Difference between revisions of "Cole Smithey"
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| '''Parents''' | | '''Parents''' | ||
| [[Barbara]] (mother)<br>[[Jack Dale Smithey]] (supposed father)<br>[[Ran Coleman Yeatts]] ( | | [[Barbara]] (mother)<br>[[Jack Dale Smithey]] (supposed father)<br>[[Ran Coleman Yeatts]] (actual father)<br>[[Jerry Harmon]] (stepfather)<br>[[Robert Chandler]] (stepfather) | ||
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| '''Occupation(s)''' | | '''Occupation(s)''' | ||
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{{quote|Let me know when that fuck [[Bob]] finally drops.|Cole | {{quote|Let me know when that fuck [[Bob]] finally drops.|Cole<ref>[[:Image:Cole 07-07-24-3.PNG|24 July 2007 email #3]]</ref>}} | ||
{{quote|I do not regret giving birth to Cole.|[[Barbara Chandler]]<ref>[[:Image:Cole_07-03-06-1.PNG|6 March 2007 | {{quote|I do not regret giving birth to Cole.|[[Barbara Chandler]]<ref>[[:Image:Cole_07-03-06-1.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 1]]</ref>}} | ||
'''Joseph Cole Smithey''' (born 24 July 1963)<ref>''[[:Image:046-ColeCDIn.jpg|A CD For Cole Smithey!]]''</ref> is [[Chris]]'s half-brother, [[Barbara Chandler|Barbara's | '''Joseph Cole Smithey''' (born 24 July 1963)<ref>''[[:Image:046-ColeCDIn.jpg|A CD For Cole Smithey!]]''</ref> is [[Chris]]'s half-brother, [[Barbara Chandler|Barbara]]'s first son, and lone escapee of the [[14 Branchland Court|Casa De Chandler]]. Despite sharing chromosomes with Chris and being raised by the same horrible mother, Cole leads a relatively normal life. [[Cole Smithey E-mails|Cole's emails to Chris]] revealed a lot of information about the Chandler family. | ||
==Life== | |||
==Childhood== | ===Childhood=== | ||
[[Image:RanColemanYeatts-WakeForestHowler1961.png|thumb | [[Image:RanColemanYeatts-WakeForestHowler1961.png|thumb|Cole's [[true and honest]] biological father, Ran Coleman Yeatts, from the 1961 Wake Forest yearbook. Notice the physical similarity.]] | ||
Cole grew up in Richmond, Virginia, near Virginia Commonwealth University and West Avenue.<ref | Cole grew up in Richmond, Virginia, near Virginia Commonwealth University and West Avenue.<ref>[[Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Retired life (0:16:59–0:24:22)]]</ref> As a child, Cole was physically and mentally abused by Barbara and his "stepfather" [[Jerry Harmon]] with punishments such as ass beatings, cold showers, and "bizarre scenarios."<ref name="email">[[:Image:Cole_07-03-06-2.PNG|6 March 2007 email, page 2]]</ref> | ||
Barb insisted that Cole's biological father was [[Jack Dale Smithey]], to whom she claimed she was married | Barb insisted that Cole's biological father was [[Jack Dale Smithey]], to whom she claimed she was married, but records show she wasn't.<ref name="email" /> Cole suspected and later confirmed the identity of his father to be [[Ran Coleman Yeatts]], who was introduced as a friend of the family and visited when Cole was a child. | ||
==Move to California== | ===Move to California=== | ||
Cole left | Cole left home for California, attended San Diego State University from 1981–84, and earned degrees in Dramatic Art and Music. He also attended Hartnell College and San Francisco City College in similar fields of study.<ref>http://www.linkedin.com/pub/cole-smithey/a/125/9aa</ref> While at college, he became the drummer for a Poway, California punk rock band called "The Rockin’ Dogs". The band lasted from 1981–85.<ref>The Rockin’ Dogs | ||
</ref>{{clear}} | </ref> | ||
===Present=== | |||
Cole currently lives in Manhattan and is a noted film critic who is featured on Rotten Tomatoes.<ref>http://www.rottentomatoes.com/critic/cole-smithey/</ref> He was mentioned once in Time Magazine for being one of the few critics to give a negative review to Toy Story 3.<ref>http://newsfeed.time.com/2010/06/19/can-147-critics-be-wrong-meet-the-two-pundits-who-trashed-toy-story-3/</ref> He occasionally hosts [[eBay]] auctions for the winning bidder to [[ego|spend a night drinking with him]].<ref>http://www.ebay.com/itm/Drink-Craft-Beer-in-NYC-with-Film-Critic-Cole-Smithey-/290715508352?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item43affe9e80</ref> | |||
{{clear}} | |||
==Relationship with Barbara and Bob== | ==Relationship with Barbara and Bob== | ||
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[[Image:0467-CWC18th20.jpg|thumb|Cole smiles alongside [[Barbara]] on Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday]].]] | [[Image:0467-CWC18th20.jpg|thumb|Cole smiles alongside [[Barbara]] on Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday]].]] | ||
Cole | Cole was not on good terms with [[Bob]] or [[Barbara]]. According to Cole, [[Bob]] worked his "bitter influence" on Barbara to separate her from Cole. He has "never met a meaner or more reprehensible Republican cur than Bob Chandler."<ref name="email" /> In multiple emails to Chris, Cole asks to be informed when Bob dies so he can celebrate.<ref>[[Cole Smithey E-mails]]</ref> | ||
