Sonichu (comic)

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Man's ultimate Rorschach test
My art speaks for me
Christian introducing his oeuvre

Sonichu is Christian Weston Chandler's official poorly drawn comic book adventures of him and his (imaginary) friends.

Introduction

The inadvertent shattering of his heart from Sarah Hammer, along with the expulsion from English class and the confrontation with Mary Lee Walsh provided the impetus for Christian to kick start the comic series in full force. It initially served as a complement to his Love Quest as a feeble attempt to link an accomplishment, or boast his own self-worth to unsuspecting prey... after all Sonichu is "Zappin' to the Extreme"! He is Christian Weston Chandler's only son, and the first way past cooler Electric Hedgehog Pokémon!

If you haven't closed this page yet:

  • It's because despite reading, and re-reading the words... it still doesn't make it any sense
  • You're in a state of shock (ANOTHER VICTIM OF SONICHU'S LIGHTNING, JERKOP!)
  • You are an aspiring autistic artist looking for some inspiration
  • You're laughing so hard you can't wait for what comes next!

The comics series has been hosted on the various incarnations of Christian's homepage (currently being hosted at the CWCipedia), and was originally promoted from his now defunct Sonichu business cards. Each new addition to the series would proudly sport the now-infamous to be continued disclaimer page. In fact, the comics are not updated with any regular frequency: In five years Chris has yet to complete twelve issues. This, of course, from a man who is not in employment, education or training. With a page-rate such as this you know you can count on the quality!

Reader's guide to Sonichu

How-to and overview

File:JargonPage.jpg
The ever infamous JARGON page
TO BE CONTINUED (c) 2001-????

The Sonichu series begins with #0 instead of #1, and each issue contains multiple separately-numbered "episodes," so readers often lose track of which story happened in which issue. For example, Black Sonichu is introduced in Episode 4, which is the fifth story in the overall series and the first story in Sonichu #1, which is in turn the second comic. Further confounding matters are the Sub-Episodes about Christian's Love Quest, which appear sporadically throughout issues #0-4 and are numbered separately from the main stories. The original filenames are also misnumbered as #0 is referenced as #1, and this continues through the following issues.

Issues #0-1 feature Sonichu as the unchallenged star of the series, with Christian as a supporting character also appearing in the backup strips. By issue #2, the comic has seamlessly transitioned to Christian encountering people from his real life in shitty anime battles. Token attempts to tell Sonichu stories and introduce Sonichu spin-off characters are made in #3, but all pretense is dropped in #4-7, as the series becomes a vehicle for Christian Chandler as the leader of a heroic band of muppets battling old women and ineffectual security guards.

The comic series is presented as if it were a cartoon or anime (which might explain why comics mimic visual effects that work well in audiovisual context but fail on paper), and is encapsulated into seasons with various episodes (or series, for some of our Eurofag friends). Issue 10 is intended to wrap up the first season of Sonichu, however, it appears that Christian will fall slightly short of the standard 26 episode 'full season' run. This opens a can of worms as to the current vision of the comics: Is Sonichu intended to be the hit action/adventure soap-opera TV show that is broadcast in CWCville, or is it the historical documentation of Christian's and Sonichu's life and times? Perhaps it is destined to be the Gospel from the Stay-at-Home Autistic Virgin Male, hallowed be His name. Either way it remains unanswered whether Christian continues on with the series because he has a vain, misguided belief that some TRUE and HONEST soul will consider these as 'storyboards' for proper licensing and production.

Art imitating life

Sensing some criticism for the self-centeredness of his work, Christian wrote himself out of the series toward the end of Sonichu #7, trapping the Christian character in the Time Void so that the storyline could focus on other characters. Despite this, Sonichu still served as a strong Mary Sue character, as seen in Sonichu fighting 4-cent_garbage.com in Sonichu #8. This self-imposed exile lasted about five minutes, as Christian managed to make a cameo on page 18 of Sonichu #8.

He returned from the Time Void at the end of issue #9, giving all non-Christian characters approximately 1 issue to have the spotlight to themselves, during which they mostly talked about how much they loved Christian and hoped he would return safely. On the final page of the issue, Chris claimed that he would write himself out of the series permanently, giving his characters the opportunity to shine on their own. He went back on this promise almost the moment he made it — the entirety of issue #10 are some of the most Christian-centric of the entire series.

Following the theft of his Medallions of Fail by Blanca, Christian immediately released a new comic adapting the theft into his fictional canon and explaining that the TRUE source of his power lay in his High School Ring of Fail. Since this story was necessarily set after Christian escapes the time void, it was deemed a special preview of Sonichu #10, despite the fact that Chris had at that point not finished Sonichu #8 or even begun Sonichu #9.

The entire Sonichu series has been faithfully adapted into audiobooks on YouTube.

