Joshua Martinez
| “ | Josh can't stand him, but Chris is always trying to hang out with him. I think Josh is the ONE man his age that he can stand being around. | ” |
| PodMonkey | ||
Joshua Martinez carpooled to James Madison University with his childhood friend Christian Weston Chandler. He attended for speech therapy due to his thick Spanish accent.[1] Apparently, the two hung out after school in Harrisonburg, where they would eat at a restaurant called Country Cookin and mull around an abandoned airplane.
First troll
Joshua is the first troll to pretend to be a woman to screw with Chris. He pretended to hook Chris up with a girl named Lori Lopez, chatted with Chris as her and sent him supposed pictures of her. These images were actually of Vanessa Hudgens. The truly hilarious part of this is he closes communication as her by confiding her love for Josh to Chris. Eventually Chris discovers that he was trolled, and (as he does about everything that happens to him) writes about it in his comic.
Chris counterattacks
After Chris discovered he was a lolcow, he tried diverting the attention from himself to Joshua with gems like the following edit to his ED page.
| “ | --- Look, pal, if you REALLY WANT to TAKE DOWN someone who HAS a REPUTATION, consider one JOSHUA MARTINEZ.
Ladies come a runnin' from at least as far as New York City to his house in Dyke, VA; not just any ladies, but STARS like Megan Fox, Jessica Alba, Jessica Biel, Jessica Simpson and plenty other whores. He also has been Piggy-Backing on the Stardom of Vanessa Hudgens; singing with her in her Latino Albums, and starring with her in various HBO movies, and even worse, TRANSFORMERS 2. He has her and some other gal named Brittany for BOTH HIS SIMULTANEOUS GIRLFRIENDS; DUAL Marriage in the works here. He's a more LUCKY S.O.B. than I can ever surmount to. RUIN HIS REPUTATION. Joshua Martinez. PS YOU DID NOT HEAR THIS WHOLE THING FROM ME. |
” |
| Chris thanking Josh for saving him $22.49 for a Nintendo Wii[2] | ||
Second troll
In early 2009, Josh served as a sort of Eastern Front for the trolling war on Chris, as he impersonated pop star Vanessa Hudgens of "High School Musical" fame.
The trolling culminated in Josh attempting to sell a special PSP to Chris for "Vanessa" yet trolls started to suspect that Josh was doing so for personal gain and not for the lulz. Furthermore, involvements with Vanessa were interfering with the success of Ivy, not to mention Josh isn't exactly too bright either and trolls aborted the operation. Josh's involvement ended and Chris canceled the check as instructed by Ivy, yet Chris refused to return the PSP because "Vanessa would be upset." It was retard vs. retard.
Josh has since stopped talking to Chris.
Not a ninja
Josh claims to hold a black belt in martial arts, but he is certainly not a ninja.
On 14 June 2009, Joshua Martinez was coming away from the Fashion Square Mall, when PodMonkey drove past him with his wife on their way out. So Josh, being inconspicuous as ever, turned his music up and tailed him to PodMonkey's destination, in the Woodbrook Shopping Center down the street. Thinking that he was being stealthy, Josh parked right behind PodMonkey and waited for him to come out. After 5 minutes, impatience sank in and he left, but not before causing a lulzy scene for those in the know. It is speculated that he was keeping tabs on PodMonkey for his friends in the FBI.
Sauces
See also
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