Pokemon TCG with. I had asked the guys at The Game Place to check their servaliance camera footage of the timeframe, so I could possibly learn the identity of the person who took that photo. But the guys could not get it to work; they have to talk to their boss-type person. One of them put things in perspective for me, I calmed down for a while. Then my mother comes in during my peace with a lecture of doing more things around the house; I waited for her to finish, then I bursted out the events in a mouth-running-faster-than-my-brain fashion. Now, she is possibly on a warpath against this dude. A hacking terrorist group, Anonymous, and 4Chan are somehow involved in that page as well.

Chris-chan - Encyclopedia Dramatica

*sigh*

I'm sorry; I'm still recovering from the worst weekend of my life. I'll get back to you with more positive information soon.

Take care;
Chris Chan.


−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: CWCSonichu@aol.com
To: forgotwhatiknew@gmail.com
Sent: Mon, 5 Nov 2007 9:30:58 PM Eastern Standard Time
Subject: Thank you, Anna

But I'm certain that it's just some dude with nothing better to do with his time. He'll probably get tired of doing anything after a week or two, if I do not respond harshly or post anything new. I told my mother she can do whatever she wanted on that, just be careful. My only concern about that is finding out who took that photo pic last Friday and why. Other than that, I'm recovering with the intent of just moving on with my life.

Okay, now for the good news. Have you ever met Joshua Martinez? He's an ol' buddy of mine; we went to JMU during our childhood for Special Education classes. He carpooled with me and my father in his car. While in Harrisonburg, we would have lunch at Country Cookin', and have fun at the park (can't remember the name) that used to have an empty airplane. He is a mix of American and Spanish.

Also, Joshua has cousins who are a band in Hollywood, so Josh has met stars such as Britney Spears, Jessica Alba (Josh told me about Jessie being a mix of American and Spanish), and others. Like I said, Joshua is popular; he's got the looks and the height (about 6'2").

After running to him at McDonalds at Forest Lakes a few weeks ago, he's kept in touch with me more than I would have after that day, and we've caught up in more or less the current events in our lives. He has become VERY Popular with the ladies, I tell you what. :D He's also hooked a few of his male acquaintances with a good gal each. I am no different.

Also, recently, Joshua received an extra Nintendo Wii console from a friend, so he sold it to me for a solid $240 (I saved about 22.49 in comparison to buying at a store after tax).

Megan broke up my emotions for her after the PaRappa contest, but we're still ONLY Friends. After that e-mail, I've moved on, back to the coal mines (so to speak). Granted that I have had absolutely no luck in having ANY women come to me while I hung out at the Alderman Library up to now. Joshua found a gal who WAS interested in me, after reading about me in my MySpace profile at least.

Her name is Lori Lopez. I chatted with her through AOL Instant Message last night... <3<3<3 She was really sweet, and not only did I have a great time getting to know her, but... *blush* I got turned on. I know that she works (at a car lot, I think), she is 23, brunette, brown eyes, and she is a mix of American and Spanish. If you've watched the movie, "Into The Blue," the starring woman, Jessica Alba is an American/Spanish mix as well.
=C
2
I'm keeping the Sweetheart Search details on my profile until I know for certain that Lori is really to be my Sweetheart. :)

I gtg; my cell phone number is still the same, so feel free to call me.

Take care;
Chris Chan.


−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: Matthew Kelly <mkelly641@hotmail.co.uk>
To: cwcsonichu@aol.com
Sent: Tue, 6 Nov 2007 8:16 pm
Subject: Cease and desist

Mr. Chandler,

Matthew Kelly's TRUE and ORIGINAL Sonichu

Through anonymous sources, it has been made aware to me that you have established a fandom of sorts revolving around my character 'Sonichu'. As the proud writer/artist of the cult 'Sonichu' comic series - having recently enjoyed its fifth year since professional publication through the UK branch of Archie Comics after rough origins of self-publication starting in 1998, I am excitedly exploring the possibility of bringing the series to North American audiences - I am always one to help and provide information towards other aspiring artists. However, having seen the extent to which you have blatantly plagiarized my work, I feel it is necessary for me to step in. I ask you to view the sample image I have submitted, the cover for Sonichu #4 - clearly used as the exact template for the cover page of so-called CWC Comic's fourth issue of 'Sonichu'. Having spent much time and effort with the creation of characters such as Mary Lee Scott and Christopher Chandley, you can imagine my surprize upon discovering that not only had they been copied in their entirety, but the situations and conflicts they encounter had been directly stolen as well. Christopher's struggles to acquire a soul mate is the glue that has held my series together, and it is a serious blow to me to discover that someone has had the disrespect to use it for their own personal gain without any form of acknowledgment or citation. Perhaps even worse is the, frankly, childlike way you have gone about copying my work page-for-page. The sheer lack of artistic effort on your part is a true slap in the face, one that leaves me convinced that your plagiarism was done with the expressed intent to spite my efforts to make an honest living and support my girlfriend.

It is for these reasons, and the obvious financial liabilities on the part of Archie Comics UK, that I send you a cease and desist notice on ANY AND ALL physical or intellectual property relating to the Sonichu franchise, including the maintenance of your website under its current incarnation as 'CWC's Sonichu Site'. You are expected to remove all offending materials from all online sources with which you are in charge of within one week of November 6, 2007. Failure to comply with these demands will result in talks with the webmasters of Tripod and of Myspace to have aforementioned materials removed forcefully. Thank you for your compliance.

-Matthew David Kelly

December

−−−−−Original Message−−−−−
From: CWCSonichu@aol.com
To: sweet_angelvanessa162@yahoo.com
Sent: Mon, 31 Dec 2007 12:12:17 AM Eastern Standard Time
Subject: I've finished my freestyle heartfelt poem

So, here it is. Please share it with Megan and the Jessicas and the others.

For My True Love, I Would…
A message from what’s left of my heart and soul,
by Christian Weston Chandler, December 30, 2007

For my true love, I'd treat her tenderly, sweetly, gently...like a summer breeze. I'd caress her skin gently with my strong fingers. I'd take her to eat and provide for her to my ability. I'd start small at McDonalds, then let it get better in due time. When the mood is right, I'd wisk her in my arms, and lift her up in sweet gentleness. I would share with her the BEST kiss of my life, and hopefully hers, since it would be the first of my life. I would do for her as much as I am able to in getting her the she desires. Every day, I would try to make her smile with a jest, a spark, or a tender massage. If she is willing to allow the pleasure, I’d lay her down caress her gently tickle her fancy; have her tickle my fancy, and give it to her with the learned lonely experience I’ve endured. But I digress on that. Most importantly, I would hang on to her every word of her life tales, er feelings, her troubled times, and I’d share my condolences accordingly. And I can hope she would be willing to do the same for me. I am nothing without this woman, so I hope and pray that she will stay to love me for me, as I would stay with her for her. “I LOVE YOU” would be shared daily with a French side dish. J I am her soldier, to do for her as she sees fit.