Difference between revisions of "So Need a Cute Girl"

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{{quote|Such words were never more true, but if I didn't feel the sadness, [[So Lonesome|lonliness]] [sic] or torture in my heart from after my first encounter with that [[Mary Lee Walsh|Witch Bitch]], I might be a fuckin' weak sap, instead of the [[Semen|SALTY]], [[Chris and anger|AGGRESSIVE]], and [[Clyde Cash|TRULY SWEET TO THE LADIES]] and [[Homos|NOT TO MOST]] [[JERKS|MEN]] type of MAN that I AM.|[[Chris]] commenting on "So Need a Cute Girl," 11 [[November 2007]] [[List of Chris's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED edit]].<ref name="ed">[http://web.archive.org/web/20091223054201/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php?title=Chris-chan&diff=1997316018&oldid=1997315821 Encyclopedia Dramatica (Wayback Machine), as of 12/23/2009]</ref>}}
{{quote|Such words were never more true, but if I didn't feel the sadness, [[So Lonesome|lonliness]] [sic] or torture in my heart from after my first encounter with that [[Mary Lee Walsh|Witch Bitch]], I might be a fuckin' weak sap, instead of the [[Semen|SALTY]], [[Chris and anger|AGGRESSIVE]], and [[Clyde Cash|TRULY SWEET TO THE LADIES]] and [[Homos|NOT TO MOST]] [[JERKS|MEN]] type of MAN that I AM.|[[Chris]] commenting on "So Need a Cute Girl," 11 [[November 2007]] [[List of Chris's edits to Encyclopedia Dramatica|ED edit]].<ref name="ed">[http://web.archive.org/web/20091223054201/http://encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php?title=Chris-chan&diff=1997316018&oldid=1997315821 Encyclopedia Dramatica (Wayback Machine), as of 12/23/2009]</ref>}}


'''"So Need a Cute Girl"''' is the first track off of [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]]'s [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|eponymous debut album]]. It is sung over a live version of "[[wikipedia:I Want It That Way|I Want It That Way]]" by the [[wikipedia:Backstreet Boys|Backstreet Boys]] on their 2000 '''Into the Millennium Tour'''.<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_KRcrMD5uU&t=5890s</ref> [[Chris]] has described it in an [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] edit as his "[[Love Quest|sweetheart search]] theme song."<ref name="ed"/> It is arguably his greatest hit, and certainly the Hedgehog Boys song Chris goes back to most often; as well as the performances listed below, impromptu features appear in a number of his videos.
'''"So Need a Cute Girl"''' is the first track off of [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys]]'s [[Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)|eponymous debut album]]. It is sung over a live version of "{{w|I Want It That Way}}" by the {{w|Backstreet Boys}} on their 2000 '''Into the Millennium Tour'''.<ref>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_KRcrMD5uU&t=5890s</ref> [[Chris]] has described it in an [[Encyclopedia Dramatica]] edit as his "[[Love Quest|sweetheart search]] theme song."<ref name="ed"/> It is arguably his greatest hit, and certainly the Hedgehog Boys song Chris goes back to most often; as well as the performances listed below, impromptu features appear in a number of his videos.


Bizarrely enough, since [[November 2013]] the song has been available for download for 89 cents on Amazon's MP3 store. As Chris has never mentioned this, it is very likely a [[troll]] put it up there and is making money off of Chris's work.
Bizarrely enough, since [[November 2013]] the song has been available for download for 89 cents on Amazon's MP3 store. As Chris has never mentioned this, it is very likely a [[Carpetbaggers|carpetbagger]] put it up there to make money off of it without his permission.


In 2016, Chris made a [[Singing an ol' diddy|remake]] of the song for the Paid Video Requests, replacing the words "I have a boyfriend" with "I'm already taken" to include [[tomgirl|lesbians]]. In a [[2017]] retrospective, Chris admitted that hearing his old song made him cringe, also misidentifying the original artist behind the song as [[wikipedia:*NSYNC|*NSYNC]] instead of the Backstreet Boys.<ref>[[September 2017 Facebook posts#Opinion on Sachumo's CWC Documentary|"And then, I heard the old song I sang, that makes me cringe now, in tune to "I Want It That Way" from N*Sync..."]]</ref>
In 2016, Chris made a [[Singing an ol' diddy|remake]] of the song for the Paid Video Requests, replacing the words "I have a boyfriend" with "I'm already taken" to include [[tomgirl|lesbians]]. In a [[2017]] retrospective, Chris admitted that hearing his old song made him cringe, also misidentifying the original artist behind the song as {{w|*NSYNC}} instead of the Backstreet Boys.<ref>[[September 2017 Facebook posts#Opinion on Sachumo's CWC Documentary|"And then, I heard the old song I sang, that makes me cringe now, in tune to "I Want It That Way" from N*Sync..."]]</ref>


