Difference between revisions of "Anne Boleyn"
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{{quote|And I do think I Am Entitled in a True, Valid Relationship with a woman very much like you, because I Need The Love, and not only that, but I Am Of Royalty in the [[Daniel Weston|Weston]] Bloodline.|Chris to [[Catherine]], 14 December 2014<ref>[[Catherine E-mails]]</ref>}} | {{quote|And I do think I Am Entitled in a True, Valid Relationship with a woman very much like you, because I Need The Love, and not only that, but I Am Of Royalty in the [[Daniel Weston|Weston]] Bloodline.|Chris to [[Catherine]], 14 December 2014<ref>[[Catherine E-mails]]</ref>}} | ||
[[Image:Anne boleyn.jpg|thumb|Chris's alleged | [[Image:Anne boleyn.jpg|thumb|Chris's alleged progenitrix. Perhaps her bloodline resulting in [[Sonichu]] was why she was called [[Mary Lee Walsh|a witch]].]] | ||
'''Anne Boleyn''' ([[Pre-1980#Pre-1900|c.1501/1507–1536]]) was Queen of [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|England and Ireland]] as the second wife of [[Wikipedia:Henry VIII of England|King Henry VIII]]. [[Chris]] claims to be a descendant of her from his [[Barbara|mother]]'s side of the family, via a certain [[Daniel Weston]] who was purportedly on the [[Wikipedia:Mayflower|''Mayflower'']].<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]]</ref> | '''Anne Boleyn''' ([[Pre-1980#Pre-1900|c.1501/1507–1536]]) was Queen of [[Tito Got No Luck Against We Brits, Irish and Scots!|England and Ireland]] as the second wife of [[Wikipedia:Henry VIII of England|King Henry VIII]]. [[Chris]] claims to be a descendant of her from his [[Barbara|mother]]'s side of the family, via a certain [[Daniel Weston]] who was purportedly on the [[Wikipedia:Mayflower|''Mayflower'']].<ref>[[Captain's Log, Stardate November 7th, 2007]]</ref> Chris [[Chris and English|cannot even spell "Boleyn"]].<ref name="IRC 22 December 2008">[[IRC (22 December 2008)]], [[Mailbag 47#Begone]], [[MySpace messages#Jalena]]</ref> It is unknown whether or not Chris and Barb plan to produce evidence of their ancestry and topple the current royal [[Wikipedia:House of Windsor|House of Windsor]]. | ||
History buffs may notice a problem with this; namely that aside from the fact that Daniel Weston never even existed, Anne Boleyn had only one daughter, [[Wikipedia:Elizabeth I of England|Queen Elizabeth I]]. It is impossible for Chris to be descended from her, or indeed for anybody to be; Elizabeth I was childless and was in fact famously known as the [[virgin with rage|Virgin Queen]]; Chris's home state of [[Virginia is for Virgins|Virginia]] is named in her honor. | History buffs may notice a problem with this; namely that aside from the fact that Daniel Weston never even existed, Anne Boleyn had only one daughter, [[Wikipedia:Elizabeth I of England|Queen Elizabeth I]]. It is impossible for Chris to be descended from her, or indeed for anybody to be; Elizabeth I was childless and was in fact famously known as the [[virgin with rage|Virgin Queen]]; indeed, Chris's home state of [[Virginia is for Virgins|Virginia]] is named in her honor. The only conceivable way would have been through an illegitimate child, who by definition could not be royalty. It is admittedly possible for Chris to be ''related'' to Boleyn, though no evidence whatsoever so much as suggests this. | ||
Current evidence suggests that Barb gave Chris this idea, which seems likely as he's been rambling about his ancestry for years, even before his discovery by the Internet. In August [[2005]], he tried to impress a girl on [[MySpace]] with this "fact" because she was interested in royalty.<ref>[[MySpace messages#Jalena]]</ref> This may have been this ridiculous notion's first outing, but it was not to be the last - as recently as 2014, in the [[Rental House Tour]], Barb and Chris bored Catherine and Cousin Al to tears with a completely fictitious account of how the Westons are considered royalty to this day, and that she and Chris were "blood kin" to Queen Elizabeth I. | |||
Current evidence suggests that Barb gave Chris this idea, which seems likely as he's been rambling about his ancestry for years, even before his discovery by the Internet. In August [[2005]], he tried to impress a girl on [[MySpace]] with this "fact" | |||
