Sonee & Rosey

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A Sonee and a Rosey. Note that Rosey's looking lustfully at Sonee. Seriously.

Sonees and Roseys are the pre-evolutionary forms of Sonichus and Rosechus. Their colors usually correspond to their type. Most Electric Hedgehog Pokémon in the comic started out as eggs that fell out of a rainbow and hatched as Sonees and Roseys.

Technically, baby versions of Sonichu and Rosechu never could have existed because they were transformed directly from a Pikachu and Raichu, not Pichu, their pre-evolved form. It's generally understood that the miracle of birth does not provide Sonichu offspring with their shoes, bows, and skirts shown,[1] but there are contradictions.[2] (Whatever the case, they automatically gain clothing upon evolution... but again there are more contradictions[3].) None of the Chaotic Combo, or Silvana, correspond to the "Original Sonee and Rosey", but rather to the prismatic range of the Rainbow. There's also a continuity in the attire with the "Sonichu/Rosechu" species; "Sonees" are stark-naked with shoes while "Roseys" are wearing dresses. This might be a link with their sexuality but Chris, their grandfather, is unclear on the subject.

Although Chris has stated that he finds them cute, most Sonichu readers reacted in disgust when first confronted with these hideously repulsive creatures, and a large consensus has agreed that they are some of the most aggravating characters, their lack of comprehensible (relatively speaking; most Sonichu dialogue is at least in something that resembles English) speech being a major cause of anger. Their physical appearance is also a source of much disgust, as it is an overload of conventionally "cute" characteristics, done horribly wrong. They look like they're trying too hard to be cute, and it is sickening.

The appearance by Sonichu and Rosechu's Children in A Sonichu Day is a particularly grating one, as Chris gives them some of the most retarded dialogue he has ever given, in a despicably twee voice. Their appearance in Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares, where he uses them to represent younger versions of himself and Sarah Hammer, is also horrific when you realize just how contrived and passive-aggressive it all is.


Sonee

Sonee is the pre-evolved form of sonichu. He is known to have a lot of spunk and speed. This cute pokemon packs a lot of action.
Sonee Animal Crossing card[1]

The pre-evolved form of Sonichu. He has a lot of spunk and speed, and is quite "cute". He is apparently born with shoes on. Like most other Pokemon, they can only speak gibberish.

Rosey

File:SchuComic4Page4.jpg
The birth of a Rosey Bubbles, sans skirt.
Rosey is the pre-evolved form of rosechu. Her cuteness always gets the awe of her enemies. When she falls, her skirt acts as a parachute.
Rosey Animal Crossing card

The pre-evolved form of Rosechu. According to Chris her so called "cuteness" always gets the awe of her enemies, and when she falls, her skirt acts as a parachute. This last feat is physically impossible, but never mind that, because it offers an opportunity for panty-shots, that is if they had any, which in fact makes it even worse. It is implied that Roseys are born without any clothing, and shoes and skirts are purchased separately. The Rosey form of Bubbles, for instance (see right), was never born with a skirt. The birth of Sandy appears to confirm this. [4]

Biologee

An examination of the birthdates of Sonichu and Rosechu's Children reveals that Rosechus have a gestation period of less than three months. This amount of time would for a normal creature be insufficient for healthy development, even for monotremes, which possibly explains why Sonees and Roseys appear retarded and half-baked all the time.

However, Sonees and Roseys seem to vary a lot in intelligence. As infants, the Chaotic Combo could only say their own names (which is supposed to be how Pokemon communicate). And the "Original" Sonee and Rosey can only say Goo-Goo, suggesting they start with even less intelligence. However, the Sonichu Children are capable of speaking in complete (albeit mangled) sentences. Hell, Sandy was able to talk right after she was born! This discrepancy in intelligence has been addressed in Mailbag 23 in which Chris states that Cerah, Christine and Robbie learned English from their parents and that the Chaotic combo didn't have English speaking guardians, which is a lie as Bubbles started speaking English while trying to rescue her mother and Wild knew English as a Sonichu. This still doesn't address why Sandy could speak right after being born. To further confound the situation, Magi-chan informs the readers via textwall that Wild had to teach her English after she demonstrated fluency with the language, implying that she didn't know it beforehand.[5] Regardless of this, they are all still of inferior intelligence.

It is also worth noting that Sonees and Roseys do not wear the white gloves that Sonichu and Rosechu wear at all times; acquiring the gloves is likely a rite-of-passage. Disturbingly, Sonees and Roseys have rounded stumps rather than hands which gives them the appearance of Thalidomide babies, but knowing Chris, he probably ripped them off from the creatures from the Sonic games known as Chao.

There's also the strong possibility that Sonichu and Rosechu's children are not representative of the typical Sonee & Rosey Poke-type. In Sonichu 10, Sandy Rosechu went from hatching from an egg to her mature form and the intellectual skills of a fourth grader inside of a single week! while Punchy evolved to his full form the same day, even though he had his tail ripped off. This leaves us to formulate the hypothesis that Sonichu's children are kinda slower than the average to evolve in their adult form. Another possibility is that Sandy evolved rapidly because her father lavished attention on her, while Cera, Christine and Robbie are left with the nanny while their parents are forced to fulfill the wishes of a deranged tyrant. Alternatively, Sonees and Roseys evolve more rapidly under stressful situations (see Bubbles and Punchy), thereby suggesting Wild's attention is a lot less wholesome than the comic would lead you to believe.

Galleree

See also

Pickles.jpg
Tired of "Good Fan Art"? Visit our constantly expanding Gallery of Evil Fan Art! There's even a whole section dedicated to Sonee & Rosey!

References

  1. Issue 10 Page 84 Sandy is born nude.
  2. Issue 3 Page 9 Magi-chan is born with a vest.
  3. Issue 3 Page 7 Angelica is born (and raised) nude, but Chris has to give her shoes and a scrunchie at evolution.
  4. Issue 10 Page 84
  5. Issue 10 Page 86