Chris and fashion
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| “ | Oh yeah, you just love to see me in my- in the old red, white and blue. | ” |
| Chris to Kacey[1] | ||
Christian Weston Chandler has a somewhat peculiar taste in fashion. Although he is willing to spend thousands of dollars on video games, toys, and sex dolls, Chris is very stingy when it comes to shopping for his clothes, which are usually purchased secondhand at thrift stores like The Salvation Army and Goodwill. The majority of shirts he owns are colorful collared shirts and undersized rugby shirts, most of which are decorated with horizontal stripes, making him look even fatter.
Mailbag 42 revealed that at least one (the "Advice Dog" shirt) of his shirts was purchased by his mother. Although his mother doesn't directly dress him anymore, Chris still chooses to wear these shirts. However, with the advent of the Tomgirl Saga, this clothing seems to have fallen from grace in favor of equally hideous (but more feminine) garb.
Childhood
In his youth, Chris set the general tone for years to come with many striped polos, T-shirts, and khaki pants. The only difference compared to today is that he sometimes even dared to wear single-colored shirts with his favorite game and television characters on them. The only article of clothing he was seen in until the summer of 2010 that didn't follow the "long-sleeved, colorful clown suit" theme is the Pokémon T-shirt that he has owned since he was 19. Being yellow, it does not look particularly good on him.
Trademark clothing
Chris's classic outfit consists of:
- His favorite shirt, a St. John's Bay® Rugby Stripe Sueded Polo, which is so tight that it accentuates his voluptuous, masculine bosoms. This is the shirt that Chris almost invariably draws himself wearing in the comics. It was destroyed in the 2014 fire that gutted the Chandler house.[2]
- His medallions (sporadically) and his High School Ring
- A pair of pedo-glasses attached to a chain.
- Jeans or khaki slacks. Chris's jeans typically define his rear end to a disturbing level — he may be wearing women's jeans, or he may simply still wear pants his gut long ago outgrew.
- The Belt Buckle of Fail.
- Alternatively, a green terrycloth bathrobe with a mismatched (of course) black belt on occasions when he's in the mood for recycling, or when even getting dressed would involve too much stress.
- On occasion, a dark suit jacket, perhaps for the many funerals that plague his existence.
- During the winter months, a dark blue parka with orange and yellow stripes to enhance visibility.
- Since late 2009, a bra to keep the previously mentioned bosoms in check.
The "IBA" outfit
In mid-June 2009, roughly around the time he made friends, Chris temporarily decided that his current look was old hat. He got rid of many of the striped shirts (mostly because he couldn't fit into them anymore) and grew a goatee.
The reformed Chris's wardrobe consisted of:
- Sunglasses over normal glasses (glasses chain remains)
- T-shirt over long sleeved shirt.
- Goatee.
- Tattoo sleeves
- A black vest that is too small for his girth.
- DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS
His new attire was first properly presented to the world in the Rollin' and Trollin' video.
Soon afterward, however, he went back to sporting his traditional clown shirts, and claimed that he was pressured into making the Rollin' and Trollin' video.
The "Gay Trucker" outfit
After he promised to leave the Internet in the spring of 2010, Chris threw away his clown shirts, ditched the medallion for several months (it returned in September), and picked up a new wardrobe in an attempt to look like a normal person, including a denim jacket from Goodwill that he cut the sleeves off of just to look gayer.[3] The result is a modified version of the IBA outfit. It has been observed that Chris tries to look like a bad boy, but he ends up looking like a gay trucker, hence the trolls' term for his new wardrobe.
The only way he could make it look gayer is by combining it with his muscle bra. Which, unfortunately, he has. And in public. At this point, even if he's lost some of his favorite shirts, going back to the medallion would actually improve his chances of picking up gal-pals.
With the arrival of the gay trucker outfit also came an interest in T-shirts that boldly express Chris's desire for sex, often in exceedingly tasteless ways. The first clear look at one of these shirts was in a profoundly disturbing video leaked in late April 2010 which featured Chris wearing a parody shirt that changed the Mountain Dew logo so it read "Mount and Do Me". That said, the video was made for a potential sweetheart that Chris desperately wanted to have hanky-panky with, leaving open the possibility that Chris didn't intend to dress like that outside his bedroom.
Chris destroyed any hope of that being the case on 18 June 2010 when he wore a shirt that said "Enjoy Vagina" to Fridays After Five--a public, family-oriented concert, mind you. He then topped this later, by pulling that shirt over his head, and standing around in his muscle bra, on which he had written "WANT WOMAN!" The common belief is that these unfunny, sexually-themed shirts are the next evolution of the attraction sign, a way for him to inform potential mates that he is both straight and available without ever having to talk to people nor spend any effort in making a sign.
In late August 2010, Chris returned to the Internet with a series of videos where he sported simple, loose-fitting T-shirts (including a Manchester High School senior class sweatshirt which he must have reverently preserved for at least a decade). The effect is interesting, bringing him closer to something like normality than he's been in many years. He's still a pale, sweaty, balding, grotesquely fat, pathetically weak manchild, but in Ruckersville, that puts him reasonably close to the mainstream.
