Sonichu 9

The Saga Continues...

Sonichu 9 is the tenth issue of Christian's Sonichu comic book. On the 30th of March, 2009, the first 3 uncolored pages were released. Then, on Easter Sunday 2009, Chris released the entire episode 19, but it is only partially colored. As of this article's last update, Sonichu 9 is still incomplete.

Episode 19: Date Ed (Even Though the Idea Sounds Dated)

The first story shows various characters attending "Dating Education" classes. Punchy is sitting the college version and intends to ace it, stating his intention to make Angelica his within a few months. Zapina is attending the high-school level version of the classes. New characters are introduced as class members. The teacher Ms. Jackaras, who is a representation of possible troll Sarah Jackson, pairs each male student with a female student. One boy named "Reginald" is jealous of Punchy for being paired up with the girl he likes named Layla. Wild is paired with Simonla. Some South Park knock offs are paired together. Ivy (after Julie was written out, see BlueSpike PSN Chat 2), is paired with someone but shows no interest in him because she and Chris had the same dream where God/Jesus show up and explain that Chris and Ivy are meant to be together. Chris is still in the void at this point and they have never actually met; making this more absurd. Punchy forgets about Angelica because he is now in love with Layla and Angelica hooks up with Reginald at the end. Wild and Simonla fall in love as well. Wild shows Simonla his house which appears to have a vibrating bed. Chris then shows us his proud blueprints for Simonla's house. At the end of the episode, Rita Jackaras informs the class that her sister is dead so she has to substitute for them. They take a test and some boy named Clyde has the lowest score. Chris shows us the content of the test and insists that we email him our answers so he can grade them personally. The test is completely fucking retarded.

Speculation on Possible Content

SPOILER ALERT: It's gonna suck.

Chris appears to be building to some final, climactic battle between his beloved Hedgehog Pokemon characters, and the evil cockblocker villains, led by Mary Lee Walsh and Count Graduon. Chris stated in the final page of Sonichu #8 that he would be returning from the time void in #9, and his preview of #10 indeed shows him back in action, so this seems pretty likely.

Presumably, Chris's return would mean that the seven Sonichu Balls would be reunited, enabling Magi-Chan to rescue Crystal from the Dark Mirror. This is assuming, of course, that Christian even remembers to resolve that little plotline, since Crystal got trapped in the damn mirror over two and a half years ago.

On the front cover, Chris announces that he will be including a corrected version of timmys1984's Sonichu Fan Promo, a short series of 3D films that showed Sonichu zapping through town and defeating enemies. It is unclear if this section will just be an addition, or if Chris wil actually canonise the promos. It is however sure that Chris will turn it to shit.

If Sonichu #8 is any indication, expect to see a lot of gross PDA and condom discussions among the cast.

Chris has described upcoming issues as the "season finale", which demonstrates how much he's confused his comic with a television series. Every issue thus far has been the first "season", which is now entering its fifth year without a conclusion. He's also stated that he plans to step down as mayor of CWCville in the comic, and assume a lesser role in the series. Given that the entire series has devolved into a warped autobiography, this seems like an empty promise.

Comic delay

Like the poor worker blames his tools, Chris is currently threatening to stop drawing comics unless the slanderous trolls lay off his family and stop sending letters to his house. It is likely he is doing this because he wants to blame his lack of ideas on everyone but himself. As his comics are largely based on his real-life adventures, of which there have been a noticeable lack of lately, it is unlikely the comic will see a release anytime soon.