Difference between revisions of "BILLY MAYS"

From CWCki
Jump to navigation Jump to search
(Undo revision 211309 by PenisPenisBumBumJellyOttetMakesMeCum (talk))
Line 1: Line 1:
[[File:skeetanimehero.jpeg]]
{{Articleofthenow}}
{{quote|[[Metal Gear Solid|NO VICTORY, NO DEFEAT. THE SURVIVOR WILL CARRY ON THE FIGHT. IT IS OUR DESTINY.]]|BILLY MAYS's final statement to the CWCki}}


{{infobox
| title = Billy Mays
| image = [[Image:SirWilliamMaysOBE.jpg|250px|center]]
|header1  = Information
|label1  = Name
|data1    = William Darrell Mays
|label2  = Date of Birth
|data2    = 20 July 1958
|label3  = Date of Death
|data3    = [[June 2009|28 June 2009]] (aged {{Age|1958|7|20|2009|6|28}})
|label4  = Gender
|data4    = Male
|label5  = Nationality
|data5    = [[United States|American]]
|label6  = [[Chris and race|Race]]
|data6    = White
|label8  = Occupations
|data8    = Pitchman<br>Mayor of [[CWCville]]
}}


'''BILLY MAYS''' (20 July [[Pre-1980#1950s|1958]] – 28 [[June 2009]]) was a [[TV]] advertising man turned [[Internet]] [[troll]], and a true [[Miscreants|patriot]], as well as the [[true and honest]] Mayor of [[CWCVille]] from [[March 2009|3 March 2009]] until his untimely and [[Death threats|highly]] [[28 October 2011|suspicious]] death. Provided both epic [[lulz]] and wisdom in [[Sonichu (IRC chat)|#Sonichu]] and on [[PVCC (message board)|PVCC]] during his noble lifetime. He was famous for his signature ALL CAPS style.


Skeet is the god of eternity at the McSpanky's fast food restaurant. Skeet calls everyone, "dude," and claims to be smart, but others see him as dim-witted. However, McSpanky's came to life and tried to destroy every other food joint and Skeet did not run away. When the restaurant was shot at the sun, the Space Bandits found the place and turned it into a spaceship. Believing that Skeet was the one responsible for this awesome technology, they vowed to find him and exploit his great wisdom, which they never did, for some reason.
__TOC__


Skeet, initially called upon as Skeetui Yoshimato, was raised in an exceedingly poor rice village in southern Koyushu. His grandfather was a war trained assassin who was tasked to eliminate U.S operatives. Although Skeetu's grandfather was Japanese, he was fluent in American English. This is why "Skeet" sounds like a typical American teenage boy. After many years of vigorous katana training on Mt. Fuji, Skeet traveled to the United States of America in hopes of beginniing a new life, honoring his ancestors in the process. Skeetui wanted to experience the American Dream, and thought working in fast food would be a good place to start. So, after moving to Retroville, Skeetui earned a job position as the cashier at McSpanky's. Soon, through hard work and dedication, he became employee of the month. This was an achievement unparalleled by any employee of McSpanky's. When Jimbo and two of his friends walked in and talked about getting a job at the restaurant, Skeetui made a seemingly irrational move by hiring the boys. However, Skeetui was a man who wanted to give these younger children an opportunity to straighten themselves out. Initially, two of his new employees worked well considering their age. However, Jimbo gave Skeetui trouble in a now-notorious incident in which Jimbo claimed to be smarter than the cash register, therefore stating he didn't need to use it. But, the cash register is used for tracking purposes, validating Skeetui's discontent with Jimbo. Later that night, Jimbo would sneak into McSpanky's and would commit vandalism by changing the interior to appear futuristic. As if this weren't the worst case, Jimbo also attached rockets to the restaurant, launching it into the air. As the restaurant was taking off, Skeetui was bravely saving the lives of men, women, and children alike by line backing them off the premise. However, time was very limited, causing the demise of our hero who, soon after, ascended into godhood. 
{{clear}}


  === Trivia ===
==History==


Skeetui was originally more powerful in the manga. However, he was nerfed to dish out less damage per second in the anime, as for Jimbo fans would complain.  
[[Image:SchuComic9P31.jpg|thumb|250px|Chris desecrated the memory of BILLY MAYS by portraying him with Sonichu on his shirt. Note how many fingers he has.]]
Some look up to Skeetui as the Profit, and is thought to be the messiah that will return one day.
 
