User:Solaris999/Main Page

Welcome to the CWCki!

The encyclopedia about Christian Weston Chandler .

WHERE NO SHIT IS TOO MINOR!

We currently have 2,945 articles...and counting!

*Any names, or persons, discussed in this wiki,
that may seem similar to anyone in real life,
are purely coincidental, or otherwise parodic.*

Da Update
It is currently April 2019. For all current updates about Chris, visit the Kiwi Farms. Presently, the CWCki lacks enough editors to maintain all of its updates, leading to "Da Update" being discontinued on 11 October 2018. Articles are still updated when possible by the remaining editors. Unfortunately, registration for new users has been disabled since 21 August 2018, due to abuse from spambots.

Quote of the Now

“	Have you been to Cleveland, Ohio? Big city there. There is a Superman statue in a small museum, and that's pretty much the hometown of the chronicler, and his wife, and his friend who did some of the- who did the art. There's a lovely statue over there, I'd say go check it out sometime. I also checked out the Christmas Story House, Ralphie's House.	”
Chris on Cameo

Begging Counter

Do not donate to or buy anything from Chris: he lies about needing money and habitually neglects his customers and supporters (and worse). It has been…

1,035

days since Chris last begged for money.

Record Streak: 1,874 days

1,099

days since Chris last uploaded pages to meet his (formerly) paid obligations to the Sonichu comic.

Record Streak: 2,519 days

6,179

days since Chris last applied for a job.

Record Streak: 6,179 days

An Etsy customer gambled that Chris would deliver and lost, still bitter over it three years later.

Article of the Now


Christian Weston Chandler (born Christopher Weston Chandler on 24 February 1982) is a high-functioning autistic virgin, Honest, Cool and Honest Dude, and creator of Sonichu, a brilliant character, starring in his own self-titled online comic book. His adult life has been largely defined by his goal of most Normal Human Beings; Finding their Meaning of Existence, Their True Love, Their own Self-Character. No One should ever interfere or ever make a mockery of such a tride and true quest to finding HIS own Happiness with his WOMAN who is to be his Wife. Yes, friends, it gets far sweeter.

This Day Marks the Tenth Anniversary of Chris's edits to the Cwcki.

( See more...)

Did You Know

... that Chris has performed oral sex on Magi-Chan?
... that BlueSpike was the ween in the JULAAAAAAAY call?
... that JenkinsJinkies is definitely NOT Chris?
... that Chris was no longer stuck as a virgin with rage after hiring a prostitute?
... that Chris will never get to return the favor by dancing with Tiffany Gowen at their high school reunion?
... that Chris has committed assault and battery against Michael Snyder and illegally pepper sprayed the Yellow-Shirted Foe?
... that Chris got fired from Wendy's for scaring a small child with his Donald Duck impersonation?
... that Chris attempted to fix The Oversized Drinking Straw of Fail, and somehow made it make less sense?
... that ~~Chris~~ ~~BILLY MAYS~~ ~~Allison Amber~~ ~~Brendan Fraser~~ ~~Mary Lee Walsh~~ Robbie Van Drawson is the Mayor of CWCville?
... that the Idea Guys brainwashed Chris into believing that his imaginary daughter Crystal would be brought into the world by Chris anally raping Sonichu?
- ... and that Chris has once fisted Sonichu as a punishment?
... that Chris is cool with adoption, but his dream of his future daughter calls for blood, tears and semenal descent?

This Day in Christory

Today in Christory, in 2008, Evan contacts Chris with his fan-character, Simonchu. Chris rips off the design and turns the character into a girl, which causes much drama in the future.

(more...)

Today, in 2023, Chris returned to Twitter, liking several posts about MLP and G-Fuel.

(more...)

Picture of the Now

Video of the Now