BlueSpike PSN Chat 4
In this recording, Chris reveals that Barb has a low opinion of his Internet friends and demands that her son fetch her drinks. Chris, being Chris, neglects his mother and forces her to do things for herself.
Don't miss Chris displaying a rare moment of clarity when he expresses incredulity at Julie forgetting what degree she had earned, an 'I see what you did there' moment involving a German phrase and Chris describing what provoked his...um, naval response.
Julie: What are you doing?
Chris: I was just about to, uh, check the BBC channel so I can digitally record tonight's episode of Monty Python.
Julie: Ah, alright.
Julie: So, um...
Julie: You were going to read the letter, weren't you?
Chris: Yeah. You want me to read it on the, uh, YouTube.
Julie: Um, well I wasn't going towards that, but I guess you can read it on YouTube if you want.
Chris: Well you mean you're not forcing me to?
Julie: No, I'm not forcing you to, but I'd really like you to read it on the YouTube.
Chris: Alright. (partially inaudible, sounds like 'I didn't get it.')
Chris: Oh! (clattering, overlapping loud noises) Oh, I, uh, my father wanted me to ask you, uh, how are you on your education level? What's the highest you've accomplished so far, or are you still going to college?
Julie: I finished college.
Chris: Oh, you finished it?
Chris: That's good. What degree did you get?
Julie: I forget. I'm too lazy to check, I'm sorry.
Chris: You forgot what degree you got?
Julie: Yeah, it's been been kinda like...I dunno, I have a short term memory span.
Chris: Oh. So it's like you got to have things written down for ya sometimes, huh?
Julie: Yeah. I'll look it up later, though.
Chris: OK. So was it...it was a college over in Molvanîa, wasn't it?
Julie: Wait, I finished high school. I'm sorry. I'm tired.
Chris: Oh. Oh, you finished high school?
Julie: Yeah, I haven't gone to college yet, I'm sorry. I'm kinda tired, I forgot.
Chris: It's okay.
Julie: My mind was a blur.
Julie: What about you? You went to community college, didn't you?
(A woman's voice can be heard, may be Barbara's.)
Julie: What do you think about--
Chris (interrupting): You're like 24 years old, right?
Julie: Nah, I told you, I'm 19.
Chris: Oh, you're-you are-you are 19?
Julie: Yeah, I told you, remember?
Chris: Yeah. I thought you-I realize you were either 19 or 24.
Chris: I guess I was mistaken, my bad.
Julie: That's alright. So what did you think of the pictures?
Chris (sing-song): You sent the navy.
Julie: Hm. (chuckles)
Chris: Seriously though, I loved the pictures.
Julie: Thank you.
Chris: I love to finally be able to know what you look like.
Chris: I'm gonna tape the letter and your pictures onto card stock and put it in a plastic sleeve so I can, uh, better preserve it for my future reference.
Chris: Oh, uh, can your friend send me a copy of the file-the picture files in an email so I can, like, have them digitally? 'Cause I want to make a couple of them my, uh, wallpapers on my PSP and my PS3.
Julie (puzzled): What? Oh, yeah. Oh, my friend. I'll try and ask. Yeah.
Julie: I think they're stuck on her computer right now.
Chris: Yeah. I kind of estimated that. That's why I said to ask her.
Chris: Do you wa-do you want-would you like to talk to my father some tonight?
Julie: Uh, no, not tonight.
Chris: Okay. I thought of a way of how I can get my mom up here if you want to-if you still want to meet her.
Julie: Um, sure. Alright.
Chris: Alright. Hang on just a moment here. Here's the uh, here's the dillio on what I'm gonna do to get my mom up here. I'm gonna move the camera so it's angled to the couch, you know?
Julie: Well Chris, you don't need to bring her up here you can just give her the headset, couldn't you? I can talk to her on there.
Chris: Hmm. Yeah. You see, I offered her that and she refused that twice, you know, so it's best to bring her up here.
Julie: Me-I don't think...I dunno.
Chris: It'll be alright.
Julie: I'm really nervous. I don't think I want to, I'm sorry. I'm just kind of nervous.
Chris: Just kind of nervous. Well, I can understand that.
Julie: Thank you.
Chris: I respect ya. And I love you.
Julie: Hmm. So, wait, what got on ED?
Chris: Oh! Yeah, a couple of au-there were some audio files that were extracted from a couple of past chats with Panda on the Skype. Including where I described the, uh, my idea of first-first sexual intercourse.
Julie: Oh. There's nothing of ours on there, is there?
Chris: By the way, this is before I met 'cha when these were record-and whatcha say?
Julie: There's nothing of ours on there, right? I don't want any trolls getting a hold of that.
Chris: Hmm. I dunno, but I hope there isn't anything of ours over there.
Julie: I can check, if you want.
Chris: Yeah, that might be a good idea.
Julie: Alright. I'll check right now.
Julie: So, anything you want to talk about while I check?
Chris: Uh, let me see. My father wanted to know what your highest school education was.
Julie: It was high school.
Chris: Yeah. It was a high school over in Molvanîa, wasn't it?
Julie: Yeah. As and B minus.
Chris: Okay. So you were on honor roll, basically?
Chris: And I was on the dean's list at Piedmont. You are 19, but you'll be 20 in July?
Chris: July 13th, wasn't it?