Barbara continued to lie about the identity of Cole's biological father and related facts repeatedly, even on the night before Cole's wedding and even after Cole hired a private detective to find evidence | Barbara continued to lie about the identity of Cole's biological father and related facts repeatedly, even on the night before Cole's wedding and even after Cole hired a private detective to find evidence contradicting her claims. It turns out Barbara was never married to [[Jack Dale Smithey]], Cole's alleged father, but rather to [[Ran Coleman Yeatts|Ran ''Cole''man Yeatts]]. | ||
Barbara visited Cole only once in 27 years, whereas Cole had made special effort to visit her several times. Cole's wife's family treats him more like family than his own. | Barbara visited Cole only once in 27 years, whereas Cole had made special effort to visit her several times. Cole's wife's family treats him more like family than his own. | ||
{{clear}} | {{clear}} | ||
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Cole was not around when Chris was growing up. Being nineteen years older, he was in California making a life for himself. Cole said that Barbara and Bob neglected Chris for years with the [[abusive babysitter]], which suggests that Chris's muteness in early life was their fault. | Cole was not around when Chris was growing up. Being nineteen years older, he was in California making a life for himself. Cole said that Barbara and Bob neglected Chris for years with the [[abusive babysitter]], which suggests that Chris's muteness in early life was their fault. | ||
Cole visited for Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday party]] in [[2000]]. Later in the same year, for Cole's 37th birthday, Chris made him ''A CD For Cole Smithey!'' Naturally, the present had little to do with Cole and [[Chris and his Ego|everything to do with Chris]], even featuring a picture of | Cole visited for Chris's [[My big 18th party (story)|18th birthday party]] in [[2000]]. Later in the same year, for Cole's 37th birthday, Chris made him ''A CD For Cole Smithey!'' Naturally, the present had little to do with Cole and [[Chris and his Ego|everything to do with Chris]], even featuring a picture of Chris on the cover. Chris further taints the CD by trying to talk like a DJ. | ||
Chris visited Cole in California at some point, the only time Chris has been on an airplane<ref>[[Mumble 1]]</ref> and one of only two times that he has left [[Virginia]] (the other being his trip to Ohio to save | Chris visited Cole in California at some point, the only time Chris has been on an airplane<ref>[[Mumble 1]]</ref> and one of only two times that he has left [[Virginia]] (the other being his trip to Ohio to save [[Julie]]). | ||
In [[July 2007]], Chris sent an | In [[July 2007]], Chris sent an email asking for Cole's vote in the [[Chop Chop Onion's Rap Showdown|''PaRappa'' contest]]. In return, Cole asked Chris to find out the truth about his father from Barbara. The timing of this request was probably not a coincidence, as Ran Coleman Yeatts had died a month prior.<ref>[http://ssdi.rootsweb.ancestry.com/ United States Social Security Death Index]</ref> Chris did ask his mother about it, but she lied once again. Chris was more interested in the ''PaRappa'' contest than his brother's plight, showing just how [[Chris and his Ego|self-absorbed]] he truly is. This resulted in Cole becoming even more bitter towards both Chris and Barbara. Suffice to say, Cole did not vote for Chris. | ||
===Cole in the comics=== | ===Cole in the comics=== | ||
On the [[CWCipedia]] profile for [[Rosechu]], there is a "Professor Cole" listed as the one who gave [[Kel]] the [[Wikipedia:Pichu|Pichu]] who would become Rosechu. | |||
==Gallery== | ==Gallery== | ||
Revision as of 00:14, 11 July 2012
| Chandler Family | |
|---|---|
| |
| Cole Smithey | |
| Birth Name | Joseph Cole Smithey |
| D.O.B. | 24 July 1963 (age 48) |
| Gender | Male |
| Nationality | American |
| Race | White |
| Parents | Barbara (mother) Jack Dale Smithey (supposed father) Ran Coleman Yeatts (actual father) Jerry Harmon (stepfather) Robert Chandler (stepfather) |
| Occupation(s) | Film critic, musician |
| “ | Let me know when that fuck Bob finally drops. | ” |
| Cole[1] | ||
| “ | I do not regret giving birth to Cole. | ” |
| Barbara Chandler[2] | ||
Joseph Cole Smithey (born 24 July 1963)[3] is Chris's half-brother, Barbara's first son, and lone escapee of the Casa De Chandler. Despite sharing chromosomes with Chris and being raised by the same horrible mother, Cole leads a relatively normal life. Cole's emails to Chris revealed a lot of information about the Chandler family.
