CWCville

“	I'm still the mayor of CWCville. There is no elections.	”
Chris-chan Discusses...

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“	The city of CWCville, a vibrant community with happy people, cool chicks and a frustrated male...	”
Narrator, Sonichu #2

CWCville (pronounced: [kwɪkvɪɫ], "quick-ville") is Chris's imaginary world, created from a combination of his twisted views on the world and pop-culture to work as a place where he can hide away from the hardships of reality and make all his wishes, ideas, and deranged fantasies become true.

Overview

The toys that started it all.

Sonichu and Rosechu's welfare housing in relation to the rest of CWCville (note their postal code is the same as Chris's birthday and its address is nearly identical to his real address).

A slightly more detailed (but no less disproportionate) drawing of CWCville.

CWCville is the setting of Sonichu, a city in Virginia of which Chris is Mayor-for-Life. CWCville is where Chris portrays friends and enemies from his real life in scenarios altered to reflect his bias toward himself. As his ideal metropolitan community, CWCville illustrates Chris's poor understanding of how a city actually functions. Like everything else that appears in his comic, Chris believes CWCville to actually exist in a parallel universe. Chris has claimed to be mayor of CWCville "IN REAL LIFE." As an entity Chris believes to be real, CWCville is a coping mechanism used to compensate for his unsatisfying actual life.

It has been argued that the unconquerable quality of Chris's ego stems from the fact that he can retreat to his own CWCville world, where he can right all wrongs done to him. In his comics, we see him defeating Mary Lee Walsh, with whom he holds an IRL grudge, beating around the Jerkops, and bringing his dead dog, Patti Chandler, back to life in the form of the anthropomorphic Patti-Chan. The main reason Chris can do such superhuman acts, such as defeating a whole army of huge Jerkops and resurrecting his dead dog, is due to the fact that in CWCville, his will is supreme. This serves as a blanket that protects his physically and mentally weak self from the outside world, where he holds no such power.

Chris is greatly concerned by people who are misinformed about any detail of CWCville, or conclude that it is anything but "a clean, secure, orderly and safe city." After being coerced into declaring BILLY MAYS the new Mayor of CWCville, Chris repeatedly stated that this was not true. Chris seems to think that anyone who understands what CWCville is like will love it.

The seeds of CWCville were planted early into Chris's life. At some point, Chris put all of his completed LEGO kits, original LEGO creations, and various handmade Sonichu items together on one table in his room. In February 2011, Chris claimed to have finally disassembled the LEGO model, but he insisted that the city "still stands strong today within my own mind and hands."

The first official CWCville media was made in 2001. After toying with more phonetic spellings, Chris settled on "CWCville" in 2003. This spelling consecutively features the initials of his full name and its pronunciation must be explained to others, indicative of CWCville's nature as a self-serving and insular fantasy.

Chris has repeatedly associated CWCville with Charlottesville, VA, likely the largest and most familiar urban environment in his life. Chris has presented footage of Charlottesville as footage of CWCville. He has stated that CWCville is as important and worthy of respect as every American city that begins with "C", but mentioned only Charlottesville by name, calling it "the most important one" of these "C-Villes", as if Chicago, for example, was less important than Charlottesville. CWCville is said to have an annual Dogwood Festival, also an annual Charlottesville tradition. This association further illustrates Chris's narrow perception of the outside world.

However, a map in Sonichu #0 shows CWCville as being near Pallet Town and Giovanni's Gym in Viridian City, featured in the Pokémon series and located in Kanto, an area based on the Kantō region in Japan. It is also located near Station Square, found in Sonic the Hedgehog's world.

Given Chris's humongous ego, it's surprising that he didn't give himself a whole country to begin with, or better yet, a whole fucking planet. He later created the land of RuleCWC, an idiotic Hyrule ripoff, but he actually let someone else rule it.

Name

One of Chris's homemade Pokémon cards featured a "Cwick City Gym", while an unfinished Game Boy Camera project dating from 2001 used the spellings "Cwicville" and "Cwickville". A sign on the door to his room reads "Christian W. Chandler's Cwickville City Gym". It is unknown why he changed the spelling. Likely the alternate spelling just didn't stimulate his massive ego as much as his unaltered initials, even if it makes a lot less sense. (Although Christown, Chandlerville, etc. would have been just as good and made a lot more sense.)