Julie: Yes it was.
Chris: Oh, no wait...
Julie: Wait, was it-
Chris: Oh yeah, July 13th.
Julie: Yeah, July 13th.
Chris: Okay. Yeah. Remind me so I'll remember to let her know when to get you your present.
Julie: Ah, alright.
Chris: Hmm. Right. So, you said you won't be able to afford to make the trip right away...
Chris: Hmm. Tell me, how much money are you making currently at your current jobs.
Julie: Uh...not enough, Chris. Not enough. It's-it's just the economy's--the economy's so awful it's just-
Chris: Yeah. I hear you. Hmm. You're saving that though, aren't you?
Julie: Yeah. I'm making a little over minimum wage, but I don't think that's enough.
Chris: Well I tell you what, you just keep saving that and maybe you'll still be able to come in March or April.
Julie: Chris, I thought you said you were going to come to Ohio.
Chris (dismissively): Oh. Yeah, I can't come to Ohio...
Julie: But Chris, you said you would! You told me! I was so excited!
Julie: Chris, I'm not gonna...you make more money than I do every month. It's... Why do you-
Chris (sighing): Okay, well...yeah. I'll plan to come to you. Alright. I'll make plans and set money aside for a road trip over to Ohio.
Julie: Thank you.
Chris: But I'm still gonna need your address so I can get directions on MapQuest.
Chris: Like, you know, you can send that to me in a PSN message or you can spell it out for me right now and I'll write it down.
Julie: I guess I'll send you a PS...3 message.
Chris: Alright. That'll be easy to understand.
Chris: At least I know you're over in Cleveland, Ohio.
Chris: And there was another friend of mine-oh, I'm sorry, go ahead.
Julie: I noticed that you actually said Ich bin Schwule wrong. It's Ich bin Schwule.
Chris: Oh. Okay, how is it spelled?
Julie: No-no, just-you-you have it right, up to, uh, the last part. It's Schwule, not Schwell.
Julie: Yes, there we go.
Chris: So it sounds like, uh, spelled S-C-H-W-A-L?
[The correct spelling would indeed be "Ich bin schwul." as "schwule" translates to "[multiple] gays".]
Chris: Okay. I'll have to memorize that E to an A.
Julie: Yeah. So try saying it again.
Chris: Ich bin Schwule.
Julie: There you go. Hmm. I love you too.
Chris: Ich bin Schwule from my heart, Julie.
Chris: Oh, by the way you know, I have to leave the computer for a moment because my mom called me to go downstairs and she had bought me a slice of pizza when she got herself one earlier this afternoon.
Chris: So I basically picked up my slice, put it on a plate and put it in the fridge.
Chris: Then she also asked me to bring her down some water and Sprite.
Chris: But, uh, but (garbled) computer (garbled) big heavy, big bulky pizza box for ya.
Chris: -made me forget.
Chris: And my mom ended up coming upstairs and getting a water and a Sprite.
Chris: And she gave me a little bit of a discussion about, uh, my mom being more important than my friends.
Julie: Aww. Hey, Chris?
Chris: And also, like you know-one thing she said that kind of irritated me a bit...
Chris: It was like "What have those friends done for you? They haven't done anything."
Julie: That's not nice.
Chris: And then I said-
Julie: Chris, can I ask you a quick question since we're in the confidentially of, uh-
Chris: I beg to differ.
Julie: -since the PSN chat is confidential? Can I ask, who do you truly value more: your mother or me?
Chris: I value my mother very much 'cause, you know, she's my mother and I value you because you're my sweetheart to be.
Chris: And I'd really like to be with you or have you come to me as soon as possible. But I will plan on coming to Ohio within the next couple of months.
Julie: Aww, I was thinking you could come here for your birthday, it'd be awesome.
Chris: Hmm. I see. Yeah. I ch-I checked (garbled) not without the budget right now.
Julie (disappointed): Oh.
Chris: I'm (garbled) my next tugboat.
Chris: And I'll be able to make the trip in March or April.
Julie: Maybe you should ask your parents what they think about it, you coming to Ohio.
Chris: Yeah. Of course, first I'll have to get your address then I can get directions off of MapQuest.
Julie: Yeah, I'll send you the address. But Ohio's only like one state over, isn't it?
Chris: Uh, hang on, let me check my, uh, coin map. I got it out here in the hallway hanging on the, uh, just next door to my room. Um, actually Ohio is separated by one state between Virginia.
Chris: Actually it's more like two. It's like one state layer. On the western part of Virginia, if you consider that small bit of edge between Ohi-between it and Ohio is Kentucky. But for the rest of the northwest of Virginia, between Ohio and Virginia, is, uh, West Virginia.
Julie: Ah. Are you go-You'll still be able to make it, right? Because I really want to see you.
Chris: Yeah. I wi-I will definitely try to make plans on making the trip to come and see you. I might bring my mother with me, is that a problem or is that okay?
Julie: Well I dunno, 'cause I was thinking that when you get here...you know.
Chris: But, uh, after we meet then we get down to that I'm sure my mom will respect my privacy.
Julie: Chris, I really don't think you should bring your mother. Chris, maybe you could stay with me for a while.
Chris: Yeah, I hear ya. Hmm. Something else I'll have to think about. But at least I have your pictures and your letter and all I need is your address and so I-
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