Life
Childhood
Cole grew up in Richmond, Virginia, near Virginia Commonwealth University and West Avenue.[4] As a child, Cole was physically and mentally abused by Barbara and his "stepfather" Jerry Harmon with punishments such as ass beatings, cold showers, and "bizarre scenarios."[5]
Barb insisted that Cole's biological father was Jack Dale Smithey, to whom she claimed she was married, but records show she wasn't.[5] Cole suspected and later confirmed the identity of his father to be Ran Coleman Yeatts, who was introduced as a friend of the family and visited when Cole was a child.
Move to California
Cole left home for California, attended San Diego State University from 1981–84, and earned degrees in Dramatic Art and Music. He also attended Hartnell College and San Francisco City College in similar fields of study.[6] While at college, he became the drummer for a Poway, California punk rock band called "The Rockin’ Dogs". The band lasted from 1981–85.[7]
Present
Cole currently lives in Manhattan and is a noted film critic who is featured on Rotten Tomatoes.[8] He was mentioned once in Time Magazine for being one of the few critics to give a negative review to Toy Story 3.[9] He occasionally hosts eBay auctions for the winning bidder to spend a night drinking with him.[10]
Relationship with Barbara and Bob
Cole was not on good terms with Bob or Barbara. According to Cole, Bob worked his "bitter influence" on Barbara to separate her from Cole. He has "never met a meaner or more reprehensible Republican cur than Bob Chandler."[5] In multiple emails to Chris, Cole asks to be informed when Bob dies so he can celebrate.[11]
Barbara continued to lie about the identity of Cole's biological father and related facts repeatedly, even on the night before Cole's wedding and even after Cole hired a private detective to find evidence contradicting her claims. It turns out Barbara was never married to Jack Dale Smithey, Cole's alleged father, but rather to Ran Coleman Yeatts.
Barbara visited Cole only once in 27 years, whereas Cole had made special effort to visit her several times. Cole's wife's family treats him more like family than his own.
Relationship with Chris
Ironically, Cole actually gets along much better with Chris than with either Bob or Barb (or at least he used to; it's unclear whether the two are still in regular contact), and possibly better than with any of his other direct relatives. Then again, when you don't actually know who your paternal relatives are, you have to take what you can get.
Cole was not around when Chris was growing up. Being nineteen years older, he was in California making a life for himself. Cole said that Barbara and Bob neglected Chris for years with the abusive babysitter, which suggests that Chris's muteness in early life was their fault.
Cole visited for Chris's 18th birthday party in 2000. Later in the same year, for Cole's 37th birthday, Chris made him A CD For Cole Smithey! Naturally, the present had little to do with Cole and everything to do with Chris, even featuring a picture of Chris on the cover. Chris further taints the CD by trying to talk like a DJ.
Chris visited Cole in California at some point, the only time Chris has been on an airplane[12] and one of only two times that he has left Virginia (the other being his trip to Ohio to save Julie).
In July 2007, Chris sent an email asking for Cole's vote in the PaRappa contest. In return, Cole asked Chris to find out the truth about his father from Barbara. The timing of this request was probably not a coincidence, as Ran Coleman Yeatts had died a month prior.[13] Chris did ask his mother about it, but she lied once again. Chris was more interested in the PaRappa contest than his brother's plight, showing just how self-absorbed he truly is. This resulted in Cole becoming even more bitter towards both Chris and Barbara. Suffice to say, Cole did not vote for Chris.
Cole in the comics
On the CWCipedia profile for Rosechu, there is a "Professor Cole" listed as the one who gave Kel the Pichu who would become Rosechu.
Gallery
A CD For Cole Smithey!
As if Barbara had any involvement with the CD.
Cole playing drums.
Sources
- ↑ 24 July 2007 email #3
- ↑ 6 March 2007 email, page 1
- ↑ A CD For Cole Smithey!
- ↑ Emily Date Conversation Transcript#Retired life (0:16:59–0:24:22)
- ↑ 5.0 5.1 5.2 6 March 2007 email, page 2
- ↑ http://www.linkedin.com/pub/cole-smithey/a/125/9aa
- ↑ The Rockin’ Dogs
- ↑ http://www.rottentomatoes.com/critic/cole-smithey/
- ↑ http://newsfeed.time.com/2010/06/19/can-147-critics-be-wrong-meet-the-two-pundits-who-trashed-toy-story-3/
- ↑ http://www.ebay.com/itm/Drink-Craft-Beer-in-NYC-with-Film-Critic-Cole-Smithey-/290715508352?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_0&hash=item43affe9e80
- ↑ Cole Smithey E-mails
- ↑ Mumble 1
- ↑ United States Social Security Death Index
External links
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