Without knowing the "correct" pronunciation of the name, the fact remains that "CWCville", unlike any proper English word, begins with four consonants in a row. Using conventional phonology, the name is pretty difficult to utter, unless you're Welsh, in which case it would be pronounced "cookville".

Government and politics

“	And for your information, my City's politics are of a King/Queen thing; NO VOTING	”
Chris, explaining the totalitarian state to Samantha Thaddeus.

The great dictator director on his throne

Map of CWCville area. Notice how Sonic's house is bigger than the entirety of Pallet Town. Also, if you look at Station Square, you'll notice Chris's obsession with the World Trade Center. Note how Chris needs an arrow pointing to himself.

According to Sonichu #8, CWCville was founded in 1982 by Chris's father, Bob Chandler. Why he would name a city after his deadshit son is unknown. And only GodJesus knows why it wasn't called RFCville, as all records of Mayor Bob's mayorship — in fact, all symbols of the old regime — have been erased (like the Roman practice of damnatio memoriae, where all records of a traitor (statues, inscriptions, etc.) are erased after his death). It is unknown if Bob died before passing CWCville over to his son, as he has yet to be seen/mentioned in the comic.

According to the Samantha Thaddeus e-mails, the government is a "King/Queen thing" for which there is no voting. The non-elected leader does what he pleases as Mayor-for-Life with supreme power, "advised" by an elected House of Representatives which sits at the CWCville Trade Center Building. The right to vote has "even" been extended to those of African descent (though apparently not to women, as some women are seen protesting in order to gain suffrage in CWCville). Despite allowing elections for Board of Director Members, Chris shows that they still hold no authority, existing as a purely advisory committee which the Mayor is not obligated to listen to. For example, he does not discuss attacking the 4-cent garbage.com building with them, he just tells them the "game plan" as a fait accompli.

Artist's depiction of CWCville's beloved Mayor.

This is what a typical city looks like after being nuked. (Note the "SS" runes.)

The Mayor attempts to dissuade accusations of dictatorship, citing that dictatorships are never hereditary, whereas he inherited the town from his father, even though many dictatorships are hereditary.

Chris originally planned to hand over the role of Mayor to his sister Crystal in Sonichu #10, but later decided not to. On 3 March 2009, Chris announced that BILLY MAYS was the new Mayor of CWCville. The next day, Chris revoked his edict that made MAYS the new Mayor, establishing a government-in-exile in his bedroom. Most legal scholars, however, argue that since Chris was not wearing the Medallion, which Chris has indicated is necessary for a video to be TRUE and HONEST, his statements to the contrary are false and therefore not legally binding, meaning BILLY MAYS was still the Mayor of CWCville. On 28 June 2009, BILLY MAYS died in his mayoral mansion, allegedly due to a cocaine overdose, but the hand of Chandler was suspected. The city was plunged into mourning. Chris wasted no time in seizing control of CWCville, announcing during a post-coup interview that he was always the ruler and that there would be no further elections.

The Mayor addresses his people

The police don't take orders from the civil authorities and lock people up at random and the dean of the only college is leading a hopeless resistance and is vilified in the mayoral-controlled press. Soliciting sex is legal in CWCville, whereas possession of tobacco is a very serious offense. Alcohol was illegal until 2009, when the ban was rescinded. Laws have been enacted to persecute homosexuals, and psychic surveillance is used to monitor sexual purity. This constant Orwellian surveillance, which is obviously done under the guise of "protecting" the citizens, flies completely against the basic human right to privacy. Since there is no plausible way to oversee or contest a super-powered official, it also effectively elevates the official above law. The Mayor has also hinted that the Electric Hedgehog Pokémon, a group of civilian defense contractors, have immunity from prosecution. This goes against the concept of supremacy of law that is the very foundation of modern societies; some sociologists have pointed out that this is in fact the hallmark of all police states.

Despite all this perceived military and law enforcement might, the police and mercenaries demonstrably offer little real protection or competence: troublemakers like Wes Iseli ruin weddings with near impunity, and the dissident leaders remained at large until recently.