In late [[2008]], Chris deduced (or more likely decided) that he is descended from [[Wikipedia:Mary Boleyn|Mary Boleyn]] (Anne's [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|sister]]),<ref name="IRC 22 December 2008"/> her brother [[Wikipedia:Richard Weston, 1st Earl of Portland|Richard Weston, 1st Earl of Portland]], born 1577),<ref name="ReferenceA">[[Captain's Log, Stardate May 3rd, 2009]]</ref> and later [[Wikipedia:Earl of Portland|Earls of Portland]].<ref name="IRC">[[IRC (31 December 2008)]]</ref> Chris had looked up Richard Weston and Mary Boleyn on [[Wikipedia]] to find a link between them<ref>[[Mumble 1]]</ref> which fortifies the view that Chris and Barb [[List of Chris's lies|made the whole thing up]]. There is admittedly a possibility that his family tree loops back on itself, but it's [[Virginia|probably a good deal more recent than the Tudor period]]. | In late [[2008]], Chris deduced (or more likely decided) that he is descended from [[Wikipedia:Mary Boleyn|Mary Boleyn]] (Anne's [[Crystal Weston Chandler (sister)|sister]]),<ref name="IRC 22 December 2008"/> her brother [[Wikipedia:Richard Weston, 1st Earl of Portland|Richard Weston, 1st Earl of Portland]], born 1577),<ref name="ReferenceA">[[Captain's Log, Stardate May 3rd, 2009]]</ref> and later [[Wikipedia:Earl of Portland|Earls of Portland]].<ref name="IRC">[[IRC (31 December 2008)]]</ref> Chris had looked up Richard Weston and Mary Boleyn on [[Wikipedia]] to find a link between them<ref>[[Mumble 1]]</ref> which fortifies the view that Chris and Barb [[List of Chris's lies|made the whole thing up]]. There is admittedly a possibility that his family tree loops back on itself, but it's [[Virginia|probably a good deal more recent than the Tudor period]]. | ||
Revision as of 10:40, 3 February 2018
| “ | And I do think I Am Entitled in a True, Valid Relationship with a woman very much like you, because I Need The Love, and not only that, but I Am Of Royalty in the Weston Bloodline. | ” |
| Chris to Catherine, 14 December 2014[1] | ||
Anne Boleyn (c.1501/1507–1536) was Queen of England and Ireland as the second wife of King Henry VIII. Chris claims to be a descendant of her from his mother's side of the family, via a certain Daniel Weston who was purportedly on the Mayflower.[2] Chris cannot even spell "Boleyn".[3] It is unknown whether or not Chris and Barb plan to produce evidence of their ancestry and topple the current royal House of Windsor.
History buffs may notice a problem with this; namely that aside from the fact that Daniel Weston never even existed, Anne Boleyn had only one daughter, Queen Elizabeth I. It is impossible for Chris to be descended from her, or indeed for anybody to be; Elizabeth I was childless and was in fact famously known as the Virgin Queen; indeed, Chris's home state of Virginia is named in her honor. The only conceivable way would have been through an illegitimate child, who by definition could not be royalty. It is admittedly possible for Chris to be related to Boleyn, though no evidence whatsoever so much as suggests this.
Current evidence suggests that Barb gave Chris this idea, which seems likely as he's been rambling about his ancestry for years, even before his discovery by the Internet. In August 2005, he tried to impress a girl on MySpace with this "fact" because she was interested in royalty.[4] This may have been this ridiculous notion's first outing, but it was not to be the last - as recently as 2014, in the Rental House Tour, Barb and Chris bored Catherine and Cousin Al to tears with a completely fictitious account of how the Westons are considered royalty to this day, and that she and Chris were "blood kin" to Queen Elizabeth I.
In late 2008, Chris deduced (or more likely decided) that he is descended from Mary Boleyn (Anne's sister),[3] her brother Richard Weston, 1st Earl of Portland, born 1577),[5] and later Earls of Portland.[6] Chris had looked up Richard Weston and Mary Boleyn on Wikipedia to find a link between them[7] which fortifies the view that Chris and Barb made the whole thing up. There is admittedly a possibility that his family tree loops back on itself, but it's probably a good deal more recent than the Tudor period.
In May 2009, Chris also cited his ancestry as one of the reasons for Wikipedia to have an article on him.[5] In the comics, Zapina is said to be studying at "Bolyn High",[8] probably named in reference to Anne Boleyn.
References
See also
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