Skeetui roughly translates to "sperm whale", according to fan translations.
===Mayoralty===
It can be observed that Skeetui's main catchphrase is "dude".
His first order of business was "ADULT PARTYING", and promised that everyone will go home [[Episode 18|smokey]]. He stated that "THE ROADS WILL POUR CHEAP [[Reeb|BEER]] AND CARTONS OF CIGARETTES", noting that the poor citizens of [[CWCville]] deserve a week of "DRUNKEN STUPOR". During his short reign as mayor, BILLY MAYS instituted several groundbreaking reforms and was loved by all, with a record-breaking 99% approval rating.{{cite}} Sadly, CWCville's era of prosperity was quick to end after only a few months.
 
===Murder===
On 28 [[June 2009]], BILLY MAYS was found dead in his mansion in [[Wikipedia:Tampa, Florida|Tampa]], where he resided after suffering several assassination attempts by various hitmen, allegedly under the employ of [[Christian Weston Chandler]]. The true cause of his death is unknown, but his death was suspiciously close to [[Clyde Cash]]'s apparent death on 22 [[May 2009]].
 
In [[Captain's Log, Stardate July 1st, 2009]], Chris claims he didn't kill BILLY, but rather that BILLY was a victim of a fatal heart attack. In [[Rollin' and Trollin']] (17 July 2009) Chris talked about the construction of the BILLY MAYS Tower in [[CWCville]] as a memorial to his dead bodyguard.
 
{{clear}}
 
==In ''Sonichu''==
 
In [[Sonichu 9|''Sonichu'' #9]], BILLY MAYS fails to free [[Ivy]]<ref>[http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Issue_9/Page_92]</ref> when she is strangled by elevator wires. The slickness of the walls keeps him from climbing up them to save her. However, the walls of text and general bad writing led to some confusion and the belief that he also died in the comic.
 
In Chris's [http://archive.sonichu.com/cwcipedia/index.php?title=Character_Bios Biography Page] on the [[CWCipedia]], he lists BILLY MAYS as a "[[Chris and English|non-cannon]]" character, despite his appearance in central episodes of Chris's comics.
 
==Post death==
[[Image:BILLYMAYSPEAKS.jpg|thumb|BILLY's message from beyond]]
 
In his [[Rollin' and Trollin']] video, Chris laments the death of his "bodyguard" BILLY MAYS, and announces the near-completion of the BILLY MAYS Tower. That a skyscraper could have been constructed so quickly after BILLY MAYS's death is suspicious, and many CWCville residents believe Chris arranged the building of the Tower as a way to launder [[money]] stolen from his parents' credit cards, and that the naming of the Tower is nothing more than a publicity stunt to leech off of BILLY MAYS's [[Chris and his Ego|popularity]].
 
==See also==
 
*[[Chris-chan_Discusses...#Chris-chan_Discusses..._Billy_Mays|Chris-chan Discusses... Billy Mays]] - Chris discusses his involvement with BILLY's death with Guru Larry.
 
