Sonichu (comic)
| “ | My art speaks for me | ” |
| Christian introducing his oeuvre | ||
Sonichu was Christian Weston Chandler's official poorly drawn comic book adventures of him and his (imaginary) friends.
Introduction
The inadvertent shattering of his heart from Sarah Hammer, along with the expulsion from English class and the confrontation with Mary Lee Walsh provided the impetus for Christian to kick start the comic series in full force. It initially served as a complement to his Love Quest as a feeble attempt to link an accomplishment, or boast his own self-worth to unsuspecting prey... after all Sonichu is "Zappin' to the Extreme"! He is Christian Weston Chandler's only son, and the first way past cooler Electric Hedgehog Pokémon!
If you haven't closed this page yet:
- It's because despite reading, and re-reading the words... it still doesn't make it any sense
- You're in a state of shock (ANOTHER VICTIM OF SONICHU'S LIGHTNING, JERKOP!)
- You are an aspiring autistic artist looking for some inspiration
- You're laughing so hard you can't wait for what comes next!
The comics series has been hosted on the various incarnations of Christian's homepage (currently hosted nowhere), and was originally promoted from his now defunct Sonichu business cards. Each new addition to the series would proudly sport the now-infamous to be continued disclaimer page. In fact, the comics are not updated with any regular frequency: In five years Chris has yet to complete twelve issues. This, of course, from a man who is not in employment, education or training. With a page-rate such as this you know you can count on the quality!
Reader's guide to Sonichu
How-to and overview
The Sonichu series began with #0 instead of #1, and each issue contained multiple separately-numbered "episodes," so readers often lost track of which story happened in which issue. For example, Black Sonichu was introduced in Episode 4, which was the fifth story in the overall series and the first story in Sonichu #1, which was in turn the second comic. Further confounding matters were the Sub-Episodes about Christian's Love Quest, which appeared sporadically throughout issues #0-4 and were numbered separately from the main stories. The original filenames were also misnumbered as #0 is referenced as #1, and this continued through the following issues.
Issues #0-1 featured Sonichu as the unchallenged star of the series, with Christian as a supporting character also appearing in the backup strips. By issue #2, the comic had seamlessly transitioned to Christian encountering people from his real life in shitty anime battles. Token attempts to tell Sonichu stories and introduce Sonichu spin-off characters were made in #3, but all pretense was dropped in #4-7 as the series becomes a vehicle for Christian, as the leader of a heroic band of muppets, to battle against an old woman and a group of ineffectual security guards.
The comic series was presented as if it were a cartoon or anime (which might explain why comics mimic visual effects that work well in audiovisual context but fail on paper), and was encapsulated into seasons with various episodes (or series, for some of our Eurofag friends). Issue 10 was intended to wrap up the first season of Sonichu, however, it appears that Christian will fall slightly short of the standard 26 episode 'full season' run. This opened a can of worms as to the current vision of the comics: Was Sonichu intended to be the hit action/adventure soap-opera TV show that is broadcast in CWCville, or was it the historical documentation of Christian's and Sonichu's life and times? Perhaps it was destined to be the Gospel from the Stay-at-Home Autistic Virgin Male, hallowed be His name. Either way it remained unanswered whether Christian continues on with the series because he has a vain, misguided belief that some TRUE and HONEST soul would consider these as 'storyboards' for proper licensing and production.
Art imitating life
Sensing some criticism for the self-centeredness of his work, Christian wrote himself out of the series toward the end of Sonichu #7, trapping the Christian character in the Time Void so that the storyline could focus on other characters. Despite this, Sonichu still served as a strong Mary Sue character, as seen in Sonichu fighting 4-cent_garbage.com in Sonichu #8. This self-imposed exile lasted about five minutes, as Christian managed to make a cameo on page 18 of Sonichu #8.
He returned from the Time Void at the end of issue #9, giving all non-Christian characters approximately 1 issue to have the spotlight to themselves, during which they mostly talked about how much they loved Christian and hoped he would return safely. On the final page of the issue, Chris claimed that he would write himself out of the series permanently, giving his characters the opportunity to shine on their own. He went back on this promise almost the moment he made it — the entirety of issue #10 are some of the most Christian-centric of the entire series.
Following the theft of his Medallions of Fail by Blanca, Christian immediately released a new comic adapting the theft into his fictional canon and explaining that the TRUE source of his power lay in his High School Ring of Fail. Since this story was necessarily set after Christian escapes the time void, it was deemed a special preview of Sonichu #10, despite the fact that Chris had at that point not finished Sonichu #8 or even begun Sonichu #9.
The entire Sonichu series has been faithfully adapted into audiobooks on YouTube.