In October 2014, the Internet collectively got brown pants after Chris made his first video in a while. In that video, he was depicted with his Manchester High School sweatshirt, while in the follow-up, he was shown with an orange shirt and striped sleeves underneath.
A number of Chris's T-shirts appear to have been with him for a decade or more--the Manchester High shirt, a souvenir shirt from the BrickFest event in 2000, a Pokémon trainer shirt from the Books-a-Million where Chris played card games between 1998 and 2000. Either he's willing to keep shirts that have some personal significance around for a very long time, or his packrat tendencies prevent him from throwing any of them away.
The Carlos Chantor outfit
A single picture of Chris posing as a male prostitute was posted on Escorts.com. It is significant because it implies that Chris can dress like a normal human being if he wants to remain inconspicuous.
The black shirt and sunglasses he is wearing are never seen in any later pictures.
The “Tomgirl” series
- Main article: Tomgirl Pictures
In April 2011, a series of pictures leaked, showing Chris dressed in women's clothing in public. This outfit consists of:
- Bright green nail polish
- Earrings (a purple glass stud and a blue ring) - note that piercing the right ear was at one point code for homosexuality; guess which one Chris pierced twice?
- Women's sandals
- Blue eyeliner
- Jeans
- Blue string top
- Black thong
- A silver ring[4] (note that silver rings have been used to symbolize a pledge virginity until marriage)[5]
- A red and blue sweater vest (tank top) with a red shirt underneath it
- Red lipstick
- A new pair of glasses
Later Tomgirl Fashion
Chris's tomgirl antics have continued for several years, still happening in late 2014, but although he has long since dispensed with the clownish polo shirts and jeans, many characteristics of his tomgirl wardrobe seem remarkably consistent with the way he dressed when he still wore men's clothing, especially in terms of color co-ordination and clothing size. Some of the most frequent themes in his feminine fashion choices as of 2014 are:
- Clashing violently opposed colors (particularly red with blue/green)
- Wearing clothing far too small for him (see the October 2014 Facebook Posts for examples)
- Wearing dresses or skirts with very high hems
- Bras
- Omission of glasses, possibly due to contact lenses
- Eye makeup, which is applied poorly and usually purple in color
Later on in the year, however, Chris's fashion sense would deteriorate completely, as seen in the 26 December 2014 incident, where Chris is seen wearing the following:
- Purple My Little Pony shades, used as a "disguise" for his undercover protesting
- A silver headband, showing off his ever-receding hairline
- Manchester High sweatshirt
- Short jeans, matched with long, purple socks and/or another pair of pants
- Boots (possibly Uggs)
Going on into 2015, it was confirmed that Chris went to the trial for the 26 December 2014 incident in his tomgirl attire. This suggests that even having to face a judge isn't enough to convince him to dress properly.
Theory of fashion
The clothes that Christian chooses seem almost like a costume for him, especially his infamous striped shirt, which later gained the aforementioned nicknames of the "clown shirt", or "The Classic". Given that he is autistic, observers often speculate that he may have difficulty with identifying things visually, including himself. In Sonichu #7, he alluded to having to take time to study his appearance in a mirror, possibly wearing the shirt in question. Either way, Chris seems to regard his shirt as an integral part of his identity in the same way that trolls do.
His fashion sense has shown itself to be evolving in the last year, but moving in cycles. In 2010 he seemed to have ditched the Sonichu medallion and moved into what could be described as a more edgy, hip, aggressive look. His success at being so is on par for course with the rest of his attempts at things.
Of note, during his conversation with Kacey while posing as Liquid Chris he claimed to also own a striped shirt like the "impostor". He expressed much joy at the fact that it was red, white and blue, implying owning a shirt was proof of his patriotism.
Wardrobe
Below is a gallery of most of Chris's wardrobe, along with links to the videos they appeared in:
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This article is in need of original illustrations. Help the CWCki and the Artist Commune project by drawing some original illustrations and inserting them into the article. |
Wrist warmer
| “ | Yes, it is a part of my necklace; it's a "Wilson" wrist-warmer I use to cover the discomfort of the number of Links back there. | ” |
| Chris[6][public source needed] | ||
Chris likely wears this article to counter sensory defensiveness, a condition common among autistics, in which a normally harmless sensation directly triggers a fight-or-flight reaction.
Fanny pack
A fanny pack (known as a "bum bag" in the British Commonwealth) is a small fabric pouch secured with a zipper and worn by use of a strap around the hips or waist. Fanny packs reached the peak of their popularity in the late 1980s and early-to-mid 1990s, and have since been considered to be a fashion faux pas.[7] Naturally, Chris wore them throughout the 1990s and 2000s.
Cosplaying
- Main article: Chris and cosplaying
Sources
- ↑ Kacey Call 2g
- ↑ eBay comment: "I lost the shirt in the fire" http://contact.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ShowAllQuestions&iid=191232666489&requested=jesusguidesme2&redirect=0&frm=2047675&ShowASQAlways=1&ssPageName=PageAskSellerQuestion_VI
- ↑ Kacey Call 2
- ↑ File:TG6.jpg
- ↑ [1]
- ↑ Email from Chris posted in old PVCC thread 162
- ↑ http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/beauty/once-reviled-fanny-packs-get-a-high-fashion-makeover-and-an-even-higher-pricetag-2452640#photoViewer=1
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