Kellie Andes (Circa 2000).
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I REALLY missed out on that when I could have had the chance to take it.
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Chris, totally deluded[1]
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Kellie Lyn Andes (married name: Kellie Lyn Andes Stowel) was Chris's crush in high school that he met in sophomore year. They lost contact in mid-2001.[2] Today, Chris thinks he had a chance with her but blew it due to naïveté.[3] For whatever reason, Chris now considers her to be his High School Sweetheart, despite the fact that the term is usually reserved for people that are dating, and not for retarded man-children and the patient women that tolerate them.
Kellie is living proof of how sad Chris's life really is. In a sad, vain attempt to remind himself of how his life used to be, Chris has remained largely unchanged since high school (when he had the most female friends he'll ever have), while Kellie has actually moved on and gotten herself a job, husband and two children.
Kellie is out of my league cant you tell. C'mon I still wear shoes with velcro straps.
-Christian
Kellie on Chris
In recent correspondence Kellie confirmed that Chris is definitely not her type.
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I never liked Christian in that way. Christian is def. not my type nor has he ever been.
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Kellie, laying it down
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Considering she married a handsome straight guy who has good social skills, a deep voice, a muscular physique, and a job where he saves lives instead of mooching off welfare... then she isn't kidding. He also happens to be a niggo, but that has nothing to do with it.
Kellie is out of my league cant you tell. C'mon I still wear shoes with velcro straps.
-Christian
Gallery
Sauces
People
Family
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Immediate family
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Pets
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Other
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Acquaintances
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Hobbies
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Desired acquaintanceships
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Collaborators (creators Chris promoted)
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Women (cut ties with Chris)
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Gal-pals
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Staff
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Defense lawyers
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Prostitutes
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Trolls
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Fantasy enablers
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Catfishers (Internet/phone only)
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Catfishers (met with Chris)
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Trolls (internet-only)
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Trolls (internet-only, impersonating celebrities)
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Trolls (met with Chris)
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Allies
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A-logs
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Media personalities
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In media
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Template:Sweethearts