List of issues
| Cover | Issue | Episode | Title | New characters | Last appearance | Plot summary | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
|
Sonichu 0 | Episode 1 | "Sonichu's Orgin" | Christian Weston Chandler, Sonichu, Sonic the Hedgehog, Perfect Chaos, Kel, Rosechu | Perfect Chaos | The amazing origin story of Sonichu, the electric hedgehog Pokémon! | |
| Episode 2 | "Genesis of the Lovehogs" | Random Pokemon | Same Random Pokemon | The origin story of how Sonichu and Rosechu became true loving couples! | |||
| Episode 3 | "Sonichu vs. Naitsirhc" | Naitsirhc | None | The first meeting between Sonichu and Naitsirhc! | |||
| "Classic Sonichu Strips" | Black Sonichu (Blake), Metonic, Vamprosa, Jerkops, Mary Lee Walsh, Barbara Chandler | Barbara Chandler | Random stupid stories with Sonichu | ||||
| Sub-Episode 1 | Christian Chandler in "Jerkop-tastropie" | None | None | The first Sub-Episode! This details Christian's first encounter with the Jerkops! | |||
|
Sonichu 1 | Episode 4 | "Black Sonichu in "Darkness, Speed, & Lightning!"" | Dr. Eggman, Giovanni, Bill the Scientist | None | The origin of Blake! | |
| Episode 5 | "Sonichu in "Informal Meeting"" | None | None | Blake kidnaps Rosechu, Sonic and Sonichu run into each other, then team up. | |||
| Episode 6 | "Sonic & Sonichu "Black Metal Combat"" | Metal Sonichu | None | Sonic and Sonichu fight Eggman's latest creation - the Metal Sonichu! | |||
| Sub-Episode 2 | Christian Chandler in "The Rise & Fall of My Heart" | Hanna | Hanna | The comic version of Chris's encounter with Hanna. | |||
|
Sonichu 2 | Episode 7 | Sonichu in "Anchuent Prophecy" | Keeper of the Destiny Cave, Sarah Hammer, Wes Iseli, Ancient Leader of the Cherokee Clan | Keeper of the Destiny Cave | Chris takes over the story as his Sonichu medallion unleashes the power of the Anchuent Prophecy | |
| Episode 8 | Christian Chandler in "Chaos & Serenity" | Wes-Li Sonichu, Saramah Rosechu | None | The three empowered hedgehogs meet and fight | |||
| Episode 9 | Chris-Chan, Saramah, & Wes-Li in "The Evil that Stomped CWCville" | Count Graduon | None | Saramah breaks up with Wes-Li as Slaweel the Witch makes her first big attack on CWCville! | |||
| Sub-Episode 3 | Christian Chandler & Sonichu in "Witch Confront" | None | None | Chris and Sonichu confront Slaweel! | |||
| File:Issue3.jpg | Sonichu 3 | Episode 10 | "Sonichu Babies" | Wild Sonichu, Bubbles Rosechu, Magi-Chan, Angelica Rosechu, Punchy Sonichu, Boulder Dropping Whale, Sonee and Rosey, Nabe, Mypoe | Boulder Dropping Whale, Nabe, Mypoe | The origin of the Chaotic Combo! | |
| Episode 11 | The Chaotic Combo in "When Hedgehogs Meet" | Flame the Sunbird | Flame the Sunbird | Blake steals the Master Sunstone and the Chaotic Combo unite! | |||
| Sub-Episode 4 | Christian Chandler in "McAttack" | B-Manajerk, Merried Seinor Comic, Super Chris-Chan Sonichu, W-M Manajerk, Darkbind Sonichu | Super Chris-Chan Sonichu | Chris is attacked in the M-C-D-ville by two Manajerks! | |||
|
Sonichu 4 | Sub-Episode 1 | Christian Chandler in "Jerkop-tastropie" | None | None | Reprint from Issue 0 | |
| Sub-Episode 2 | Christian Chandler in "The Rise & Fall of My Heart" | None | None | Reprint from Issue 1 | |||
| Sub-Episode 3 | Christian Chandler & Sonichu in "Witch Confront" | None | None | Reprint from Issue 2 | |||
| Sub-Episode 4 | Christian Chandler in "McAttack" | None | None | Reprint from Issue 3 | |||
| Sub-Episode 5 | Christian Chandler in "McAttack part 2" | Crystal Weston Chandler (sister) | Ancient Leader of the Cherokee Clan | Crystal appears to save the day as the W-M Manajerk attacks! | |||
| Sub-Episode 6 | "Christian Chandler's Backyard Safari" | ScotPalazzo | None | Chris gives us an inside look at the Jerkops | |||
| Sub-Episode 7 | Christian Chandler in "Off-Target" | Bagget, Crackder | None | Bagget arrives to attack Chris! | |||
| Sub-Episode 8 | Christian Chandler in "Off-Target part 2" | None | None | Chris is taken captive, but is rescued by Crystal! | |||
