Megan Schroeder
| “ | Ah, For Her I Would travel even A Thousand Miles, just to be with her. Fortunately, she lives only about one hour from my house, and I meet her once a week at a closer-to-home social. This feeling, It was, and still is, so pure and true, it was like as if I was Born to Love Her. When She Smiles, I feel like I'm Walking on Sunshine as I give my replying smile and gaze into her eyes. And her hair is the softest and most warm-tingling. Cloud Nine? I feel like I'm on Ten. | ” |
| Christian, Story of My Current Days | ||
Megan Schroeder (born 23 July 1986) was a friend, and maybe even what could be considered a true friend, of Christian Weston Chandler's, who appeared in the scene in 2005 and cut off contact with Chris around 2008.
Prologue
- Main article: Megan Emails, 2005-2006
| “ | During the late summer months, I picked up and started the Yu-Gi-Oh Trading Card Game (it was around the time the movie came into theaters). One Saturday at the Game Place (Where I was also going for Pokemon TCG on Fridays), I met Megan and John Schroeder. At first I thought they were a couple but then they were just Sister and Brother. Over the months of getting to know Megan, I grew fond of her. Although at that time, and up to now, she wasn't interested in a lovely relationship. I've bided to her wishes and requests. I am truly fond of her, and I hope she will have a change of heart soon. She'll be turning 21 on July 23, 2007. | ” |
| Christian, Yep, I'm on TV :) | ||
Megan is a typical truly boyfriend-free girl; asexual even, with a few eccentricities that Chris was more than happy to copy and fulfill, namely her fondness for My Little Pony, Sailor Moon, and using Chris like a debit card because she was too lazy to go on eBay herself.
Megan and Chris first met during the summer of 2005 at The GAMe PLACe over a game of Yu-Gi-Oh!. The two apparently struck up a friendship of sorts. They had an obvious connection from the start, since they're both NEETs, idling their twenties away playing games marketed to pre-teens. It only took a few games of cards and a handful of emails before Chris saw Megan as his sweetheart. This was probably perpetuated by the fact that Megan used him as means to buy stuff off of eBay.
| “ | Please can you get this video for me? please hurry! thanks! | ” |
| Megan, Megan Emails | ||
Through the end of 2005 and into 2006, Chris would hang all over Megan, writing her into his comic, trying to drag her into dates, trying to snuggle, hold her hand, and kiss her, and other creepy actions. This didn't accomplish anything but rousing the ire of Megan, who wanted nothing more than her personal space away from our hero. Even more so, she only saw him as a friend, nothing more. She repeatedly tried to assert her asexuality. Sadly, this fell on deaf ears, and Chris would continue hounding Megan. When Megan attempted to use reverse psychology on Chris, deciding to say that she had a boyfriend, it didn't deter Chris from his ultimate goal of china.
And that was only the beginning...
Megan Saga
Sailor Megtune
- Main article: Sailor Megtune
Megan is a bit of an amateur cartoonist herself, and that caught Chris's fancy early in the game.
| “ | Everytime I see your drawings, I get inspired to want to work more on my comics. | ” |
| Christian, Megan Emails | ||
In what was a fortunate alignment of his ass-kissing campaign with the now consistent diary-keeping that Sonichu had become, Megan (later retconned as Meg-chan) quickly made her first appearance as Sailor Megtune in Sonichu 5 along with Megagi La Skunk, her own lesbian furry sidekick. The two are purportedly "Sailor Soldiers" and reveal on the spot that Chris is an old friend of theirs (Chris knew Megagi?) and thwart the evil Jerkops trying to ruin Chris' Love Quest with Rockin' Hurricane, causing Magic Rocket to blast off again. Her influence on Sonichu is apparent in Chris's sudden transition to a more animu style with Sonichu 5, most notably in his character's eyes.
Megan and Chris appeared to chat about comics in their email conversations; Chris critiques some of her story ideas, and runs plotline for Sonichu 6 by her, including a bizarre offer to write in Megan's own imaginary daughter. While Megan probably found the whole thing harmlessly eccentric at first, Sonichu 5 managed to create some drama pretty quickly upon its release. Megan undoubtedly flipped when she saw her character snuggling up with Chris AND offering fan service to the audience. Chris failed at understanding her anger, but did retcon a couple pages to tone them down.
Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown
- Main article: Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown
In June 2007, Megan went to Kentucky, Chris continued e-mailing her, refusing to back away even for a moment as he STILL believed that, deep down inside, Megan truly did love him. Discovering about the Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown and the prizes that laid within, Chris eagerly entered the contest, hoping to win a PSP and the trip and use that to win her heart. tl;dr, Chris lost, Adam Stackhouse won, Megan didn't give a shit. Even when Chris began whining about how everyone "cheated", especially Adam, but he "didn't", she didn't care. It soon got to the point where Megan would finally blow up at Chris for his childish and selfish acts. Despite being hurt, Chris continued to harass Megan.
Rule 34 and The End of Megan
- Main article: ShecameforCWC.JPG
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In November, Chris would discover his Encyclopedia Dramatica page and begin his one-man war against the garbage. In the process, he uploaded a number of Rule 34 artworks, one of which was a picture of him fingering a girl with her eyes obscured. Trolls originally believed that she was his imaginary sister Crystal, but Chris would eventually reveal that the image was actually meant to represent Megan.[1][2]
By 12 March 2008, Megan discovered the picture and demanded that it be removed immediately. Chris attempted to do so, but found himself blocked at every turn. His edits were quickly reverted, or even worse, compounded, as he tried to upload other versions of the picture with the face cropped out or obscured.
Throughout the fiasco, Chris attempted to paint himself as a greater victim than Megan, initially even assuming that she didn't understand what was going on in the picture. He would later admit he did it in part to suppress the occasional impulse to rape her, and that trying to assert that what she was going through just BEING in the picture and learning what he could have done was NOTHING compared to the misery of the trolling he was enduring. In the end, Megan finally broke off all contact with Chris, broken by her experiences and traumatized by his actions.[3][4]
Epilogue
| “ | Too bad I was never just that too all into him. | ” |
| Cartoon Megan, I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC | ||
| “ | Megan... WHY?! | ” |
| Christian, I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC | ||
Megan surfaced again in Chris's thoughts in July 2009, first in the CWC "Boyfriend" video, and then in the subsequent update, I Am The TRUE, Original CCWC.
Chris also reposted the Chop Chop Master Onion's Rap Showdown entry, though this version is slightly different from the ones frequently seen in latter days: After "...my friend Megan!", Chris inserted a short break with a photo of him and Megan, with a lovely heart frame. Either this is the original version before Chris tried to clean up his image, or a brand new version with new improved references to the long-lost love.
On 26 March 2009, he released a Captain's Log where he told everyone to "leave her alone" because she was going through stress from the trolls, and threatened to stop drawing the comic if they didn't
On 12 August 2009, he dedicated a song to Megan in one of his KCWC Top 10 Dedication Special videos, where the first sign that he'd convinced himself that she'd told him "I Love You" comes up (and he remains relatively consistent when speaking of her in acting as though this actually happened).
| “ | Coming up next at #7, we got another long-distance dedication, to the old gal-pal of mine that I almost had a ra- I had meant to be- I had her "I love you" before I got kicked out, Megan Schroeder, her, from her favorite, this is from her favorite h-artist, Yngwie Malmsteen. | ” |
| Christian, KCWC Top 10 Dedication Special | ||
Gallery
Art by Megan
Megagi La Skunk. The pose in this and the following few drawings is quite obviously traced from the same source.
Hound Howl, which Chris reused as "Canino the Houndhowl" in the Wedding Comic.
"Ace of Clubs"; Megan's original design for Patti-chan, until Chris stole the design.
Art of Megan
KINDA OF A GOKU-GET-EM ATTITUDE. :)
THAT IS NOT CRYSTAL
Miscellaneous
References
 Megan Saga
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| The Players: | The Games: | The Prizes: |
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| Coinciding Sagas: Stackhouse, GAMePLACe, ED | ||
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