==References==
<references/>
 
{{People}}
 
{{CWCipedia|chris=billy_mays}}
 
{{DEFAULTSORT:MAYS, BILLY}}
[[Category:Dead]]
[[Category:Trolls]]

Revision as of 14:11, 13 September 2017

“ NO VICTORY, NO DEFEAT. THE SURVIVOR WILL CARRY ON THE FIGHT. IT IS OUR DESTINY. ”
BILLY MAYS's final statement to the CWCki
Billy Mays
SirWilliamMaysOBE.jpg
Information
Name William Darrell Mays
Date of Birth 20 July 1958
Date of Death 28 June 2009 (aged 50)
Gender Male
Nationality American
Race White
Occupations Pitchman
Mayor of CWCville

BILLY MAYS (20 July 1958 – 28 June 2009) was a TV advertising man turned Internet troll, and a true patriot, as well as the true and honest Mayor of CWCVille from 3 March 2009 until his untimely and highly suspicious death. Provided both epic lulz and wisdom in #Sonichu and on PVCC during his noble lifetime. He was famous for his signature ALL CAPS style.

History

Chris desecrated the memory of BILLY MAYS by portraying him with Sonichu on his shirt. Note how many fingers he has.

Mayoralty

His first order of business was "ADULT PARTYING", and promised that everyone will go home smokey. He stated that "THE ROADS WILL POUR CHEAP BEER AND CARTONS OF CIGARETTES", noting that the poor citizens of CWCville deserve a week of "DRUNKEN STUPOR". During his short reign as mayor, BILLY MAYS instituted several groundbreaking reforms and was loved by all, with a record-breaking 99% approval rating.[citation needed] Sadly, CWCville's era of prosperity was quick to end after only a few months.

Murder

On 28 June 2009, BILLY MAYS was found dead in his mansion in Tampa, where he resided after suffering several assassination attempts by various hitmen, allegedly under the employ of Christian Weston Chandler. The true cause of his death is unknown, but his death was suspiciously close to Clyde Cash's apparent death on 22 May 2009.

In Captain's Log, Stardate July 1st, 2009, Chris claims he didn't kill BILLY, but rather that BILLY was a victim of a fatal heart attack. In Rollin' and Trollin' (17 July 2009) Chris talked about the construction of the BILLY MAYS Tower in CWCville as a memorial to his dead bodyguard.

In Sonichu

In Sonichu #9, BILLY MAYS fails to free Ivy[1] when she is strangled by elevator wires. The slickness of the walls keeps him from climbing up them to save her. However, the walls of text and general bad writing led to some confusion and the belief that he also died in the comic.

In Chris's Biography Page on the CWCipedia, he lists BILLY MAYS as a "non-cannon" character, despite his appearance in central episodes of Chris's comics.

Post death

BILLY's message from beyond

In his Rollin' and Trollin' video, Chris laments the death of his "bodyguard" BILLY MAYS, and announces the near-completion of the BILLY MAYS Tower. That a skyscraper could have been constructed so quickly after BILLY MAYS's death is suspicious, and many CWCville residents believe Chris arranged the building of the Tower as a way to launder money stolen from his parents' credit cards, and that the naming of the Tower is nothing more than a publicity stunt to leech off of BILLY MAYS's popularity.

See also

References

  1. ↑ [1]
    People

v • d • e  
Family
Immediate
family
Pets
Other

v • d • e  
Acquaintances
Hobbies
Desired acquaintanceships
Collaborators
(creators Chris promoted)
Women
(cut ties with Chris)
Gal-pals
Staff
Defense lawyers
Prostitutes

v • d • e  
Enablers
White knights
Fans

v • d • e  
Christubers and Interviewers
Christubers
Interviewers

v • d • e  
Trolls
Fantasy enablers
Catfishers
(Internet/phone only)
Catfishers
(met with Chris)
Catherine • Emily • Faeryn • Hanna • Kacey
Trolls
(internet-only)
Trolls
(internet-only,
impersonating celebrities)
Trolls (met with Chris)
Allies
A-logs

v • d • e  
Perceived enemies
Staff
Jerkops
Manajerks
Other

v • d • e  
Imaginary/Inanimate
Imaginary friends
Inanimate objects

v • d • e  
Media personalities
In media
CWCipedia logo.png
For Truth and Honesty, see the archived CWCipedia page on BILLY MAYS
Retrieved from "http://sonichu.com/w/index.php?title=BILLY_MAYS&oldid=211332"