Daniel Weston

Portrait of Daniel Weston, c. 1623. Note the blank stare... Doesn't it remind you of a certain somone?

“	As a matter of fact, among my, uh, mother's side in the uh, ancestral traits *sighs* we have uh, we have been traced down to Daniel Weston, who was on the main--Mayflower voyage.	”
Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007

Daniel Weston is one of the people who Chris claims to be one of his illustrious ancestors, through whom he is descended from Anne Boleyn, whose only daughter died childless. He was, according to Chris, aboard the Mayflower, the ship that sailed the Pilgrim Fathers to America in 1620; however, according to all known passenger lists of the Mayflower, there was never a man named Weston aboard. Presuming against the fact that Weston did not exist and Anne Boleyn had no possible living descendants at the time of American colonisation, there is still no reason whatsoever why an Anglican English noble would flee Britain, let alone on the Mayflower (which was full of Puritans) in the first place.

There is a possibility that Chris actually meant to say Thomas Weston, an English merchant who funded The Mayflower, though this makes no more sense than the prior account. Chris later revised his theory that Daniel Weston was not on the Mayflower claiming that "he made his voyage later on." This highly nebulous revision is no more persuasive than the original account, and neither version of the story explains how he was descended from a queen who died childless.

These flatly impossible notions may have been concocted by Chris, or spoonfed to him by his mother to make him feel special. In reality, Chris's earliest known paternal ancestor was a hick named William Wynn, who had a grandson named Robert claimed to be a lecherous alcoholic (not Bob, but Bob's grandfather).

See also

• Anne Boleyn
• Ancient leader of the Cherokee Clan
• Barbara Chandler

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