Cousin Al
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Troll disclosure: This persona was created, appropriated, or otherwise used by trolls to manipulate Chris. Though this identity is contrived, the CWCki may treat it as if it were a real identity because it was to Chris. (It's also funnier that way.) |
| “ | Chris, there are a lot of artists out there in the world, and even some of the greatest artists out there who have published, have millions of fans—they still get criticism. Because with every, all art, there’s gonna be someone who doesn’t like it. And you know what, those artists, they can just ignore the criticism… | ” |
| Al confronting Chris about using autism as an excuse for lack of motivation. | ||
| Cousin Al | |
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| Information | |
| Name | Cousin Al |
| Also known as | Al Big Al skyraider91 garbageraider |
| Gender | Male |
| Known for | Raiding the Chandler's garbage to retrieve Chris's old High School assignments |
| Nationality | American |
| Occupation | Internet troll Dumpster Diver |
| Other relatives | Catherine Sorrentino (cousin) |
| Saga | Catherine |
Cousin Al, formerly known on the CWCki Forums as skyraider91, was an associate of the troll sweetheart Catherine who, as suggested in the name, roleplayed as her cousin. He is best well-known for raiding Chris's garbage in order to collect his old Manchester High assignments following his house's destruction from a fire. This would earn him his username being changed to "garbageraider" by moderators when he posted his findings on the Kiwi Farms (initially the CWCki Forums at the time). [1]
To accomplish this, Al would be involved in a conversation between Chris and Catherine during a date at Applebee's, which would ultimately lead to Chris inviting both him and Catherine to his charred up house. Following from there, Chris would give a tour of the remains of the house to both Al and Catherine, though the video became lost to time due to the original account it was posted on being terminated. No archives of the video are known to exist.
Post-House Fire Invite
In-person meeting with Chris
- Main article: Catie Date Conversation Transcript
On August 2014 31st of 2014, Cousin Al accompanied Catherine on her date with Chris at an Applebee's restaurant. The audio of their meeting was recorded and later posted. After Catherine introduced them, Al told Chris that he had come because Catherine needed a ride. The trio talked about a variety of topics for a while, Cousin Al often asking Chris to elaborate on what he meant when Chris' answers were too vague or confusing. At the end of their date, Al helped Catherine to develop an excuse for why Chris couldn't come back with them to wherever they were staying. Chris then invited the pair to come and visit his recently charred house, to which they obliged.
House Tour
- Main article: IRL Tour of 14 Branchland Court
They followed Chris back to his home and upon arriving, began conversing about the fire. While exploring the property, Al would ask Chris questions about things around his yard and details about the fire. After their tour, Catherine made up an excuse about a mechanic who needed them to come pick up her quickly due to a family emergency. Al told her that he could give her a ride and the two left shortly after.
Rental House Tour
- Main article: Rental House Tour
Al again accompanied Catherine on another outing with Chris, this time to their rental house that they were staying at while their home was being renovated. At this outing, Al met Chris' two dogs and Barb. He referred to himself as "Big Al" while introducing himself to Barb. They toured around different parts of the house, most notably Chris' playroom and bedroom. Like during most in-person interactions, Al did most of the question asking. During the second part of the video, the trio listened to Barb talk about various topics, such as when Cole almost died form an infection and about the recent house fire. Catherine and Al left shortly after Catherine had made up an excuse about needing to catch a flight to Chicago. This interaction like most others was recorded in an audio only format and then later uploaded.
Bowling Outing
Al joined Catherine and Chris at a bowling outing and wrote two emails about the experience:[2]
| I and Catie met up with Chris at a bowling alley and we talked and bowled a single game of bowling. We were there about an hour. After that, we went to a local buffet to eat and talked at length in one of the booths. Finally, we drove over to the rental house, said hi to Barb briefly, and went upstairs and briefly played PS3 with Chris. After that, we left.