The court system is a joke. Walsh was captured, depowered, and sent to a maximum security prison without a trial. The Jerkops and Manajerks are depowered, yet were supposedly allowed to go scot-free. However, when Simonla Rosechu was murdered by a Voltorb, four people - Evan, Alec Benson Leary, Sean, and Mao are arrested and put on trial not even a week after, despite earlier receiving a public pardon from the Mayor. The judge is biased in Chris's favor, when all judges should be impartial. Sean is permitted to defend himself and his fellow co-defendants, despite being clearly under the influence of drugs. Nobody suggests appointing a public defender for the four. The prosecutor adds on to the charges, considering slander via the Asperpedia (which was destroyed by Chris) punishable by death, when it is a mild offense in most jurisdictions. Evidence gathered using Magi-Chan's psychic powers is considered admissible in court. When the four are found guilty by a clearly biased jury, they are immediately executed in cruel and inhumane ways.

CWCville also pays for the TrollBusters' private jet.

Economy

CWCville currency

CWCville runs under a command economy which Chris has near-total control over: the radio station and soft drink company are named after the Mayor, which indicates either nationalization of normally private businesses or rampant cronyism. The banning of goods that the Mayor disapproves of has also contributed to the city's financial troubles. Tobacco, unhealthy as it may be, is illegal to sell, possess or consume, despite the multibillion dollar value of the industry, which by all reasonable analysis, means it is very likely one of the single most-smuggled contraband items into CWCville writ large, fetching black marketeers windfall profits.

CWCville also mints its own currency, which comes in confusing denominations - there are two coins: the C-Quarter and W-Quarter, ten C-Quarters equaling one W-Quarter, indicating that Chris has no idea what "quarter" means. The W-Quarter is round and golden in color, with a silver-colored rim and the letter "W" in red in the center, while the C-Quarter is C-shaped and blue, with a silver-colored rim. Fines are levied in U.S. dollars, for unknown reasons: perhaps to add to the foreign currency reserves of the tottering dictatorship.

As of Christmas 2009, ten homeless shelters have been set up: Chris himself claims that these ten-story "soup hotels" house a population of 900-1,800 indigents, and come equipped with free cable TV. The Mayor's personal friends, such as Sonichu, live in state-sponsored, suburban housing. He also supplied furniture for Wild Sonichu.

Chris claims that the city has "a lot of jews and immigrants, like new york," and is on the stock exchange.

See also

• CWCville Shopping Center
• CWCville Mayoral Office

External links

• onetruecwcville.net
• CWCVille Chronicles
• CWCville Mayor Campaign 2010
• CWCville's National Anthem

Locations in the CWCverse

CWCville: Main sights (map): CWCville City | CWCville Park | CWCville Mall (CWCville Mayoral Office | Full list of stores) | Jungle/Mountain Areas (Chameleon Cult Jungle Dojo | Wild Sonichu's Treehouse) | Subdivision Areas (14 Brunchville Lane) | Target Mini-Marts | Walmart Mini-Marts Other places of note: Billy Mays Tower | Bolyn High | CWC-Cola Bottling Company | CWCee Dees | CWCville Beach (Pier 969) | CWCville Baptist Church | CWCville General Hospital | CWCville Studios | CWCville University | Cwick-Circuit City | Cwick City Gym | Double-CWC Hotel | KCWC | Layla's Apartment | Local Coffee Shop | Pokemon Center | Samuel Memorial United Christian Church | Sarah's Apartment Complex | Simonla Rosechu's Rabbit Hole | True Blue St. (CWCville Police Dept. 11th Precinct) Environs (map): Giovanni's Gym/Base | Kel's House | Pallet Town | Sonic's House | Station Square | Zapbud Fields The Axis of Slaweel: Clarksville, Tennessee (4-cent_garbage.com HQ) | Cly's Mansion | Dark Mirror Hole | Doctor Robotnik's Base | Get-Tar Region | Giovanni's Gym/Base | Mal-Wart Region (M-C-Dville) | The Moon | Private Villa of Corrupted Citizens (High School District) | Sho-Mall Region (Fa-Square) | Viridian City Other places: Destiny Cave | Mysterious Rainbow Island | Mysterious Mountain | Nabe's Dojo-Shin | New Island | The Ocean | Parodyse Isle | RuleCWC | Time Void