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christian has been spotted at burgerking where there dwells an even more RETARDED individual behind the counter. |-
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For years, trolls joked that Chris, in his desperation to find a boyfriend-free girl, would eventually turn to his mom based on his occasional off‐putting comments about her and their constant proximity to one another. Few thought he would ever go through with the act, though — but Chris found a way to surprise and horrify everybody.
Chris and Barb's incestuous affair most likely began on 27 June 2021, but his social media presence earlier in the month may hint at an earlier start to the affair. As early as 22 June, he began addressing Barbara by the unsettling pet name of "Barbie Chan", which may have indicated when he began to get intimate with her. After this date, Chris claimed that he had sex with her once every three nights until being forcibly stopped by being removed from the house.
On 27 July 2021, during a call with Isabella "Bella" Loretta Janke, Chris revealed the details of his sexual activities with his mother of his own volition, also discussing it in text messages later that day. In those, Chris discussed stimulating his elderly mother with his hands, performing cunnilingus on her, and having penetrative sex with her. He claimed that Barbara compared him favorably to her previous sexual partners, including Chris's late father Bob, who had been unable to provide her with an orgasm or stimulate her G-spot.
Files were leaked to the public the following night, and social workers removed Chris from Barbara on the morning of 30 July. In early August 2021, Chris was arrested, officially charged with one count of incest, and was held without bail.
Chris was kept in jail or in a mental hospital until 27 March 2023, at which point he was released into a group home. As a result of Chris complying with the autism disorder deferred disposition program, his incest charge was dropped in August 2023. He has commented on the charge against him numerous times since his arrest and denied that he and his mother had sex, despite previous admission to the contrary. Due to the weens abusing the donation system on his livestreams to spam such messages, he had come up with a lot of excuses, from claiming that " [he has] been forgiven and cleansed of any and all sins of [his], period", to stating that it happened in another timeline.
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Did You Know...
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- ... that Chris considers the "romance" in his comics as his best art?
- ... that Chris describes World War II as "a very tragic event with guns, insults, and... yuck!"?
- ... that Chris's 23andMe DNA results indicate that he has no Cherokee ancestry, but is 1.3% Italian?
- ... that Chris cannot do a single pull-up or push-up?
- ... that Chris once knew a man from Nantucket?
- ... that on his MySpace, Chris marked his fat contacts with "More to Love"?
- ... that Chris is the Level-Up King?
- ... that Virginia is for Virgins?
- ... that Bob believed Megan Schroeder, Michael Snyder and some homos are behind all the trolling?
- ... and that Chris believed it too?
- ... that Chris no longer lives at 14 Branchland Court and instead lives in the house owned by Caden Peck?
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This Day in Christory
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Today in Christory, in 2007, Megan tells Chris she is glad he lost the PaRappa the Rapper Contest because she didn't want to be alone with him due to his inability to keep his hands off her. Chris is heart-shattered.
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In 2023, Chris showed up to court for his review hearing. A fan filmed Chris entering the courthouse, and he also allegedly briefly spoke to Chris before David Heilberg intervened.
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Quote of the Now | ||||||
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Da Update | ||||||
 It is currently August 2026. It has been...
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Improvement Project of the Now | ||||||
August 2026: The social media post archives from 2019 to 2021 are incomplete, as they are missing timestamps and many smaller posts are omitted. Please update the respective articles to include all tweets, rather than just the "major" ones. The following long-term projects to improve the wiki are also needed:
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