==Song==
==Song==
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I'm sitting here sad and lonely!<br>
I'm sitting here sad and lonely!<br>


Without a [[Destruction Of Chris's House|fire]],<br>
Without a [[2014 house fire|fire]],<br>
But a desire<br>
But a desire<br>
To ''not'' hear you say,<br>
To ''not'' hear you say,<br>
Line 155: Line 155:


{{Infobox/Fanvideo
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name          = So Need a Cute Girl - NEGATIVE XP
| name          = Negative XP - So Need A Cute Girl
| video          = {{#ev:youtube|xgl5E-glIe8}}
| video          = {{#ev:youtube|4uej-Z9YDrk}}
| stardate      = 21 [[February 2023]]
| stardate      = 30 [[July 2019]]
| maker          = [https://soundcloud.com/negativexp Negative XP]
| maker          = [https://soundcloud.com/negativexp Negative XP]
| subject        = So Need a Cute Girl
| subject        = So Need a Cute Girl
Line 183: Line 183:
| info          = Cover by Your Noble Truths, Art and editing by [https://youtube.com/c/JavaJake Java Jake]
| info          = Cover by Your Noble Truths, Art and editing by [https://youtube.com/c/JavaJake Java Jake]
}}
}}
{{Infobox/Fanvideo
| name          = So Need a Cute Girl - The Puzzyslayers (CHRIS CHAN COVER)
| video          = {{#ev:youtube|gqwYEfksPfU}}
| stardate      = 28 [[September 2023]]
| maker          = The Puzzyslayers
| subject        = So Need a Cute Girl
| type          = Song Cover
| info          = Cover by the Puzzyslayers}}


== References ==
== References ==
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{{Music Videos}}
{{Music Videos}}
{{Love quest}}
{{Love quest}}
 
{{Articleofthenow}}
[[Category:Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)]]
[[Category:Christian and the Hedgehog Boys (album)]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos before 2007| 2004-12-24]]
[[Category:Chris-chan videos before 2007| 2004-12-24]]
[[Category:Music]]
[[Category:Music]]
[[Category:Music Videos]]
[[Category:Music Videos]]

Latest revision as of 03:50, 26 September 2024

“ Such words were never more true, but if I didn't feel the sadness, lonliness [sic] or torture in my heart from after my first encounter with that Witch Bitch, I might be a fuckin' weak sap, instead of the SALTY, AGGRESSIVE, and TRULY SWEET TO THE LADIES and NOT TO MOST MEN type of MAN that I AM. ”
Chris commenting on "So Need a Cute Girl," 11 November 2007 ED edit.[1]

"So Need a Cute Girl" is the first track off of Christian and the Hedgehog Boys's eponymous debut album. It is sung over a live version of "I Want It That Way" by the Backstreet Boys on their 2000 Into the Millennium Tour.[2] Chris has described it in an Encyclopedia Dramatica edit as his "sweetheart search theme song."[1] It is arguably his greatest hit, and certainly the Hedgehog Boys song Chris goes back to most often; as well as the performances listed below, impromptu features appear in a number of his videos.

Bizarrely enough, since November 2013 the song has been available for download for 89 cents on Amazon's MP3 store. As Chris has never mentioned this, it is very likely a carpetbagger put it up there to make money off of it without his permission.

In 2016, Chris made a remake of the song for the Paid Video Requests, replacing the words "I have a boyfriend" with "I'm already taken" to include lesbians. In a 2017 retrospective, Chris admitted that hearing his old song made him cringe, also misidentifying the original artist behind the song as *NSYNC instead of the Backstreet Boys.[3]

Song

"So Need a Cute Girl"
Click to load content
Direct link YouTube, archive
Stardate August 2003
Subject Matter MusicMusic Music, SexSex Sex, GalpalsGalpals Love Quest
Performance Style TragedyTragedy Noviophobia, RageRage Virgin with Rage, CrazyCrazy Crazy
Other AudioAudio Audio
OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos
previous
The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special 		next
All I Want For Christmas Is a Pretty Girlfriend

Lyrics

[sung over The Backstreet Boys' "I Want It That Way"]

Hey! Look at me!
I'm sitting here sad and lonely!

Without a fire,
But a desire
To not hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"

And I see da ladies walking
Along one by one,
And I never wanna hear,
"I have a boyfriend!"

Tell me why
I'm stuck as a virgin with rage!
Tell me why
I so need a cute girl my age!
Tell me why
I ain't ever wanna hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"

And I have no fire
But a desire
To not hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"

Tell me why
I'm stuck as a virgin with rage!
(Tell me why)
I so need a cute girl my age!
(Tell me why)
I ain't ever wanna hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"

Why do all of the jerks
Get all of the pretty girls? (Yeah!)
You may not notice,
But I want you to know
That I am a lonesome heart!