Notes- The original Sonichu pages are still entirely intact, all of them. I asked Chris is he would be willing to sell them, he said no, then said that if he ever did decide to sell them, that he would want "thousands of dollars" for each issue. Chris still considers Catie his girlfriend even though she explicitly told him that now they were just friends. Chris mentioned that in 2010 that he used to attend a young adult social group and go bowling with other members of the group. He mentioned meeting "his girlfriend *Censored*" (the wallflower) at the group. Chris talked contemptuously about other special ed types in the group, but said that if he had a child that was intellectually disabled, (retarded) that he would be OK with that child and still love it. Evidently, Barb has told Chris that the reason that Cole doesn't like Barb is because Cole allegedly hit his head when he tripped on a school bus sometime between the ages of 4-7. This allegedly gave Cole lifelong mental and physical problems. Also, Cole allegedly has a bad hip. The last time Chris/Barb saw Cole is person was at a Weston family reunion in 2004. The Chandlers almost got evicted from their rental house today, because the insurance company decided to not pay the rent for December. Barb came up with the $1600 to pay the rent by taking out a loan against the title on the van. Chris thinks that they will be back in 14 BC by the 10th to 17th of December. When he said this in front of Barb, she spoke up and said something to the tune of "that ain't happening" to "you're being very optimistic". Also, Barb is going over to 14 Branchland Court regularly during the weekdays to oversee the construction, and has apparently been trying to boss around/micromanage the construction crews. According to Chris, the reason that their paperwork took so long to process for the rebuild on 14 BC is because the person doing it was old, "in their 60's" and was "a senile slow in the mind". Chris is aware that "the game place" is out of business. When asked about how he felt about that, he tryed thinking for a minute, then said that he didn't know. Chris was fired from Wendy's back in 2001 because he drew a deliberately ugly picture of an older, female coworker as a Pokémon on a napkin. He says that he and his coworkers and his manager had emotional issues and didn't get along. Chris also claims that he was wrongly blamed for making a baby cry when the baby and its parents were eating at the restaurant. Chris stated that the inheritance that he and Barb received after Bob died was on the order of tens of thousands of dollars. Chris maintained that most to all of the inheritance was spent on legal fees after the events of 27 October 2011 [sic]. Chris recalls Barb throwing money at the problem, burning through funds paying Rob Bell to fight for their innocence, Barbara being stubborn and unwilling to accept a "guilty" plea in court. Evidently, at some point, barb either ran out of money or accepted that no amount of money spent in lawyer's fees would equal an innocent verdict in court. When asked about when his social security started, he stated that he didn't remember, then stated that he thought it had been a very long time-since before he started school. When asked if he was receiving the tugboat during high school, he said that he didn't remember. He stated that the only benefits that he got for his autism were the tugboat and a parking sticker for his car. He then smugly stated that he "gets those benefits because he's special" and sat there proud of his proclamation, as if awaiting a pat on the back. There's a lot more. I was wearing the recording rig, but the mic was under my heavy jacket, so I don't know what audio quality we got. I'll review the audio tomorrow and post more if I can. |
| Chris was always floating right around her, clingy as hell. He even tried giving Catie a goodnight kiss, after she told him explicitly that they were just friends. Chris has no sense of personal space or boundaries. It's like she'll tell him to keep his distance, but the thought won't stay in his head for longer than five minutes and then he's hovering too close again. I personally think that he's autistic and just doesn't gauge personal space well, but that's just my theory.
When asked about where he saw himself in 5 years, Chris said, "you know, I've had a lot of people ask me that question, and I just don't know, I never have" or something to that effect. Chris specifically admitted that he can earn up to $900 a month before losing any of his welfare money. I pointed out that there are many felons, disabled people, and high school dropouts who manage to find work, and said to Chris that if he'd been searching for work for almost ten years but hadn't found any, that he should either try harder to find a job, or perhaps enroll in a program that finds employment for people with disabilities. Chris didn't seem to like the thought, and I then asked him if his pride was preventing him from finding work. I pointed out that it would help his financial situation to find work, and asked him if his mother would support him finding work. Chris said "yes, my mother would support me finding work, but. . . " so I asked him what the problem was. He stated that he didn't emotionally feel prepared to be away from his mother as long as working full time would necessitate. I pointed out to Chris that he could work part time, and in the local area. I also pointed out that if he was employed, he would be able to better take care of himself after his mother passes away, and pointed out that he was over 30 years old. I asked him what he was going to do after his mother passed away, and he said that he didn't know. I pointed out to Chris that there are communities in the united states that are more LGBT friendly then rural Virginia, such as San Francisco, or Seattle. I also pointed out that the job market and government benefits/welfare are much better in both of those locations, pointing out that San Francisco has the highest minimum wage in the United States, and that he could earn more money there. Chris's response to this was, "but there's no San Francisco in Virginia". After informing Chris that I was talking about San Francisco, California, I asked him if he thought moving there was a good idea and he said no, because he didn't want to leave his mother. I asked him if anyone else could take care of his mother for him, mentioning his half-brother Cole and Aunt Harriet by name, but Chris said no, that they wouldn't take barb in. I asked Chris if he would consider moving out of Virginia after Barb dies. Chris flatly stated that he didn't feel comfortable moving to anyplace else, period, although he acknowledged the potential benefits of living in a different location in the United States. Chris paid $9,000 for the 2010 ford focus sedan, and he said that the payment is "one-hundred something" a month. He said that the interest rate on his loan was only 5%, and that the auto dealership was having a special deal the week that he bought the car. I don't know how accurate those numbers are, but that's what he said. When asked, Chris said that he does not know his credit score, or "care much for that". |
It was also at this outing that Al had gifted Chris a 3DS copy of Sonic Boom[3].
Stalking of the Chandler residence
Under his alias Skyraider91, Al would sometimes stop by the Chandler's residence to take photos of the property and then upload them for fellow trolls. On June 2014 15th of 2014, Al decided to take advantage of the recent house fire to obtain some of Chris' homework papers and other documents, which he later uploaded. On November 2014 25 of that same year, he returned to the home to share its latest renovation developments.
Director's Cut Leak
On December 18th of 2014, Al uploaded the second part of the Chandler Family Christmas 2004 video. This was said to have been apart of Chris' "directors cut" of the Christian Weston Chandler...Yep, I'm on TV :) video, which Chris had gifted to Catherine. Chatherine most likely forfeited this clip after having received it from Chris.
See Also
External Links
Cousin Al's Kiwi Farms profile
References
 Catherine Saga
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| The Players: | The Games: | The Prizes: |
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| Coinciding Sagas: Sonic Boom | ||
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