Simonla Rosechu

Simonla Rosechu (aka Simonla) is an orange Sonic recolor rosechu who can turn her arms into drills and dig underground. She also has a drill at the end of her tail.

Originally a fan character submitted by Evan named Simonchu, Chris instead added breasts and a china and turned it into Simonla so he'd have something to masturbate to.

Evan told Chris he got his drills from being raised by Beedrill, though any bona fide weeaboo knows the drills and the name come from Simon the Driller, from Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann.

Her actual character biography is basically non-existent. While the members of the Chaotic Combo all have their own retarded little backstories to explain where they came from and what they're doing together, Simonla just shows up one day, ready to strip naked and present backdrops. Where she's been and why she never helped with all the crazy shit that happens in CWCville is never addressed. At all.

Development

Before...

On 26 August 2008, Evan posted on his DeviantArt account:

My Sonichu fancharacter.

Simonchu Age: 14 Ground/Electric

Simonchu was originally a Pikachu, raised by a swarm of Beedrill. However, when Perfect Chaos attacked Station Square, the Pikachu and Beedrills watched from a nearby forest. In the middle of the battle a flash of pure Chaos energy was released, killing all the Beedrills. The Pikachu, however, was able to absorb the Chaos energy and use it to evolve. Depressed due to his parents' demise, Simonchu took his parents' drills and dug deep underground, leaving no one in CWCville to know of this unique Sonichu and his awesome powers.

until today...

...

...and after. Chris has the reverse Midas touch - everything he touches turns to shit.

Now I really must send it to him and hope he includes Simonchu in another issue. He is JUST bad enough to fit into Sonichu.

Three months later, Chris did use the character, as he had wanted to create a ground-type Sonichu or Rosechu character. He could have used Simonchu, as he had Evan's permission to, but, feeling that he had enough Sonichu characters (or, more likely, needing material to mass debate to), he decided to turn Simonchu into Simonla (playing off Simone, the feminine form of Simon), because to Chris, tits = better. Chris-chan also misinterpreted the cloak Simonchu wore as some sort of shell, judging by Simonla's line, "My shell is removable!"

Chris has claimed on Simonla's CWCipedia page that in Episode 20 he will introduce Simonchu as a ground (and only ground) type. He never showed up.

Forced Romance

“	plus pairing Simonla with Wild as a couple; that GIVES multiple meanings to the phrase "Opposites Attract."	”
Chris, completely failing to explain anything.

In Episode 19, Simonla attends the dating classes and is eventually paired up with Wild Sonichu. Chris-chan had previously revealed this to Evan in the ancient Sonichu IRC chatroom, but it ended up creating one of the most horrific pages in Sonichu history.

Evan's Response

In late December 2009, Evan e-mailed Chris, accusing him of lying about the resolution Chris claimed to have worked out with him. Chris ignored this e-mail. Four mailbags later, Evan once again petitioned Chris, this time saying Chris was stealing his character. Evan politely asked Chris to kill Simonla in the comic, yet Chris responded by saying that he could not write out Simonla, as she was Wild's girlfriend, and that he shouldn't be a monster for wanting to do so.

Evan tried again, tired of it all, where Chris pointedly refused once more. Disillusioned with Chris, Evan allowed the creator of Asperchu, Alec Benson Leary, to feature Simonchu as one of Sonichu's friends. Whilst Simonchu is portrayed as a homosexual in the comic, Evan confirmed in an e-mail to Chris that Simonchu is bisexual, and that Alec treated the character with far more respect than changing his gender without permission. Chris still persists with his refusal, on the grounds that depriving Wild of his girlfriend would be awful.

Evan would ask Chris to remove Simonla once again in Mailbag 43. Chris responded with one of his most bizarre and megalomanical statements yet, explaining that Simonla "didn't want" to leave CWCville, and that Evan himself "moves on" under the influence of Chris' Directorial Powers. Chris would later claim that Simonla is not merely an edit of Simonchu with a vagina:

“	...IF I start with a Normal Rosechu, give her ground and dirt for skin, add some Drills, Natural Second Transparent Eyelids, an Armadillo Shell with a Drill Spot for a Marking on the front, and Construction Shoes, DOES NOT MEAN AT ALL of YOUR story of "Re-Modifying Simonchu with a Vagina"; THE TWO ARE SEPARATE, INDIVIDUAL CHARACTERS, so do us all a favor and QUIT B****ING AND STRESSING YOURSELF TO YOUR OWN PREMATURE DEATH.	”
Chris, Mailbag 44.

TL;DR Pointless, throwaway relationships = Rights to use a fan character, in Chris's mind.

Simonla the Pedofork

In the Dating Education episode, we see Simonla outside Cwcville U talking to Zapina, the 14-year-old girl who wants to strip despite those "dumb child protection Laws" Chris and the Sonichu gang hate so much. Zapina refers to Simonla as "her best friend", which is creepy enough, before Simonla instructs her to get a "16-year-old boy".

One can only wonder why she would do such a thing, when any woman in her right mind would tell her to focus on her studies and hang out with friends her own age before worrying about boys, especially one two years older when she's clearly underage!

Gallery

• 

  Chris subtly lets slip his pedofork tendencies through Simonla

• 

  this is God punishing Evan for sending him those e-mails.

• 

  The e-mail confirming Simonla's appearance.

• 

  Chris's original design of Simonla.

See also

For Truth and Honesty, see the archived CWCipedia page on Simonla Rosechu

• Evan
• The TRUE, HONEST and PICKLE-HAVING Advenures of Simonchu and Niachu: [1]