And I have no fire,
But a desire
To not, to not, to not
Heeeaaar…

Stuck as a virgin with rage!
So need a cute girl my age!
I never wanna hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"

Tell me why
I'm stuck as a virgin with rage!
(Tell me why)
I so need a cute girl my age!
(Tell me why)
I ain't ever wanna hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"

Tell me why
I'm stuck as a virgin with rage!
I so need a cute girl my age!
(Tell me why)
I ain’t ever wanna hear you say,
"I have a boyfriend!"

Never say it, now!

* In some versions of the song, "as a virgin with rage" is replaced by the alternative lyric "in a sad, lonely cage."

** In some versions of the song, "I ain't ever wanna hear you say, / I have a boyfriend" is replaced by the alternative lyric "I really mean it when I say, / I need a girlfriend."

** In a version of the lyrics posted by Chris in one of his ED edits, these lyrics are changed to "I mean it when I say, 'I NEED A SWEETHEART.'"[1]

** In more recent versions, he replaces "I have a boyfriend!" with "I'm already taken!"'"[1]

Music video

Main article: All I Want For Christmas is a Pretty Girlfriend

Live performance

So Need a Cute Girl, Live Performance
Click to load content
Direct link YouTube, archive
Stardate 12 July 2009
Subject Matter MusicMusic Music, SexSex Sex, GalpalsGalpals Love Quest, OtherUnknownIcon.png Noviophobia
Performance Style RageRage Virgin with Rage, CrazyCrazy Drunk
Shirt The RefereeRefereeshirt.PNG The Referee
Other LiveLive Live
OFFICIAL and HONEST CWC Videos
previous
So Need a Cute Girl, Music Video 		next
Harvey Birdman Commercial

On 12 July 2009, one of Chris's "friends" uploaded Christian and the Hedgehog Boys giving their first public performance (sans the Hedgehog Boys, though Chris probably imagined they were there in his head), with their song "So Need a Cute Girl." Perhaps in an attempt to come off as less creepy, Chris opts to use the "sad, lonely cage" lyrics instead of the "virgin with rage" one. Although his performance is predictably sleep-inducing, for the most part, Chris's added "flourish" at the very end of the video (in which, in an attempt to evoke Michael Jackson, he slaps his hand on grabs his crotch) makes for an unforgettable couple of seconds.

Transcript

Chris: [fervently slaps crotch at the end] LADIES, ALL HANDS ON ME. [There are no takers, just laughter]

Man: [bewildered] Oh-whoa-WHOOOOA there, buddy!! Whoa-ho, you got that on film!

Covers

So Need a Cute Girl, cover
Click to load content
Stardate 30 June 2009
Made By LiquidLiquid Liquid Chris
Subject Matter So Need a Cute Girl
Video Type Song Cover
Other Info Sonichu: The Animated Series response from the real Chris Chandler.
Main vocals by Liquid's brother, SimplySpoons/Jon D.
TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos


So Need a Cute Girl, cover
Click to load content
Stardate 4 January 2012
Made By GUWANGE
Subject Matter So Need a Cute Girl
Video Type Song Cover
Other Info From the album Trollsta's Paradise: A True and Honest Tribute to Christian & The Hedgehog Boys.
TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos


So Need a Cute Girl (Medley)
Click to load content
Stardate 11 June 2012
Made By GhostofBillRiley
Subject Matter So Need a Cute Girl
Video Type Song Cover
Other Info A medley of several covers mixed together with the original.
TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos


Negative XP - So Need A Cute Girl
Click to load content
Stardate 30 July 2019
Made By Negative XP
Subject Matter So Need a Cute Girl
Video Type Song Cover (Mirrored)
Other Info Cover made by Negative XP
TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos


christian and the hedgehog boys - so need a cute girl (glueboy cover)
Click to load content
Stardate 21 April 2021
Made By lil glueboy
Subject Matter So Need a Cute Girl
Video Type Song Cover
Other Info Usually in TikTok videos about Chris
TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos


So Need a Cute Girl Goes DEATH METAL - Your Noble Truths
Click to load content
Stardate 20 April 2022
Made By Your Noble Truths
Subject Matter So Need a Cute Girl
Video Type Song Cover
Other Info Cover by Your Noble Truths, Art and editing by Java Jake
TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos


So Need a Cute Girl - The Puzzyslayers (CHRIS CHAN COVER)
Click to load content
Stardate 28 September 2023
Made By The Puzzyslayers
Subject Matter So Need a Cute Girl
Video Type Song Cover
Other Info Cover by the Puzzyslayers
TRUE and HONEST Sonichu Fan Videos

References

  1. ↑ 1.0 1.1 1.2 1.3 Encyclopedia Dramatica (Wayback Machine), as of 12/23/2009
  2. ↑ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o_KRcrMD5uU&t=5890s
  3. ↑ "And then, I heard the old song I sang, that makes me cringe now, in tune to "I Want It That Way" from N*Sync..."