| File:SchuComic6Cover.jpg | Sonichu 5 | Episode 12 | Christian Chandler in "My Best Friend's Cherokian Wedding" | William Spicer, Sailor Megtune, Megagi La Skunk | William Spicer, Sarah Hammer | Chris attends Sarah Hammer's wedding, which is spoiled by Wes-Li Sonichu. Chris, with the aid of Megan Schroeder, saves the day. | |
| Episode 13 | "Shattered Hearts & Entrapment" | DJ Jamsta | None | Slaweel initiates an attack on CWCville, leading to Crystal getting trapped in the mirror! | |||
|
Sonichu 6 | Episode 12.5 | "One Lucky Dog" | Patti-Chan | None | Chris's dog, Patti, is transported to CWCville and becomes a anthropomorphic dog with magic powers! | |
| Episode 14 | "Evil is Afoot!" | Naitsirhc as Reldnahc, Bionic the Hedgehog | None | Chris and the Chaotic Combo begin their quest for the Sonichu Balls as Reldnahc makes his appearance! | |||
|
Sonichu 7 | Episode 15 | Sonichu, Magi-Chan and Christian in "Time for a Ball" | Sammy, | Megan, | Chris learns the location of one of the Sonichu Balls and goes to get it | |
| Episode 16 | C.W.C. and Sonichu in "Time Hogs" | None | None | Chris and Sonichu retrieve the Sonichu Ball, only for Chris to be lost in the Time Void | |||
| "Tune in Everyday to Station KCWC for Everything!" | Blanca, Jiggliami | Blanca | DJ Jamsta interviews Blanca and Jiggliami | ||||
|
Sonichu 8 | Episode 17 | "Rage Against the Garbage" | Jason Kendrick Howell, The Incredible Lioness | None | After sex, Sonichu and Rosechu learn about 4-Cent_garbage and go to confront Jason Kendrick Howell over his work. They get a Sonichu Ball for their trouble | |
| Episode 18 | "Spring Break, 2008" | Silvana, Yawning Squirtle, Zapina, Simonla Rosechu | Yawning Squirtle, Jiggliami | Silvana makes her move as Jiggliami warns the others of her plans and they get another Sonichu Ball | |||
|
Sonichu 9 | Episode 19 | "Date Ed (Even Though the Idea Sounds Dated)" | Reginald, Layla, Ms. Jakaras, Rita Jakaras | Ms. Jakaras | THRILL to the wonder that is Chris's Dating Education classes! | |
| Episode 20 | "CWC-Defense" | Samurai Pizza Bots, Power Rangers | Most bad guys | The PVCC mount a massive attack on CWCVille! Chris is later pulled out of the Time Void | |||
|
Sonichu 10 | Episode 21 | Christian Chandler in "Director Amenities" | Clyde Cash, Jack Thaddeus, Lovely Weather, Asperchu, Chaotic Combo (Asperchu), Metal Asperchu, Asperpedia Four, Sandy Rosechu | Reldnahc, Jason Kendrick Howell, Asperchu, Clyde Cash, Jack Thaddeus, Chaotic Combo (Asperchu), Metal Asperchu, Asperpedia Four, Slaweel the Witch, homosexuality, asexuality, Simonla | Chris rains holy hell on all his enemies! | |
|
Sonichu 11 | ||||||
|
Sonichu 12 | ||||||
Unfinished and unreleased issues
These comics are not yet completed by Chris, and most of them were briefly seen in videos during the Ivy saga. Most of the unreleased comics were obtained by trolls and publicly released.
Unfinished
- Chris began work on a special Christmas episode in mid-December 2009, but aside from that, only a cover exists. The release date was announced for 17 March 2010. Since Chris is a lazy fatass, and also due to Surfshack Tito and The Wallflower, the pages were never released. On 24 April 2010, the Sysop uploaded pages by a troll.
- So far only a cover exists.
Unreleased
- Chris rescues Ivy from the clutches of Clyde Cash. Six known pages are available. The rest are unverified, but speculated to be those displayed in the video.
- The fail-tastic union of Chris and Ivy. The pages are not yet numbered, and text remains hand-lettered. A cover page is absent for this comic.
- The even more fail-tastic honeymoon of Chris and Ivy. This is technically still an unreleased issue as it was provided by The Miscreants (as jesuschrist.zip). It is in a similar state to Special 02: Pages have no numbers, text is still hand-written, and also missing a cover.
Chris has claimed that in total he plans to complete 50 to 100 issues in his life time.
- Sonichu #0 REMAKE
- Sonichu FINALE
- Sonichu the Audiobook Saga(tm)
- Sonichu: The Animated Series
- Sonichu: The TRUE and HONEST Comic Series
External links
- CWCipedia comic archive (Episode 20 updates included)
- TV Tropes article detailing everything wrong with Sonichu