Difference between revisions of "Main Page"
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christian has been spotted at burgerking where there dwells an even more RETARDED individual behind the counter. | christian has been spotted at burgerking where there dwells an even more RETARDED individual behind the counter. | ||
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| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Article of the now}}</div> | |||
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| <h2 id="mp-dyk-h2" style="margin:0; background:#cef2e0; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border:1px solid #a3bfb1; text-align:left; color:#000; padding:0.2em 0.4em;">Did You Know...</h2> | |||
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| style="color:#000;" | <div>{{Christory}}</div> | |||
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Revision as of 21:33, 3 July 2010
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christian has been spotted at burgerking where there dwells an even more RETARDED individual behind the counter. |-
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For years, trolls joked that Chris, in his desperation to find a boyfriend-free girl, would eventually turn to his mom based on his occasional off‐putting comments about her and their constant proximity to one another. Few thought he would ever go through with the act, though — but Chris found a way to surprise and horrify everybody.
Chris and Barb's incestuous affair most likely began on 27 June 2021, but his social media presence earlier in the month may hint at an earlier start to the affair. As early as 22 June, he began addressing Barbara by the unsettling pet name of "Barbie Chan", which may have indicated when he began to get intimate with her. After this date, Chris claimed that he had sex with her once every three nights until being forcibly stopped by being removed from the house.
On 27 July 2021, during a call with Isabella "Bella" Loretta Janke, Chris revealed the details of his sexual activities with his mother of his own volition, also discussing it in text messages later that day. In those, Chris discussed stimulating his elderly mother with his hands, performing cunnilingus on her, and having penetrative sex with her. He claimed that Barbara compared him favorably to her previous sexual partners, including Chris's late father Bob, who had been unable to provide her with an orgasm or stimulate her G-spot.
Files were leaked to the public the following night, and social workers removed Chris from Barbara on the morning of 30 July. In early August 2021, Chris was arrested, officially charged with one count of incest, and was held without bail.
Chris was kept in jail or in a mental hospital until 27 March 2023, at which point he was released into a group home. As a result of Chris complying with the autism disorder deferred disposition program, his incest charge was dropped in August 2023. He has commented on the charge against him numerous times since his arrest and denied that he and his mother had sex, despite previous admission to the contrary. Due to the weens abusing the donation system on his livestreams to spam such messages, he had come up with a lot of excuses, from claiming that " [he has] been forgiven and cleansed of any and all sins of [his], period", to stating that it happened in another timeline.
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Did You Know...
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- ... that Chris has performed oral sex on Magi-Chan?
- ... that BlueSpike was the ween in the JULAAAAAAAY call?
- ... that JenkinsJinkies is definitely NOT Chris?
- ... that Chris was no longer stuck as a virgin with rage after hiring a prostitute?
- ... that Chris will never get to return the favor by dancing with Tiffany Gowen at their high school reunion?
- ... that Chris has committed assault and battery against Michael Snyder and illegally pepper sprayed the Yellow-Shirted Foe?
- ... that Chris got fired from Wendy's for scaring a small child with his Donald Duck impersonation?
- ... that Chris attempted to fix The Oversized Drinking Straw of Fail, and somehow made it make less sense?
- ... that
ChrisBILLY MAYSAllison AmberBrendan FraserMary Lee WalshRobbie Van Drawson is the Mayor of CWCville? - ... that the Idea Guys brainwashed Chris into believing that his imaginary daughter Crystal would be brought into the world by Chris anally raping Sonichu?
- ... and that Chris has once fisted Sonichu as a punishment?
- ... that Chris is cool with adoption, but his dream of his future daughter calls for blood, tears and semenal descent?
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This Day in Christory
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Today in Christory, in 2008, Chris replaced his Encyclopedia Dramatica page with the words "YOU SHOULD ALL BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELVES! CWC DOES NOT DESERVE ALL THIS HATE!"
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Quote of the Now | ||||||
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Da Update | ||||||
 It is currently August 2026. It has been...
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Improvement Project of the Now | ||||||
August 2026: The social media post archives from 2019 to 2021 are incomplete, as they are missing timestamps and many smaller posts are omitted. Please update the respective articles to include all tweets, rather than just the "major" ones. The following long-term projects to improve the wiki are also needed:
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