Car Pranks

On August 2 2009, a hero posted Chris's 94 Ford Escort for sale on Craigslist.

Seven months later, a trio of BEST FRIENDS FOREVER contacted Chris, expressing interest in purchasing his car and offering their Hex Boxes to sweeten the deal. Apparently, autists don't know a good deal when they are given one, and Chris rejected all offers, no matter how innocent, with either rage or his super-egotism.

The voicemail greeting on Chris's cellphone also appears in the recording. In it he states that he will not take part in any interviews or documentaries under the advice of his "patholosist and lawyers". He also tosses a warning at any trolls who might be callin'. It is not known when Chris recorded this greeting, nor whether it has been updated since.

Nick Dunbar (0:00 - 0:44)

Chris: [Clipped from start] -o?
Nick: Hello, is uh, is this Chris?
Chris: Uh, yes, this is uh Christian Chandler, how may I help you?
Nick: Hi, um, I'm calling in regards of your Craigslist ad, it says here that you're selling a '94 uh Escort for 400 dollars?
Chris: That's uh, that, that is a fake ad, somebody else put that up there without my consent as a prank.
Nick: Are you sure?
Chris: I will-
Nick: Are you sure?
Chris: Yes I am pos-, I am 100 percent positive. It's a fraud. Somebody else put it up there. I've already sent a complaint to Craigslist. So, go somewhere else for a car.
Nick: Are you sure I can't convince you otherwise sir? I mean I have a-
Chris: [Chris raises his voice] I AM SURE.
Nick: You're sure. I have a perfectly good Xbox 360 right here, right next to me-
Chris: SHUT UP!
Nick: Oka- excuse me sir?
[Chris hangs up]

Voicemail Greeting (0:45 - 1:17)

Chris: Hello. You have reached the cellphone of Christian Weston Chandler. I'm sorry I could not answer right now, but please leave your name message, telephone number, and I'll get back to you as soon as possible. And I was advised heavily by publicist and my lawyers, to not do any interviews or a documentaries whatsoever. Even in-. Because I got so much reputation and at stake(?), at the current time. Also if this is a, uh, troll trying to troll me back. Do you think how much trollin'(?) stupid? I'm not trollin' stupid, you're trollin' stupid. Have a good day. [BEEP]

BlueSpike (1:19 - 2:11)

BlueSpike: Hey there is this Mr Chandler?
Chris: Uhh yes it is.
BlueSpike: Good evening sir. I'm calling regards to the Craigl-Craigslist about the '94 Escort?
Chris: Ah. That, that thing has was put up there, it was a fake. I have not put that up there myself. Somebody's using my name my address and it's just- it's just a prank, it's not real.
BlueSpike: Alright, no-no reason to get all, upset about it sir.
Chris: [unintelligible response]
BlueSpike: I have uhh, a pretty good condition Xbox.
Chris: III am serious. It is not for sale. It never will- [phone breaks up] for [break]. And would you think I would give up my car for a blatantly stupid Hex Box? Hex, H-E-X.
BlueSpike: Yes I can spell sir. Do you prefer the PlayStation 3?
Chris: I'm not selling my car, good night.
BlueSpike: But it was my brother's and now he's dead.
[Chris hangs up]

Jack Thaddeus (2:12 - 2:42)

Jack: Hehe Hi there! I'm sorry to bother you this evening buddy but is this Mr Chandler?
Chris: Uh yes it is. May I help you?
Jack: I heard you have my bike. A '94 Ford bike? I'll trade you an Xbox for my bike.
Chris: Ahh the car is not for sale, that ad was a fake-
Jack: I said bike!
Chris: -for sale, put up as a joke-
Jack: I said bike! I need to have that back.
Chris: -it has my address and my name on it. It was a joke. My car is not for sale, good bye.
Jack: This isn't a joke buddy! My bike!
[Chris hangs up]

External Links

Audio download

Listen to them on YouTube!

    Chats and calls