See also

⇐ Animal Crossing Documentary Chris's videos All I Want For Christmas Is a Pretty Girlfriend ⇒

v • d • e  
Christian and the Hedgehog Boys
Members
Christian & the Hedgehog Boys
COMEBACK!
Single
Related
Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :)

Regular DVD: Sonic Watch & Win Sweepstakes • "Song of Christian" • Mario Kart 64 Lego Raceway • Chris Chan in the PokéNews • The City of Cwicville Tour! • Animal Crossing Documentary • The 24th Wedding Anniversary Special • "So Need a Cute Girl" • "All I Want For Christmas Is a Pretty Girlfriend" • Harvey Birdman commercial • Pixelated PS3 • FUTURE MESSAGE • KCWC broadcast • CWC Slideshow Notes • Slideshow images
Director's Cut: ChandlerFamilyChristmas2004 • ChrisAfterChristmas2004

v • d • e  
Chris's music videos
1990s
2000s
"So Need a Cute Girl" / "All I Want for Christmas is a Pretty Girlfriend" • "Master Onion a la Mode" • Filmation's Ghostbusters Theme • "Never Gonna Give You Up" • "Heartbreaker" • "Holding Out for a Hero" • "Lovin' You" • "Jolly Holiday (I)" • "Jolly Holiday (II)" • "Single and Lonely" • "Fart Song" • "Bunny Hop" • "It's All Coming Back to Me Now" • "I Got a Fish" • "I Love the Nightlife" • "So Need A Cute Girl (II) (Live)" • "Don't Trust Any Homos Over There" • "OK2BGAY" • "OK2BGay (II)" • "Dare" • "Boyfriend" (I) • "More Than a Feeling" • "Sonic Boom" • "Don't Say You Love Me" • "Autumn Goodbye" • "The Touch" • "Smell Yo Dick" • KCWC Top 10 • "So Need a Cute Girl (III)" • "Respect" • "Old Time Rock and Roll" • Aerosmith medley • "A Whole New World" • "iPods Down and Listen Up" • "Juggalo Family"
2010s
"Mr. Plow" remix • "Boyfriend" (II) • "Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm" • "Step in Time" • "Don't Laugh at Me" • "A Day in the Life" • "Meet the Flintstones" • Hamlet song • "Everywhere You Look" • "Kajra Re" • "Ghostbusters" • "Gangsta's Paradise" • "Wrist, Wrist" • "Teenage Dream" • "Fuck the Pain Away" • "Walmart" • "Hello! Ma Baby" • "The Twelve Days of Christmas" • "Jungle Bells" • "Sleigh Ride" • "You're a Mean One, Mr. Trump" • "Yellow Submarine" • "Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Shake My Boobies" • "All of the Lights" • "So Need a Cute Girl (IIII)" • "Ascension Millennium" • "The Dream I Dreamed" • "Sorry (Not Sorry)" • "Remove Kebab" • "Love is Love" • "Walkin' Around the Van" • "All Star" • "All Star (II)" • "You Will Be Found" • "You've Been Trolled"
2020s

v • d • e  
Chris's Love Quest
Candidates (List)
Sarah Hammer ♥ Tiffany Robinson ♥ Natasha Turner ♥ Laura Dorazio ♥ Kellie Andes ♥ Tiffany Gowen ♥ Molly Quarles ♥ Anna McLerran ♥ Hanna "Fandana" ♥ Jelena ♥ Lindsay Kaye ♥ Megan Schroeder ♥ Lori Lopez ♥ Blanca Weiss ♥ Sarah Jackson ♥ Jessie Ruddy ♥ Chloe ♥ PandaHalo ♥ Caitlin ♥ Sarah May ♥ Julie Milvana ♥ Emily Schifflet ♥ Ivy O'Neil ♥ Vanessa Hudgens ♥ Christina Katherine Trevillian ♥ Faeryn "Hambeast" ♥ Kacey Devoria ♥ Regina Novakova ♥ The Wallflower ♥ Jacklyn Romy ♥ Mia Hamm ♥ Catherine Sorrentino ♥ DoopieDoOver ♥ Jessica Quinn ♥ Bryan Shickley ♥ Various OCs (Magi-Chan Sonichu ♥ Cryzel Rosechu ♥ Mewtwo ♥ Sylvana Rosechu ♥ Pickchu) ♥ Tings Tingz ♥ Jacob Sockness ♥ MKRNightVee ♥ Annie Ikenberry ♥ Isabella Janke ♥ Fiona ♥ Barbara Chandler ♥ Flutter
 Heart-Torch-Comic.jpg
Purpose
Obstacles
Writings
Resources
See also
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