Chris and writing

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While Chris has not shown his skills as a writer too often, he has nevertheless shown what he has been capable of through his outlandish webcomic, through several ill-guided blogging attempts and through several short pieces of fiction and poetry.

Chris as a poet and lyricist

See also: Chris and music

Chris' lyrics vary from acceptable for the sort of cheesy tie-in music used with certain franchises he is a fan of usually written by D-list hack writers, to hilariously awful, full of painful rhymes giving us lines such as "if no girl comes, I'll break my arm."

His poetry, however, is much worse. It's abysmal, consisting in one assault after another on the English language. Painful rhymes are even more present than in his songs; other times, he breaks the mood of the poem to throw in some of his trademark random-access humor. Chris also tends to use rather dated language in his poetry, not unlike in his written messages to his fanbase; however, it is not "how do I love thee" dated which is generally acceptable, but the sort of mushy language used in Valentine's Day cards like the ones kids hand out in elementary school, or perhaps the dialogue on many old television shows. This is especially evident in his poems "Valentine's Day Hymn" (which is not a hymn, or any sort of song at all, as it lacks both a discernible tune and any sort of rhyme or meter scheme) and "Saddest Heart in the World."

Chris and short fiction

Chris as a comic writer

See also: Chris and art, Sonichu comic

Lack of cohesive script

Like all forms of narrative art, a comic needs a script. No one who writes serious comics keeps the scripts in their heads; most comics are scripted either in very rough sketch form, or textually, or both. When discussing the video game plans, he said his game ideas are in his head, and he'd probably say the same about the comic. If Chris has a grand plan for the comic, he's using the same "pure gold on first try" mentality as in everywhere else.

Textwalls and unreadable bubble layouts

An example of Chris' mind-boggling ability to make a completely unreadable page

As far as dialogue writing goes, aside from no proofreading and editing, Chris's biggest sin is textwalling. Characters just can't shut up at times, and this leads to Chris forgetting that comics are meant to show the readers things, and not turn into inconveniently typeset novels without any of the requisite bits of narration and scene-setting. He has absolutely no organization to his speech bubbles, sometimes forcing readers' eyes to jump all over a page to try and put together what he was trying to say, including using numbers to disclaim the flow of a conversation. This is despite the wide availability of speech bubble creation software on the Internet, where neat and organized text is placed within a bubble after the fact, allowing even the most amateur of artists to script on the side and focus much more on the art by setting aside the bubble space, but worrying about the layout of text later in the creative process.

When Chris draws his comic pages, he draws them while attempting to squish EVERYTHING onto the page. He leaves nothing to the imagination as he will try to show everything that has happened on one page. One of the earliest examples of this can be seen with Sonichu 0 with the Pikachu running into action at the same time Sonic turns into Super Sonic and attacks Perfect Chaos. Where most comics tend to have six panels of action at most, Chris slams in a whopping 10 panels onto the page. The end result of trying to cram as much action as he can is an amazing mess, unable to tell what is going on on a certain page. The manhandling of the material is a symptom that, once again, speaks of lack of planning, preparation and refining-based approach.

Kudzu plot

Newer issues, written under incresing troll pressure, also introduces one big problem: Chris likes to put in tributes to "fans", and those plotlines never go anywhere. Leaving loose strands was a problem with Chris's work earlier (Just what the hell happened to the Metal Sonichu, anyway?) but it has really amplified in the recent works. Sometimes, Chris realises his plot is getting weird and out synch with all of those brilliant plans in his mind, and fixes the kudzu plot with a giant machete. Chris has no energy or creativity to properly fix hastily introduced characters - and when he does fix them, it's not pretty.

Jiggliami and Blanca appear in Sonichu 8; they serve very little purpose besides making a quick appearance, and Jiggliami making a discovery that helps the good guys defeat the bad guys' plans. In real life, Chris had been betrayed by the evil troll, and in the fateful September 11th, claimed Jiggliami as his character. After Jiggliami and Blanca had made their appearance, Chris shoos them off the comic. That is not passive neglect of the characters: he literally says that Jiggliami went away and had a successful career elsewhere.

Indeed, if there's a literary equivalent of rape, this is as close as it will ever get. After Chris's and Blanca's "break-up", Chris used her character just to spite Blanca and then tossed Jiggliami on the wayside. Chris could have used his "original" characters in this episode with no foul done to anyone, but Chris insisted using Jiggliami in this comic. If this had been a parody of Jiggliami and the evil troll Blanca (as was done to Jimmy Hill in Sonichu 10 preview), this might have been appropriate too. A regular comic writer might have said "goddamn it, I've been trolled, I can't use any of this rubbish that the trolls made." But not Chris; he claimed Jiggliami and Blanca as his own characters and used them in a comic like he would have used any of his own characters, then threw them away in cold blood.

In another gruesome example of fixing up tangled trolling plots, Ivy was introduced in Date Ed episode of Sonichu 9, while she was still Chris's girlfriend. No doubt this was intended as a major plotline, but not at all surprisingly, it never came to the fruition. After romantic start, Ivy was not mentioned in the following episode at all, except for a brief mention that she died off-screen in a gruesome way.

Chris as a blogger

Sauces


See also

The writings of Chris-Chan

Poetry: "Valentines Day Hymn" | "For My True Love, I Would…" | "Hard Love Quest" | "I Want a Girlfriend for Christmas" | "Saddest Heart in the World" | "Song of Christian" | "Sonichu's Ode to Rosechu" | "An Inspired Poem for Jackie" | "PAIN Enduring since October 29, 2013" | "Ride or Die" | "Weston Haiku"

Prose: "How the Pokémon Came into Our PokéBalls" | "A Week With Christian Chandler" | "My big 18th party" | "Bionic the Hedgehog" | "Sonichu & Rosechu… The Genesis of the Lovehogs" | Sonichu's News Dash | "Chris + Sarah's Life-Shares" | "Story of My Current Days" | "The High School Story" | "A Sonichu and Rosechu Christmas Story" | Chris's Response to the Terrorism Attacks in Paris | Chris's letter to Cathy Weseluck | Chris's letter to Kelly Sheridan | "The Awakening of a CPU, AKA The Idea Guy Corruptions" | THE DIMENSIONAL MERGE IS HAPPENING NOW! | Sonichu Journal Pages | Whispering Spell (Restore Magic) | Dimensional Barrier Shatter Spell | SNT Vs Sonichu 2.5-Plus | Jail letters

See Also: Signature

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