List of issues

Cover Issue Episode Title New characters Last appearance Plot summary
Issuezero.jpg Sonichu 0 Episode 1 "Sonichu's Orgin" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Episode 2 "Genesis of the Lovehogs" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Episode 3 "Sonichu vs. Naitsirhc" nnnnn llll pppppppp
"Classic Sonichu Strips" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Sub-Episode 1 Christian Chandler in "Jerkop-tastropie" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Issueone.jpg Sonichu 1 Episode 4 "Sonichu's Orgin" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Episode 5 "Genesis of the Lovehogs" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Episode 6 "Sonichu vs. Naitsirhc" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Sub-Episode 2 Christian Chandler in "The Rise & Fall of My Heart" nnnnn llll pppppppp
SchuComic3Cover.jpg Sonichu 2 Episode 7 Sonichu in "Anchuent Prophecy" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Episode 8 Christian Chandler in "Chaos & Serenity" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Episode 9 Chris-Chan, Saramah, & Wes-Li in "The Evil that Stomped CWCville" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Sub-Episode 3 Christian Chandler & Sonichu in "Witch Confront" nnnnn llll pppppppp
File:Issuethree.jpg Sonichu 3 Episode 10 "Sonichu Babies" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Episode 11 The Chaotic Combo in "When Hedgehogs Meet" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Sub-Episode 4 Christian Chandler in "McAttack" nnnnn llll pppppppp
150px Sonichu 4 Sub-Episode 1 Christian Chandler in "Jerkop-tastropie" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Sub-Episode 2 Christian Chandler in "The Rise & Fall of My Heart" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Sub-Episode 3 Christian Chandler & Sonichu in "Witch Confront" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Sub-Episode 4 Christian Chandler in "McAttack" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Sub-Episode 5 Christian Chandler in "McAttack part 2" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Sub-Episode 6 "Christian Chandler's Backyard Safari" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Sub-Episode 7 Christian Chandler in "Off-Target" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Sub-Episode 8 Christian Chandler in "Off-Target part 2" nnnnn llll pppppppp
File:Issuefive.jpg Sonichu 5 Episode 12 Christian Chandler in "My Best Friend's Cherokian Wedding" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Episode 13 "Shattered Hearts & Entrapment" nnnnn llll pppppppp
File:Issuefive.jpg Sonichu 6 Episode 12.5 "One Lucky Dog" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Episode 14 "Evil is Afoot!" nnnnn llll pppppppp
150px Sonichu 7 Episode 15 Sonichu, Magi-Chan and Christian in "Time for a Ball" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Episode 16 C.W.C. and Sonichu in "Time Hogs" nnnnn llll pppppppp
"Tune in Everyday to Station KCWC for Everything!" nnnnn llll pppppppp
150px Sonichu 8 Episode 17 "Rage Against the Garbage" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Episode 18 "Spring Break, 2008" nnnnn llll pppppppp
150px Sonichu 9 Episode 19 "Date Ed (Even Though the Idea Sounds Dated)" nnnnn llll pppppppp
Episode 20 "CWC-Defense" nnnnn llll pppppppp
150px Sonichu 10 Episode 21 Christian Chandler in "Director Amenities" nnnnn llll pppppppp
150px Sonichu 11
150px Sonichu 12

Unfinished and Unreleased issues

These comics are not yet completed by Chris, and most of them were briefly seen in videos during the Ivy saga. Most of the unreleased comics were obtained by trolls and publicly released.

Unfinished

  • Chris began work on a special Christmas episode in mid-December 2009, but aside from that, only a cover exists. The release date was announced for 17 March 2010. Since Chris is a lazy fatass, and also due to Surfshack Tito and The Wallflower, the pages were never released. On 24 April 2010, the Sysop uploaded pages by a troll.
  • So far only a cover exists.

Unreleased

  • Chris rescues Ivy from the clutches of Clyde Cash. Six known pages are available. The rest are unverified, but speculated to be those displayed in the video.
  • The fail-tastic union of Chris and Ivy. The pages are not yet numbered, and text remains hand-lettered. A cover page is absent for this comic.
  • The even more fail-tastic honeymoon of Chris and Ivy. This is technically still an unreleased issue as it was provided by The Miscreants (as jesuschrist.zip). It is in a similar state to Special 02: Pages have no numbers, text is still hand-written, and also missing a cover.
  • Chris rescues Kacey from Liquid (though it's unclear why Kacey needs to be rescued if she's in a consensual relationship with Liquid), shoots Liquid in the shins, and then makes out with Kacey. This is a five-page short with no cover, but it does have page numbers and computer lettering.

Chris has claimed that in total he plans to complete 50 to 100 issues in his life time.

Adaptations and related work

External links

CWCipedia logo.png
For Truth and Honesty, see the archived CWCipedia page on the Sonichu Comic Collection